TTC 35+ Thread 7

Hey folks,

Quickly popping in to link this really useful and POSITIVE and - most excitingly - RECENT (compared to what’s normally cited...I SEE YOU 1700’S FRANCE!) study shared on another thread. Now, this is a very academic and dry long read, but the most important thing to focus on is what they found out. In a study of 346 women (pretty decent size group), ranging in age from 20-something to 44, they found that age (alone) had NO SIGNIFICANT IMPACT on the chances of becoming pregnant.

Grab a cup of tea and enjoy a long read: academic.oup.com/humrep/article/18/9/1959/708200

Few things I took away from this:

1 - Age is not as big of a deal as we have been made to think. It has been ASSUMED to impact fertility, but no-one has actually bothered checking.
2 - They use one year of TTC as a base level, so if you aren’t at that point yet - try and not stress yourself out.
3 - If you are over a year you can and should get fertility investigations done and any doctor that won’t refer you due to age is not acting professionally.
4 - It doesn’t detail pregnancy outcomes, so as a 42 year old, I’m steeling myself for nature to potentially make a decision or two on any further pregnancy outcomes until we find the perfect egg. (I had an early MC in December, was sad but ‘fine’ as no worse than my already awful periods).

I know i sound like a broken record sometimes, but this TTC malarkey is just a roulette wheel and we are spinning every month to get that one good egg. It can happen for everyone, and if it doesn’t you still have ways of becoming a parent.

On another thread a fertility clinic (COUGH - TRYING TO FLOG IVF- COUGH) told a 41 year old woman that her chances of conceiving were under 1% a month....BALLS. It’s nearer 20% but nature will filter out the unviables.

It’s essential to remember that the medical profession still doesn’t even use women’s bodies as a standard in textbooks, so why would they bother investigating ‘women’s issues’ like babies?!

Anyway, that’s my vent for the day! I’m totally snowed under with work and utterly incapable of keeping up, BUT I am lurking and sending lots of love to all here. Welcome newbies! xxxx

Thanks @Farfaraway1 ❤️
Just spoke to the dr, she is hopeful this is just a bad reaction and withdrawal after 9 years and even the possibility my period has joined in too... I have a prescription for some of the stuff to help the bleeding (can't remember the name!) so hopefully will sort itself out xx

Premom App advice needed... it’s the first time I’ve used this app and am using the tests function to take pictures of my ovulation tests. But does it work better if you use the premom or easy at home ovulation tests? Reason I ask.. I’m taking photos of my ‘other brand’ tests and the results seem to be all over the show! On one picture the reading will be low, if I take another photo of the same test it says it’s high with a completely different ratio figure?! So I can essentially just keep taking a photo of the same test until I get a result I feel happy with 😂 So confused 🤷🏻‍♀️

@Lexber so sorry you’re having such a rough time of it! You go ahead and talk about bleeding all you like! 💖 I remember after I had a D&C, the following week I passed a huge clot, it was just awful!! Sounds like a great idea for you to ask for help now. If nothing else, it sounds like it’s starting to affect your day to day life and that’s no way to be. Let us know how you get on with the GP x

@Twelvestars great article! Thanks for sharing! X

@Lexber bless him! It helps when our men are positive and upbeat about it. I can imagine it’s putting you down but fingers crossed there’s always a solution to most problems so it’s just a matter of time. It’s hard I know when we’re all feeling like time is flying by but hopefully it will happen for you and all of us in good time.

@Twelvestars so did I...! But the last one was worst than ever so def time to ask for help as it's starting to get me down. I was so excited to start our journey and my OH even got excited last night, to the point he proudly declared "that's the one, I've got a feeling first time lucky" 🤣🤣🤣 oh if only he knew what we all know... 😜🤣

It's so frustrating oh well, there's plenty of time yet! And I like even numbers so a 2022 baby would work for me...🤣🤣

@02Carol right! It was truly eye opening for me as well. So I really love to share this article around because it negates a lot of false information and outdated statistics and it promotes more recent studies that offer a more realistically positive outlook.

@Lexber sorry you’re bleeding again. I thought based on your earlier comments that you’re done with it. It’s good you’re seeking medical advice. I’m sure they’ll give you some reassurance and probably meds to stop the bleeding. I wish I had any idea about coils and coil removal to offer any advice or support. But I hope this will be sorted soon 🤞🏻

@Katiekattty I've read up on my spotting, and I think it's likely ovulation spotting, which is rare (5%), never had it before, but timing is right. Especially with left ovary pain.

So dtd tonight, think no point from tomorrow

That will mean dtd cd8,10, 12,14,16 prob ov 16. So that all sounds fairly good (tho would have dtd yesterday too without silly opk!!)

@climbershell I would go for it. I always get cramps ewcm and usually a day or two after cm changes.

Omg at last I've finally got a bit of ewcm! Cd16, tho another v small bright red dot

Do we think I'll probably ov tomorrow or tue? Mild left side possible ovary pains

Guess push OH to dtd tonight, tomorrow and tues?

@Twelvestars

Thank you for the article link, really interesting read.

'Rarely mentioned is the source of the data: French birth records from 1670 to 1830.'

🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ No wonder we are all stressed about facts and figures!

@Kitekat81 I'm a terrible sleeper, move a lot, wake up lots, sometimes get up, so I don't feel it's worth temping, I feel that will be just too in effect and stressful for me

We'll try again tonight, different positions & OH said hips were killing from his first jog in a year yesterday, so didn't want to move much which is probably why he couldn't finish lol. He's done some stretching and aches less now lol. Will then dtd tue & Thurs (cd20), just to cover all bases & keep opk-ing.

@Marvellouslymadmum they worked well for my friend and bunch of others so thought worth a shot as a fraction of the price as the clear blue, but if not successful this cycle will definitely try clear blue next!

I'm getting a few v mild cramps again just now. No idea if ovulation related!! Guess at least if I don't get a peak, or any cm, I'll have no idea how many dpo I am so least likely to symptom spot or poas 🤣

Well since my photo I've had a massive bleed/clot (sorry tmi) 😩 my body hates me! Feeling shitty as, my back aches, stomach feels yucky and I feel generally down and fed up of it all.
Sorry to bring the thread down esp being so new, I feel like all I talk about is bleeding?!

I'm going to ring the drs tomorrow to enquire about tranexamic acid I think it is? As I feel wiped out and I'm now on day 12 of bleeding - it seemed to drop off then wham! And I've seen a. Few posts when I've searched mentioning that helped lots.

My apps both seem to be showing ov around 24th, so will be interesting to see if it matches up but thats with my bleeding starting on 10th from removal.

Roll on normality xx

Trying again it didn’t seem to post before

I’m just catching up on everything.
I have ovulation pain and then I’m pretty sure I ovulate because a day or so after CM changes.

@Lexber these are mine this is mine

@Lexber looks like you might be starting your surge? I'd be tempted to test again just before bed.

Thanks @Noodella18 that's great I've started tracking mine but wasn't sure how high the numbers would be going etc so to actually see someone else's helps me loads as I'm so clueless - please still others share as it will be great to see these and start to understand more!
As far as my cycle/apps if this bleed is AF then I'm due to ovulate in a few days... so Altho still bleeding on/off I have started to track to see what is happening. Still early days but looks like a possibility this month still??

@Lexber

@JessWi @sickofthisyear I like to go by this article below👇🏻 Yes the odds are lower as we age and a lot of variables and conditions come to play when it comes to conception, but a lot of the stats we see in popular articles online and websites are citing archaic and outdated studies from the 17th and 18 centuries and these have stuck around and continued to be quoted and cited without any attempt at correcting and updating these stats. I was feeling so low and down until I came across the below article and then speaking with my consultant, she uplifted my spirits and gave me more hope than the panic and fear mongering spread by online articles and websites. Of course there is a progressive correlation between infertility and age but infertility is also present in very young women. Sometimes it’s just down to luck. Btw, my sister in law got pregnant by mistake at age 43.

www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2013/07/how-long-can-you-wait-to-have-a-baby/309374/?single_page=true

@Twelvestars yes I'm definitely open to ivf if we need it just hoping we don't lol plus I'll probably feel different if I get to 45 and we still haven't managed out bfp haha

@Lexber I believe there are a few apps that can take pics for you and asses premom Femometer glow to name a few, I couldn't get a good reading on them for me though so not much use sorry.

@JessWi yes I totally agree, there are some interesting articles about the decline in fertility with age and it's not as bad as some people make out but does obviously make a difference, mainly due to egg quality I believe

That’s really interesting thank you. It seems a little unfair that age can cause such a large decline. I’m 35 and like to keep myself in good shape, I’m guessing there are lots of 35+ women who are in much better physical shape than a lot of 20 something ladies!

Has anyone got pictures of their OPK charts and sticks so I can see what happens as it increases towards ovulation so I can see what look at/for please
I remember seeing somewhere a picture off the app that had the scanned ones with the figures and low or high with them.
Also the charts to go with to give me an idea show it works as it's all so nee to me xx

[quote Marvellouslymadmum]@Twelvestars yes that's right, sorry if I wasn't clear. I believe some ivf clinics in this country have a cut off of about 45 some higher plus other countries it's higher but I feel I probably wouldn't go on passed that anyway 🤷🏼‍♀️

It's like a rollercoaster of emotions each month isn't it?!
Af - ho hum, here we are again, sulking and then excitement at another month!
fw - woohoo dtd here we come, let's try, AGAIN to make a baby! I'm knackered 😂
Ov - omg I hope we've done it this month and we are lucky
Tww - I'm not going to test, I'm not going to test, I'm not going to - ooh google said my twitchy eye may mean I'm pregnant! maybe have been lucky this month let's test early and find out! Bfn oh maybe it's to early, bfn bfn bfn bfn af
Af - 😔 and here we go again! [/quote]
Hahaha love this round up of emotions! You’re spot on! It’s such a roller coaster of a swathe of emotional ups and downs and lefts and rights.

Anyways honestly anybody would want a BFP the natural way or with a little bit of help without having to go through IVF and all the accompanying hormonal shots and meds. Personally I am open to IVF and grateful that there is such an option (which has changed so many couples’ lives and made them parents) but I am still hoping it happens naturally for us...

@JessWi I believe the chances if everything is as it should be and you have no issues and neither does your oh are around 20-22% depending on ages. But yes like @sickofthisyear said there are lots of hurdles to get over even to get to that stage! It's jot great odds, that's why they say most people with no issues should fall of with if 1-2 years

No of course I don't mind, I haven't got my referral through yet so they've not actually booked any tests but from talking to the others and gp it should be amh and afc then potentially others if I have pcos then may be prescribed clomid or The like depending on outcome