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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40

960 replies

October1979 · 13/10/2020 16:07

I am 40 nearly 41 and ttc baby no1. I fell pregnant for the first time in December but suffered a missed miscarriage at 8 1/2 weeks in February. I've been trying ever since with no luck. I use Clearblue advanced fertility monitor. Take vitamin B, C and Co Q10 as well as pre conception tablets daily. Until lockdown I did weekly acupuncture. I guess I'm feeling low as af turned up today and I turn 41 very soon.

I am usually positive and hopeful. Trying to think what's for me won't go past me...

Looking for some buddies in the same boat or some over 40s who conceived naturally to give me hope and share their secret to success.

OP posts:
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Marvellouslymadmum · 17/04/2021 22:21

@Honey2 I literally fell pregnant with my two children that are now teens straight away, no issues at all but this has been a whole other ball game now at 42. I still don't know if it's him, me or both but it's certainly not happening for us!

Honey2 · 17/04/2021 21:38

@Littlemiss40andfabulous @Marvellouslymadmum

Thanks for replying, it’s so difficult not to be impatient! I’ve always fallen pregnant very quickly with my other children - and my 3rd was conceived after 2 miscarriages but still feel the first month after my period returned. I think it’s just getting my head around the reality of TTC at 40!

Marvellouslymadmum · 17/04/2021 10:11

@Honey2 hi and welcome, sorry to hear about your mc, it can take quite some time for your cycles to return to normal afterwards as your hormones are all over the place, I'm on a ttc after mc thread and though mine have returned pretty quick each time I know some who have taken months. As @Littlemiss40andfabulous said though you can be more fertile just after so I'd just dtd when you can and wait to see what happens, your cycles will regulate and temps get to where they need to when your body decides xx

Littlemiss40andfabulous · 17/04/2021 06:28

Hi @Honey2

Sorry to hear about your miscarriage. Apparently you are more fertile in the months after a miscarriage. I don't measure my temperature etc so can't really advise about that, but hope it doesn't take you too long to conceive again.

Littlemiss40andfabulous · 17/04/2021 06:24

@SeeSawSeen and @BabyMoonPie congratulations on your BFPs! Smile

Honey2 · 16/04/2021 22:14

Hi all,

I hope you don’t mind me joining this thread... I am also TTC at 40 (41 next month)

I have 3 kids already, conceived at 29, 33 and 35. This is a much hoped for final baby to complete our family.

After 3 months of trying we managed to concieve naturally but I sadly MC last month at 7weeks. I stopped bleeding about 3 weeks ago but I don’t think I’ve ovulated yet... had all the signs about 2 weeks after MC (fertile cm, high cervix, high opk) but never got the temp shift, now my temp has gone down again... I’m guess my body tried to ovulate but didn’t?? Now I don’t know what to expect, my period? or will my body try again to ovulate??

Really keeping my fingers crossed for you all xx

Marvellouslymadmum · 16/04/2021 20:33

@sabtom it's definitely going to be a confused one!

sabtom · 16/04/2021 20:18

@Marvellouslymadmum I would agree, however, that meant I've ovulated 3 days after the peak and 4 days later than Ava predicted? This is gunna be a funny cycle I think 😤

Marvellouslymadmum · 16/04/2021 19:57

@sabtom hmm that's a tough one as it's still lower the fp but if it goes up next few days that should mean it was cd18 I'd guess

@SeeSawSeen aww congratulations, that's great to hear! I hope your pregnancy goes well, gives us all hope 😊

sabtom · 16/04/2021 17:22

@SeeSawSeen congratulations! Thank you for sharing, I wish you a happy healthy pregnancy Thanks and yes, I don't believe just cause we're 40+ we are out 😊

SeeSawSeen · 16/04/2021 17:04

Hi everyone,

I haven't posted before, but I have lurked vigorously!

41, overweight, TTC #1 for 7 months....and just got my BFP last week.

I'm not saying this to brag, I promise. I just wanted to put it out there that it can happen, and we are not automatically counted out due to having the nerve to be over 40!

And because I love reading everyone's symptoms, here goes:

  • DTD 3 days before ovulation, so I was convinced I was out this month!
  • so cold during my TWW, literally shivering the whole time.
  • had a runny nose on and off
  • crazy period pains (or so I thought, but I guess this was implantation - no bleeding)
  • sore boobs, but no more so than usual pre-AF.
  • couldn't wake up a few mornings, but am very much not a morning person anyway!

And that's it...I genuinely though this month was a write-off due to lack of DTD. Just goes to show that we never really know.

Good luck to you all x

sabtom · 16/04/2021 16:53

@BabyMoonPie welcome and thank you for giving us hope 😊

@Marvellouslymadmum I might go back to using my thermometer next cycle as I'm gunna have to start setting my alarm again next week for work 😤 It'll be interesting to see Ava's results alongside it.

Temp is still going up, but still not sure when/if I ovulated this cycle or when AF is due 🤷🏻‍♀️

Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40
Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40
Marvellouslymadmum · 15/04/2021 10:46

@sabtom I have an Apple Watch that does the rhr and sleep pattern so it probably wouldn't be worth it to me, I'm guessing I'm better of with my bbt thermometer and I'm used to waking up to use it now anyway 🤷🏼‍♀️

@BabyMoonPie that's great to hear thank you! I have a fertilily and have been using it, trying everything posssible here!

BabyMoonPie · 15/04/2021 10:01

Morning lovely ladies. I thought I would share my story to give you hope. DH and I have DD who is 4 and who took 8 months to conceive. In January 2019 we started trying for number 2. Nothing happened so we got tested by the NHS and nothing adverse showed up. We're not eligible for anymore NHS help as we have DD so we kept trying. This year we decided to pursue private fertility treatment to try and get answers so we could know why it wasn't happening. Last week I had a scan which showed things were OK and the Consultant said I should be able to get pregnant and just needed to release a golden egg. This week I very unexpectedly got my BFP. Cycle number 27 and I'm 41 in a few weeks. I don't know if it made a difference or was coincidence but the only thing we did differently this cycle was use a fertilily (thing like a menstrual cup that you insert after sex and it keeps sperm at your cervix). It's been a tough old journey and we've a way to go yet but don't give up if you're not ready to and I wish you all success

sabtom · 15/04/2021 09:33

@Marvellouslymadmum the Ava is definitely easier, as long as I get at least 4 hours of sleep it still measures the average temp throughout the night so I didn't have to worry about getting up at the exact time everyday or nipping to the loo in the middle of the night lol it's also interesting to know resting heart rate and sleep patterns etc. Whether it's more reliable than oral temperature, I have no idea.

Marvellouslymadmum · 15/04/2021 08:54

@sabtom aah now it makes sense! 😂 I was thinking I was going mad lol so do you find as the Ava takes skin temp rather than oral is it as reliable to see a pattern on the chart? It's definitely easier!

sabtom · 15/04/2021 01:23

@Marvellouslymadmum ah yes, sorry to confuse you, I put my Ava temps into FF which is my skin temp. I haven't recorded my oral temps in an app because I've only been taking them for a few days. I didn't intend to use oral temps anymore because it was annoying having to get up at the same time every morning, so that's why I got the Ava. But I thought the Ava was malfunctioning this month so I just took a few oral temps to check. And because Ava takes the skin temp, the temperatures are considerably lower than oral temps.

Hope that made sense? Lol

Marvellouslymadmum · 15/04/2021 00:58

@sabtom am I reading your chart wrong? It looks like the last temp is 34.70 on the ff chart last pic?

sabtom · 14/04/2021 21:22

@Trixie78 yeah, I'm on folic acid too and have been for over 2 years, and because I'm diabetic I'm on the prescription 5mg stuff! 💪🏻 lol But folic acid is just one of the manyyyyyyy supplements I'm taking lol the amount of money I've spent on vitamins, supplements, reflexology, acupuncture etc, could've paid for a round of IVF! 😤

Update: temp still went up today both on Ava and oral temp (36.83) and now the Ava is showing a confirmed ovulation for CD14 (nothing yet on FF) although my temp is lower than it was during AF which is weird, and I didn't even get a peak OPK til CD15 🤷🏻‍♀️

Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40
Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40
Trying to conceive baby No 1 over 40
Marvellouslymadmum · 14/04/2021 11:01

@Trixie78 folic acid is one of the supplements I'm taking, I have been tested for some things by the gp Which all came back ok and been referred for more tests but the waiting list is 8 months, I'm speaking to the doc Friday to see if there's anything she can do to help and if not I'll be booking them in privately, thank you it's lovely to hear the positive stories x

Trixie78 · 13/04/2021 22:54

Take folic acid daily. I had my first at 41 but was via IVF. If I were you I'd get tested now. Few places will take you on if you're going to potentially be pregnant over 45 so if there is a problem you need to know now. Like you I tried natural for 3 years, I got tested at 40 and was told my chances of conceiving naturally were practically 0 ( even though I'd had a previous pregnancy and MMC at 9 weeks). Good luck x

Marvellouslymadmum · 13/04/2021 22:52

@sabtom I would think they'll re do some bloods as it's been that long now and worth a shot for referal! Ivf is crazy prices and as I'm 42 I know I have less chance of it working so hoping for a miracle here lol

sabtom · 13/04/2021 22:40

@Marvellouslymadmum maybe my gp can refer me back to the consultants at Guys, or at least do all the base line blood tests again seen as it's been a couple of years? It just feels like there's gotta be something else to try before we throw £14K on IVF (yes, that's what Create quoted us for 3 cycles of modified IVF 😭)

Marvellouslymadmum · 13/04/2021 20:47

@sabtom ahh that's good about the temperature, as far as I am aware it's very very rare for a go to prescribe clomid or letrazole as they're normally something only a gynaecologist will prescribe. My temps are low in the Lp as well and I'm spreading to my doc on Friday as she's referred me to the gynaecologist but it's an 8 month wait as they've put me down as routine and I'm hoping to get some other tests and be bumped up to investigations

sabtom · 13/04/2021 18:51

Hi ladies! So my temp went up a little this morning with the Ava bracelet and I took another oral temp just to check (36.78) so maybe it's rising slowly. Also had my first fertility acupuncture session today - Not as relaxing as reflexology lol but I'm willing to give anything a go lol

The acupuncturist did recommend I push my GP to try Clomid and letrozole first before forking out a lot of money for IVF, because she seems to think my follicle count and AMH is not bad, however my low temps in the LP might mean I'm not ovulating all the time.

But if I've had all the tests (about 1.5/2 yrs ago) will my doctor be willing to do them all again? I did bring up my suspicion of low progesterone when I did IUI a few months ago, but it just got brush off and I was assured if my cycles are regular then I'm ovulating. Also, it was never mentioned to try clomid or letrozole and I was advised to go straight to IVF.
Hmm what to do? 🤔