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Original poster

TTC after miscarriage

311 replies

lamby12 · 05/01/2021 13:39

Hi just wondered if anyone had any experience of continuing TTC after miscarriage. I had a loss at 5/6 weeks recently. The bleeding has now stopped (about 3 days clear) and I'm starting to feel back to normal physically. Emotionally I'm gutted as we have been trying for so long and a few close relatives who know have said we should wait a while to recover emotionally/physically.
Whilst I agree, I've also read that you're most fertile after a miscarriage and it's taken 18months of inconsistent ovulation/low hormones for me to get pregnant. I don't want to miss what could be an increased chance when my odds are low ordinarily.
The hospital said I should wait until a normal period for dating reasons only, they said nothing about risk of infection or complications getting pregnant straight away. I have no idea when I would ovulate (if) now.
Any experience out there?

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AmyFr · 15/03/2021 06:58

@lamby12 oh bless you. Fingers crossed for you. I’m glad they have subsided. Fingers crossed this is the last of them. Do you have your appointment this week too? You can ask there too and hopefully get some reassurance.

@SG121 sorry, I realised I didn’t reply. I’m glad your scan went well - I bet that was amazing! 🥰 hope you are still doing well.

School was crazy and chaotic as usual. Teaching with a mask on is ok too. I am going to struggle this week as tiredness has set in and nausea has started rearing its head. The midwife phoned my yesterday to book me in for booking appointment in two weeks. It was the same midwife I had when I had my daughter, which is nice!

Original poster
lamby12 · 14/03/2021 20:29

Thanks @AmyFr so I am still ok, the pain got really bad last night but nothing has happened yet and it seems to have eased off. Keeps coming back like little stitches and cramps but nothing as full blown as last night. It literally felt like my uterus was contracting, but no blood, so let's hope it was stretching and just feels the same.

I deffo didn't have this last time so I hope that's a good thing and this is a sign of things getting bedded in. I'm not as panicked as I was but still haven't full abandoned panic stations yet....!

If I can get through another full week I'll have made it past the last miscarriage which feels like a milestone.

Hope everyone else is doing ok.

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AmyFr · 13/03/2021 20:24

@lamby12 sending you 🤗 pregnancy is so nerve wracking after a loss.

I think if it is different to your miscarriage, then that is good.

I definitely had period pains with my daughter because I remember feeling them and thinking “oh well that doesn’t mean that anymore; I can just forget about them.” I was very chilled and oblivious. Your uterus will be expanding and stretching though so period pains are definitely normal too.

I will be thinking of you. It’s so crap when all you can do is wait. 🤗

Original poster
lamby12 · 13/03/2021 20:05

Thanks @AmyFr yes everything online says period pains are to be expected. I don't remember if I had them with DD who is now 2.5. I don't think I did with my miscarriage /l- the bleeding came out of nowhere so I'm hoping that means this isn't the same.

It keeps coming and going, like me period pains do. It's basically like mild contractions at the front, no back pain, which is what's worrying me because this is what I have when bleeding usually, because it's the uterus contracting.

Thanks for your reply. I've taken some paracetamol, preparing myself for the worst just in case. All I can do is wait.
X

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AmyFr · 13/03/2021 19:54

Tommy’s also says this: “ You may also have some period-like cramping in these early weeks”

AmyFr · 13/03/2021 19:51

Oh @lamby12 I’m so sorry you are going through this.

I have had pains but I wouldn’t call them extreme. They have been milder than my period pains. I had bad PGP in my last pregnancy later on and I have had some pain and aches a bit like this which is apparently ‘round ligament pain.’ I’m not sure that is what you are describing though, as you mention cramping and this is more of an ache (for me anyway). From my pregnancy with my daughter, I remember constantly feeling that my period was coming and crampy though.

What I would say is that it is so easy to jump to the worst assumption and everyone experiences pain differently. If you are experiencing extreme pain though I would ask to be checked out just to be safe because of things like ectopic... I think I read that pain can also be in your shoulder though so might not be relevant. Can you phone 111 for advice? Has the pain subsided at all? Implantation causes cramps and must still be ongoing at this stage too.

Sending you the biggest hugs.

Original poster
lamby12 · 13/03/2021 19:31

Thanks @SG121 and @AmyFr

Tonight I'm feeling really worried as I have EXTREME cramps just like period pains. Up to now it's been lots of twinges but it's suddenly like what I get at the height of my period and when I was miscarrying. No blood right now though.

You ladies that have also had a recent positive, have you had anything like this? I'm really worried it's coming to an end because of these pains. I'm 4 weeks and 1 day so not even got very far yet.

X

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SG121 · 10/03/2021 18:50

@lamby12 congratulations! Sending lots of positivity to you... It’s totally normal to be wary after what we’ve gone through. Got my fingers crossed for you!
@AmyFr the scan went great thank you! I was 3 days behind what I thought I was but she said that’s normal so I was 7w5d when I had the scan and I saw the heartbeat. It was amazing but I’m still nervous so not going online as much. ( haven’t caught up on this post at all and trying to stay off certain stuff as it makes my nerves worse ) but trying to stay positive. I’ve started feeling very nauseous too. Not all day thank god- I’m glad that I feel it as, like you said, it’s reassuring but when I feel it I hate it 😂 how are you doing? How was it being back in school? I go back full time Monday with all the kids in x

AmyFr · 10/03/2021 18:07

@Absy sending you hugs, and thinking of you. It is so hard when other people announce. Be kind to yourself. I have found this month strange as lots of people have announced for September.

Fingers crossed for you too in the TWW. I hope it passes quickly!

@lamby12 Thinking of you too. Those lines look really good! Hopefully the consultant is helpful when you see them, and gives you some good advice. I have fingers crossed. It is so hard trying to protect yourself and prepare yourself for the worst, while hoping for the best.

@Icklemissgem ooh good luck. Fingers crossed for you!

@SG121 how was your private scan? Hope all is ok. I am tempted but will wait to see midwife (hopefully).

I felt a bit sick this morning, which hopefully is a good sign. Although it could just be tiredness... My daughter had me up since before 4am... typical as it was my first day back at in person teaching. So tired. I keep trying to remember what I felt with her. I think next week (6 weeks) I started throwing up 😆 but I am looking forward to it for some reassurance... I did do the other digital in my box on Saturday or Sunday and it said 2-3 without first morning wee, so all seems well.

Sending hugs to you all!

Original poster
lamby12 · 10/03/2021 17:35

Thanks @Absy no there's no sooner appointment with the consultant, she's really busy. That's interesting, I thought the progesterone was only an issue for the first trimester? I don't know though, I just thought that after week 12ish the placenta takes over rather than hormones and that's why things become a bit safer. X

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Absy · 10/03/2021 17:23

Thanks for your sympathy! Today has just felt a bit rough.

If you can wait, try and see the consultant. It hve you called to see if they could see you sooner? I don’t think GPs would have the right level of knowledge about what to prescribe and how much. For the pregnancy that didn’t work out, I was given a prescription for Lubion which is a progesterone injection, and I was due to take it until week 12. Hopefully the consultant could advise something like that

Original poster
lamby12 · 10/03/2021 10:26

@Absy I'm sorry about that. It's really tough other friends announcing. I feel like a lot of people around me are having babies too (5 friends/family in May) so I know if this one doesn't work out I'll really struggle in April and May.

I don't think I can get anything via the GP as the GP hasn't 'officially' diagnosed anything and hasn't really been helpful. The private consultant we are seeing independently has been the one that has said she believes there are issues with my hormones. We have an appoint with her about our stating IVF next (when I will be 5 weeks if I make it that far) so I'm keeping the appointment in. For the reason that it may not work out this time and also because I want to ask if there is any suggestion to support the early pregnancy.

Do you think I should speak to the GP? I'm not sure if they would suggest anything because it was my private tests and much more complex hormone blood tests that suggested problems in the consultants eyes. I actually tried to speak to the GP about the results and they seemed about bit out of their depth to be honest. So I feel like I just need to hope on this one probably. X

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Absy · 10/03/2021 10:05

Hi @lamby12 those look like strong lines!

Is the consultant able to give you any progesterone to help out?

Today has been a bit rough. I’m in the 2WW. I think everything went well, but I think that every month. I found out another friend is pregnant. I’m really happy for her, but I just feel like it’s unfair. We had talked about falling pregnant before and she was always saying things like “oh yes, I think I’ll have another child” whereas I was always more circumspect, never wanted to assume that it was going to work out. Another friend had a baby on Monday so it literally feels like everyone around me is falling pregnant and not me. I feel I have to tell DH about her, but I know he’ll be upset.

Original poster
lamby12 · 10/03/2021 09:57

@Icklemissgem oh great that's promising that you've just had a faint line. Good luck with the pessaries, I really hope that they work for you.

This is such a painful wait to see if things will continue isn't it. X

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Icklemissgem · 10/03/2021 08:08

@lamby12 thank you, I actually got a vvvvv faint line on a test this morning so will start the pessaries tonight and am just hoping they work - I can't deal with it a 4th time 😞😞

Wow that is a very strong line so it definitely looks promising. Crossing everything for you this time around - let us know how it's going xx

Original poster
lamby12 · 10/03/2021 07:13

Thanks @Icklemissgem

I hope you're doing ok, I was sorry to read about your 3 chemicals, that's so awful for you and especially as they can't find anything wrong. The pessaries sound promising, so hopefully you have no problem getting pregnant and it's not long for you before you can try these.

I am worried about another chemical because after my blood tests the private consultant said I am low in progesterone and my hormones aren't coordinating well to support early pregnancy. So I'm not taking anything for granted. A nice strong FRER this morning so I'm happy that it's getting darker. This happened last time though!

TTC after miscarriage
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Icklemissgem · 09/03/2021 17:03

@lamby12 crossing everything for you but a strong line is definitely promising.

@AmyFr thank you, hoping this month is my month, currently 8dpo and waiting to test in a few days and if BFP will start the pessaries and keep fingers and toes crossed 🤞🏻 can't deal with a 4th one 😩😩
Congratulations on your BFP xxx

Original poster
lamby12 · 09/03/2021 17:01

Thanks @AmyFr I have been thinking about it a lot today, keep trying to stop obsessing. I'm really trying not to let myself get too whipped up in it and seeing it as just one step on a long road, trying to see it more as a scientific process than an emotional thing this time, I know that sounds weird but if we do ivf (which is the next step) then we would still have this really fragile wait, if it worked, to get to 7 weeks which is when you have a scan from ivf. So, I'm trying to just see it as a process like we would if it were ivf.

I don't know if that makes sense. My heads all over the place. Just want to get to Friday for 4 weeks then I'll feel great if I can get past 5 weeks which was when I lost last time. We have consultant appointments and ivf information session over the next few weeks and I'm still keeping it all in, going (virtually) to it all as I think that's my coping mechanism this time. Planning for 'afterwards' on the assumption it won't last. That sounds really pessimistic but it's the mindset I need this time to protect myself.

I'm so glad you're still doing well and that you've started to feel some symptoms now, that must be reassuring. X

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AmyFr · 09/03/2021 16:49

@lamby12 oooh this is amazing!!! Fingers crossed for you! I am just over 5 weeks now (and starting to feel it with the fatigue!). I’m so pleased for you. Crossing all my fingers!

I am still scared each time I wipe...

🤗

And welcome @Icklemissgem I hope they help. Bless you for going through so many. I will have fingers crossed for you.

Original poster
lamby12 · 09/03/2021 13:38

Thanks you @Emilou89 I know exactly what you mean about being robbed of the excitement, it's now just worry and anxiety as we know what can go wrong. I feel like I'm slightly more mentally prepared for it going wrong this time, but it's easy to say that.

I got my FRER today. Quite a strong one with lunchtime diluted wee so I'm happy with that. At the moment I'm just thinking small aims - like get to Friday which will be 4 weeks.

Everything crossed, good luck everyone. X

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Emilou89 · 09/03/2021 12:58

Thank you for the lovely message and welcome @AmyFr this seems a lovely thread of people (despite the topic!)
@lamby12 good luck lovely this sounds positive. I'm excited for you to get your FRER's so keep us posted. Sadly we've been robbed of the pure excitement but as hard as it is take it one day at a time for now and for every day let yourself be excited for the present time! (easier said than done!) X

Original poster
lamby12 · 09/03/2021 09:59

Thanks @Absy feeling really on a knife edge expecting blood any minute. I did another test yesterday aft and it was also faint positive. I am going to get some FRER today.

I had pulling weird pains last night in my lower stomach so I'm hoping that's a good thing, it didn't feel like period pains. Eeeeeek so scared about another early loss.

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Absy · 08/03/2021 19:56

Hi @Icklemissgem

Welcome!

I unfortunately have a lot of experience with cyclogest. It’s not pleasant, but they’re doable (better than injecting progesterone). I would just recommend either going for the back entrance or wearing pantie liners if you go for the other entrance

Absy · 08/03/2021 19:54

I’m normally sucky at trying to see faint lines on MN, but this time I definitely see a line. It’s faint but it’s there.

I hope this is good news for you @lamby12!

Could you go to the doctor and have a blood test done?

Original poster
lamby12 · 08/03/2021 09:08

Ok the more I look at the real test the more it looks like a clear line. We dtd 4 days before I ov'd I think, I didn't even think we were in with a chance this month?! Literally since I did the test I now have period pains and a feeling like there must be some blood there.... is that psychosomatic!! I am not getting even vaguely carried away yet. More tests needed and very much need to prepare myself for bleeding. X

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