Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40

It’s a difficult decision to make @october1979. I guess see what the consultant says. Surely if your results are looking ok you have a bit of time to try naturally. Have you tried temping? I used ovusense when conceiving DS and found it amazing at precisely pinpointing ovulation. It’s not great for predicting when but it shows it definitely happened and which day with the temperature shift. My husband is up early for work so my sleep can be disrupted. Wearing the sensor allowed more reliable results than a thermometer. It was interesting to see on the occasional cycle I’d get a peak but not ovulate. I’m not sure I’d have got pregnant without it. It’s handy also for seeing how long your luteal phase is. If this is short it can make it trickier to get pregnant. I think there’s supplements for this if needed. Xx

Ps would really recommend getting the SA done. It was so reassuring for us to know DH has good fertility.

It’s so difficult @October1979 to know how to play it. I’d maybe have given ivf a go if I’d got to a year ttc. The statistics are poor but your individual chance may be really good. You’ve been pregnant before so maybe it would be better.

If you don’t feel stressed maybe its a one off thing. Maybe you’ll get it tomorrow. Really hope you catch this cycle! Xx

Hey @October1979 has your DH been for basic investigations? If there's a sperm issue you have no time to waste, get cracking with ICSI.

*peak

Hey @October1979 it could be stress related. How are you feeling in yourself. I used to find the more I obsessed about my cycle the later I ovulated. I do have an irregular cycle through. I hope you get a park soon! Xx

Well done @VWGolfmk2 definitely good to make sure all ok. Every pregnancy is different so there is no way of knowing without a scan if all ok as sometimes with no symptoms it can be bad news. Sometimes with bleeding and cramps it’s a healthy baby 🤷🏻‍♀️. It will definitely stop you worrying and wondering. I’d also ask a midwife about aspirin. I was told to take low dose aspirin every day to prevent preeclampsia. Also some evidence it helps prevent miscarriage. Clear it with midwife or doctor first though. Obviously prenatal with folic acid too. Try not to worry too much. There’s not much you can do that’ll affect the outcome. It’s hugely decided at the moment of conception. Just try and keep stress to a minimum and stay positive. I’m so happy for you. Within 6 months of trying too. Just shows how quickly it can happen post 40. The stats are misleading. Xx

@Catconfusion so sorry about your losses and the circumstances too, that's horrific. I totally agree that if something is wrong or going to go wrong, I'd rather know sooner rather than later. I've never been pregnant before and haven't really done much research so there's so much I don't know and I'm a natural worrier.

I decided to be a big girl today and phoned the Dr, so I'm booked in for my video appointment in January and scan in February looked up private scans locally so have booked a reassurance early scan one when I will be just over seven weeks at the start of January, as you're right, I won't be able to settle or wait until feb without some sort of reassurance. Plus due to circumstances we might need to tell my dad earlier than the usual 12 weeks and swear him to secrecy so I'd feel better having had the 7 week scan and knowing things were currently ok before telling him.

Hey @VWGolfmk2 I got an early scan through my doctor because I lost my first two pregnancies. In my first I got to 10 weeks before having a scan. The baby had stopped at 6 weeks. I had awful sickness throughout which is usually a good sign so it was baffling that I’d lost the baby. We only had a scan due to light spotting. The midwife wasn’t even worried so it was a shock. I think all women should have the option of an early scan just to make sure all is ok. It was horrible knowing I’d spent the last month getting excited about a baby I’d already lost. I don’t want to scare you as fingers crossed all ok for you but it’s worth making sure there is a heartbeat at the 6/7 week mark. Also that the baby has implanted in the right place. I’m not sure your GP will offer a scan purely on age but it’s worth asking. If not I’d pay for one. Two months is a long time to wait to know all is ok. If in the unlikely event of things not being ok you’re better to know early. We were one week off our 12 week scan having had no issues so it was devastating.

Anyway take each day as it comes and stay positive. You’re chances are really good. I’ve got everything crossed this is it for you! Xx

@Catconfusion oh that's interesting about the early scan, did you ask your doctor for that or was it a private one? That might be a good idea to both reassure me and also make it real. Will have a think about that option too.

Love the support and advice on this thread. It's been pretty lonely feeling like you can't really discuss ttc at this age with people because of nasty judgemental and frankly ridiculous attitudes so it's so refreshing that there's a wee group of us all in the same boat looking out for each other.

Thanks @October1979 I hope so. I’m aware I’m 18 months older now but hoping not much has changed! Good luck with the peak! Xx

Aww @VWGolfmk2 it’s such amazing news. Just take each day as it comes and seek medical advice if you have any concerns. I had an early scan at 6/7 weeks with ds just to check all ok. This might be a good idea. 12 weeks is such a long time to wait. Your great gran is proof it’s normal and natural to have babies later in life! Xx

@Nsky plenty of women have babies in their 40s these days. I married my husband at 39 so we’ve done it as early as we can.

Thank you @October1979 and @Bouncytree. It felt so surreal today, have been sitting in work every so often thinking 'oh! I'm pregnant' 😂. Did another test today just in case haha. Think it's going to take some time to sink in but just taking it a step at a time and not getting to far ahead of myself.

Hoping others on this thread get good news too soon.

Just remembered that my great grandmother was 47 when she gave birth to her only child, my grandpa, in the 1920s, only now fully appreciating how unusual and inspiring that is.

Thanks @October1979 we were going to wait a bit longer but I figure at 41 it’s worth going for it sooner rather than later. I’m just hoping the mcs last year were just bad luck and having DS is a good sign.

Just popping in to say it’s so nice to see bfps on here. I’m going to be in my fertile week just after Christmas and I’ve decided to start trying then. I’m anxious yet excited. Fingers crossed for us all! Xx

@VWGolfmk2 now that is a nice strong line! Congratulations. It is mind blowing and takes a while to sink in. It’s very abstract...you don’t really feel all that different and sometimes you feel like...maybe it’s not real! And it’s An instant but complete life change facing you. And you have no control!

So yes take some time to let it sink in. It can be wonderful and terrifying at the same time.But after a while you can start to relax into it.

So very happy for you!