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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!

641 replies

Lowkeyloopy · 06/04/2021 12:49

Hi all!

I know there are several threads dedicated to this topic, which I've lurked on for several weeks without saying anything, but some threads (sadly) have so many people on them that it can be a bit hard to follow, or it feels awkward to jump into the middle of a conversation between people who have been chatting for a while. Does anyone fancy joining me on a new thread?

My story: 33, TTC baby #1, conceived first cycle in Feb, but had a MC at 6 weeks in early March. Absolutely awful, as everyone knows, and I was in a rubbish place mentally for a few weeks, but I've also counted my blessings - it was early, I needed no medical intervention and at least I know I can conceive. Also AF has returned today - 29 days after first day of my MC. I usually have a 28-29 day cycle so am so grateful that my body seems to be getting with the programme again.

So CD1 for me, and I'll be TTC this month and back to tracking - BBT from tomorrow, OPKs from CD 11, still taking my Pregnacare and trying to keep exercising and eating healthily!

Would anyone like to join me if they're going through something similar? How have you been coping since your MC? What's on your TTC to-do list?! (Other than the obvious..!)

Baby dust to all xx

OP posts:
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Aila1994 · 23/04/2021 08:40

@Lowkeyloopy and honestly, I’m clueless about when I actually ovulate, because I don’t temp!

I use OPK’s, but every month without fail get 3 days of strong positives, so I’m never actually 100% sure of ovulation day! I just take it as the day after my strongest peak (even though sometimes it can be hard to tell)

Aila1994 · 23/04/2021 08:37

@Lowkeyloopy AF is due for me today. Haven’t been having my usual cramps at all, but last night for about an hour - 2 hours I started cramping really bad.

That’s gone now and I feel pretty normal again. IC Tests are still negative this morning and I’m 11dpo, so would expect something.

Will test with a FRER in the morning if AF still hasn’t showed! 🤞

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 23/04/2021 08:09

@ShoesEverywhere Congratulations! Fingers crossed for a sticky bean! Have you taken any more tests?

@Madeoftea I hope you have a lovely time at the seaside this weekend! We’ve done the same thing for a long weekend and it’s so good to get away and have some fresh air.

@Aila1994 @justwant2beamum @ItsMeantToBe How are you ladies later in your TWW doing? Any more testing? Hope everyone is staying sane!

@lavenderlilaclily you are very welcome to the thread and I’m so sorry for your loss and that you had to go through that horrific experience. I’m so sure your rainbow baby and so much happiness is just around the corner for you Flowers. I hope that cramping is implantation!

@SparrowMaiden welcome to the thread and I’m so sorry about your CP - definitely don’t feel silly at all - getting those two lines is a joyful thing. We can never control what happens afterwards but it’s still something that was right to celebrate. Good thinking about taking stress out of it - I read so many stories about women who are all “I finally relaxed and that’s when it happened!” For now the temping and OPKs doesn’t feel too stressful for me - I like the certainty it gives me, but I may change my tune in a few months...

Welcome @Scoaf and I’m so sorry you’ve been through this twice now. It’s so random and cruel. Remember your past doesn’t dictate your future with TTC, so your rainbow will come along soon. Where are you in your cycle now?

@Flopsy88 Good luck with your Med diet! Such a good idea - I guess the food we put in our body is the biggest thing we can do to alter our health! Since around the time lockdown started last year I’ve been nearly completely veggie - not for fertility really, but the extra energy (and clearer skin) I’ve had had been great! I do wonder if it was a factor in me getting (briefly..) PG first cycle TTC.

@Mrsmujic Good news on your flashing smiley! I understand the relief that your body is getting back on track! Hope you’ve a fun few days..!

@ItsMeantToBe - ooh good question. I don’t think I could keep it a surprise from my DP because I can’t keep anything to myself..! I think I’m going to wait as long as possible to test because I don’t want to put myself through the pain of a CP so soon after the MC (or ever really!). My AF is normally so regular that if it’s late that will be a very good sign. My DP will probably start casually enquiring about my AF when he knows it’s been around 2 weeks since all the DTD. I might tell my mum and best friend if we get past 7 weeks, but that might be it until 12 weeks.

So my FF chart is suggesting I’m 4DPO today! Though I’m not sure because I think my temping has been unreliable recently, partic CD14 and CD15. The temp jump is so small! Plus it’s saying O was the same day I got my peak which was in the evening! Seems too rapid. Checked chart for the month I conceived and it also said O was the day I got my peak - at least that peak was in the morning though so maybe O could’ve been in the evening! What do you guys think? I’m kicking myself for not DTD on CD13! (This is me not stressing about temping, haha)

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!
OP posts:
Scoaf · 22/04/2021 21:27

Hi Ladies..
I hope you dont mind me joining?
So sorry we are all in this position, but grateful to speak to people who know how i feel.
Me and my OH started trying in September and we couldn't believe our luck to fall straight away, but 1 week later i started bleeding and i miscarried naturally at 5+2. We were devasted. You never think it will happen to you.
We started trying again and in December, AF was late so we did a test but it was negative. But after another 6 days and still no AF i did another test and got another BFP. I was petrified and booked a private early scan for 7weeks but on the day of the scan i started bleeding heavily and miscarried naturally again. That was in January and weve been trying again since then. Every month is just so hard when AF arrives again. Weve not told any family or friends so its nice to speak to other people and let it all out. X

ItsMeantToBe · 22/04/2021 20:15

@Flopsy88 a diet without pizza is out of the question for me, ha.

My TWW is going so slow. I feel like I'm on day 100 (actually 8DPO). I normally have more signs of AF by now and I've been wanting nice fresh food for the past few days like salads, which I craved last time I was pregnant so I'm taking that as a good sign.

@Mrsmujic Great news! Fingers crossed for you.

@Aila1994 exciting! Good luck.

Has anyone thought of how they will tell their partner this time? Last time he was with me and read the result of the test to me but I want it to be a surprise this time. I'm also thinking I might test for a few days first before telling him, to make sure the line is getting darker. I'm not telling friends and family until I've had a scan, I hated breaking the bad news to them after my MC.

lavenderlilaclily · 22/04/2021 12:42

thanks everyone for kind messages 💕

congrats @ShoesEverywhere!!!

@Flopsy88 feels very unfair that a Mediterranean diet doesn't include pizza!! Maybe just a bit of pizza?

I'm also trying to do a healthy fertility diet at the moment, just about to make a beetroot and mackerel salad which I am not very excited about...I just want to be eating big bowls of pasta all the time.

@Aila1994 keeping fingers crossed for you! 10dpo is still pretty early and ICs aren't the most sensitive. And it's a good sign that AF cramps haven't started! Try again at 12dpo :)

I'm currently 7dpo I think and I'm having some light cramping. I had cramping with my last bfp, so I think the cramping doesn't mean I'm out, but equally doesn't mean I'm in with any chance at all either.

Aila1994 · 22/04/2021 11:48

Hi ladies! 10dpo today and a BFN on an IC. Felt around for my cervix today and (TMI) could fit my full middle finger in before reaching my cervix. (Which was really soft, apparently a good sign, but who knows)

I’m due AF tomorrow, and feel like my cramps should have well and truly started up by now, but they haven’t! So I’m holding out a bit of hope still, but not much!

Anyone else been testing?

Mrsmujic · 22/04/2021 11:00

Morning girls, I hope you're all doing well? A big hello to any newbies too, sorry you are all here after such sad news but it seems a very supportive thread, so welcome!

An update from me.. I've finally got a flashing smiley opk yesterday, so I'm feeling much better that my body is getting back on track! I'm cd19 today and usually have longer cycles. It's interesting that my Flo app says I ovulated yesterday even though going by OPKs I didn't! I did have some ewcm but I think I get this in the lead up.. it would make sense for it to be there fw. I only started using CB Digi last month and got a BFP (rest of the time it was mainly flo app and cheap opk) so fingers crossed I'm lucky again this month!

Good luck to you all, I hope it's another lucky thread xx

Flopsy88 · 22/04/2021 10:41

Morning ladies! How is everyone doing? I'm on CD6 so will start using OPKs tomorrow I think. I'm currently putting all my energy into following a mediterranean diet (sadly this not include pizza?!? 😭) I've listened to loads of fertility podcasts and and apparently there's a lot of research to show it improves egg quality. It feels healthier than obsessing over my charts and weeing on sticks but I'm sure that will come next week.

@lavenderlilaclily I'm so sorry for your loss, you must be devastated. I hope have lots of support and you're taking care of yourself xx

Congratulations @ShoesEverywhere !! Wonderful news. It gives me so much hope to see these BFPs. How are you feeling?

Sorry to hear about your chemical @SparrowMaiden It's impossible not to get your hopes up when you see that second line. It definitely makes sense to take a break from tracking if it's stressing you out more. Wishing you lots of luck with this cycle!

How are all you ladies in the TWW getting on? Anyone symptom spotting?

SparrowMaiden · 21/04/2021 22:05

Thanks @CMcA21 and @ItsMeantToBe.

And yes congrats to @ShoesEverywhere! Good luck with it!

I definitely seem to have cone across a lot of examples of people very quickly conceiving after pregnancy loss so I hope everyone in this thread is so lucky xxx

ItsMeantToBe · 21/04/2021 20:59

@ShoesEverywhere amazing! Fingers are crossed for you.

@SparrowMaiden sorry to hear what you've been through. I've had 2 CP's, my most recent one was last month at 5.2 weeks. I think it's impossible to not get excited. As soon as you POAS you're invested and planning. Hope you get a sticky BFP soon.

justwant2beamum · 21/04/2021 20:42

@ShoesEverywhere exciting, 🤞🏻🤞🏻 for you ✨

CMcA21 · 21/04/2021 20:31

Thanks @ItsMeantToBe that’s our plan then 😬 fingers crossed!

Hi @SparrowMaiden - hope you’re ok :( horrible what you’re going through but fingers crossed you’re okay to go again soon.

@ShoesEverywhere oooh exciting. Got everything crossed for you x

ShoesEverywhere · 21/04/2021 15:03

Omgoodness - took two tests this PM and both very very faint but definitely lines! I mean they are to me - husband still can barely see them but I've looked at enough negatives in my life!

Guess I did ovulate Grin

SparrowMaiden · 21/04/2021 13:50

Hi all, joining a little late to the thread. I'm currently having my first CP, started bleeding yesterday at 4 weeks on the dot. I'm an early ovulator and I tested early so I got my BFP last Wednesday. This was the 3rd cycle ttc baby #2. I've taken it really hard and I feel a bit silly for getting excited when we found out so early. We are going to get straight back on it as soon as I stop bleeding. I've decided all the bbt and fertility app stuff has just been adding to pressure and stress so this month it's just going to be as much BD as possible without worrying about dates. I've also vowed to myself I won't test until I'm a week late (or 5 weeks from yesterday, because who knows how long this cycle will be) I can't bear the idea of seeing a positive test and losing it again. I know there's no guarantees but the later I know the better I think, based on this month's experience. Anyway. Hello!

ItsMeantToBe · 21/04/2021 12:11

@CMcA21 Yes I think from Saturday and then every day until the day after your peak. Fingers crossed!

@lavenderlilaclily so sorry, that sounds awful. Loosing your baby that late must have been terrible.

I'm 7DPO today, AF is due a week today. I'm going to try and not test before then but not sure I'll have the self control. I just want to know either way.

justwant2beamum · 21/04/2021 10:59

@Aila1994 also 9dpo here. Already been testing (Bfns obviously 🙄) not hopeful this month as not had the huge rhr spike I had with BFP in jan and just generally feel like I'm out and not pregnant. 🤞🏻 for you ✨

lavenderlilaclily · 21/04/2021 10:49

thank you @Aila1994 💕 I'm sorry to hear about your MC :(
It is really upsetting that things like this happen, I know now that if I do manage to get pregnant again I'll just never feel at ease after any "milestone" - feel like any joy of pregnancy has been taken away from me now! but it doesn't stop me wanting to be pregnant again soo much.

fingers crossed for your rainbow baby too :) hope this cycle is your cycle!!

Aila1994 · 21/04/2021 09:58

Ohh @lavenderlilaclily that sounds absolutely awful and I hope your feeling a bit better 😣💐!

It’s just so scary that things like this happen, I struggled with a first trimester miscarriage so can only imagine what you have been through!

Fingers crossed you get your rainbow baby soon 🌈 🤞

lavenderlilaclily · 21/04/2021 08:57

Hello I was wondering if I could pop on and join this thread please?

I'm currently in the first month of ttc after a late miscarriage/stillbirth at 23 weeks at the end of January. It was my first baby and he was a beautiful little boy :( I'm not sure if my body has fully recovered yet tbh but I am desperate to be a mother to a living child so was keen to start trying again as soon as possible.

I'm currently 6dpo I think - don't think my chances are super high this month tbh because of a number of issues but still keeping fingers crossed! trying to hold off testing until 12 dpo but don't know if I'll manage

Aila1994 · 21/04/2021 08:46

Hi everyone! Quick update from me, 9dpo today and officially started testing this morning. (I have a relatively short LP so AF is due on Friday).

BFN but I know it’s early so I’m still hopeful!!

Anyone at a similar stage in their cycle that will be starting to test soon? Smile

CMcA21 · 20/04/2021 15:38

Hope you’re all okay girls. Hope you’re feeling better @Madeoftea ❤️ It definitely comes in waves.

@Lowkeyloopy glad you got your peak!! Fingers crossed for you honey.

I’m not doing OPKs yet but doing my temp and tracking that way. Due to ovulate on Monday according to my apps. Would we say DTD every day from Saturday unless my temps say otherwise? I feel nervous as this is our first month actually TTC 😩

Madeoftea · 20/04/2021 11:19

@Flopsy88 thank you so much. My cycles were regular before yes, I think that's another reason that I'm so frustrated because it's still messing everything up, and this whole year so far seems like a wasted opportunity. If that makes sense? I'm still using opks and hoping for a peak in case it's just a super long cycle 🤞

@Lowkeyloopy I think that's it exactly. I've suddenly gone through the main stages and now there's nothing to stop me having to deal with it. I also think it comes in waves and is a continuous process but I've had a good cry and heart to heart with my partner which always helps, and we're getting ourselves away to the seaside this weekend for a change of scenery and quality time together.

Congrats on your peak. The month I conceived we were only doing every other day so you've still got a good chance!

ItsMeantToBe · 20/04/2021 11:14

Sorry, I meant if we don't hear from you today we know why...I don't know why mum slipped in there! I guess I just have it on the brain, ha!

ItsMeantToBe · 20/04/2021 11:13

Woohoo! @Lowkeyloopy if we don't hear from you mum today we will know why Wink.

I woke up in such a bad mood. I just feel like I have nothing to look forward to and nothing to focus on. To make it worse an old friend has announced that she's expecting today. I normally get hormonal around this time in my cycle, which is making me think I'm not pregnant but I'm trying to stay hopeful.

Hope everyone else is ok.

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