TTC #1, cycle 13 and fed up! Whose with me?

@Theawkwardblonde oOOo do you think it could be implantation bleeding?

UPDATE: got my bloods done today! I didn't know they where going to take 6 tubes worth (apparently they all have to go to different departments). I'm just glad to get it done as it got painful at some point. The GP will call me this Thursday to discuss results. Thanks to all who encouraged me to get my blood tested as I was going to wait until next year spring 💗💖

@Theawkwardblonde sorry I've not replied in a while. How are you doing today? So sorry to read how you've been feeling. It truly is the shittest thing to go through isn't it! We're here to help where we can, you're not alone through this x

Oh it's turning my flower emojis into a gin emoji ffs.

Sorry don't know how that gin emoji got in there 🤔

@Theawkwardblonde your feelings are understandable but as @SR12 said it's common that women are more invested in TTC than men. We are more maternal than they're and sometimes they need a wake up call for them to get invested.

With my DH he only got invested this August after a whole year of trying. Previously it was common for us to argue around the fertile window as he'd be chilled as he didn't understand that we only get 1 chance each month, he really did think we could just have sex anytime and it would happen.

In August a close member of his family announced a pregnancy and it somehow changed him. He apologised for not taking TTC seriously and he now asks me when my fertile window is and he takes his vitamins every morning before work without me reminding (nagging) him like I used to. Seriously it's like a miracle!

In your situation I would take time out and maybe carry on in January 2021, a new year always puts everyone in a motivated mood

@Theawkwardblonde Sorry you’re feeling so fed up. Hugs!

@Theawkwardblonde 💐💐

@Theawkwardblonde don't think you are alone in how you feel or also with your OH. I have just turned 38 and my OH still doesn't get my need to crack on. Men really just don't feel it or get it like us. However now we have seen a fertility consultant and they have suggested IVF and he has seen the price he suddenly seems a lot more willing to cut back on drink etc etc wink
My doctors got all my bloods wrong and it was the final straw for me and we did end up going private as like you I just felt to stressed and down by it all. I like to be in control and just felt I had none so I decided it was worth it and it wasn't a horrific cost to be honest. Just for initial investigations. It really does get very stressful ttc a couple of months ago I had a big blow up with my OH as like you say about yours mine was just quite unsupportive and uninterested but we had a really good chat in the end and I explained what I needed and wanted and we got back on track. I honestly wouldn't give up hope maybe just take a break for a little while if you feel you need it mentally. I hate the whole 'it only takes once' blah blah blah but it did happen to me (sadly I had a mc) when we weren't trying and had only had sex once that month and not even around ovulation so I do like to cling to that every now and then when it all gets a bit much! I hope you feel more positive soon x

@Theawkwardblonde I looked on the British Acupuncture Council website to find practitioners in my area, then picked a woman based on her background (pathology) and the fact that she's also registered with the "acupuncture fertility network" (it's called something like that anyway). I've found it a good outlet, mainly because she has seen many women in my position and it makes me feel less alone with it all (if that makes sense). It also helps my migraines and anxiety, so I'm finding it worth the money for that alone. I'm not going out for lunch or buying clothes etc, so the cost balances out for me in that respect. I can also claim some of the costs back through Simply Health.

Anxiety is an absolute prick isn't it 😔 I think of it as my joy thief. I spent a fortune on EMDR (NHS wait time was 2 years here and I physically couldn't wait). I was in a good place before ttc, but I've felt my inner resolve continue to crumble. I'm just going day at a time now, as I find it too upsetting to look too far ahead. It's like the Sliding Doors film in many ways, all the possibilities of how the past year could have gone. If my pregnancy at new year had been successful I would have had my baby by now. So I'm really just trying to focus on where I am today. Doing my best anyway!

@Theawkwardblonde 😔 what an unnecessary complication 😔 My mental health has improved since I started acupuncture a few weeks ago, mainly because it feels like I'm doing something productive. Is that an option for you?

@Theawkwardblonde that’s super frustrating! Sorry it’s happened!

@Theawkwardblonde oh wow that's a very annoying setback! Really sorry about that. I hadn't even imagined that mix-up happening. I hate needles so I'd be furious if I had to do it again. Do you live in a busy town ? What do you think could have happened? Did the label fall off? They didn't store the blood sample properly ? 😯

As I ovulated on CD14 this month I called to change my bloods from 19th to 20th October which will be cycle day 21.

I'm currently 3dpo and only have 1 HCG strip test left from last cycle which is not very sensitive, so I have to wait until at least12dpo if I'm hoping for a squinter. Something always overcomes me when I get to 10dpo, my patience runs wild and I start testing everyday from 10dpo. I'm not planning to buy any replacement strip tests until 14dpo (I say that every cycle though )

I'm due AF in 6 days and am convinced it will be negative. Obviously I've been consulting Dr Google while I wait for my phone appointment with the specialist. I'm hoping he will prescribe Clomid to make sure that I'm definitely ovulating.

I definitely resign myself to it being negative but at the same time still put myself through looking for any little symptom and still double check my test as if wishing it will suddenly magically make it positive! This month I had especially said to myself not to feel any hope as we only managed once within ovulation but because I had pain a week or so after ovulation I think I was trying to get my hopes up it could be implantation! I am due AF on the 20th and have any symptoms so pretty sure I am out, again, for another month.

@dogmam that made me chuckle as well! We went private with my OH for that part as we were having to wait so long for even the test and then they said 2 weeks for results. I was starting to stress so much about it (my business has massively reduced over corona so have far to much time on my hands which I am not used to!) and because of my age I decided I just wanted to know if we were wasting out time and stressing ourselves out trying. I am now trying to get a scan done via NHS but even trying to get a phone consultation for my bloods is a nightmare!

@HbSapphy totally know that feeling. Fingers crossed for you.

@BeachPeach my OH has had his bloods done, they look for stuff like hormones abnormalities

Oh its all such a minefield isn't it! It took my body quite a while to get back to normal after my miscarriage but I know a lot of people conceived really quickly after.

I am currently in the waiting for AF wishing and imaging pregnancy symptoms! I have 30 day cycles so always feels like such a wait after ovulation. We only managed one try this month as OH had to do his sperm analysis which fell at the wrong time so I know my chances are incredibly slim but you can't help have that hope. This month 7/8 days after ov I've had cramps and tingling in my lower left stomach so of course have been googling it all but now I have lower left back pain instead!! I daren't do an early test as just hate having hope dashed!

For anyone thinking of going privately honestly I would recommend it. The wait just really got to me - especially as I feel on borrowed time - and I just felt like I wanted to know to be able to then move forward a bit and plan.

Hi, not posted in a couple days as I've just been waiting for the results of 21 day bloods (seems like we are all at very similar stages which is nice.. shit situation, but nice we are in it together 🙃) anyway, got the bloods on Friday and not heard anything back so just rang them and spoke to a receptionist who read 'high chance of ovulation', I asked what the number was and it was 56.8, apparently anything over 30 suggests ovulation has occurred. So that's one thing ticked off the list.
My other halfs SA appointment letter (and pot LOL) arrived in the post today. Appointment is for the 28th, but really it's just when he has to drop the 'sample' and schedule the wank! So the rules on the letter are, it needs to be dropped off within an hour, it needs to be kept close to the body under clothing during transportation, sex should be absthained from 3-5 days prior to test date (bang goes the plan of doing SMEP next month 🙃) and finally in capital letters THE USE OF A PUBLIC TOILET TO COLLECT YOUR SAMPLE IS AGAINST THE LAW.. I admit I'm so immature about the whole SA thing so this made me smile.

So current situation is waiting for the 28th and the results then u guess depending on what they are going back to the GP? But either way, if they're good or bad results we still aren't getting pregnant so what next?! I haven't been offered day 3 bloods so not sure if I should ask for them or not.

In other news.. CD10 today and just started spotting. Fan-fecking-tastic. Thought I was gonna be one of those people who struggle for a year then just get the ball rolling with investigations but by some miracle manage to fall.. But no.

Hope you are all ok 😁

Hi all. I'm totally late to this party but Can I please hop in anyway!!
We've been ttc #1 for 11 months and had a Mmc in sept. I'm Pretty emotional at the moment as I have tingly tummy and my cervix has all but disappeared and so Google will tell me I'm likely pregnant but the tests are saying no. I'm not usually hormonal when AF arrives so what's going on!

Waiting for AF to arrive but no signs of that. Now about 5+3 weeks after Mmc and we've been trying steadily all month and I don't know whether to test every time I pee or get the tampons out and down a huge glass of wine.

Hi @SR12 and welcome! Sorry you’ve had an unhelpful experience with your GP too.

@Theawkwardblonde I’m not sure really, going to ring them today and ask what’s next as I’m sure if I don’t then nothing will happen. OH is having his bloods next week but lord knows what they’re looking for? Anyone else’s OH had bloods?

@CurbsideProphet thanks for sharing your experience of going privately, I’m increasingly thinking it might be the way forward if I actually want things to progress, GPs not filling me with confidence.

I’m so glad I’ve found this thread to see I’m not alone in my frustration and confusion, thanks guys ☺️