Trying to conceive over 40

@Mattieandmummy I don’t think I even knew what ewcm was until the last 6 months 🤣 I literally had no idea how my cycles worked before ttc this time. But I would expect you’re right that there is less of it the older we get…..

Just wondering which type of early pregnancy tests anyone would recommend? Or are they all the same? I don’t usually test early but I have my second vaccine scheduled for Friday and it’ll be a couple of days before my period is due and I would rather be confident I’m not pregnant when I have it than worry about it. Thanks!

@Catconfusion I was told that a gynae referal is for Fertility too so who knows 🤷🏼‍♀️

@Littlemiss40andfabulous that's great that your scan is soon so exciting!

@Honey2 good thanks- yes I have it in 2 weeks time!!!!!!!

@Littlemiss40andfabulous how are you doing? You must be coming up for your 12 week scan soon? Exciting!!!

@Mattieandmummy I definitely have less ecwm now I'm in my 40's (41 and 4 months now). I found it a little demoralising at first and wanted to keep reassuring DH it wasn't him! We were using lubricant but only swapped to a sperm friendly one after reading about them on here, a few months before getting my current bfp.

@Marvellouslymadmum I think it’s because of my long cycles. The monitoring for Clomid comes from the fertility clinic not Gynae. The investigations for the miscarriages come from gynae. I was on a path for fertility services before I had Ds to get Clomid to sort my cycles out so I guess that’s why we’re going that route again. Xx

@Catconfusion that's odd I've been referred to gynae for infertility 🤔 maybe it's different in different areas. Great that both of yours are getting sorted though sometimes it feels like they keep telling you that your age is a bad thing but it doesn't mean they're in any more of a hurry to help!
@Geriatric1234 yes I've spoken about ewcm I don't seem to get it every month so I've been taking epo and going to try grapefruit juice too and see if that helps. I use the fertility lube too @Mattieandmummy

@Mattieandmummy I definitely find I have less ewcm now.. I think it is age related. I think it also can be related to the types food you eat and your ph down there. Apparently using a sperm friendly lubricant like concieve plus can help.

@Mattieandmummy Not a numpty at all! I booked a private progesterone test on a whim after a short cycle (turned out it was the vaccine) all because I was freaking out I’d hit peri-menopause!

Re: EWCM Hmmm, not sure about that one. I think it’s been discussed on here before… was it you @Marvellouslymadmum?

@Catconfusion I think the time pressure is so, SO stressful. But on the over 35s thread the women feel that pressure the same when they’re only 36/37 which feels so young to me now! So I just keep thinking “anything’s possible”. But at the same time I feel stressed to take a paracetamol or have a wine because then I blame that for AF appearing! TTC is crazy!!

I am now always going to test early. Tried it this month and it made life soooo much easier. Because I ovulate so early (usually Cd12) my tww can be more of a 2.5-3WW which I’ve been finding socially limiting. At least if I test from 11/12 dpo I get an extra week of normality back. It was DH’s idea but I think he’s spot on on this one!

@Geriatric1234 I know, I know. I'm such a numpty.

But this does lead me on to another question, does everyone find they have less ewcm post 40. The last time I was actually ovulating was pre DD at 37 and I know I had loads then, but now there's really not much and only for one day before turning so thin it's just like slightly slippery water. I know at 37 I had loads but just for one day .....

I really feel like a crazy person with all this TTC stuff sometimes

@Mattieandmummy oh yay!!! Ya seeeeee!! Xxx

@Marvellouslymadmum it is. I’ve certainly done my fair share of it. I think for me it’s because it feels like my body is letting me down with the losses and my irregular cycles. All things I can’t do much about. I just spoke to the doctor and my fertility referral has gone off. It was a different doctor and he was confused as to why I hadn’t been offered a gynae referral so he’s put that through as I’ve had three losses. He thinks the fertility one will be quick but gynae could be a few months. It’s so frustrating at our age isn’t it waiting when fertility declines so rapidly. Xx

Oh thank God, a flashing smiley face this morning. Not that I've been up all night worrying about or anything.

@Catconfusion sometimes it's just hard not to blame yourself isn't it! Did you call about your consultant appointment?

@Mattieandmummy if you've stopped taking the epo you should be ok, that was a very high dose but hopefully if it does delay it won't be busy much

That's what part of my brain and my DH is saying. Or it might just be a month where I wasn't going to ovulate, after all that happens to everyone from time to time.

But the other part of my brain is saying but epo has estrogen in it and you need low estrogen to stimulate FSH and then folicles to grow. Sigh.

Really hope I have an estrogen surge tomorrow.

@Mattieandmummy no - I don’t think you’ve messed anything up!! These things can move around a little each month, so really don’t worry! Xx

Congratulations everyone who has had a positive! I missed the last few as promised DH I would stop using Mumsnet quite so much 🙄

I am having a panic that I have done something very stupid and I wanted to see what you all thought.

My cycles were just getting back to normal after stopping bfing my DD and in a bid to increase cervical mucus I followed the advice on cervical mucus.org which says take 3 to 4 1500mg a day of evening primrose oil tablets. I did that for 3 days from day three I think then researched on Mumsnet, had a panic attack as I realised I was taking far too much and epo can also delay ovulation. Stopped taking it immediately.

So I use clearblue ovulation tests that give you estrogen surges and lh surges and so far I have had an estrogen surge on day 10 and lh surge on day 14 or 15. Today is day 11 and no estrogen surge. Have I totally messed up my cycle? What do you think?

I've messed it up haven't I

thanks, @October1979, today it ticked the ovulation, so i guess it just takes a bit longer than i was expecting...! I might start trying OPKs as well just to see if it's consistent. esp because my temperature seems to start rising about a week before Ava is predicting my ovulation. thank you!! xx

Like @Lastyearttc I’ve just gotten hold of the femometer app and opks and already feel like I’m going to be more knowledgeable about what’s happening in my body as a result so thanks for the recommendations! Was using one step and ovia app before and found neither very helpful and already more impressed by femometer - you ladies are such a great source of info for TTC virgins lol - thank you x

@Marvellouslymadmum try not to blame yourself. It’s such an intricate process. The nhs doesn’t test for sperm dna fragmentation so although sperm look healthy, the dna within can be damaged. It’s a bit like how our eggs can be damaged due to age. My DHs SA came back normal too thank goodness. I still think that’s a good sign on the whole. It’s totally possible for the wrong sperm to fertilise the egg. Older men and younger women have more miscarriages so the man plays a part.

I think it can just take a bit of time and luck. Not necessarily anything wrong. Good you have a referral in August. I’m going to call on Monday about ours as all the tests are done. I just feel gutted at the moment but it’ll be ok. Xx

@Catconfusion I totally understand, I feel like the fact it's not happening for us is definitely down to me, i was fine when I had my children years ago and now when I have managed to get pg it's ended in mc my oh's sa came back really good which I know is a good thing but doesn't make me feel any better! I just have to hope that his swimmers weren't that great before now as he'd been smoking and that's why no luck along with my issues so now we have more hope and a fertility referral in august to cling on to! Have you heard anything about when your referral will be yet?

@99pctpractice I can't offer much advice I'm afraid as I don't use an Ava

@99pctpractice I don’t have Ava so I’m not sure but it could be the lack of sleep. It might be worth contacting them and seeing what they think. Hopefully there is a helpline. Glad you’re enjoying the thread. Xx

@Marvellouslymadmum do you know what, it really gets me down. It’s always felt like my body is failing me and after 5 losses now, two before ds and three after, I feel quite disheartened. I’m going to call the Gp on Monday and chase the referral. Hoping we can get seen soon. Xx