TTC #1, cycle 13 and fed up! Whose with me?

@notyetamumbuttrying we're prepared to pay once we've had our NHS round. We would prefer our NHS round first, so we don't completely drain our savings on the first go...

@Rosie189 it would be worth checking, as your GP may not know / may interpret the policy for themselves. I'm not sure how it works in Scotland. There's a website that you can use to search fertility rights. I'll check if it so covers Scotland...

@notyetamumbuttrying he’s happy with the plan. To be fair I think he’d be happy to go for ivf straight away where as I’m open to waiting a little longer. He opened up a little bit about how much he wants this too. I think he’s definitely feeling a bit stressed about it all.
@CurbsideProphet they will start investigations but don’t think you can start any fertility treatment before 2 years (I may be wrong) at least that’s what my gp has said to me.

@Juno231 we’re actually fairly lucky and have a semi decent amount of savings already. Had hoped to use for new car and an extension or for making a change in work/maternity leave easier but all those things were mainly for life when we had kids so might as well put it towards hopefully actually having them.

@CurbsideProphet ah yes, remember now. What a pain for you! Is private an option for you? X

@notyetamumbuttrying yes we're on the list. Our CCG refers to Care Fertility who run the fertility service at the Countess of Chester hospital (35+ miles away 😬). The Countess of Chester have capped NHS patient numbers to only 15 per month. Unsure when we're starting. Possibly in a few months. Care Fertility asked me to contact PALS so we're waiting to hear the results of negotiations...

@Rosie189 are you with barclays at all? their personal loans tend to be quite good - I sometimes think that's the route we'd take if we need private ivf. Interest rates are decent and you can then spread the cost over 3 years or whatever instead of killing yourself trying to come up with all the savings up front. Just a thought!

@Rosie189 what did Dh say? Hope you've come to a decision on it all now x
@CurbsideProphet we've still not watched the docu. I did say to Dh but he said no at the time. Will suggest it again tonight and see what he says! Might suggest he watches it without me, but I'm always here 😂
Yeah the wait times are so bad at the moment! Are you actually on the waiting list for ivf yet?
@Theawkwardblonde hope you're well lovely ☺️

@notyetamumbuttrying the wait times are awful aren't they 😬 I was 35 before Christmas and really feeling the worry. My AMH is low as it is 😬

@Rosie189 what a nightmare for you. I didn't realise things are so different in Scotland. We needed 1 year of ttc, not 2.

@thislittlebird my fibroid is a bit of an issue in that it is close to my left ovary, but it's nowhere near the endometrium which would would have been a concern. It's definitely medium sized, not small.
DH has recorded the Rhod Gilbert documentary. He wants to watch it on his own. I'll encourage him to watch it soon if you thought it was good.

@notyetamumbuttrying thanks. Im going to speak to DH properly today. I think we might go private for initial investigations. Then wait and see how things go over the next 6 months (and save like crazy) if we’re still not pregnant then that will be us at the 2 year mark if it’s not looking promising with nhs we might bite the bullet and go private. If I’ve had no update from nhs in another 3-4 months will contact gp and see if they’ll refer straight to fertility, fairly sure they won’t do it till near the 2 year make anyway.

I think we could afford private it but it would really effect DH giving up offshore so unless this working from home thing can become long term I’m not sure how we will deal with that but one problem at a time. I’m in Scotland. Rules look to be that we could still get nhs treatment if private unsuccessful but have to use all frozen embryos privately first.

@Rosie189 sorry honey! We're going private for my antral follicle scan and will prob go private for ivf too. We still get our nhs round funded if we have no more than 2 private rounds. So that's our plan now. Hopefully our nhs appointment on the 22nd goes ahead and I can give the private clinic my amh results and Dh gets his repeat SA. Then once I have the scan with the clinic we get our consultation and get going once they come up with a plan! Appointments are booked for early March. So if you can afford it I'd defo look at private. Nhs wait times are through the roof! I was told 3-6 months just for the funding approval and a further 6-9 months to actually start! I'm 35 next month, I just can't bear to wait that long...

Had a letter through this morning with update re waiting times from my referral to gynae. Looks like services have been closed in my area. Only just re opening and months before they’ll be back at full capacity. No indication of how long it will take for an initial appointment. Feeling a bit flat. Think we may look into going private at least for a scan. It’s just so frustrating.

Do they think the fibroid will be a problem for you @CurbsideProphet? I had one too but she said it was small and not in the way of anything.

Yeah, my friends were all the same. It hurts tbh. Hard to deal with. My friend seems to get it more (instead of telling me to relax) now I’ve told her DH has some mixed results he needs to work on. But still, I don’t have any friends who have been in this tedious, depressing boat.

BBC did a news feature last night on this convenient street full of pregnant women in Bristol that nearly pushed me over the edge . Decided to watch Rhod Gilbert’s documentary to balance things out (it was really good, would recommend).

@thislittlebird no I don't think people do understand what this is like. My sister, friends, and DH's friends and sibling all decided to have babies and were pregnant a few months later. Some even had unintentional pregnancies. We can't really speak to them about it as they have no idea what we're going through.

@thislittlebird I had a scan on the NHS in early Sept that diagnosed my fibroid, a private scan in November which measured the fibroid properly. She did look at my ovaries but I can't remember how many follicles there were. I'll apparently have another scan when I'm on the list to start IVF.

Have you had/are you waiting for a scan of your follicles too? It is very daunting yeah, but it’s good that you know so you didn’t wait years and years longer. I don’t think people realise how stressful it all is. Signing yourself off is probably a good plan.

@thislittlebird AMH was 6.8 so every period is very stressful as I keep thinking "that's another egg gone" 😬 I've signed myself off work while I wait for this to be resolved which is helping. I listen to people's problems on the phone and I don't have the energy for that right now!

@CurbsideProphet The cap feels really unfair. I don’t know how ours works in terms of caps but I know they’ll want me to be trying until September 2021 at least and that doesn’t fill me with confidence because I’m not getting any younger . I think the plan to start in three months privately and save in the meantime if no BFP is the best option we have. DH can take his supplements in that time and get a couple more SAs.

Yeah the wait is tough, especially with anything working against you. What was your AMH?

@thislittlebird I went to Liverpool for the private appointment and I'm going to Chester on the NHS. Care at Chester have been capped on monthly NHS numbers by the Countess of Chester hospital where they are based. They asked me to complain to PALS so I'm waiting to hear the result... Otherwise we're looking at starting in May. I'm 35 with low AMH and DH has slightly low sperm due to childhood surgery on a cyst. The wait really isn't ideal.

Where is your nearest Care @CurbsideProphet? I went to the London one for my tests and then had a call with a consultant there this week. They have been good so far. I remember seeing my local trust uses them (amongst a couple of others I think) and it’s good that you’ll be able to see them for one nhs round. I would go that route too but I think I’m older than you and I don’t really want to wait as long as the nhs would like so we’re saving as much as we can. Lockdown is helping in that regard, less expenditure on travel etc.

On the plus side they’ve just launched these packages which are still expensive I’m sure, but you might get 50% back or something if not successful.

@thislittlebird we had 2 private appointments with Professor Kingsland from Care Fertility as we were actually waiting to see him on the NHS (until recently he was covering our nearest NHS fertility service). We're going to Care Fertility for IVF as our CCG refers to them - no NHS clinics where we live. I dread to look at the private costs, as I fully expect that we'll need to pay to try again after our NHS round 😬

The one thing to be said about the Zita West supplements is that you can 100% guarantee the ingredients, that's why they were recommended to us. But yes the cost 😬

Oh I see, well if ubiquinol is a hefty pill we can both complain together I guess . I already complain about the size of the Omega 369 I’m taking lol. Yeah makes sense if it’s already in the proxeed anyway.

They’re so expensive @CurbsideProphet and I can only imagine ZW ones are pricier still.

Speaking of Zita West I saw CARE have some live q and a stream with her on Thursday, I noticed when I checked their insta earlier about those packages they’re offering.

We're both taking Zita West ubiquinol on advice of the fertility clinic. We're also taking Zita West vitamin and antioxidant, Vitamin D spray, and I'm taking DHEA. Trying not to think how long we'll have to keep paying out for these 😬

@thislittlebird sorry I wasn't clear. He's fine with the proxceed. It's the ubiquinol that he stopped taking, size of them I think put him off. Plus I do think proxceed has it in anyway, just less than 100mg.
Ooh thanks for the post link, will have a read of that in a sec.