TTC 35+ Thread 7

Just an update on yesterday's ultrasound - no cysts of fibroids 🥳

10 DPO and I've not even POAS yet, or even thought about it. Aren't I doing well? 😂

Sending all the love to everyone with passed or poorly mums ❤️

Thanks for the clarification on the stick shapes @thislittlebird @Marvellouslymadmum - have almost taken the plunge on the spare sticks a couple of times. They wouldn’t have fit after all.

The time I conceived last time I had a weirdly late CD19 ov @Noodella18 (usually day 14/15) and I have had exactly the same this month so fingers crossed for you... and me!!

@Katiekattty @Farfaraway1 @KG1145 the loss of a mother will always feel fresh no matter how long ago it’s been. Life is so cruel. We all have to go through the cruelties of life but it’s a matter of when... unfortunately.

@SunAndSea37 I am sorry your mother’s not well. I hope she will be able to get through this. It always helps to talk about things in order to let things off one’s chest. Sending you all my love

[quote SunAndSea37]@Farfaraway1 thank you for that, my Mum has cancer too, been a huge shock and knocked me for 6. She's only in her sixties too and we are very close. It's hard embarking on two processes at the same time over which I have absolutely no control and I have been worrying a lot about which bits might end up coinciding (and the stress too so glad to hear the midwife said that). I waited SO LONG to meet DH and gutted that this is happened now I'm finally in a place where we can TTC as I want Mum to be a part of all of it. Have even had wobbles about carrying on at all!

Sending you lots of love on your anniversary, I don't know anyone else who is in this boat so it's really helpful to hear from you and @Katiekattty, sorry you've lost your Mum too xx[/quote]
Hope you're all OK.

@farfaraway1 it's a lovely idea to bake a cake on the anniversary. I lost my mom when I was 18 and then my nan who I was extremely close to 5 years ago. Even though it was a long time ago I've found going through ttc and pregnancy loss without them so hard and very lonely. We light a candle for each of them on special occasions and a while ago we started having a family day out on my mom's birthday to celebrate. Thinking of you today x

So sorry to hear your mum is ill @sunandsea37. Wishing her a speedy recovery x

I’ve just tested and I’ve finally got a high. So it looks like my bits are working. Although we got bad news today so I don’t know how DTD the next couple days will go. My DH has been in line for a promotion and huge pay rise since last year. They’ve just told him that they need to delay by a year because of the impact of covid. So we now have go back look at our financials.

@Farfaraway1 thank you for that, my Mum has cancer too, been a huge shock and knocked me for 6. She's only in her sixties too and we are very close. It's hard embarking on two processes at the same time over which I have absolutely no control and I have been worrying a lot about which bits might end up coinciding (and the stress too so glad to hear the midwife said that). I waited SO LONG to meet DH and gutted that this is happened now I'm finally in a place where we can TTC as I want Mum to be a part of all of it. Have even had wobbles about carrying on at all!

Sending you lots of love on your anniversary, I don't know anyone else who is in this boat so it's really helpful to hear from you and @Katiekattty, sorry you've lost your Mum too xx

@Noodella18 could be the stress of ttc and everything bad going on in the world as it can impact cycles, either shortening or lengthening them.

@twelvestars I've mainly been using premom but used the pink clearblue twice as a kind of double check, once on CD18 (blank) and once on CD19 (smiley) which also lined up with what I was seeing on the premom sticks. So pretty confident I've caught the surge 😎 my cycles are normally 28ish days so god knows what's going on 🤷‍♀️ hope your cycle is more reasonable this time round!

@Noodella18 basically my cycle ranged between 25-28 days but the last 2 cycles were a shorter 22 days with me ovulating CD11! But this time around I am already CD11 and haven’t seen a smiley yet (pink digital CB sticks) but based on the darkening line I saw today I expect a smiley within the next 24/36 hours. So I’m hoping my cycle is regulating back to usual and LP will be at least 10 days. I saw that beautiful follicle on US so I really don’t wanna miss on it 🤣🤣🤣 goodluck with yours and hope tonight will be the last night of dtd! I think you’ve got it covered! We need a rest haha I don’t know about you but my husband is having the best time of his life and I don’t think he would mind dtd most days of the month 😅

Which ov test do you use? How long is your cycle usually?

@Noodella18 loving the creaking geriatric mother's to be comment 😂👵 I used the chart for the first time last month and they tell you what day to test on mine as it's the connected ones that have the app so I did cd7 ⭕️ then cd8 flashing up to cd13 static then it said no more testing until next month, they should work fine with a gap

@Farfaraway1 that's lovely that you bake a cake to remind you of your mum! When we can my family all like to get together for a meal or bbq to remember my dad it's been tough the last year though

@Katiekattty Me too with the takeaway sauce pot!
And why on earth would someone want to do the OPK with their partner?! I'm not sure either of us would benefit from that scene, particularly if I'm expecting him to dtd afterwards! Mmm sexy!

@twelvestars sending positive egg-releasing thoughts your way! We had sex on CD 13 and then my surge was yesterday, CD 17 which isn't an ideal gap, but going to hopefully squeeze in another shag tonight. Please God tell me we don't have to do another one the next night

What CD are you on? How long is your luteal period normally? Sounds like you might be due on your period earlier than me...

@Geriatric1234 no I didn't do it from the correct day, but I actually don't think the reader is intelligent enough to do a baseline and measure from that. I know some people say that, but I can't see how that is true, and apparently you can use the same reader the next month with leftover sticks, which makes me think it is just reading individual sticks rather than measuring against baseline. I've heard some people say they get a solid smiley the first day they use them too. I'm not sure though because also a first time clearblue user, but I do wonder if clearblue might suggest you have to do that so you use more sticks...!
My reading went up to 0.85 on the premom cheapies later on in the evening and was still high this morning, so I'm pretty confident that I've finally had my surge, which is exciting! Had sex last night and have told partner to gird his loins for a final fandango tonight!
We were very lucky last time and got pregnant second cycle, hit it spot on in the second one. I'm wondering if we can hit the jackpot again this time!

@Noodella18 I forgot to add that I think you and I might be ovulating together this cycle and expecting today/tomorrow as well! In my case I’m hoping this delayed ovulation will push my cycle to its usual 25/28 days as it’s been a whacky 22 days the last two cycles. Fingers crossed for us!

@Noodella18 it’s sooo confusing I’ve read a couple of conflicted studies that advocate for either daily or every other day. But my consultant favors every other day except when nearing ovulation. Btw I peed this morning on the CB stick and my line is getting darker so might get my smiley soon. I’ll keep monitoring today and based on that we’ll either take a break today or not. Yes I’m guessing the pattern would be the same even for us over 35s!

@Noodella18 hey! Just saw your Q about OPK - did you use the CB from correct day or just once? Not sure you can trust result on it if you didn’t do all the days required to get correct baseline, as whatever the first reading of the month is it’ll take that as your negative. But eff knows as I’m new to them anyway!!!

@Farfaraway1 I can completely sympathise loosing my mum was one of the worst things I’ve even been through. It’s been 10yrs and I still struggle with it.

I think CBT is really down to who you have for a therapist. I’ve always seen good and bad reviews.

@Noodella18 I’ve designated one of those little sauce pots you get from the takeaway shops as my pee pot.
I was reading a Reddit post about whether you should do OPKs with your partner. I just can’t imagine my DH watching me pee in a sauce pot and dipping a stick in my wee.

@Farfaraway1 oh I'm so sorry, that sounds so tough :( and I'm really sorry that you don't get a chance to share your feelings about it very much - I imagine you may feel pressure to put a brave face on it so as not to come off as sad all the time? I'd love to hear more about your mum - tell me about her? What was her name? What was her favourite thing to bake? What did you like doing with her? xx

Aww thanks @Noodella18 💖 my mum loved to bake so I like to either make or buy a cake on the her passing anniversary and think of her. She passed late in the night so I find I’m ok during the day, although a bit tense, but closer to the time she passed I get a bit emotional. She was my best friend and I miss her every single day and that doesn’t lessen any as the days go by. I dream of her and feel her with me all the time 😔 life can be so unfair, she was only 63 and had so much living to do but I know she’s looking down on me and my little family and protecting us. Sorry for the emotional rant! I don’t often have someone ask me if I’m doing ok these days, I guess everyone thinks I’ve dealt with it by now.. 💖💖 x

@twelvestars hoping for a smiley for you today! I've read conflicting reports about the sperm thing some sources say the every other day thing is a myth which has been repeated so much that it's stuck 🤷‍♀️ I read this source which said that actually your odds are slightly higher with sex every day (provided no sperm issues). The figures were for under 30s and were 25% shot with every day and 22% every other day, so obviously chances not as high as that because we're creaking geriatric mother's to be, but I guess the pattern would be the same?

@farfaraway1 haha I totally get what you mean about seeing the other line! I also felt totally overjoyed when mine registered a good dark line after like 10 days of faint ones I was like YES body, go for it!! Really sorry to hear about your mum and hope that you're doing OK today on her anniversary. Do you have anything special planned or is it more a case of getting through it? Xx

@Twelvestars I'll have to look into that thank you

@Farfaraway1 sorry to hear about your mum, I lost my dad in a similar way 6 years ago and both my sisters were pregnant at the time, for a while I had all three in hospital as they both had complications too! It's definitely good you got a line and on the way to ov woohoo

Sorry.. me again... this is going to sound completely nuts.. but I bought my box of ovulation sticks today, couldn’t help but try one this afternoon 🙊 and I am ECSTATIC to see another line on it! I know this is interpreted as a negative result but I’ve been peeing on sticks for MONTHS without ever seeing another line, so I’m so happy to see one even though it’s a (negative) ovulation test 🤣🤪

@SunAndSea37 so sorry to hear your mum isn’t well 😞 I lost my mum to cancer 3 years ago as of tomorrow. Before she passed she told me I would have another baby.. while my mum was unwell I was pregnant at the time and very stressed, my midwife told me then not to worry about the stress impacting the baby at all. Not sure what I’m trying to say - I guess that you will fall pregnant when the time is right, and try not to stress about stressing about it if you know what I mean 😂 fingers crossed for your next cycle and sending lots of love, hugs and strength to you and your mum. 💖 x

@KG1145 CONGRATS!!! Amazing line 😍

Thanks @thislittlebird 😁 although I'm a kiwi I used to live in the UK for about 7 years and my partner is British ☺️ There’s probably some kind of website discussion board for kiwis TTC but I like you ladies 😘 x the only problem is the time difference, so when I wake up in the mornings I have to catch up on everything that’s happened on the thread while I’ve been sleeping 😂