TTC #2 over 40

AF arrived today (CD20) a week early. I’m now thinking there might be something in the breastfeeding theory - thanks @Jem1979, that article was enlightening. My daughter has upped her milk intake this month quite a lot so it seems fitting that my cycle has subsequently gone haywire.

So, I’ve decided to get on top of things. Today I have reached out to a breastfeeding support network for advice on stopping. I also bought some opks and It Starts With The Egg and am looking into the SMEP. I’m feeling really positive now.

Good luck to everyone who’s trying ✨

Thank you @Jem1979. I will take a look 😊

Aw @Cashewcookie, it’s so hard.

Thank you @Jem1979. Yes, logically I know the breastfeeding isn’t the problem but when you’re trying and not succeeding everything seems like it could be a reason! I wish we knew more about our own bodies. Your story is giving me hope ☺️

I take a preconception vitamin. I am thinking I will start with the opks and embrace the madness. It would be a shame to not conceive because I am guessing the wrong ovulation date 😬😂

Thank you @Jem1979 and @Lunaberry1979.

Deflated today, I know you all understand. I’m 43, feel unfit, old, tired, creaky and fed up. I feel angry and sad too. My son said the other day he wished he had a sibling. He has a wonderful life and I know it’s all fate at the end of the day but this is bloody hard.

Sigh.

Oh it is so sad sometimes, feeling the hope and then the disappointment, again. I’m with you there @welshmercury and @Cashewcookie. Welcome @alliejay81

Before my post a couple of women had BFPs in this thread which is wonderful. It is definitely possible x

Can I join too please? Only just turned forty, trying for DC2. DS is 12 though, so slightly different situation here! Been trying off and on for a decade without success so this feels like the last try!

Got a bfn this morning and gutted. Don’t want to go through this month after month. Full of regret.

42 here. Have a nearly 12 yo and then a surprise pregnancy last Jan 2020 that ended in TMFR. Was desperate to try again but hubby said no. We were going to try finally this month then both got the text for Covid jab. I had my jab today and one of the questions is could you be pregnant. I broke down.
I just want to be pregnant before the first anniversary of our little hero of 18+6w comes round.
What is SMEP?
I’m tracking ovulation as weird cycle.

Hi - I’d like to join your discussion.

I’m in the same boat, I’m 41 and have been ttc #2 for a year. I’m finding each disappointment harder and harder. Baby #1 was conceived in the second month of trying so I feel like my age is the issue but lots of women conceive fine in their early forties.

I am still breastfeeding (dd is 2.5) but my periods started when she was 8 months old so I don’t think this is a problem (or is it??). The fact that dd still sleeps in our bed is probably the biggest issue as my partner and I really struggle to create the time and space to have sex 🙄 I am resisting testing for ovulation because I don’t want ttc to completely take over my life and mental health, but maybe that’s crazy because maybe it would really help us conceive... !

Sigh. Thanks for the thread and your posts, it’s nice hearing about others going through the same thing.

Ah I feel like that sometimes too @gizmo167 but then look at @Jem1979 - it could just happen anytime, who knows what our bodies are up to?! And you have the same cut off as me - summer (end of June for me) so still a few months of ttc left, but in the meantime I am starting to focus on the many advantages of being a family of 3 in case it doesn't happen - however, in more positive news from around the globe my friend in New Zealand has a 6 month old (her second) and she's 45! So we are all spring chickens in comparison!

Thanks girls for the positivity, just really feeling its just too late for me, I'll be 43 next week, took a year after the first mc to get a BFP so its really looking like the end of the road! Thinking I should just pack it all in now!

Also @Twothirtyam @Cashewcookie @PankhurstTastic @gizmo167 @Jem1979 some other good news is that Christine Bleakley just gave birth with her 2nd at 42 - flying the flag for us all! :-)

Yes please @Jem1979 how did you do it

@Jem1979 woohoo!!! Brilliant news!! So happy for you! What a great feeling that is!! Did you say you did SMEP for this cycle - any hints or tips welcome

@gizmo167 oh CD31 and still no AF, I will cross everything for you just in case! Sorry to hear your OH is very pragmatic about your mc's, like you say, after an mc all anyone needs is a hug and been told that everything will be OK. Sometimes we really have to spell it out to our OH's, mine is certainly a constant work in progress!

@Jem1979 wow big congrats lovely!!!

@41FerrisWheels aw hun hes very much a whatever is to be type of man and lives in his own wee bubble most of the time lol! I just want to scream sometimes that I'm hurting and for him to tell me its all ok but I know that wont happen so I just withdraw into myself, I've been used to doing that all my life!

CD31 for me today, just want to know now, totally convinced this isnt my month anyhow, feeling a bit more crampy today, just like AF so if its coming just come then!! Feeling totally fed up with it all!

@Jem1979 absolutely amazing news! Congratulations and all the best! Good to hear positive news.

Yep, the similarities between period pains and early pregnancy symptoms are tres confusing when you're ttc and not at all helpful! Although I've only ever had sore boobs before a BFP and it's also the first thing to stop before an MC for me, but the other usual suspects; cramping, lower back ache, fatigue etc have come with both.
@gizmo167 does he not talk about the MC's as he's upset about them or that he's worried it will upset you? My OH didn't really know what to say apart from offering lots of cuddles but I suppose it is strange for them as they're disappointed too but feel they can't be sad or down about it as we go though the physical side and have all the hormone crap to deal with, he tried to talk to one of his friends about it but he said he just changed the subject as a way to distract him as hadn't been through it himself...I wonder if there's a Dadsnet? That would be a good way for the Dad's to chat about things they are feeling but that their close friends may not necessarily understand.
In other ttc news: I have failed miserably at the SMEP this time, very hit and miss although I did ttc on Mother's Day as I thought it must be a sign I was ovulating on such a significant date!

Just checking in, cd28 for me today, feel a bit of cramping, absolutely no sore boobs, which doesn't surprise me as it's one thing I noticed after the first mc always had sore boobs before af but since the first mc only a few times, weird!

Know what you mean @41FerrisWheels I'm the same, summer is my cut off & I'm not hopeful at all, took a year to get a bfp between first mc & this one & I just dont have that time anymore!

My oh doesn't even talk about the mc's!