Faith, trust & baby dust! ✨💕✨ TTC 12 months + 🤞🏼 On this rollercoaster together with a little love, support and giggles to get us by! 💕

@HopefulGlow I was considering looking for a new job even before we started TTC 2 years ago but I held off as I thought a baby was in my near future.. 😪. I hesitated taking this new job as I started to think ‘but what if I need IVF? Will they understand?’ Then I just thought you know what, sod it 😂 I’m living for the now and will deal with the problems as they arrive. Have you applied for any jobs, or just browsing?

Crossing everything that the wicked witch stays away for you! Are you usually like clockwork?

I’m doing good thank you, just started temping for this cycle and trying to stay positive, looking at my app today I realised this is my last chance for a BFP before Christmas😮‍💨. Sometimes I can’t believe most women are lucky enough never to go through this, to fall pregnant accidentally, or within a few cycles.. it’s strange as I do believe this (albeit awful) experience has made me a more rounded person in a way, it feels like part of who I am. I try to remind myself how lucky I am to have other things in my life, but man, some days are definitely harder than others.

Sorry, I’ve gone a bit off track there! Deep thoughts for a Tuesday hehe. Xxxx

@LA9610 Ooh, that's good you have been able to open up to your boss, how did you feel after talking to him? My previous boss was a woman who had (unsuccessfully..) been through IVF, I hadn't told her about our struggles but I knew if I did she would of been super supportive. I've recently taken a new job and my boss is male, which I feel a little weird about if I do have to confide in him eventually, he is lovely but I just think a woman would be more understanding. I would much prefer having my previous boss if we do end up on the IVF path, but I just couldn't keep delaying getting a new job 'in case I got pregnant', it was starting to hold me back.

Loops, I am reluctant to tag you but I'm feeling a little worried about you! Please know we are here if you want to need any emotional support and I'd absolutley encourage you to seek help from your GP, you don't have to go through this alone 💓.

How are you all ladies doing @Amy259 @AZ1992X @HopefulGlow @suzy124 @xoJellyBean xx

@suzy124 the month after, last month, I was 3 days later than normal… so went from much earlier, to late! So maybe keep testing just in case?

Ahh okay. It’s a bit mad to me that care isn’t more standardised when it comes to investigating it all xx

@Amy259 it's just non-existent! Started testing cd11, no positives and they're getting fainter. Currently cd17 and I normally ov cd16. Oh well, onwards onto next month...

Also don't think it was by choice, nhs don't do hycosy in Hampshire but not sure what the reason is xx

@suzy124 ahh okay, I wonder how they choose which one to give us - it’s so weird we all get treated differently, isn’t it?

I ovulated early the cycle I had it, by about 4-5 days. So we actually pretty much missed it I think, but I had been told that the dye can stay in your uterus/on the lining until you shed it with your next af so you’re unlikely to conceive that month.

What has it done to your ov? Xx

@Amy259 it's basically a continuous x-ray so they were watching it live on screen and then taking stills. No real difference between it and hycosy except the radiation! Was your ovulation normal the month you had yours? Xx

Hi girls,

Sorry - can’t keep up whilst away with work, it’s all go.

@HopefulGlow how are you feeling ahead of tomorrow? Swaying either way?

@LA9610 great news about your scans and fingers crossed for that nice big follicle!

@suzy124 lovely to hear from you, and thank you ♥️ I’m glad your hsg was clear - is that the one where they use dye then X-ray you? Rather than watching it all live on the screen like in the hycosy? Or have a got the totally wrong..?

Loops I don’t want to tag you and make this flash up on your phone, but if you read this know that I’m sending you so much love and strength xx

Hope you’re all having a good week girls! Xx

Thanks @suzy124 I thought you would understand

@Loops01 I'm so sorry. There's just nothing like it. I have felt the same burden on my mental health which is why I'm not on here much, but was just tagging you in case you decide you want to come back someday. You know where we are

Please look after yourself. And get yourself on anti-depressants safe for pregnancy. I didn't want any potential risk but I had to go that route as don't think I'd be here otherwise xx

Thanks @suzy124 but I'm taking a step back. We have decided to stop 'trying'. It's really been difficult for my mental health knowing that there is nothing wrong but it's not working and not able to try some cycles because of our opposite shifts. I can't take it. If it happens before ivf 2023 then great but I am losing myself and pushing away friends and family etc and I just can't.

Good news about Amy and your scans.

I won't be on here anymore. I am at the lowest point I've ever been and I need to stop before I completely lose myself and my life.

Hi everyone, sorry I haven't been on here in ages. Still not feeling able to talk about fertility like I used to but don't want to drop off the thread altogether. Thanks for setting up the new chat @HopefulGlow and just tagging my OG @HJen22 and @Loops01 for when they're ready to find us.

Massive congratulations @Amy259 I'm so happy for you 🥰

We took a break from trying last month, then at the start of this month I had my hsg which showed tubes were fine. Wasn't painful at all however it seems to have killed my ovulation this month. Had my AMH bloods too but don't know results yet. So atm waiting to hear from consultant and expecting IVF at the start of 2022.

Sorry there's really too much to catch up on but wishing everyone the best with appointments and cycles 🤞and hello to all the newcomers! Xx

@HopefulGlow, yes it is a bit frustrating - they did say that they actually had a meeting yesterday to discuss putting on more SA clinics to try and get the waiting list down so they said they may be able to get him in sooner but worst case it will be at some point in Q1 next year.

Has anyone spoken to their boss about their fertility struggles? I just had a 1-2-1 with my manager and I do chartership exams and he was asking if I was planning to complete the next level and I said i'll keep doing them up until the point I have kids and then will probably either bin it off or just take a break. Then he asked me if I was planning to have children soon - so I said might as tell you but we have been trying for a while and it's not happened, nothing appears to be wrong medically so just waiting to see if it either happens in the next year or do IVF. He was really supportive but I always feel weird discussing personal things at work and not sure if I should have told him or not! He has been asking if I am okay recently as i've had quite a few fertility related appointments (I just said everything was fine and didn't go into detail), so I felt like I should just tell him so he knows in future.

Morning all,

I hope everyone’s doing ok?

@User1400 I love your positivity, defo try and keep that and don’t listen to the niggles. ❤️

@Nora11 I’m glad to hear your appointment was relatively positive and its good that they’ve said you can take proactive steps to try and increase your chances. 🤞

@LA9610 that’s great news that everything looks ok and it must be very reassuring for you. I’m glad
OH is home this month so you are able to try this cycle. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.

@HopefulGlow Yes, I can go full on Christmas mode now and I can now watch Christmas movies without people thinking I’m strange 😂😂

Hi Everyone,

Been a busy old few days for me helping my mum move house so didn't have time to check the thread and missed lots of messages! Hope you are all well :)

I'm just back from my first subfertility appointment which was a consultation with the Gynaecologist with OH, and a chlamydia swab and a vaginal ultrasound for me. So that was my second ultrasound and she confirmed everything looks good, there is a follicle on the right about to be released in the next few days apparently (I had AF last week so that makes sense, although would mean I am ovulating a few days earlier than any app tells me I am but we DTD at least every other day anyway so not an issue. Also she had my day 21 blood results from the doctor which confirmed I did ovulate last month too.

So now it is just a case of waiting for OH to get his SA, the waiting list is up to 5 months now apparently so it could be March/April before he gets that but I really hope something happens in that time. Once they have his results if he comes back normal then that's when i'll get the HyCosy she said.

It's good to know that there is nothing wrong with me and i'm hopeful that this will be our month given I know there is an egg there and OH is at home, we have been on it since CD4 so fingers crossed.

@Amy259, glad to see everything still fine with your little bean.

Welcome @xoJellyBean @Msrivia @Nora11

Hope everyone has had a good Monday so far! We had our consultation earlier and it was fairly positive. We do have a reduced likelihood of getting pregnant due to my partner's SA but he said it's not impossible, just likely to take longer. He has recommended 3 months of lifestyle changes/vitamins and then retest and see where we are. At that point we will be eligible to be referred on the NHS so we can at least get on the waiting list for treatment then whether things have improved or not... and he thought our chances would be very good if we have IVF ICSI which is encouraging. I am hopeful that we can get pregnant naturally first if we get a bit healthier though! Secretly dreaming of a pre-Christmas BFP like a few of you ladies, even though I know any lifestyle changes will take at least 2 months to come into effect... But you never know right?

@xoJellyBean how long is it until your initial appointment? This was my first time speaking to someone privately as they did the tests before the consultation so they can discuss the results. I didn't find it too awkward or anything and feel very positive afterwards even though it wasn't strictly good news! I think it feels good to get some information and feel like we are doing something. I hope yours will also be positive for you! ❤️

Happy November 1st all 🎅🏼 😁

How is everyone doing? I dropped off the last thread a few days ago and can’t quite remember where I left off! I’m on CD2 of cycle twentygodknowswhat.. I’m feeling strangely optimistic about the next two months but there is the ever niggling voice telling me I’m silly to get my hopes up..

@msrivia Welcome! So sorry you're going through this awful experience too.

I know what you mean re your DH not wanting to tell anyone you're TTC. I feel like my own worst enemy in that respect, I don't feel like I should have to open up about some of my lowest moments to everyone, but then I get upset when I feel like people are being insensitive, even when they don't know we are TTC! I try to limit my social media intake. There will always be situations out of our control but if I can try and limit some of what I see online, it helps a great deal.

Sorry you have to take this month out of TTC, the idea of missing another month feels like torture but it can be so needed for your mental health, just to give yourself permission to unwind!

Welcome @xojellybean & @Nora11!

@Teachermummy83 Sorry to hear you're struggling too. Did you end up conceiving DC1 naturally? I hope you don't mind me saying, it gives me hope when I hear of people getting their BFPs after such a long time. We have been TTC for over 2 years with no whiff of a BFP, it can be really difficult to hold on to any hope that it will ever happen for us..

Sorry if I have missed anyone xxx

@HopefulGlow absolutely, Im so excited about Christmas this year. Found this meme about officially being able to talk about Christmas now it’s November. 🎄⛄️

It may change depending if ovulation is on time but I think morning will be my only option 😂😂.

Hope everyone’s week isn’t too bad ❤️

Morning @HopefulGlow, yes that’s very true - I’ll have a few glasses of Prosecco at Christmas if I’m not.

Hopefully it won’t turn up but if it does hopefully you’ll be very occupied with Christmas stuff and it’ll take your mind off it (a little), My app is saying my peak in December will come around Christmas Day which will be fun to try and squeeze in 🙈.

It’s just a really relaxed getaway - we have a lodge with hot tub booked so really looking forward to it & I’ll probably eat out a few times 😂😃 x.

Break away even*

@HopefulGlow It really would, I’d love a bfp before Christmas but trying to be realistic as I only have this cycle and then the next before Christmas.

Thank you, I guess I naively thought it would have happened by now. I kept seeing/hearing things like your more fertile in the months after but unfortunately that hasn’t been the case with me.

Feel ok about this cycle - I’ve got a break coming around when AF would be due to finish so at least I have something to look forward too if it does turn up.

X.