Recent MC - New cycles & trying again

@AMS19 @Mellous I was exactly the same - fell pregnant before first time and yet this time it took months and now I’m wondering if it will be months again!? My consultant said chances to fall pregnant after 35 are around 15-20% (same as another gynae I saw for different purposes last year) so I know I can’t just expect it will happen immediately and need to be patient but it still really p**see me off ha! X

Ha @Mellous I remember saying to my husband when it happened :if we are more fertile after a mc we are laughing given how quickly we fell." And here we are, me eating my words 😂😂🙋‍♀️ ah, screw it. What will be will be I guess!

@gizmo167 gosh I'm not sure how ill cope if it takes 3 years. Honestly I can't even think that is an option right now!
I totally get the wanting to hang onto hope. I was the opposite, had all the typical early pregnancy signs and was worrying that my hopes were getting up so tested to remove the hope from getting out of control. I then started spotting 2 hours after testing and I'm glad I'd tested as it prepared me for it. But totally understand wanting to cling onto any hope you have xx

@cupcakesandglitter I take my rhr but it doesn't really help me as it doesn't track my bbt. It does increase around ovulation though. Here is my chart from this cycle

@AMS19 and @Mellous I'm with you both! It took me 3 years to conceive with my DD, I stupidly thought it would happen straightaway and when it didnt after having all the tests done to show I was ovulating etc I sort of just gave up! Then got the BFP with her and when I got the first BFP this time around, a year ago, despite knowing I was a LOT older now I stupidly didnt even think of a mc happening, now here I am another year later, 2nd mc just over waiting to see what the hell is happening with my body now!

I will test if AF doesnt appear by the weekend but ladies honestly I am terrified to test, at this minute and time I'd just rather cling on to that wee tiny bit of hope that is left that it MIGHT be good news even though I know it wont, than test and get a BFN and then I'll know I'm out, that sounds mad doesnt it??

It's crazy isn't it @Mellous I know the chances are only 35% each cycle but I think when it's happened first time for you before you can't help but panic that was our only shot and now it will never happen. I'm driving myself mad with worry worry convinced we are going to need ivf. I think I'm going to wait until the autumn then potentially look into fertility testing at that point if it hasn't happened. I'm at a loss at what more I can now do 🤷‍♀️

@PlantMummy87 thank you. I just can't get my head about having sex at the perfect time and it not happening. But absolutely, my body must be getting rid of bad eggs. All I need is one good egg 🙏 right now, as disappointed as I am, I'm grateful for good cycle lengths (ovulation CD13, LP now 10 days) and grateful I am ovulating each cycle so getting a shot once a month. So many ladies aren't that lucky. I'm just going to keep up the supplements and healthy eating, up the exercise and looking forward to things starting to open back up so I have a silver lining for not being pregnant! Xx

Sorry in last message released not realised. 🤦‍♀️

@SuzieDeLaTour thanks lovely, my fingers are crossed for you too 💕 Not feeling too positive about things now as think pms grumps have got me now, but will know what's what by in the next few days/next week. Trying to see it as a positive that this was my first 'normal' month post mc and that all the positive steps I've made this month are getting my closer to my rainbow baby. It is so tough though as it does feel like it will never happen.

@AMS19 I'm sorry things have been tough for you over the last few days. It is really tough when you are doing everything you can do to be healthy and positive and your body doesn't do what you are willing it to do, but as you said before, the perfect egg is just around the corner waiting to be realised. Xx

Thanks @SuzieDeLaTour I really hope so! I was so lucky to fall pregnant first cycle trying last time, so had really expected it to be quicker. But must keep going, what else can we do! Got everything crossed for you AF stays away xx

@AMS19 oh sweetheart I know that feeling. Took me 7/8 months to conceive last time and I kept panicking that it wouldn’t happen ☹️ But you’re young, fit, going above and beyond to do all the right things 😘 my consultant said first 3 months post-MC cycles can be all over the place so hopefully cycle 4 will be your lucky one!! X

@cupcakesandglitter wow you are one incredibly strong woman, sorry to hear you have been through alot.

I only joined the thread this week as I've been going out of my mind! This is my first proper cycle since my MMC in Dec and MVA in Jan. I feel I put too much pressure on myself and took the fun out of DTD so I had a good talking to myself yesterday! Still waiting for a peak and I'm at CD21 so who know if I have ovulated or not.

I have found the stories on this thread very reassuring and its nice to speak to people who have been through the same thing as my OH and family don't like talking about it. Also its lovely to see their BFPs coming in.

@dippyegg32 I hope you are feeling better today. As the girls said it could be normal bleeding. I have my fingers crossed for you xx

@SuzieDeLaTour I'm sorry it's tough. I thought I'd be pregnant by now. Each cycle that goes by the more I worry it will never happen. But trying to focus on the positives as much as I can. It's 100% pre period spotting. Pregnancy test was stark white and the spotting is continuous as it was last cycle xx

Thanks for responding girls! I’m pretty sure it wouldn’t be pregnancy as according to my app I’m only 8DPO but I think it’s more likely 7 days as I was still showing positive last Thursday morning so too early for HCG to be detected 🤷‍♀️ I was very ratty this morning, snapping at my husband (though in my defence he deserved it!) so I think PMS is rearing it’s ugly head. I just know I’ll be so gutted when AF arrives - although I’ve convinced myself it probably hasn’t happened this month just knowing 100% it’s over will make me feel down.
@PlantMummy87 ooh well spotting could be a positive sign!? I’ve got my fingers crossed for you sweetheart x
@AMS19 how are you feeling? Are you sure it’s your period? X

@SuzieDeLaTour is it definitely not a pregnancy?

I'm 10DPO today and have started spotting so period is on its way. I'm actually quite pleased I got to 10DPO, I only got to 9DPO last cycle. Onto cycle 4 for me! 🙄🤞

@SuzieDeLaTour oh no, I'm sorry, it doesn't necessarily mean you are out at all. Sending you lots of positive vibes.

I'm also feeling like AF is on the way 😞 feeling crampy and grumpy. Had the tiniest bit of spotting 6dpo, now 8dpo, which made me feel like there was a bit of hope, but thinking now it was just my body messing me around.

Thanks @gizmo167 it's definitely been tough. It's horrible isn't it 😓 I hope everything is okay for you get your BFP soon xx

@SuzieDeLaTour when I used to use OPKs I'd have a smaller surge a few days before AF, I've noticed now that I'll get EWCM sometimes just before too? You do get an extra surge - that being said, I had a second urge at CD33 or something with my daughter! That's when I'd ovulated, and this time round I ovulated around CD25-28! So could you DTD and keep testing OPKs just in case it is ov?

@PlantMummy87 it’s definitely not pregnancy - I think it would be far too soon to pick up any hcg yet? Just getting myself a bit down thinking it’s probably aF on her sodding way!!! Arrrghhh!! X

Hi @SuzieDeLaTour, some women get a LH surge before a period, or it could be as you said trying to ovulate a second time, alternatively as LH tests can't tell the difference between LH and hcg it could be pregnancy xx

Girlies, do you know if your LH rises again ahead of your period? I tried looking online and there were conflicting answers!! I randomly tested with an OPK this morning as I thought I hadn’t done it since I ovulated (last weds/Thursday) and I wasn’t sure whether I needed to keep testing in the Premom app to get an idea of my trend / baseline. It’s much higher than it was at the start of my cycle - not quite a full on positive but if I hadn’t already ovulated I would look at it and think i would be headed for a positive tomorrow or so! Now I’m wondering will I ovulate twice!? Or is AF on her way? 😔 xx

@cupcakesandglitter aw hun you really have been through it all havent you! So so sorry, I had my 2nd on 14th February, a year after my first and I thought that traumatic! Really hope everything works out for you soon. I feel exactly the same, totally helpless, I have a DD who is 7 but I have the disadvantage of being older than most of the ladies here so I am really aware that my time is running out, fast!

Morning all x

@dippyegg32 aw hun, keeping everything crossed for you, how are you feeling today??? Really hope its just a "normal" bleed x

@Pettylamby, those symptoms sounds spot on!

@TheHotelCalifornia yea its funny hun how the tiniest thing sends us off, its all just so emotional!

Me, CD33 today, still nothing! Have had some cramps last couple of days and the area around my nipples at the bottom feels sore when pressed but thats about it!

Thankyou @PlantMummy87 @justwant2beamum @SuzieDeLaTour ❤️

@glowingtwig that's exactly how I'd describe it, I feel helpless. I feel sad and broken - I'm trying to tell myself the same thing but you're right, it is terrifying. It's the what ifs 😓 how old is your LO? Also if it helps I had cramping through most of the first trimester, it's the uterus stretching and letting that little bean stick - I can't seem to find your original post on in but hoping your scan goes well today ❤️

Does anyone measure their heart rate?