Month 12, 6 DPO, fed up and loosing hope

@AZ1992X happy Friday to you too! Hope your manic week didn’t come with much stress.

Glad you seem to be firmly in the tww! Do you dtd every other day, or just as much as you can? I’m always so torn between a schedule or not 😂 I think scheduled is best for us because I don’t stress about potentially not dtd enough if it’s in the diary haha.

I’d love to just be up for it loads, when I was catching up after my holiday I read one of the girls said they dtd loads as standard and during this fw went wild 😂 I’m so jealous because ttc has definitely taken the spontaneity out of sex here!

Happy Friday ladies!
I hope we’re all doing ok & looking forward to the weekend. ❤️

Sorry just trying to catch up on messages, it’s been a little manic at work this week.

@Amy259 In fairness I would of absolutely googled him too 😂 - especially if he was saying all that - glad he seems to know his stuff though.

@HopefulGlow Thank you, ah really - perhaps it is just my body adjusting then. I had heard it could take a while to get back to its usual cycle.
I think I’ve ovulated now - opks are dropping and cm has dried up.

Sorry to hear you’re having a bit of a rough time these last few days - hope you start to feel a little better soon!

Glad you’re tests came back ok and hopefully it won’t be too long till you hear about the scan.

Love your positive approach even with everything you’ve been going through. If I’m honest I cannot wait to see the back of this year - not been the best and hoping 2022 will be better.

@HJen22 All good thank you! I think we’ve defo covered this month, opks have dropped so hoping bbt will help confirm I did ovulate then it’s just a waiting game.

I’m glad you was able to ask some questions that you hadn’t previously and got to find out more about the process/timelines etc and it’s good that it should start fairly quickly after January.

Hopefully you can take a step back from it all and try and get in a good place mentally ❤️

@HJen22 hello! I’m doing okay thank you, loaded with the cold for about a week now and it just will not ease up. Coughy, sniffly dtd - my husband is a lucky man 😂 CD13 here so currently at the dtd every second day stage, and doing OPKs twice a day for now until I hopefully find a peak in the coming few days.

How are you feeling after your call? Well done for staying strong and not asking what the number is, I would no doubt want to know then 100% completely regret it because you’re so right - you’d probably just worry more.

@HopefulGlow I had to google him!! He actually said the sentence “it’s what I’m famous for” so I needed to know 😂😂 yeah he did have a lovely silky voice - his name is Professor Scott Nelson just in case you fancy a listen (he has a website and Twitter too 😉). He’s the medical director of Access Fertility too, which is the company that helps people finance IVF, so I think he’s an all round good egg.

Your partner’s ex sounds like hard work, sorry you’ve got that to deal with on top of everything else! Xx

@HJen22 I can only imagine how tiring it is for trying and be so strong for 18 months! I hope this gives you some peace and excitement for what the future holds.

Thank you so much for your kind words. It’s so sad that there’s people out there, willing to abuse the system and hurt their children for their own gain. We do have a great solicitor though, expensive!! 😳 but so good.

I used today to clean the fridge & freezer. I organised it all then wrote out meal plans! I then made cookies & bread. Then cleaned the kitchen haha I felt better.

Just got a lovely family message that my little brother and his wife are expecting their 2nd!! I texted a huge congratulations, then I cried and now I feel bad. 😅 but I’m so so happy for them!!

How do they test your egg quality then? I think I need to research the process a little more.

You are doing all that you can and trying to make sure you have the best chances, remember that! You are doing amazingly well so make sure you remind yourself of that.

What have you been doing to up your omega and vit D? Is it supplements or diet? ☺️

Your weekend sounds so lovely! I hope you have a great time with your family.

I think I’m going to be boring and clean haha and possibly go for a walk. A have a few crafty bits to do but I’m waiting for some stuff to arrive in the post! ✨💕✨

@HopefulGlow yeah if anything I just want to relax more, I have been so stressed and emotional the last 18 months that it's really taken its toll! And that's not good physically or mentally. So I am enjoying the sessions with him.

I know, its such an awful awful thing to wish on someone, really paints a picture of how horrible she must be. She should be happy that her children like you, as you are a big part of their lives and their Dad's! No idea why some people just like to make life difficult for others. Chin up, you are a million times better a person than her and don't need her negativity bringing you down xx

I'm so glad your Manager was understanding, it really makes all the difference having a supportive boss, I hope having the few days off made you feel better xx

Yeah thats what my GP did, I got start of cycle bloods, OH had his SA then it was just a referral. So was out of their hands and into the clinic's and then we just had to wait to hear from them. Glad he was a nice Dr and sounds like he is doing all the right things and not protesting which is always a plus!!

I know, I am sad that the chances are so low (but i mean I'd guessed that, given we are at this stage and no whiff of a BFP) and that the quality of egg that I am ovulating with isn't likely to go onto pregnancy. The diagnosis I have isn't a great one, I mean number of eggs is a pretty big deal. But we can just work with what I have, hope that we get some good eggs collected and then fertilised. There are SO many hurdles to overcome in the stages of treatment that it scares me but I am going to really try and not worry about those things. And all this omega-3 and VitD that I am trying to increase should hopefully help with health of the eggs I do have.

This weekend we are seeing my sister, brother in law and nephews tomorrow to go to softplay near our house so that will be fun, then Sunday if the weather is ok going a hill walk with my friend and her kids and the dogs! What about you? xxxx

@HJen22 HAPPY FRIDAY!!

Like you said, it’s not expecting miracles but knowing you’re in good hands and that has a great affect on your mental health too.

I know, it’s really sad isn’t it. I can’t imagine ever wishing that upon someone. I think she is very selfish, childish and bitter. It wasn’t an amicable breakup and she hated the fact the children liked me too. I think it was hard for her to accept. BUT I keep trying to get rid of that negativity towards her, because that’s not doing me any good. I just keep hoping she will heal and move on. (Even though she’s got a long term partner but hey Ho!) 🙈

Awww that sounds so lovely, such a long Christmas break together. Oh gosh I could imagine home schooling was a challenge 😂 well done to you all for getting through it though 👏🏼

I’m feeling better today thanks, my manager was really supportive. I didn’t tell him about TTC, just all the other stresses and he thought it best I have a break. Which I’m so thankful for.

Yes it will be those bloods but I don’t really know much else. My doctor didn’t really say much and I felt like he was just ticking boxes in terms on fertility information. He was going from a 28 day cycle and comparing me to that 😂 so I was like hmmmmm…. He was nice though so I’m sure I can ask them more when I go in for bloods after my period.

I’m so glad your call went well and the doctor was so helpful. That’s fantastic news about it being a quick process after January! I think the fact you know the chances are low, will help with any pressure you put on yourself. You can take a step back and relax with it. I am really sorry that your chances are low though, I hope you came away from the appointment feeling positive still.

Great idea not to know your numbers too! I Google everything and that’s to my own detriment sometimes 😅 like you said, they are the experts and they will look after you 💕

Do you have any weekend plans? ✨💕✨

Oh and CD1 for me here! xx

Good morning ladies and happy Friday, how are you all? Anyone got any nice weekend plans?

@HopefulGlow I know, he is just the sweetest and I left feeling positive and relaxed and just at ease. I am not expecting any miracles but it's nice to know I am trying to take control of my mental health a bit more and really try to relax.

That is so awful :( I am so sorry you are going through that. Oh my god she didn't!!!! How could someone ever say that! She sounds like the most hideous person!!!!

Oh yeah she really is 12 going on 20 haha! She was up over christmas and ended up being here for 6 weeks instead of 2 due to covid, and home schooling was interesting haha! But I love her to bits! And always look forward to her coming up!

@AZ1992X how are the OPKs and ovulation going for you? I am sure if you've got some BD in you will have it covered :)

Oh i'm sorry you've had a rough few days and been off work too, how are you feeling now? That's great you are ovulating! Will it be day 2/3 bloods you have next? And did they have any idea how long it would take you to get in for your scan etc? Will that be with a fertility clinic or is it gynae down where you are?

We had our call this morning. It was the Dr who did my HyCosy/Internal scan so that was good. I was able to ask her questions I didn't at the time, and she explained the process and timescale and things. When I get my first appointment through in January it should all be quite quick after that, maybe a 2 week wait til the consultation, then a couple weeks for the nurse then would start the following cycle if it all lined up timewise. I asked about the chances of conceiving naturally and the chances are low so I am right not to be thinking too much about DTD as much as physically possible. I mean, its not a 0% so we will still ensure we do over FW but I'm not holding my breathe. She asked if I'd had the AMH results. I told her no, but I didn't want to know the figure. That will make me stress. She said that was very sensible, and that it matches up with my AFC and what they would expect. I am trusting that its in their capable hands and google will not help me at all if I know that number and search the shit out of it haha! Perhaps I have turned a slight corner, I learnt that the hard way though!

So until then I just need to try and remain positive, do what I am doing and try not to wish the days away until January xxx

@HJen22 I like him!! Anyone who can make you feel positive and happy in such a difficult situation, especially with needles sticking out of you haha is good & the positive energy you need!!

Thank you, it really has been so difficult. I try to stay calm but it’s just so hard sometimes. Especially because of how she’s treating the children, putting them through this. I feel awful for thinking she doesn’t deserve them. But it’s just frustrating. On top of that she basically cursed me haha said she hopes we never have kids…such a lovely person 😩

Oh wow that is a long journey!! Haha and girls are usually 12 going on 20, so it might be good you get to stay at home with the puppy 😂 that’s amazing your OH drives there and back in one day! Such a long day for him.

You will have to let me know how your call goes!

@AZ1992X glad to hear you’re feeling better. It definitely could be your cycles adjusting again. I know my mum said her cycles changed a little after his miscarriage too. I’m just so sorry you went through that.

I read you should get the Big O soon, any signs?

@Amy259 that Dr sounds good and it’s so funny you googled him haha did he just have a sexy voice? Haha 😂 I hope he answered all your questions and made you feel more at ease?

@User1400 sorry to jump on but I read about your OH trying the vape and not liking it? The second time I quit that was a life saver for me. I used to smoke menthol roll ups so menthol flavour liquid was perfect! I had to start at a high strength and work my way down but by bit. Maybe he needs to try a different strength or flavour? But you’re right, unless he’s ready he won’t be able to.

Sorry for the delay in my reply guys. I had a rough few days so ended up taking a few days off work too. Bloods came back as ovulating though, so need to book next bloods after my period and wait for my scan referral. Got my results in a text message haha so weird?…

Me and my OH are trying so hard to stay positive but it seems everyone we speak to is fed up and struggling with so many things. Beginning to think this year is cursed haha

BUT im determined to turn it around!! Even if it’s just my outlook on things!

Sweet dreams all ✨💕✨

@Amy259 hey 👋🏻 how are you doing today? Well I hope 🥰

@User1400 I know, I can imagine it's very frustrating and difficult to not get angry. And then anger just turns into upset. It's just something else that you have going on that could be cut out and not have you stressed. I really hope you can have a chat and come to an understanding and that he really soon makes an effort ❤️ it will all be worth it!

Oh my goodness. That's a very insensitive thing to say, I'm not sure why some don't realise that. I'm sorry, and you're right, that is not the stage you are at. There are many other options before that.

Haha I'm allowing a few things I know aren't "natural" cos I need some treats. I'd hoped I would shift some lbs but it just hadn't happened. But I'm not counting calories at all and I'm having all sorts of things I don't normally have. Doubled up on fish today, for lunch and tea so I'm really trying / trying to get it out the way this week 😂😂 and I've found out a chipper nearby does gluten free hahahaha so already thinking about that. Gotta have some sort of life right 😇

Our next call is tomorrow; a follow up from the HyCosy/internal and ivf referral. I don't really know what I'm allowed to ask at this stage so I'll just have to wait and see. They probably won't tell me a plan or anything and just maybe more about my factor and what that means xxx

Hi ladies!

@AZ1992X I couldn’t not google him, when he was giving it big licks about being this groundbreaking ivf doctor (he wasn’t lying…😂). Best of luck with your tww 🤞🏻🤞🏻

@User1400 ahh I’m sorry af seems to be coming, and I’m so sorry you’re going through this - tbh I’d kill him 😂 I’d be livid at him doing something that could hinder ttc (naturally or ivf). But on a serious note, and I am in no way condoning it (as I said.. murder), but does he have any other way of releasing the stress? Could it be all really getting to him too, and he thinks smoking is the only way to cope?

DH and I had a few big meltdowns/blowout like you’re describing too, I think it must be so common for us ladies to feel like we’re doing everything - supplements, tracking, symptom spotting, googling, calling drs etc. So you are not alone!! And then we ask them to take a supplement and they can’t manage it 🙃🙃 thankfully something clicked a few months ago here and it’s been so much better since. I think a big part of it was DH was really stressed about it too and his way of coping was to ignore and I thought he didn’t care, when he really did. Could it be similar with the smoking thing - thinking he’s not trying hard enough but actually smoking is his release and he’s super stressed?

@HJen22 you are super woman with this healthy eating mission - come and give me some of your discipline please!

@HJen22 It's just force of habit. He will always find a reason on why he hasn't managed to cut back 'today' and unfortunately until he's ready to give up the excuses, he's never going to quit. It just angers me that even this situation hasn't given him a bit of a shake to make a change. Hopefully you're right that once we talk it out it will give him that kick up the backside.

Yeah emotions are definitely high. I have never really been overly sensitive so I find all of this so hard to navigate, I just don't feel like myself at all. I've tried to talk to my mum but I just don't really feel like she understands, she asked if I had started looking into adoption and I was like hold the bus, we're nowhere near there yet!

OMG you doing extra good if ketchup is bending the rules 😱 eating a whole bar of chocolate is bending the rules for me 🤣. That's great news it's putting you in a positive mindset, that really is half the battle most of the time - we can be our own worst enemies! And if you loose a couple lbs along the way then hey who is complaining 🤗. Sounds like you've got it all down to a fine art!

Any weekend plans? When is your next call with the Drs again?

Xxx

@User1400 I know, you really have to want to quit yourself to really be able to try. It's a tough one cos habits are so hard to break. And I am sure the last thing he wants is to be told by a Dr that he would cause you delays. A vape is a great start though, and hopefully he can really begin to cut down. I wonder if there are certain things that trigger him or if its force of habit? My OH tried to drink lots of water and would get up for a drink in the times he'd normally smoke, or have chewing gum, so that he was replacing smoking with something else.

Oh my OH still enjoys many a beer without me haha, I don't mind as it's not like he gets drunk. He goes to the football as well when there are home games so he has his day out and drinks then so I don't feel so bad that I am boring company for him most of the time haha!

It really does suck when TTC is hard enough without the relationship strain too! It really just does make it even more upsetting and shitty. I think because emotions are high we can feel more sensitive. However, I am super oversensitive anyway and was even before TTC haha.

Don't be silly, it's good to get it out. We all need to! Yeah wait until you are feeling a little better and just tell him how you feel, I think when he realises just how important it is, it might give him a little kick up the butt :)

I am trying my hardest! I mean I am bending some rules like I had tomato sauce the other day, and I have mayo but I'm like, I am doing everything else major I need to, taking all my vitamins religiously etc and really trying with the omega 3 thing! I do feel better, I think most days its giving me a more positive mindset - although there are some days I am mega moody and can't be arsed and am just like WHY am I having to do this, its so unfair etc etc. So the little things like allowing vegan/dairy free chocolate, having organic normal potatoes and not just bloody baby potatoes, and having GF fish and chips last weekend are keeping me sane and not making me want to totally throw the towel in. It's for the forseeable really! I am to stick with GF and Dairy Free at least until I next talk to her on the 28th! I am for sure having much more regular bowel movements (TMI sorry) so that must be a good thing. I mean i'd like to be shifting a few lbs whilst I was at it, which hasn't really happened but weight loss isn't the end goal for once (or really needed i guess, but I def would like to lose a bit) xxx

@HJen22 That is good he gave up though, it is all to easy to reach for a beer and a cig after a long days work, so it shows he is committed.

My OH bought a vape (after weeks of me pestering) as a bit of a stop gap to help him quit and he has given up on it already. I was feeling positive seeing him using the vape and limiting the number of cigs but it has barely lasted any time at all and has went straight back to full time smoking (my point again, how exactly is that him 'trying'!).

I researched some books/podcasts to help him quit but I don't see the point in buying him anything as until he is ready to quit, nothing will work, I can't help him if he is not going to help himself.

Part of me just wants to leave him to it, and have a Dr tell him we're not being referred because of him. Obviously I hope it doesn't get to that stage, but it just feels like that's where we're going.

What really gets to me is that we never normally argue, and I feel like it's unfair that we are even having TTC issues and then having those issues interfere with our relationship.

Sorry, that's me and my moans finished! I will have a talk with him, when I am feeling a little less teary!

Wow you are super on the ball with your diet! Are you feeling better for it in general, unrelated to TTC? Totally agree everything is worth a try! It's nice to have something keeping you focused too. How long are you on the plan with the nutritionist for? Xx

@User1400 he actually managed easier than I thought he would, but I had given him plenty warning. And to be fair, he hadn't smoked all that long. He just kinda ended up doing it more over lockdown and with work stress. But I can imagine it's a lot harder if you have been doing it all of your adult life. He also knew how many sacrifices i was making. Could he perhaps try some nicotine replacement just now? I do know that even that you have to be off of. But time wise if you were referred, you have some extra time seeing as the wait is a wee while.

I know what you mean, I had many a breakdown and felt like I was misunderstood and not getting listened to. It's a really horrible feeling when you are getting to the end of your tether. If you are worried about it coming to blows and an argument maybe you could write him a letter? Oh or get him to listen to some hypnotherapy! There are some on youtube, my BF bought one online actually by the woman I seen and he listened to it, maybe it was that that made him stop!!

Try not to just assume its you, so easy to say and I was exactly the same, but there totally could also be nothing on your side either and it's just been a matter of biology and that 30% chance of happening just not happened yet xx

I had some blood work back from one of the sets of tests the Nutritionist organised (there were SO many tests, all sorts of things), lots at optimal or normal, but very low Omega 3 which is super important for egg health so what she suspected, I am hoping that the fish oil i've been taking the last few weeks from her along with eating fish, flaxseed and walnuts will help that. She said it takes 3 months to make new eggs so we are on the right track. Also low in Vitamin D even though I had been taking a supplement (turned out a childs dose ha it did not say that on the packaging!!) so i've to take a daily spray of that! I feel good knowing I am doing this to try and really help egg health. Anything is worth a try! Still waiting on the hormone test results to come back and will have another call with her at the end of October to chat about them.

xxx

@HJen22 How did your OH take to stopping cigarettes?

I reminded him (for the fourth day in a row) that he needs to cut back and I added in that we won’t get treatment if he doesn’t stop and again he just snapped that I don’t need to remind him and that he is trying. I would of liked to snapped back and asked exactly how he was trying (seeing he is smoking the exact same amount as he always has) but I am far too emotional to get into a tit for tat and would of ended up crying. But I know that is where it is headed, me having (another) complete meltdown. Why does it always have to get to that stage before he takes any notice? I couldn’t count the number of times I have had a breakdown about how I feel unsupported and that everything is on my shoulders.

It’s always better after we have these blow outs and you’re right that we need to have a chat but I just hate how it feels like I need to have a complete breakdown before he actually starts listening (and then we just repeat the cycle!).

Another thing that is annoying me is that he is trying to smoke out of my eye line, squeezing a cigarette in when he thinks I’m not looking. It makes me feel like the bad cop, It’s not ME who has told him to stop smoking, it’s the Dr! Whether I know how many cigs he’s having or not, the blood test won’t lie!

Yeah he has had SA and all came back clear, which makes me think there definitely must be an issue with me .

Xxxxx

@AZ1992X oh hoopefully you ovulate soon and then the bloods will be timed nicely next week. How are the OPKs looking? And the BD?

@User1400 oh I'm sorry, AF is on the way for me too, app predicting today but who knows seeing as I didn't track. Hopefully she stays away for you, you never know!! Not out until she does xxx

Yeah try and get a cancellation and I am sure it will all fit in! So annoying isn't it though! I'm sorry you are having a hard time with OHs smoking. I was a bit of a social smoker before when having drinks, but I stopped as soon as we started TTC. My OH smoked too and I forced him to stop. I know how hard it is when its something you can't control, we do all these things from our side that we have control over and its just an added stress to be worrying about what he could be doing to help too. Remind me, has he had SA?

Sorry that you are going through this and feeling overwhelmed :( perhaps try and tell him how you are feeling, just that you are worried and feeling overwhelmed and that you just want for you both to be in the best health you can be xxx

Hi ladies, I think AF is on her way today as a bit of light blood when wiping. Having my usual CD1 pity party, wondering if this is ever going to happen for us 😭. Feeling frustrated that I could of just gone ahead with my initial HyCosy date, and now this will make it touch and go for my new HyCosy date 😡. I'll maybe wait until AF goes and see if they have any cancellations.

As I mentioned before, my OH is trying to quit smoking. I felt like he was really on board after our fertility call, but over the last couple of days I can tell he is making no effort to cut back at all. I keep gently reminding him and he keeps snapping at me that he is trying. I understand it's difficult for him as a long (long long!) time smoker, but it's literally all he has been asked to do, and he's not even trying! It feels like yet another thing I've got to keep an eye on because I can't trust him to do this one thing. I can tell we are in for another blow out very soon, given how over whelmed I am feeling even writing this post 😭. I know it's not all of his fault but if we do end up going down the IVF route (which is where I feel we are going), we will not get a referral because of him. I just don't know what to do I feel like I am at the end of my tether xx

@Amy259 I’m glad your appointment went well, sorry you’ve got to have another hycosy though.
Hope you’re doing ok.

Laughing at you googling him though 😂😂!

My 21 day bloods was cancelled which is probably a good thing due to me ovulating later so they moved to next week. Should hopefully ovulate today so will just be a waiting game.

@Amy259 yeah it's so easy to compare isn't it. You are so right, we're all in this together ❤️ sometimes knowing facts can just be too stressful. And I think Dr's are aware we all love a google! Google is the worst too!

Aw I'm so glad, it really makes a real difference when it's someone lovely! Such a hard thing to talk about and when they make you feel comfortable it just makes it that little bit easier. I really hope that it does happen for you before then 🥰 I know all the waiting is so so hard though xx

@HJen22 they said on the podcast I listen to and I didn’t really think much at the time but there’s definitely truth in comparison being a real added unnecessary stress. We’re all in the same boat supporting each other, and I think knowing anyone else’s numbers (never mind my own!) could stress me more, especially going forward.
100% you’re right, they’ll tell you what and when you need to know ♥️

Yeah it was a lovely professor from Glasgow Royal, I definitely already feel like I’d be in safe hands if we ended up under his care. Yeah they’ll do the internal and hycosy again, probably Jan-Feb, and he said if that’s all clear I’d hear from them around April to add us to the IVF list - he then said the standard “but hopefully it’ll happen in the meantime” line every doctor seems to say at this point! In my head I was like mhmm see you April buddy 👋🏻😂 xx

@Amy259 aw bless thank you ❤️ yeah they haven't told me any number and they might not bother and as you say, it's for later on. I know what you mean and I'm the same; in the book I read it said about maybe not finding out numbers as it can panic / worry you, and lead to all sorts of googling. So I think if they don't tell me, I'll not ask. It was mentioned on a letter I received and just said it would be discussed at another appointment. I don't want to worry about it any more than all the other parts I'll worry about!

This was with your fertility clinic the call today wasn't it? Will they do another internal scan too?

Xx

@HJen22 I’m not sure if this helps or not (I’m hopeful it does or I wouldn’t say it!) but he told me on the phone that if I do need IVF and they check my AMH, the value alone doesn’t determine IVF success rate - it’s all about the protocol and what happens after that. He was quite dismissive of AMH as an indicator of success, and made certain I understood that it was information needed to help doctors decide which protocols to use rather than as a predictor for outcome. So I think it sounds like you’re right not to stress about that specific number too much ♥️

I was thinking about this the other day weirdly - if I’d want to share any numbers/values I’m ever told in future, because I know how triggering I find it when it’s me. I’m straight to google or thinking I’m not good enough or whatever if someone has higher/more/less/whatever. I can imagine at something like an egg retrieval, being delighted with 7 and hearing someone else got 12 can’t be nice! Maybe I’m just overthinking it and actually it’s totally fine for everyone else 😂

Hi ladies 👋🏻

Aw that's great @AZ1992X so you should be ovulating soon? I'm glad that the OPKs have continued to rise for you!

I'm glad your chat went well @Amy259 he sounds lovely! Shame he isn't a babe though haha. Sorry you've to get another HyCosy 😞 in my case it didn't speed up IVF so to speak, I got the bloods done when the internal scan showed low follicles and therefore low ovarian reserve. It's to give further info on that for me. I've not had the results yet but yeah, they'll determine the egg reserve better and therefore the likelihood of IVF being worthwhile / the protocol. This gives me the absolute fear so I'm trying not to think about it and hoping it's not horrendous or they'd have told me by now. But who knows! I don't think I'd have had it done there and then otherwise.

I hope everyone is doing well ❤️ xxx

@AZ1992X appointment was fine, he had the best, most relaxing voice. I was fully convinced he’d be an absolute babe then was a little disappointed when I googled him and found his Twitter 😂 he’s pretty big time though, so that was reassuring.

Hycosy referral (again 🤢) in 4 months. I asked him about AMH because it’s the one thing I haven’t had checked and was curious if he’d check it.. his unexpected response was “that’s actually my test, I discovered the marker. Before Covid I travelled the world lecturing on it, now I’m stuck in my study just telling the walls” alright, big shot!

Apparently testing it wouldn’t change anything for me, he said it’s primary use is to determine how you’ll respond to IVF and what protocol to use, but that it wouldn’t move things faster than the 2 year mark for me even if it was low. (Which is weird given @HJen22’s experience in it speeding up ivf?) I just took his word for it given his CV 😂

That’s great news, you must be so relieved! So good getting that positive opk and knowing all systems are go! ♥️