Feb 2020 Bus Pt 4

@MimiArm it was my last one so I was hoping that worked!
@Juno231 I've got a frer left (that's it now bar ICs) but it seemed a waste using it. 🤣

@paintfairy Happy days. I know what a relief it is to get it!

I have one digital left and I'm not buying any more. Not even sure if I will use it to be honest as pretty pointless!

@MimiArm got my 3+ this morning! Massive relief!

@MimiArm I'm glad you feel that way. Fingers crossed for you 🤞

@paintfairy I think 70+% isn't bad all things considered. And yes, the fact we have got this far is already a miracle so we're due some luck now.

I'll be having my scans at my private clinic but you can google for sure. There are lots of clinics you can go to. Window to the Womb is a popular one and there are clinics all over the UK. It costs about £70 for a scan.

I'm going to try my hardest to relax a bit. This pregnancy feels different somehow to my last and my gut feeling is that it's going to be ok (I think!)

@MimiArm sounds about right. I looked at the clinic stats. Over 3 years (per embryo transferred) - 44 out of 168 people my age doing icsi got pregnant. 33 of those had a birth. So I worked out its like a 70 odd% chance of it being OK. Which seems not high enough really. But then we've already done well against the odds, getting a positive test in the first place? So I suppose I should take comfort from that. But you just don't? 🤣

I might book a private scan between the 8 and 12 (especially if the 12 ends up being later than 12) to reassure myself too. Do you just Google places that do it?

I think it's normal to be paranoid when you've got issues getting pregnant in the first place. At the end of the day it's a hard journey when you've had problems, so a MC is like an extra kick to an already seemingly impossible journey.

@paintfairy - I can see their logic. From 8 weeks, the risk drops a lot. I found an online calculator that asks for your age and stats then calculates the % of a successful outcome. It's prob a load of shite but it says that I now have a 75% chance of success. I'll take that! I imagine yours would be even better as you're younger than me.

I've booked follow up scans on 13 December (8+1) and 22 December (9+3) to keep me sane over Xmas. If I make it to 22 Dec with nothing going wrong, I think I'll be ok then until 12 week NHS scan. I'm just even more paranoid because of my history.

@MimiArm clinic called. They usually do them at 8 weeks because you can see more. And they prefer to wait until then because things can can wrong between 6 and then. So I'm going to have to wait until 14 December! She said on the positive side, if everything is OK by then, then it's sightly more reassuring that you'll get to 12 weeks and the risk lessens slightly.

Longest 3 weeks ever!

@MimiArm me neither. And the clinic never bothered calling me back. 🙄 Honestly, the nhs may have paid but its still 6k a pop and people can't even be arsed to call you.
And mine is a fitbit. It seems to be selective when it buzzes and what it does. 🤣
I hate trapped wind. I've just taken rennie but I don't think it'll do much. What I ate at lunch feels like it's sat under my rib cage. I have managed to go to the toilet but I don't feel any better. 😫

@paintfairy Yep, I hear you, loud and clear. I have no idea how I will make it through the next week weeks waiting for the scan.

I think we both need to ditch the heart rate monitors. Easier said than done for me as I wear an Apple Watch and I like that I know when someone is ringing me by the buzz on my wrist!

Trapped wind is not nice. I have a bowel disorder and have suffered with it for years and am often in agony. I find stretching arms up into air can help. Also. Lie on your back and lift him up and down 😂 tends to loosen things too. Prune juice also gets the bowels moving (but it's horrible).

@MimiArm yes! Literally the day after the test the excitement wears off and its back to worry. Yes I meant 3+. I'm 5 weeks today exactly.
And yes I've had the rhr panic this morning! Mine has been consistently high. Not massively high but LP type phase high. And today it dropped. Cue panic. 🤦‍♀️ I think it does vary and its best not to look. But that was giving me some reassurance before.
I've been struggling with constipation and bloating since transfer really and its still here. Worse at night. I then get trapped wind and it's just so uncomfortable. I'm now starting to get trapped wind higher up too on and off. My boobs have hurt throughout. My mouth seems really dry atm? And I keep getting a funny taste in it. The only stomach pains I have i think are digestive related but it's hard to tell. I panic I don't have pains in case that means something and then panic when I do in case it's bad. 🙄 Where is the asylum? 🤣

@paintfairy Honestly, you are never prepared for how much you will worry! It's bittersweet and the excitement wears off pretty quickly, to be replaced with worry!!

So, I assume you mean 3+? It should read 3+ once your 5+ weeks.

I did a digital yesterday (I was exactly 5 weeks yesterday) and it still said 2-3. Of course I panicked all day. I literally just did another one (with a 4 hour hold) and it says 3+ so that's calmed me down a bit. You're a day or so behind me I think, so wait til Wednesday? I wouldn't be too alarmed if it's still showing 2-3 though. I read that lots of women never see 3+ and have perfectly healthy pregnancies!

Today's worry for me is my RHR. It's been sky high for weeks but I've had a big drop today. Hoping that it climbs as the day goes by up again! 🙈

The only symptom I have is sore boobs and the odd cramping. Oh, and insomnia. Though, our cat was sick last night and the smell of it literally made me wretch a few times. Normally I can cope fine with animal sickness but not last night. I think I felt slightly peaky this morning too. Do you have any symptoms?

@MimiArm I've called and I'm waiting for them to call back. See if I can get it earlier.

How are you doing? I have to admit I'm already stressing it's all going to go wrong. Why can't we just enjoy it? 😭
Do we know when the CB digital will show 4+ weeks? I've only got 1 left so I want to try to do it when it should show that. To reassure myself (hopefully!).

@paintfairy Yeah - I think the guidelines are too broad to mean much. Let's just ignore them!

8 weeks is quite late for an early scan. You could always get a private one for about £65-£100 if you can't wait that long and for reassurance.

@MimiArm the stats are widely variable depending on the way they are manipulated. Where do they even come from? They don't record miscarriage in England at all. Which is ludicrous. The age thing is also variable because some women are verging on menopause and have no eggs by 38 and some it's 50. So age can only be a guideline anyway. So no, I don't think once you hit 40 things suddenly change in one day. I'm nearer 39 than 38 now. But which bracket do you pick? The better one. 🤣

I have looked and the paperwork says 7 weeks so why I've got to wait 8 I don't know. Just for extra torture. 🤣

@paintfairy - Yep, pretty much. I never did see a heartbeat last time so if the scan at 7 weeks has a good strong heartbeat, I will instantly feel relieved. The heartbeat can generally be seen from 6 weeks + so if it's not there at week 7, there is something wrong.

I'm trying to calculate the odds of it happening again. I've read that only 2% of women have 2 miscarriages in a row. On the face of that, I feel better. BUT dr google also tells me that for woman "over 40", 50% will miscarry. So how does the 2% recurrent percentage fit in??! Also, surely the "over 40" covers women right up to mid/late forties. I only turned 40 a few months ago so I'd like back into the 35-39 category please 😂 Does that mean the day before my birthday I had a 75% chance of carrying to term but then the very next day, that dropped to 50%? Surely not ...

Deffo send in your form now as it takes them ages to process and book you in. I've mine ready to drop off now.

@MimiArm God, so you've got ages to worry yet. Although if everything looks OK at the first one, hopefully it'll reassure you a bit?

They've actually just called me. It seems ages away but it's on 14th December, Wych I think is 8 weeks. I guess it can't be earlier because they are looking for a heartbeat. She's told me i can contact my GP to register with the midwife. It seems crackers doing that now. But I can't really leave it until then either, as that's late for going on the scan list to get one for 12 weeks. Lord. This doesn't seem real?

@paintfairy Ah I see. It will probably be 6 or 7 weeks. Any earlier than 6 weeks is pretty much a waste of time in my opinion.

Hope you feel better soon. I've not been sleeping well at all this week - probably all the worry.

So last time, the timeline was pretty much:

• scan at what should have been 6 weeks but measured just under 5. Was able to see healthy sac and yolk

• back two weeks later at what should have been 8 weeks and measured 6+6. Was able to see healthy sac, yoke, fetal pole and what "looked" like the beginnings of a heartbeat flutter

• back two weeks later at what should have been 10 weeks and still measuring exactly 6+6 and no heartbeat.

A week later then (at what should have been 11 weeks) physical miscarriage happened over the course of a day or two.

It was clearly doomed from the beginning as I knew from when I first had a BFP that I couldn't possibly have been just under 5 weeks at that first scan.

@MimiArm I honestly can't remember. It's probably written down somewhere in the insane amount of info we had. I am meant to call the clinic today with an update (which I've done and left a message) but they still haven't called me back. I would expect them at that point to sort me a scan date and more progesterone. So I thought I'd know the answer, but I don't. I feel it is 7 weeks though but I might be making it up.

Yes the worrying never stops and it's ridiculous you can't just enjoy it. I feel wretched mind so I'm not enjoying it anyway. 🤣 Literally had no sleep last night.

How many weeks did you get to last time?

@paintfairy Do you have an idea of when you will have your first scan?

I've probably already said, but I'm going on 6 December when I will be 7+1. I don't want to go too early, only to be told to come back in a week or two so I'm gonna hold out until then.

I've booked another one on 22 Dec to get me through Xmas without worrying as much.

I think in most cases, if you are a strong heartbeat, the chances of something going wrong fall considerably. Obviously it can still happen at any point, but the risk drops a lot.

You're never prepared for how how much you will worry after getting the BFP (especially when it's taken so much to get there).

@MimiArm yeah, I'm not sure I'm going to torture myself keep testing. They do say officially it means nothing. Its so hard though isn't it, and I'll be the same, nervous until my viability scan. Problem is the drugs will keep it there whatever in most cases so you just don't know what's going on.

@paintfairy Yep, 2-3 weeks just means 4-5 weeks pregnant so it's spot on. Should go to 3+ by next week.

If I learnt anything from the first time around it's that's tests and symptoms mean nothing (says she who still tests ... 🙄).

You can have darkening lines and increasing symptoms when it's already gone wrong, or you can have ok lines and no symptoms and it's perfectly fine.

All you can do is sit tight and pray to whoever and wait to see the elusive heartbeat on a scan. I wish I could afford a Doppler lol

@Juno231 oh FFS were his precise words.... 🤷‍♀️🤣