Anyone 9dpo

Omg I have no idea why I've missed so much chat here?!
So much has happened!
@90mamabear were defo all in this together and all here for each others down days, never feel silly or that your alone because having people to talk to going through this is definitely needed as sometimes it's not possible to talk to people who are closest to us!
Your doing everything you possibly can❤️ big hugs to you.. I briefly read you fell before about 10 years ago? Or did I read that wrong?

@Melabells what fantastic news for you!!! Congratulations!! 😍

@RT65 thanks for sharing to us all! I need all the help I can bloody get right now 😂
Trying to stay positive but its so so hard!

Just found this thread and I just wanted to say how amazing it is!!! Me and my hubby have been ttc for about 14-15 months and found out last week that this month was a winner and so I've just signed up to mumsnet and seen this thread. This thread would have been an absolute rock for me had I known it was here. Keep supporting each other!!

I also wanted to share what worked for us in case it helps anyone else. We tried pregnacare his/hers for 3 months and got nowhere, tried ovulation tracking and got nowhere. What did work for us was that for the last month we were DTD every 2-3 days (we were every 3-4 in previous months), started eating breakfast, cut down on coffee and also started using proceive max his/hers and a ferti-lily conception cup. It was the first month in ages where I had no idea when I ovulated and I was gobsmacked as we were considering going to the docs to ask for help. We'd been taking the proceive max for 3-4 weeks, whereas everything else had been a gradual change for the last 2-3 months. Hope these tips helps someone as it seems to have done the trick for us (just hoping things continue positively now!).

P.s. really do hope this helps someone rather than me coming across as bragging, I really hope it doesn't come cross that way as I know how stressful and hard it can be seeing others get pregnant all around you and wonder why it isn't you yet. But keep going and doing all the things you can. There is always hope, and maybe when you least expect it!!!

@90mamabear actually this month no I didn't use opk to confirm as I ran out. But I had a day of lots of EWMand my usual ovulation discomfort. We've been so busy with kids and moving house we hardly did the deed so thought I was out for sure . We dtd two days before ovulation and it seems that was enough.

@90mamabear I will get one in the morning thanks! I'm on a night shift tonight (nurse) annoyingly :)
@Melabells it came up after 3 minutes
I'm not getting too excited as I've had some spotting and cramps but weird for AF to come on day 25 for me. Thanks both xx

@Ladylou17 that looks like a positive to me! Did it appear in time frame?

@90mamabear it came up after 3 minutes. To be honest I'm not sure I didn't take any ovulation tests I just did bbt with ff xx

So @90mamabear I've had cramps this evening and some light spotting convinced it's AF but I did a boots early test and got this... no idea what to think now can you see it?xx

Hi all
My AF has arrived early so as suspected I'm out this month. Keeping my fingers crossed for everyone still

@90mamabear

Haha your husband is going to be as bewildered as mine is about the organisation I’ve got in place 😂😂😂

no I didn’t think you sounded stupid or rude at all! If anything, it proves that realistically before 11/12dpo you’re not going to get anything at all to go by from a frer. But again, everyone is different and every body is different. I can only go by what my experience was!

🥰🥰🥰🥰

@90mamabear
I’m on 6dpo and I know I’m not pregnant - I have a sixth sense with these things lol. It’s okay though because as you can see above I have my coping strategies 🥰
No I didn’t test prior (again being infertile and having IVF you know that you have to give your body time to implant and grow the embryo) and I won’t test this time until my period is missed.

Sorry if my advice or message is upsetting or seems bossy - I don’t mean it to be at all. I have just been through it myself and infertility has taught me so much about the mind, the body etc that I hope I can help others. Please feel free to tell me to piss off 😂

@90mamabear your feelings are completely valid and you have every right to feel the way that you do and present those feelings in the way that you are. You have mild PCOS and there’s a gap between your children, that’s the reason you’re concerned - you’re not annoying, you’re not obsessing, your worries are based in reality and it’s ok to give space to those worries.
However, there are things that helped me with my fertility worries (remember what’s going on with you is nowhere near severe like mine so please don’t think I’m saying there’s a problem - I can guarantee that there most likely isn’t) which could help you?
I downloaded the Zita West meditation audioguide and did it every night before bed. It asks you to visualise the egg and sperm and conception itself. It helped me to feel like I was helping and that the out of control feeling I had was more manageable because I was physically doing something to help. (If you want proof that this helps read ‘How the Mind can Heal the Body’ - it’s all scientific studies were the mind has healed and aided in conception etc) I still do them now this time ttc and it helps.

Also I put a plan in place (I had a folder with DD lol - my husband thought I was mad) where I had a time limit. I do for this baby too - mine is ttc for 10 months then have X and Y tests done and Ive even researched a clinic and have the details, then after this IVF etc. I’m not saying you’ll get to IVF level (at all!!) but it’s the having a plan which helps. It helps me to be ok with the bfn because I’ve got a next step if that makes sense. Like I tell myself ‘it’s ok it’s a bfn, I know what to do next - I can handle that’

Also as I mentioned before I repeat mantras to myself. I trick my mind into believing I will get pregnant again. I say ‘I know I will have a baby, I know there is a journey to be had, I know it’ll make me a better mum’ By using the term I know, instead of I think - I am able to be sure of the outcome and it lightens my mind and body in terms of thinking about ttc.

Also practically, I attribute my success in IVF a lot to lymphatic massage and every woman I’ve recommended it to (3 now) has gotten pregnant. Again I’m not a medical professional, just infertile 😂😂

Basically, just know that you’re not alone. It’s okay to feel like you and we’re all here, experiencing exactly the same thing you are. We’ve got you 💐

@90mamabear thank you lovely. Fingers crossed for you too xx