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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!

641 replies

Lowkeyloopy · 06/04/2021 12:49

Hi all!

I know there are several threads dedicated to this topic, which I've lurked on for several weeks without saying anything, but some threads (sadly) have so many people on them that it can be a bit hard to follow, or it feels awkward to jump into the middle of a conversation between people who have been chatting for a while. Does anyone fancy joining me on a new thread?

My story: 33, TTC baby #1, conceived first cycle in Feb, but had a MC at 6 weeks in early March. Absolutely awful, as everyone knows, and I was in a rubbish place mentally for a few weeks, but I've also counted my blessings - it was early, I needed no medical intervention and at least I know I can conceive. Also AF has returned today - 29 days after first day of my MC. I usually have a 28-29 day cycle so am so grateful that my body seems to be getting with the programme again.

So CD1 for me, and I'll be TTC this month and back to tracking - BBT from tomorrow, OPKs from CD 11, still taking my Pregnacare and trying to keep exercising and eating healthily!

Would anyone like to join me if they're going through something similar? How have you been coping since your MC? What's on your TTC to-do list?! (Other than the obvious..!)

Baby dust to all xx

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Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 25/04/2021 18:25

@CMcA21 Lol maybe try just pouncing him rather than telling him, if he’s feeling a bit put out by the lack of spontaneity!

Once you’ve had a higher temp for three days post ovulation, that suggests you ovulated. I use fertility friend, which puts red crosshairs on your chart after three days of high temps to show the day you ovulated and what your average temps were before ovulation. Your temps should stay above the cover line (the horizontal line) after ovulation even if
you’re not pregnant, then they start dropping if AF is on her way. It’s not a perfect science of course - lots of things can change your temps and everyone’s different.

Some people notice an implantation dip - where your temp drops a little when implantation happens. Though that can happen in non-pregnant charts too because of estrogen increase I think. So no need to worry if your temp dips one day. Also it’ll be lower if you take it earlier in the morning.

Have attached my chart to help explain! My temps were a bit weird pre ovulation - I think I took them at the wrong times / after drinking water.

I’m hoping today’s dip is implantation 🤦🏻‍♀️

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CMcA21 · 25/04/2021 18:22

Hang on sorry, day 13 or 14?

CMcA21 · 25/04/2021 18:21

Also sorry for the other question @Lowkeyloopy but from that chart have I ovulated day 11 or day 12? I thought it’s the day your temp goes up? But not sure

CMcA21 · 25/04/2021 18:13

@Lowkeyloopy so we DTD Thursday night around midnight and then last night around the same time so Friday/Saturday, I’ll tell him we will do it again tonight and see what happens. Will see what my temps saying tomorrow, should it still be high tomorrow?

Scoaf · 25/04/2021 17:47

Thanks for all the advice on supplements. Its a bloody minefield. Still quite new to all this so trying to get my head around it all.
So AF is 4 days late now and ive had 2 negative tests.. my body is playing some silly games.

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 25/04/2021 17:17

Sorry @ItsMeantToBe that was meant for you obviously!

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Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 25/04/2021 17:16

Ooh keeping fingers crossed for your test tomorrow then! Let us know how you get on! X

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Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 25/04/2021 17:15

@CMcA21 If you’ve been taking your temp every day as soon as you wake up, around the same time, that spike is a sign you’ve ovulated! That’s good - it’s what you’re looking for 🙂 Maybe get in one more DTD today to really cover yourselves - the egg lasts 12-24 hours. But it’s really the DTD in the lead up to ovulation that matters. So your DP will be off the hook soon!

It is tricky keeping it spontaneous isn’t it! I had to remind myself not to wave the positive OPK in his face this month! Tried more of a “FYI - you may get lucky later” approach - made it a bit less clinical!

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ItsMeantToBe · 25/04/2021 17:13

@Lowkeyloopy it definitely helps telling close people doesn't it, but it's also so hard to do. I'm close to my family but don't talk to them about private things normally.

AF is due on Wednesday. I normally have 28 day cycles but this is my first one after my CP so god knows. I probably will test first thing in the morning.

Anyone else due AF soon (sorry I've lost track!)

CMcA21 · 25/04/2021 16:59

My DP keeps saying he doesn’t like how sex is ‘planned’...

I’m like the clue of planned pregnancy is in the name. Soz.

Also can anyone please explain to me why my temp shot straight up this morning? I don’t understand bbt at all but I’ve been doing it every morning (I missed one day last Sunday)

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!
Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 25/04/2021 16:51

Oh I missed that it was your family - I read it as your DP’s family for some reason. My DP’s fam probably wouldn’t think about it / be interested in what I was drinking, but my fam might. Might be the same with yours! Good that they wouldn’t ask questions though. I ended up telling my mum about the MC as it was helpful to talk to her, and it gave me an opportunity to say “so FYI we won’t be making any announcements anytime soon and it might take longer than hoped”, so in a weird way telling her we were TTC has made her less likely to ask about our plans and make me feel pressured. But it’s so personal isn’t it - depends on what the fam are like and your relationship as to what they would do and how you’d feel about them knowing.

Oh I would be so tempted to test too! When is AF due? Are you going to wait until she hopefully doesn’t show?

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ItsMeantToBe · 25/04/2021 16:38

@Lowkeyloopy My family will definitely clock on, if it wasn't for my CP they might not of. They respect that we want to keep it quiet though and not keep asking. It does put more pressure on like you said @Flopsy88

I'm on 11DPO today and I've been so tired. I've also had very slight cramps, but maybe I'm overthinking too much. I'm so tempted to test in the morning, although I know I really shouldn't.

Hope everyone's had a nice Sunday.

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 25/04/2021 10:55

@Scoaf - I take pregnacare and my DP takes Wellman (the his and hers pack). We were taking them for about three months before we started trying in Feb and fell PG first time, so I’m going to keep taking them even if that was a complete coincidence! I think they perhaps just make your pee really expensive.. Folic acid and vit D are probably all you need if you have a healthy diet with plenty of fruit and veg though. I’ve been reading a bit about Coq10 though - might try that if I have another MC or if it takes us a while.

I also took evening primrose oil this month before ovulation on @Flopsy88’s recommendation and think I did notice a difference in CM.

@ItsMeantToBe That is a bit annoying but you can perhaps just spin it as a health decision? I cut down on caffeine several months before we started TTC because I get slight anxiety and figured it wasn’t helping. Same with alcohol. Tell them you’re going veggie or something too, haha - major health kick!

@CMcA21 @Flopsy88 Have fun with the DTD! Lol at your DP being so generous with that offer Flopsy. Sacrificing himself for the cause!

DPO 6 (or maybe 5) for me today. I had some slight twinging yesterday but all quiet so far today. Woke up very thirsty. I’m obsessively checking my symptoms for the month I fell pregnant. If I get more twinging and a twitchy eye today (yes seriously..) I’ll convince myself it’s worked..! But I didn’t really record any proper symptoms until 8DPO last time - that’s when I felt definite cramping and twinging and felt hot. Just gotta be patient...

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Flopsy88 · 25/04/2021 10:24

@ItsMeantToBe That is terrifying! It's so far in the future! Really annoying that your DH let slip. It's going to be so hard to keep it quiet early on (if that's what you want to do). I feel like it puts even more pressure on now people know I've had the mc and are obviously trying again

@Scoaf I'm taking CoQ10 as well as vit d and folic acid. It's expensive but there's evidence it improves egg quality. I also take evening primrose oil during the follicular phase but stop after ovulation. It's supposed to help with cervical mucus. I haven't actually noticed any difference in cm but I did get pregnant the month I started the EPO. It might have been a coincidence though. I've put my DP on a multivitamin too

I'm on CD9 so we're DTD every other day, although my DP said he doesn't mind if we need to do it every day just to make sure 😂 Hope everyone's having a lovely weekend! 🙂

ItsMeantToBe · 24/04/2021 19:40

@Scoaf I've just been taking pregnancy multivitamins. Seven Seas I think.

My DH let slip to family today that I'm cutting back on my caffeine...so annoyed! They'll obviously know that we're TTC/pregnant now.

Just seen this on SM- how crazy!

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!
CMcA21 · 24/04/2021 10:27

Hi girls hope you’re all okay. Sorry to those who have got AF and fingers crossed for everyone in TWW.

I’m CD12 today so we’re going the DTD every day now until Tuesday and keep temping. I was v regular 28 day cycles pre MC and my post MC cycle was 33 days so hoping it’s gonna go back to normal ASAP. Hope everyone has a lovely weekend 💜

Scoaf · 24/04/2021 07:20

@lavenderlilaclily
Thanks so much. Yes it is helping just to vent a little bit. AF is still a no show so did a test this monring and got a BFN so not sure whats going on there..

Sorry to hear you have got a UTI... hopefully you will be feeling better soon.
@ItsMeantToBe thanks so much.
We just dont want the added pressure lf leople asking questions. Everbody on here has been really lovely and it makes u feel less lonely.

As im quite new to all this isnt there any supplements people think help?
Im taking Vit D and Folic Acid but thats it

ItsMeantToBe · 23/04/2021 22:44

Welcome @Scoaf sorry for what you've been through. We also haven't told anyone IRL that we're trying and I find this group really helpful, hope you do too.

@Lowkeyloopy My DH probably doesn't have a clue when AF Is due, I think it would take him a while before he asked. He'll probably be able to tell from my mood though. I'm 9DPO today, still a long way off before I'm going to test (if I manage to hold out). Absolutely 0 symptoms of AF or pregnancy. Normally by now my boobs would hurt even by breathing near them!
Sorry I can't help about your ovulation, I really don't have a clue about it. If I don't get pregnant this month I really need to research and get my head around it.

@justwant2beamum You never know! Try testing again in a few days if AF doesn't arrive.

@lavenderlilaclily Ouch! Hope you're stocked up with cranberry water!

@Aila1994 oh I'm sorry. Make the most of AF- drink lots of caffeine and lots of nice treats and then it's a nice fresh month.

Aila1994 · 23/04/2021 22:17

Well girls, looks like I’m out this month!

Fingers crossed for everyone still due to test in the upcoming days!

Hopefully next month is my month 🤞❤️!

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 23/04/2021 20:20

Oh so annoying @lavenderlilaclily - UTIs are the worst! I had one a few weeks ago. Cannot cope with them at all - so uncomfortable! Fortunately antibiotics cleared it right up quickly - hope you’re feeling better soon.

I stumbled across this thread while googling and thought I’d share in case of interest.. (so much for not symptom spotting during the 2WW).

pregnancyforum.momtastic.com/threads/for-all-you-2wwers.67978/

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lavenderlilaclily · 23/04/2021 14:12

@Scoaf I'm so sorry about your MCs :( it is so important to find a place to talk about it and to express your feelings, it's so hard isn't it, holding it all in and feeling like no one knows or understands. But hopefully you will find a good and supportive space here to talk about it and get support, and I'm sure you will get a beautiful sticky bfp very soon 💕

@Lowkeyloopy that's confusing about the temps/peak! I guess the way people's LH surges occur vary, so it's not out of the question that you might have ovulated the same day as your peak? Alternatively maybe the small temp jump meant you were just ovulating/about to ovulate that morning, after your peak the previous evening? So maybe you're actually 3dpo? I don't know though, it's all so confusing, I can't get my head around it! Either way keeping fingers crossed for you🤞

Turns out my slight cramps were not implantation cramps but a UTI 😣 got some more symptoms last night and went to the doc this morning and yep, UTI. How annoying!! I don't think UTIs technically would stop implantation, but I've just had infection after infection since giving birth 3 months ago, so I think my body must be in such an inflammatory state that conceiving doesn't seem very possible. But guess it's not over until AF shows! She's due on Tuesday so we'll see.

Scoaf · 23/04/2021 11:11

@Lowkeyloopy
Aww thanks so much for being so lovely.
I just think my body is playing tricks on me as i have zero symptoms but with my other pregnancies i had lots so just dont know what to think really.
Hopefully you are right about my appointment 🤞🤞

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 23/04/2021 09:13

Oh I’m so sorry @justwant2beamum. I know it may not help much now (and I would struggle to hear this too) but remember in the great scheme of life, a month or two is very little - it’s only because of all the bloody waiting within each cycle that it feels like an age from month to month. Be kind to yourself - maybe try to find yourself something else to focus on for a couple of months. Maybe like a new exercise routine - something that will make you even healthier for when you can start trying again?

@Aila1994 I wouldnt write yourself off quite yet! 11 DPO might be too early for an IC and maybe that cramping could be implantation? Fingers firmly crossed for you!

@Scoaf Oh hun, I’m not surprised you’re feeling scared about it. I would be the same and think it’s totally ok not to test too if you don’t want to! If AF continues not to show you’ll know soon enough anyway, and presumably you’re not busy eating brie, pounding the wine and doing contact sports in the meantime 🙂 so there’s not much to be gained by knowing now if you think it might just make you nervous. That’s very frustrating about the appointment delay, but at least the referral is in and there’s kinda a target date to work towards. I’m sure nothing is wrong as such - the likelihood is you’ve just had bad luck. Have you heard of Bettina Rae? She’s on YouTube. She had two successfully pregnancies, then three MC, then another successful pregnancy. It’s just so random. Once you get that appointment date fixed, picture yourself sitting at home on that date thinking “crazy how I was going for fertility tests today when I’m actually now 5 months pregnant!” And laughing about it with your DP - both super chilled and happy. 🙂 @ItsMeantToBe recommended positive visualisation to me a few weeks ago and I’m really try to give it a go. I’m all about the science really of course, but still I reckon our bodies really respond to what’s going on in our minds.

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Scoaf · 23/04/2021 08:56

@Lowkeyloopy
Thanks so much for your reply.
I'm trying so hard to stay positive.
I have been referred to the reacurrent miscarriage clinic but they are 6months behind with their appointments due to covid. Its just the not knowing if something is wrong.
Im currently 16Dpo and Af was due yesterday but im too scared to test. X

justwant2beamum · 23/04/2021 08:47

Bfn for me at 11dpo on a frer so I'm out. Also out for May as partner going away for work which makes the bfn's even worse. Like there's only a few chances left in the year, I missed last month because that was the cycle post mc surgery and don't think I ovulated as bled days 1-13 then got af on cd27 and now away to miss May too.

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