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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Pregnancy

40 replies

Lusky76 · 10/10/2021 22:42

Hi everyone I'm new here..but felt I needed some guidance ..
I am 37 years old, and have been trying to conceive for 4 months now, the last 2 months I have used the ovulation sticks, so had had sex days leading up to and on the lh surge etc..so on the most fertile days.
I sadly had an abortion 7 years ago which was a very hard time but I couldn't go through as he was an abusive man.
The man I am with now I would love a baby with we both do but now it's not happening and it's really hard to cope with as when i got pregnant before 7 years ago it was straight away the first month.
I'm older and sadly have to take that into account.. the man I'm with is quite a bit older than me late 50s. He has 2 older children.
I am now fretting...as it isn't happening
I'm healthy and an average weight the man I'm with hes fit and not overweight, fairly healthy smokes sometimes, no drink
Thank you in advance for your help
X

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LittleMysSister · 12/10/2021 22:02

Thanks Lusky, it's hard isn't it! Even though both of us truly are in the early days, it doesn't feel like it when you've been expecting it to happen at once.

I have said before on here, I never in my wildest dreams thought I could have unprotected sex for over 4 months and not end up pregnant. I turned 33 last month, but my DP is 44. Yes, taking Pregnacare as of this month, was taking Seven Seas before that.

I am hoping that maybe the first couple of months didn't really count as maybe my body was still getting back to normal after the pill, but I know it's grasping really as my periods have been regular since stopping. One glimmer of hope is that my period lasted for 7 days this month, which is more in line with what I remember was normal for me from before being on the pill. The first few months after come off were only 4 days, which is shorter than I've ever had before.

Were you on hormonal conception before this last 4 months?

Lusky76 · 12/10/2021 20:35

Hello littlemyssister so lovely hearing your story but sad for you at the same time
I did exactly the same thing.. was careful with everything becuase i convinced myself I was 2 months ago..

I totally sympathise with you...

And the 4 months I feel totally the same like I given up hope even though it breaks my heart..

Never realise how it's going to be until its happening...

How old are you if you don't mind me asking xx

Are you taking pregnacare?

I even started taking fish oil!

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LittleMysSister · 12/10/2021 19:15

PS. Meant to add, I'd think it was a good sign that you have both successfully created pregnancies previously, even if they were a little while ago :)

My DP has 2 kids so I'm not as worried about him, but I've never been pregnant ever.

LittleMysSister · 12/10/2021 19:14

Isn't it funny(read: awful) how much TTC takes over your thoughts, and so quickly?

I came off the mini pill in mid-May. In June & July I was CONVINCED I would definitely be pregnant, no question. Even took it easy in the gym/drinking because I was like "I must be". Obviously wasn't!

Then August we missed most of the relevant days due to being away, and since my period that month I have begun to feel like it won't happen for me now Sad.

September I convinced myself to get back on it, used OPKs properly for the first time, covered all the days around my ovulation (according to OPKs), yet still nothing. This month I'm just thinking can I even be arsed?? I feel like I've given up hope and it's only been 4 months Confused.

Lianna93 · 12/10/2021 18:38

@Lusky76 ha yeah! That was me :)

I'm 27

Lusky76 · 12/10/2021 18:15

Hello miliao and thankk you! That's really helpful to know can take up to year which is normal whatever the age xx thank you

He bought some sperm tests but not used them yet
He said he had a full check up at doctors today weight height lungs etc and all good..
But unfortunately it's the sperm which they didn't check !!!
But he is fit..
Xx

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Miliao · 12/10/2021 17:45

It’s a fallacy that older men are fine. Sperm gets poorer in quality with more deformation. He can get checked out very easily and relatively cheaply. Please try not to panic, up to a year is completely normal ttc - no matter what your age. You’re not even old!

Lusky76 · 12/10/2021 17:40

Not sure if it was you but someone said on here no one prepares you for ttc... so true xx

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Lusky76 · 12/10/2021 17:39

Oh bless you how old are you if you don't mind me asking xx
Thank you been good coming on here so supportive

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Lianna93 · 12/10/2021 17:30

@Lusky76

It's never easy ☹️ Remember, you're not alone in this though & there's a whole community of people who will listen & support you through it all.

I'm exhausted today. Just found out I've got a folate deficiency, so I've to start taking folic acid for the next 4 months - which may be why I'm struggling to conceive.
I go back on Friday for more blood tests to see if I'm ovulating, if not I'm being referred.
Just glad I'm starting to get answers though.

Lusky76 · 12/10/2021 17:02

Hello Lianna93 I feel somewhat sad it almost becomes an obsession... I've always wanted children but never thought I would be in this position where I'm craving it so much.. it becomes all you think about 😥 I was silly to think I had no problem last time that'd it would be the same in the future!
Thank you for asking... really kind. And hope you're ok...

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Lianna93 · 12/10/2021 16:23

@Lusky76 Sorry to hear that, how are you feeling today?

Lusky76 · 12/10/2021 09:32

I'm getting numbness which I often get before period ..its due in just over a week.
Sad as I.know 5th month ttc not happening 😢

Positive replies thank you guys xx

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Lusky76 · 12/10/2021 09:30

Thank you redandwhite and daydreamer believers

Wow 2nd child 2 years after first time 1st child..see these things you don't imagine unless it happens to you
Thank.you all for confirming replies xx

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redandwhite1 · 11/10/2021 22:32

I conceived my first within a month of trying

My second I stupidly thought would be similar but it took nearly 2 years!!

Don't stress, it'll make it harder.... I'm sure it's just a matter of time

Wishing you all the luck!

TheDaydreamBelievers · 11/10/2021 22:30

I understand how stressful it is but 4 cycles isnt a lot, its totally normal to take up to a year to conceive. Your cycles are regular, you are ovulating (or certainly your bloods suggest you are). If you get to >6mo you can get tests as you are over 35yrs.

Definitely important to have sex leading up to ovulation. Aim for every 2nd day throughout fertile period (CD 9-20).

Lusky76 · 11/10/2021 21:24

Hello girlmom2 yeah I been taking the pregnacare for just over 2 months xx

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girlmom2 · 11/10/2021 20:39

I would highly recommend the pregnacare conception tablets for him and her!

Lusky76 · 11/10/2021 20:30

Ttcbabya I sorry.. I know how tough it is. Xx

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Lusky76 · 11/10/2021 20:29

Thank you lianna haha yes that's true and Charlie Chaplin!!!xx I not had hormone tests but blood tests doc said would do everything to check. Get regular 28 cycle xx

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Lianna93 · 11/10/2021 20:19

@ttcbabya Sorry to hear that :(

ttcbabya · 11/10/2021 19:59

Well AF just arrived for me. I'm out this month

ttcbabya · 11/10/2021 19:51

@Lusky76

I had blood tests all ok x
That's great news! Maybe worth having your partner tested too now? xx
Lianna93 · 11/10/2021 19:47

@Lusky76 Men don't typically need to worry about their age when it comes to conceiving... I mean, look at Mick Jagger 😳
However, it couldn't hurt to have your partner go for tests to check what his sperm count it 🤷🏻‍♀️
That'll likely be our next steps if my tests all come back clear.

Try not to worry too much, because stress & worry can knock everything out of balance & can be the reason for you not conceiving - which I know, is so much easier said than done.

I hope it works out for and for us all 🥰

Lusky76 · 11/10/2021 19:25

Wondering if possibility could be my partner with him being alot older ? It's Just so sad when you've timed it exactly right and get regular periods ...happened when I didn't want it to and now it won't! Thank you all for you advice its so comforting xxc

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