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Original poster

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!

641 replies

Lowkeyloopy · 06/04/2021 12:49

Hi all!

I know there are several threads dedicated to this topic, which I've lurked on for several weeks without saying anything, but some threads (sadly) have so many people on them that it can be a bit hard to follow, or it feels awkward to jump into the middle of a conversation between people who have been chatting for a while. Does anyone fancy joining me on a new thread?

My story: 33, TTC baby #1, conceived first cycle in Feb, but had a MC at 6 weeks in early March. Absolutely awful, as everyone knows, and I was in a rubbish place mentally for a few weeks, but I've also counted my blessings - it was early, I needed no medical intervention and at least I know I can conceive. Also AF has returned today - 29 days after first day of my MC. I usually have a 28-29 day cycle so am so grateful that my body seems to be getting with the programme again.

So CD1 for me, and I'll be TTC this month and back to tracking - BBT from tomorrow, OPKs from CD 11, still taking my Pregnacare and trying to keep exercising and eating healthily!

Would anyone like to join me if they're going through something similar? How have you been coping since your MC? What's on your TTC to-do list?! (Other than the obvious..!)

Baby dust to all xx

OP posts:
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Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 29/05/2021 07:48

Also just took an OPK strip because I know they detect HCG, and got two strong lines that I would be very happy about if I were hoping to ovulate, haha. May have to nip out and get a frer later...

OP posts:
Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 29/05/2021 07:46

Morning ladies, 11DPO and I can barely dare say it... but I think I might have a squinter!! Wasted my frer at 9DPO didn’t I 🤦🏻‍♀️ but did a boots own strip this morning (which gave me a faint line last time at 12 DPO) and I can see something. So difficult to see on the photo but please tell me I’m not going nuts!

I was going to wait until Sunday but last night we went out for dinner (steak and a little glass of red wine - naughty) and I suddenly got a funny sensation in my nipples! So weird - I literally leant across the table to DP and told him - I think he thought it was a come-on, 😂but nope, they just randomly went tingly for a bit then it faded!

Then this morning felt a very slight sensation of lightning crotch - like a slight pain pulling like.. inside/in the pelvis. Anyone ever had that?

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!
OP posts:
CMcA21 · 28/05/2021 18:11

@Lowkeyloopy gonna read more about the seeds 🤞🏻

@Flopsy88 @bea19 thank you! So excited, we’re getting the ferry over tonight.

Bit of a weird one and TMI potentially. DTD last night and today have had egg white discharge with brown blood/spotting in it.. never ever had this before?! Is this normal

bea19 · 27/05/2021 10:17

@Mwilliams31 sorry to hear you’re feeling sad and frustrated. TTC is such a difficult time. Hopefully you will find support here and it will be your month soon!

@Lowkeyloopy sorry to hear about your BFN but you’re probably right that it was too early so you’re still in with a chance this month! I also tested with a FRER this morning at 12DPO, which is when I tested positive last time, and it was a BFN 😢. I was convinced I’d had implantation symptoms at 10DPO (I got really shivery around that time each time I’ve got pregnant before) which added to the nausea had got my hopes up. Now I’m just feeling sick on and off but not pregnant so not a great morning here!

@CMcA21 hope you have a lovely break!

Flopsy88 · 27/05/2021 09:34

@Lowkeyloopy Oh noooo! Sorry to hear about you're BFN but like you said, it is far too early! I wish they wouldn't sell FRERs in packs of two. It makes me use them less wisely. I know I have the choice of not buy a pack of two but I'm incapable of making that choice. I'm just drinking tescos own brand pink grapefruit juice. Annoyingly it's in a plastic bottle. I think tropicana is in a carton but a bit more expensive.

@CMcA21 Your weekend sounds lovely! Excellent half term weather too ☀️ I've read about seeds and also put a spoonful of ground flaxseeds in my morning smoothie. Not sure what they're supposed to do though 🤷🏻‍♀️ I guess all these things are healthy for us in general, even if they don't actually help with ttc

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 27/05/2021 07:36

Sooo I just totally wasted a FRER at 9DPO... BFN and totally pointless! I felt some twinging yesterday but if that was implantation then obviously the HCG wouldn’t be high enough yet. Plus it would be 6 days before missed period if my cycle was 28 days, but based on last month it seems to be 30 days now (I blame pregnacare!). I think I’m just bored tbh - wanted to introduce a bit of drama into my morning..! And waste a few quid in the process... Must hide it from DP, lol - he even thought testing Sunday would be too early...!

@Flopsy88 - I hope your positive OPK turns up soon! Shame to hear that about the grapefruit juice - that’s on my list to introduce next month if we don’t catch this month! Is there a particularly brand you buy?

@CMcA21 Hope your DP feels better soon! I’m sure the break will be literally a breath of fresh air for you both - enjoy! Yeh I’ve read a bit about seeds I put flaxseed in my smoothie every morning anyway (though that’s more meant for before ovulation I think) and have occasionally been putting some sunflower seeds and sesame seeds in too post ovulation, but not particularly religiously. I think pumpkin seeds are the other one for pre ovulation. Definitely can’t do any harm anyway!

OP posts:
CMcA21 · 26/05/2021 12:47

@Mwilliams31 hope you’re okay love, I felt the same as you last month if you’ve read the thread, we were all convinced it was my month. Unfortunately it wasn’t 😭 fingers crossed us all soon x

@Flopsy88 I’m not doing OPKs yet, we decided we want to give ourselves a few months to try and let it happen as naturally as poss as we already feel after one month that it’s become so transactional. I’m CD11 too so we’re at the same point, gonna start DTD every other day from tomorrow I think...

but DP is not feeling great 😢 he is unwell. We’re going back to Ireland to see his family and friends this weekend though so I’m hoping the break and change of scenery helps us and makes it happen for us. Clinging on to everything atm.

I’ve also started taking B6 now because I read it helps with lining in the TWW. So I’m taking Vit D, folic acid and b6 every day. Not tried anything else yet in terms of juice etc but I’ve read about seeds...

Flopsy88 · 26/05/2021 08:25

Good morning everyone! Hope you're all doing ok

@Mwilliams31 So sorry you're struggling at the moment. It's such bad timing that your friend is having a baby at the same time as your due date would have been. That must be really hard ❤ I also convive myself every month that this is the month. I even work out when my due date will be if it is! 🙈 It does make it even more disappointing but I don't know how to stop it.

@ItsMeantToBe I haven't quite got to the legs in the air stage yet. I'm trying to maintain a bit of romance! I always stay lying down with my legs firmly shut though. I showed my DP the app the other day so he could see the bbt graph and forgot about all the little hearts for when we'd dtd. I was worried he'd think I was crazy for recording it but actually he thought it was cute!

@Lowkeyloopy It seems like 5 minutes since you were in your last tww! I'm sure time is going much slower for you right now. It's understandable you're nervous about testing early but like someone already said (I think?) it is useful to know about chemicals so you can tell the GP if you ever need investigations. I'm sure it won't get to that stage though! 🤞🏻

@CMcA21 How are you getting on lovely? I think we're at the stage in our cycles. Are you using OPKs this month?

I'm on CD11 so dtd every other day. No sign of a positive opk yet. This is my first month of drinking grapefruit juice and so far it's made no difference to my cervical mucus. It's also horrible 😖

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 26/05/2021 07:23

Welcome @Mwilliams31, so sorry for your loss and to hear you’re feeling sad and frustrated at the moment. I think everyone on the group has felt that at one time or another. 🙂 As @CMcA21 says, the chances are only 1 in 3 even if you do absolutely everything right. Have you read “The Impatient Woman’s Guide to getting pregnant?” - I think that stat is in there. I think it’s something our bodies have evolved to do - I think to protect women from being pregnant all the time, because our bodies don’t realise we have birth control now! So even if all conditions are perfect, sometimes your body just won’t play ball. I hope that brings you some comfort, as frustrating as it is!

@ItsMeantToBe - I don’t do legs up the wall, but I prop my hips up on a cushion and update the app while my DP is in the bathroom. Love the idea of a reward sticker for adults 😂

8DPO for me and the TWW is crawling... I think I’m going to fo a FRER on Sunday at 12 DPO, which is when I got my BFP in Feb. Unless I freak out about the possibility of a chemical last minute of course..!

OP posts:
ItsMeantToBe · 25/05/2021 22:38

Welcome @Mwilliams31 sorry for your loss. It's so difficult isn't it. You obsess all month long and cross your fingers that it'll be your month and then AF comes along and you've got to pick yourself back up to try again. I don't really get the science behind it. Can you speak to your GP?

Does anyone DTD and then straight away log it on their app (whilst legs are up against the wall)? I feel like it's the adult equivalent of a reward sticker 🤣. My LH has rocketed the past 2 days and started to drop today so we've DTD every other day🤞. I'm looking forward to my TWW so I can have a break, ha!

Mwilliams31 · 25/05/2021 19:10

@CMcA21 I waited for my first cycle after the miscarriage and then we started TTC again. It’s just so disheartening because every month you feel like its going to be that month you know? My due date is next week and my friend is in hospital at the moment having her baby so everything feeling a bit raw. Is the 1/3 chance even if you have sex at the right time? Thank you for replying to me ❤️ Xx

CMcA21 · 25/05/2021 19:04

@Mwilliams31 please don’t feel like it’s you, each month you only have a 1/3 chance of getting pregnant and then you have to factor in potential chemicals etc. When did you start TTC again? Straight away?

CMcA21 · 25/05/2021 19:03

@bea19 my cycles are more like 33 days now but there’s only been two post MC.

So I should O next Tuesday based on that. We’re going to start DTD Thursday this week and go every other day for a week 😂 I think. I’m
Trying not to plan it though and just do it spontaneously.

How is everyone? My heads been up the wall with work, thank god for half term next week.

Mwilliams31 · 25/05/2021 12:17

Hi everyone, I had a blighted ovum miscarriage last December. Have been TTC ever since but haven’t had any luck so far and it’s really getting me down. Worries something is wrong and considering paying for private tests! I can’t understand when you get positive OPK’s, DTD on the day and still don’t get pregnant. Anyone else feeling sad and frustrated?! Xx

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 24/05/2021 00:20

@ItsMeantToBe No that made sense! Fingers crossed for a longer cycle for you then! That peak looks like it came out of nowhere - maybe your egg will be similarly speedy and nip down the tube pronto! Smile

@Msd2416 that’s so helpful to know thank you - I think I would be tempted to test a little early in that case... don’t think I was mentally up to seeing a chemical last month, but with a bit of distance since the MC, I think like @bea19, I’d rather know (and add it to the horrible tally).

Yawn - this is far too past my bedtime..! Have a good Monday when you get there ladies.

OP posts:
Msd2416 · 23/05/2021 22:41

@Lowkeyloopy they definitely count chemicals as 1/3 I went to the doctors after 2 chemicals and 1 MC and was instantly tested and DH had Sperm analysis. We were scheduled for our follow up appointment but have since had our BFP Smile

Would definitely push to be seen!

bea19 · 23/05/2021 22:24

@ItsMeantToBe looks like tonight could be the ticket - best get DH a Rennies 😂

@Lowkeyloopy yes, I wondered whether they make distinctions based on when a loss occurred in terms of the ‘3 consecutive losses before you can get care’ but the NICE guidance doesn’t make any mention of gestation so unsure - may be decided locally (very unhelpful for us if that’s the case).

ItsMeantToBe · 23/05/2021 21:58

My temp on CD14 was 36.26 and 15 was 36.13, so average really. It was lower yesterday at 35.88 and then higher today at 36.41, which is my highest recorded temp. God knows. I read somewhere that if you have a short luteal phase it can sometimes be too little time for implantation which can cause MC's (I've probably done a bad job of explaining that). In that case I'm hoping for a long cycle now!

I've signed that partition a few weeks ago. It's crazy that we have to go through it 3 times before getting help.

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 23/05/2021 21:51

@ItsMeantToBe That's so strange! Looks like that peak came out of nowhere. Did your temp spike around 14/15? Can't see those temps on your pics, but it looks like your temp was a bit up and down since then and may have spiked today? I reckon get offline and get on it to catch the egg! Grin You DTD on 21 May too by the looks of it so that might be enough anyway! Good luck!

OP posts:
Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 23/05/2021 21:45

Thanks @Bea19 - I've just signed and shared with the one friend who knows about my MC! Women's health issues are so underfunded and under-researched. If men had MCs there is no way they would be told to go through that before it was investigated.

I know what you mean re wanting to know about a MC. I wonder if they would count chemicals though. I'm also still not sure what counts as a chemical/early loss and what counts as a MC?

OP posts:
ItsMeantToBe · 23/05/2021 21:40

Hi ladies,

Sorry to hear AF showed her ugly faced @justwant2beamum fingers crossed for next month for you. I hope you've had lots of yummy treats and a nice hot bath.

@Msd2416 any sign of AF yet?

@CMcA21 good luck with the interview! It's good to have that to focus on too. I've applied for a promotion at work so hoping to get an interview for that🤞.

@bea19 welcome back. Hope you're feeling ok. I've never really suffered from nausea but hopefully it's a good sign for you!

@Lowkeyloopy the TWW is super emotional isn't it. Just be kind to yourself and have some chocolate and plenty of rest.

So I assumed I'd hit my peak around CD14/15 but carried on doing OPK's anyway and look at this! Can't believe I'm ovulating on CD21, it's obviously going to be a long cycle for me again. DH has currently got heart burn but he's going to have to suck it up and DTD 😂. Gutted we didn't DTD yesterday, but do you think today and tomorrow will do?

TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!
TTC after MC - new thread for newbies / lurkers on other threads!
bea19 · 23/05/2021 21:31

@Lowkeyloopy Sorry to hear you’re feeling emotional- the TWW is a strain isn’t it? I’ve decided to test rather than wait for AF. I decided that even though I’d be devastated if I had another loss, I would rather know given the (broken) system means women can’t get specialist care for miscarriage until they have had three in a row 😢. So for me, I would want to know in the hope that I can get care more quickly if i unfortunately have more losses (I’m 37 so time is not on my side) but we all need to do what’s best for us and our mental health.

Tommy’s have a petition running at the moment to try and change the system so we can get care without having to have so many losses. I’ll try to share the link for anyone who would like to sign. actions.tommys.org/a/miscarriage-petition?utm_source=google&utm_medium=paid_search&utm_campaign=miscarriage-lancet&utm_content=&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI3fzasM_g8AIVAhoGAB0O0AaWEAAYASAAEgKtsvD_BwE

Original poster
Lowkeyloopy · 23/05/2021 17:54

Hi all, hope you're having good and relaxing weekends. 5DPO for me today. Feeling stupidly emotional for no reason! Obviously not a symptom at this stage - think I've just overtired and haaaaate the TWW.

Welcome back @bea19 - good idea to have a break from MN! TTC can feel so all consuming sometimes. I had slight nausea at 9 DPO last month (not PG, though do wonder if it was a chemical) and at 10 DPO the month I conceived (a couple of days before a BFP). So jury's out as to whether that's just something I just get because of hormone fluctuations around that time! I really hope it means something for you! Are you planning to test or wait for AF?

@Aila1994 @CMcA21 good luck for the interviews! It's exciting to hear that life is moving on in ways other than TTC - so good to have something else to put your energy into!

@CmcA21, you're trying OPKs for the first time this month aren't you? I would aim to DTD every other day after AF is finished. Then every day for a few days once you get your peak. You could just wait until you get your peak and start DTD then, but if it's your first time with OPKs you perhaps don't want the stress of worrying if you've missed your peak - you don't know yet if you're someone who will get lots of notice, with lines gradually getting darker, or someone (like me) who goes from low to peak to a matter of hours! Every other day will have you covered either way. As @bea19 says, it's the days before ovulation that are the days to target for DTD.

OP posts:
bea19 · 22/05/2021 22:53

@CMcA21 how long are your cycles now? I read that DTD in the days before ovulation gives a better chance of conceiving as the sperm are ready and waiting for the egg 😊 but not sure what that means for when you should start…

bea19 · 22/05/2021 22:29

Good luck for the interviews @Aila1994 @CMcA21!

Im confused - I think I’m 8dpo today, though it could be 7dpo (CB OPK first peak day was CD14 so ovulation should have been CD15. I had ovulation pain on CD14 but my cheapie OPKs didn’t go positive until CD15, which would match with CB…) but I’ve been getting bouts of nausea for a couple of days now… I just think it must be too early or maybe the nausea is just in my headGrin Anyone else had this?

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