TTC how often do you have sex?

@SemiFeralDalek 🙌 🙌 🙌

I’m sorry for your loss and the long journey you’ve had

We were TTC for 10 months and for 9 of those months we were doing every other day or other day around ovulation. The biggest gap we had was 3 days. Month 10, I stopped using OPKs because they were pissing me off. I started using them because as soon as we started TTC my cycles went haywire, it was a fine balance between which would stress me out more - OPKs or not knowing when my period was due. We had sex about once a week and mostly when we wanted to. As I said, I wasn’t tracking ovulation but working out dates after, I’m pretty sure I conceived on 0-4. Based on when I think ovulation was we had sex O-10, O-4 and O+2. Similar to PP, this isn’t meant to be a brag and apologies if it comes across that way. With my periods being all over the place and not tracking ovulation I was awful to be around because I had no idea when I was due on. I was in a pretty bad mood throughout that cycle and I’m not sure why DH even wanted to have sex with me. It was also the month that I stopped taking my prenatal vitamins, basically in a strop. DH did dry January and this is the month he also reintroduced alcohol. So by all accounts, nothing should have worked that month!

Do you guys change up the times you have sex? For me and my dh we normally dtd at night, every other night (if we have the energy) due to work etc... we've been trying a number of months now so wondering if that's affecting it🤔

Every other day from end of period until a couple of days after ovulation worked for us ❤

We DTD every other day from a week before my ovulation and couple days after. I'm not exactly sure my ovulation date so went with what an app said. Then maybe once for rest of the month. I conceived on cycle 1 for my first baby. Currently trying for number 2, on cycle 2. I'm still breastfeeding my first so not sure if that will have an impact this time round. Good luck everyone on the Journey xx

Thank you! I have PCOS so we were really surprised. Still only early and my tests aren't too strong yet but definitely positive. Good luck

I conceived this cycle, our first cycle.
We DTD every other day/every 2 depending on how we were feeling and if we were in the mood. Up until CD21. I have 29 day cycles. We started the day after my period stopped.

@frenchie86

thanks , it was a nightmare using opks and trying to schedule sex around my dh and I working shifts .

I still pinch myself that I had him .

@Frenchie86

so all 3 were total flukes. we never actively TTC-d, we wanted lots of kids so were happy with whatever, whenever.

DS2 - conceived the day before I was supposed to have my period. I didn't know I ovulated so much later than usual

DS3 - I'm not even sure how to best explain. I was still bf DS2 at 8m and had no periods. so either DTD triggered ovulation (apparently it's a thing...though it wasn't spectacular or anything to warrant that🤣) or I just happened to ovulate for the first time after giving birth and it was an incredible coincide.
I had to have an early scan to get an EDD.
It was fun to watch the sonographers face as her braincells were screeching to a halt when I said that my last period was over 1.5 years earlier 🤣

DS5 - my previous pg ended in a MC. took me ages to get brave, but woke up one day and thought that I was mentally ready.
We happened to DTD that evening. The next morning I knew I was pg.

I don't know when I got pg with DS1, DS4 & DD or with the baby we lost - we had no routines or anything.
With DS6 I know it was either of 2 dates, he was the only one that we actively tried to time it right because the clock was ticking.

I hope this is helpful or gives you hope.
I know from the experience of others that stress is very counterproductive to conception and also from their & our stories that sometimes it just happens when you least expect it.

I wish you all the best of luck.

@TheDaydreamBelievers you were right to sound narky. Totally insensitive advice telling someone TTC for 3 years and having fertility struggles to just relax and stop trying…read the room

Sorry @Cotswoldmama, I didn't mean that to sound so narky! I appreciate that relaxing a bit probably does help :) Just having my own struggles atm

When I got my flashing smiley we had sex every other day then when I got my static smiley we had sex that day and the day after. Got pregnant straight away but know that obviously isn't always the case but just my experience

@Cotswoldmama Im glad it worked for you but OP has been trying for 3 years, so unfortunately regular sex just isnt enough for some of us to be so lucky!

@Frenchie86 - are the NHS offering a referral to fertility services yet or have you been trapped with the same horrible catch 22 as me "oh well you conceived, so you need to wait another full year after that loss"?

I think you need to stop trying as Nd just see what happens. For me 'trying' was stopping contraception and seeing what happened. We had sex the same amount 2-3 times a week and got pregnant both times within about 3 cycles, some cycles were long as I'd come off the pill I think with my second it was 2 cycles and j was pregnant on my third but that took 3 months.

@Frenchie86 @whoknew23 Ive stopped using OPKs. Because I have repeated LH surges in mega long cycles they were just getting me hopeful about ovulating and stressing me out. Also super hard to do at work. I temp and have regular sex and thats it.

The month I conceived I only had sex maybe 3 times, of course it was the first month in ages I wasn't using OPKs.

This isn't a brag, I had a miscarriage the month before and couldn't face trying again so soon or using opks .

No idea what I done different , before the miscarriage it had taken something like 14 months to even get there.