Any mums in 40's ttc?

@kalidasa I've had all the tests done that have been offered, just a matter of saving up and trying whilst waiting 🤞🏻

Sorry you were feeling so low at the weekend @sabtom Could you start the ball rolling with some basic investigations even if you can't do IVF at this point? Or have you already had the basic stuff done? Sorry for you too @FeatherInTheBreeze

@oldiefogie congratulations on your pregnancy how are you feeling now any calmer or still a bit panicked? I was very, very ill in both pregnancies pretty much immediately so DH and I are both pretty scared to be honest. Weird feeling -- I would so love another baby but can't pretend I'm not pretty frightened of what it would mean if I do get pregnant. Pretty sure I have not yet ovulated this month though will probably be fairly soon.

@sabtom I'm sorry that's another month where it didn't happen for you. It is a stab in the heart. I am almost 40 and TTC for 6 months since my mc at 13 weeks. My DH doesn't understand. He walks around whistling and I walk around angry at everything. This is my fertile window and I don't know if I should try or not this month. I feel like it won't happen anyway so maybe I should just save myself the heartache?

AF arrived today Coming up 2 years TTC now (1 MMC in that time) and every month AF arrives it feels like it such a stab in the heart. I don't know if it's PMT but I just feel so upset and angry and I want to hate everyone around me, specially those who have kids or who are pregnant. I even feel bitter towards my OH. It feels like he doesn't feel as upset as me, when I tell him AF arrived he just gives me a pitiful sigh and 'aww I'm sorry' then just goes about his day! He's reluctant to go for IVF because it's so expensive and because nothing is technically wrong with us (just our age, 41) he seems to think we'll get pregnant eventually!
I'm just having a really sh*t day.

@consideringachange
Similar situation here. Also two fairly grim pregnancies and a terrible second birth. Two boys. DH was keen for a third and something about the pandemic (nowhere to go, nothing to do!) made me think last month that maybe we could try. Had sex last month without a condom but only after ovulation so wasn't any chance of getting pregnant. Carried on this month and even though my period is still six days away I just got a faint line on a test. Agh!!! I'm nearly 42.

Realise it may very well come to nothing but I have to say that I'm now shitting myself and wondering WTF I just did. Somehow all of the pregnancy/birth stuff has come flooding back in an instant. Terrified. These are not easy choices!

@timeforanother1 I've been using the clear blue ones. Ovulation dates have been pretty consistent but I've had two months where it's been a few days out (including this month) so I'd have stopped DTD so frequently if I wasn't testing.

Sorry realise I have confusingly changed my name mid-thread -- I am @consideringachange

Oh and you can also know by checking the position, open/closed-ness and consistency of your cervix, but I have never been able to reliably reach the wretched thing so never bothered with that. Most women can though I think!

@timeforanother1 re: ovulation, the main signs for me are increasingly fertile cervical fluid (first watery and then the distinctive "egg-white" fluid the last day or so before ovulation) and, tbh, libido! I tracked my cycles for years for contraception and it actually worked well for me though the one thing I thought those methods weren't really honest enough about is that they rely on you not having sex for exactly the week when you most want to

I use OPKs, I'm 42 and don't really have the time left to hope we are DTD at the right time.

I'm just coming up to ovulation I think -- probably sometime between tomorrow and the middle of next week. I'm trying not to obsess about it too much though. Is everyone else charting their temps, or using some sort of ovulation predictor / detection thing? I charted for years (for contraception mostly) so I know how to do it but not sure I want to go down that road. It's always really obvious when I am ovulating anyway.

I’m only on cd4 x

Fingers crossed for you!

I'm 11/12dpo. Usually my LP is 11 days but last month was 14 days, so I don't intend on testing till I get to 14dpo.

Where is everyone in their cycle? I think I'm 4dpo.

Hello everyone. I'm 40 and I've just (this morning!) had my coil taken out. I've got two boys already who are 5 and 7. It's taken us a long time to decide about trying for a third because I had very complicated pregnancies so it's potentially a pretty big undertaking -- I was in hospital a lot in the first half of both pregnancies and in a wheelchair in the second half. I'm aware I might be too old now anyway but I really want to give it a go at least. I think if I am too old DH will be quite relieved to be honest! He's not against the idea of a third but he is pretty terrified of the pregnancy. Anyway, I've promised not to talk to him about it much unless or until I am definitely pregnant so I thought it would be a good idea to join one of these threads for a bit of solidarity.

I have two children.My cycles have been quite irregular. I have had months with nothing and then times when it,s been 2 wks on 2wks off. I try to keep an eye on things.

@timeforanother1 I just have a feeling in my gut that I am less fertile and will struggle to conceive this time. I can’t put a finger on why I feel that. We have already tried for two cycles since the mmc and I have never waited this long before (I have been v v v lucky I know).

I did another IC cheapy today (9dpo) and it was BFN.

Yes bfn for me so patiently and calmly awaiting af to show to start a new cycle xxx

Hi @Feminmister sorry for your loss but great that you have been able to fall so quickly. I am 11 or 12 dpo. Thank you for your comment I just can’t get excited. I am 40, 41 in jan and have had 2 mc. Last one in April and a chemical last month. Fingers crossed for you. I am constantly knicker checking as af due Monday or Tuesday never ever late so time will tell..... xxx

Hi, I’m 42, TTC number 4 after a mmc in June. I feel much less fertile since the mmc so I’m not sure we will be lucky this time. Prior to the miscarriage I conceived four times v quickly. I’m currently 8dpo so we will see soon for this month.

@Idreamof2more those look like faint positives to me. ICs are crap so I’d be hopeful with these despite the negatives on the ICs. What dpo are you now?