TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!

@SparrowMaiden @bea19 it’s a tough one, if I hadn’t of got this new job and had fallen pregnant in my current role I would have only received statutory maternity anyway!

I also don’t want to be that person who walks into a new role and gets pregnant straight away.

I think we’ll stop preventing after 3 months or so of me starting my new role, but won’t start actively trying until after the 6 month mark. Kind of leave it to fate!

Frustrating that we need to think of things like this as women!

@Aila1994 congratulations on your dream job! What amazing news. Really tough on the ttc question though. I agree with @SparrowMaiden though and 25 weeks full pay sounds like pretty impressive mat pay (for the UK anyway…)

Hi @Aila1994 - congratulations on your amazing new job!

I guess realistically it comes down to money. If you can comfortably afford to live and care for a baby on statutory maternity pay, then I would say carry on ttc. You never know what's going to happen and you could be trying for 6 months before conceiving anyway. However, if not having that extra money is going to throw you into a difficult situation financially then it isn't worth the risk, and I would say wait. I was incredibly lucky first time around - I had much fewer outgoings than I do now, so I had plenty of spare cash when on mat leave despite pretty rubbish mat pay from my former job. This time I get much better mat pay, but if I didn't I would be questioning if I could afford another baby at all because my outgoings are so much higher (nursery fees are killer, and we have a bigger mortgage now). I'd also say to make sure you consider money that you'll need beyond the basics (nappies etc). It can be really lonely being a new mum so just having enough money to go for a coffee or go to a baby class (if these things continue to be possible, of course!) is really important. Anyway. It's a tough one and I know the waiting is awful but you should should honest with yourself about what life would be like in either situation.

Hi everyone!

It’s been a while since I’ve commented, life has been crazy busy. I ended up getting my dream job and finish up my current position in 3 weeks.

This new job comes with much better benefits (main emphasis on the maternity), in that they offer 25 weeks full pay then the rest statutory if you’ve been with the company 6 months by the time you conceive.

My only worry is that we’ve already tried for 4 months with no luck (have taken a couple months off due to job interviews and overall uncertainty when it comes to the job front).

If You found yourself in the same scenario, would you wait the 6 months, or just go for it and forego the enhanced maternity pay?

I’ve only just turned 27, so feel I have the time, but also feel so ready for our rainbow baba 🌈!

@SparrowMaiden to be fair you have much better willpower than me because I would be testing every day!! Wishing you the very best of luck xx

OK so I have promised myself I'm not going to do the digital until Sunday so I give myself the best chance of not being upset by seeing "not pregnant" but I'm also super impatient!! Please help me not test tomorrow!! (AF due tomorrow so won't be officially late until Sunday)

@SparrowMaiden 🥳 congrats! Will keep everything crossed for you my love x

@bea19 sorry to hear about your sad news, hope you're doing ok.
I am currently on CD16 & waiting for positive OPK, I usually ovulate around CD17 so I'm hoping it's soon, this is the first proper month ttc after my mc at end of May!
Good luck to those in the TTW, hope some BFP's are on the way Xx

Thanks for your kind words ladies. @SparrowMaiden congratulations!!

Eeek exciting @SparrowMaiden! Keeping everything crossed for you.

@Flopsy88 Thank you! 11dpo... due on on Saturday I think.... I'm so scared it's not going to stick again. I am going to do a digital test at the weekend but I'm already anxious about it.

@SparrowMaiden That is definitely a line!!!! How many dpo are you?? It's always thinner than the control line until a while after your period is due. Congratulations!!!

Omg does this look like a line to you? Came up within 3 minutes and is definitely pink but also a bit thinner than the control... trying not to get my hopes up as it is so very early...

@bea19 I'm so sorry love, that is so cruel. I hope you're ok xx

Im so sorry to hear that @bea19 ! Hope ur ok x

@bea19 ah I'm really sorry, that's beyond rubbish. This whole TTC thing can be so unfair!

Aunt flow decided to show up today 😭 ! Was a relief thought tbh as can get cracking onto next month ! Congrats anyone u had BFP!
Does anyone know what day you should start testing ovulation from the first day of your period is it day 8 , someone said day 10 my app says 11! So confused 🤔

@bea19 so sorry to hear this. Be kind to yourself and also be as sad as you want - don't let anyone tell you it's "just one of those things" - it's not. It is awful, it is heartbreaking, and it shouldn't happen. Also even though the current guidance is 3 consecutive miscarriages before treatment, it might be worth telling your GP to see if there's anything they can do at this stage. Some are more supportive than others about this stuff.

My temp came back up over the last two days... trying not to get my hopes up... might test tomorrow, haven't decided if I can bear it or not.

Hi ladies,

Sorry to hear your temp is dropping @SparrowMaiden. fingers crossed it was just an implantation dip.

Glad you’re doing well and have a scan booked @Lowkeyloopy.

I was hoping to be sharing good news today as I got a very faint positive at 10DPO, a faint one at 12DPO (but even my DH could see it) and a decent BFP when AF was due 5 days ago. Although the line on my third test wasn’t as dark a line as I had been expecting, I initially put it down to it being a different brand of test, but this morning I took a digital test to see if it would be showing 2-3 rather than 1-2 and it said not pregnant! I started bleeding this afternoon…. I’m completely gutted. I had been feeling much less anxious than I had expected and now just can’t believe I’m having consecutive miscarriages.

Hi everyone, hope you've had nice weekends.

@TBF29 I was definitely more superstitious when pregnant with my dd, and there were tonnes of magpies where I used to live so I was always counting them!! I had never heard the idea of it being someone watching over you @CMcA21 but that's a lovely thought and much more reassuring!! I used to just say "Good morning, Mr Magpie" to all of them which I was told was how you stopped the bad luck!! So silly isn't it, I am not at all superstitious normally!!! Having said that my aunt and uncle brought me these little carvings back from a trip to Uganda and they are apparently fertility symbols, so I have had them by my bed since ttc last time!! And today in a moment of madness I just held one against my belly and wished really hard 🤣 that makes me sound so mental...

Pretty sure I'm out again this cycle, only 8dpo but temps already started dropping. If they aren't back up again tomorrow then it's definitely not an extended implantation dip and just and irritatingly slow drop back before AF. Gargh.

@CocoLady My periods didn't go back to normal following my MC. The month following it I had a 33 day cycle I think, when I've always had 28 day cycles. According to my CB digital j did ovulate but didn't get a BFP. I conceived the following month but didn't ovulate until CD25, so that was a long cycle too. I get how frustrating it must be. Have you been using OPK's? If your not ovulating maybe it's worth a chat with your GP? Good luck!

@Scoaf the month I conceived I didn't rush to the toilet after DTD and put my legs up on the bed rest. I also used cheap OPK's instead of CB digital and tracked my BBT each morning. I done that all month until I took pregnancy tests. My fingers are crossed for you!

Hi Ladies...
I hope you dont mind me commenting?
I commented earlier on in the thread but have just been following all your journeys since from the sidelines.
Congratulations to all the BFPs, its so lovely to see some postive stories. Just wondering if anybody did anything differently the month they conceived?
I have just got AF again, been trying again since our 2nd Miscarriage in January but still no BFP.. im honestly beginning to loose hope.
It feels like there are pregnancy announcements everywhere at the minute and its becoming unbearable.
I have been referred to my local Gynaecology department due to being 35 and i have an appointment next week and im pretty worried about it.
My periods have always been pretty painful but only on day 1 and i went on the pill as a teenager due to fainting on the first day of my period nearly every month. Since my 2nd Miscarriage they have been a bit all over the place from 28-35 days. But only lasting about 5 days and i dont have excessive bleeding. Im not sure if this is all normal or if i should be worried about endometriosis.or something else... bloody google makes you overthink everthing. 😏
Sorry for the rant and im not really sure what i am asking tbh....but weve not told anyone so ive been holding it all in 🙈
Thanks for reading xx

How's everyone Saturday going ? Jus a quick question if anyone can help after a miscarriage how long did your periods get back to 'normal' and how long did it take
You to ovulate ?
I bled for 3 months after my miscarriage was on the depo straight after and now it's been nearly 3 months of periods all over the shop harder to track my ovulation! So
Disheartening x
Hope everyone's well ? X

@TBF29 I've always been superstitious about certain things. That's lovely about your twins, I definitely believe in robins and signs etc. @CMcA21 I definitely believe that's a loved one reaching out! The day before I had my DS we still couldn't think of a name and all of a sudden I knew what it was, like I was certain of it. Someone told me that when that happens it's a loved one putting the idea in your head. It's always made me love his name even more. I hope it happens again for this one, as I've got no clue on names!

@Lowkeyloopy Glad you're doing ok! A scan at 8 weeks sounds really sensible and I'm sure be really reassuring. I keep panicking about my symptoms too. I worry that I'm just imagining them but then other days I'm sure they're there. I feel like I won't be able to hide my pregnancy for much longer. I'm normally really sensible with my food but I can't stop eating and piling on the weight. I've already had to buy more clothes! Hopefully I can tell family after my scan next week.

@CMcA21 that is a lovely story, tinged with sadness. I have to admit that I always search for a 2nd magpie whenever I see one on it's own but from now on I won't mind the single ones!!

I agree that it's nice to search out things that bring you comfort so I'll carry on looking out for my robins even if my husband thinks I'm bonkers every time I go 'hi little robin' when we're out walking!!