TTC #1, cycle 13 and fed up! Whose with me?

@Rosie189 thank you!

@Theawkwardblonde thank you trying to stay positive ! ☺️

Thanks all.

@Theawkwardblonde how frustrating about the extra costs!

@CurbsideProphet 🤞 you get to start soon.

@notyetamumbuttrying I do have family fairly close by. Not seeing them much at the moment due to covid though. DH back at the end of the week. The last week he’s away is always the toughest. It’s a lot easier to be positive when he’s here. Hoping he can find something different soon and be home. Ovulated yesterday and the frustration of a wasted cycle doesn’t help the negative feelings.

@lucyrp thanks and congratulations again!

@Theawkwardblonde an extra £900 out of nowhere 😯 that's awful. Can you get anywhere with the NHS?

@notyetamumbuttrying I'm back to acupuncture on Saturday after a few weeks off. I think that will help me. I was doing ok until the news of DH's pregnant sibling. The sadness just swelled up again like a tsunami.

@Theawkwardblonde what do you do again? Wow wee how shit of the clinic! Sorry hun 😞

@notyetamumbuttrying I did indeed, thanks again🥰🥰

@Theawkwardblonde this was the 16th month of ttc 🤯 it was draining but so worth it in the end. Let's hope it's a sticky one 🥰

@CurbsideProphet good! Thanks for asking, just the usual for me lol! How are you? Just read more of your posts, perhaps you should consider counselling now? Not sleeping can't be helping your mental health x
@lucyrp forgot you snuck over here too Lucy Lou, congrats again my lovely ☺️
@Rosie189 I feel your pain, me too with the little cries! You're not crap for not getting pregnant though, you need to change your way of thinking. Try some mindfulness exercises. There's podcasts on them, that might help. And tell ppl that's such a personal question to ask so that they feel embarrassed and don't ask again! Feel for you with DH being away a lot, do you have family nearby?x

@Rosie189 I have my skype appointment with the Consultant just after new year and I'm expecting to start either end of January or mid February, depending on how busy they are. I'm hoping the consultant will be able to say for definite which cycle, as when admin booked the appointment they implied that I could ring on the 2nd day of my cycle in January and be told they're too busy. I just need to know for my mental health.
How lonely for you to have your DH working away through this. I described it to my DH as a daily mental marathon. I feel like a horrible person but I'm crippled with jealousy this week that DH's sibling is pregnant after ttc for hardly any time in comparison to us. Probably 2 months.

@Rosie189 nope don't give up hope ! Trust in the process 🥰

Work is a mix for me. My job is pretty high pressure but it’s a distraction. However one close work friend is pregnant and I’m dreading her going off for multiple reasons. I dread my other close work friend announcing she’s pregnant for the sadness of having to deal with it and the idea of being left at work by myself dealing with all the madness alone and the fact that I’m crap and can’t get pregnant. Trying to be normal all day is tough. I’ve been getting constant “when are you having a baby chat” at work too.

I’m doomsdaying about it all a bit. Husband works away which doesn’t help. Been alone the last month. Desperate for him to try and change jobs but it’s scary for financial security etc too. The whole thing feels tough and I’m not dealing very well at all.

@CurbsideProphet i know you were told you need ivf are you on a waiting list for that?

@Rosie189 it's not really any consolation but I'm also struggling. I spend a lot of my working day on the phone and pretending to be normal takes up so much energy I don't have anything left. I'm very fortunate to be WFH as mentally I'm spent. I then spend the evening trying not to wobble and upset worried DH, then I lie awake until 2am 😔

@CurbsideProphet
I’m going for repeat day 21 bloods on Friday. Didn’t ovulate last time when I went for bloods and hubby has appointment booked for Jan. Not sure what will happen after my results. Guessing if I’ve not ovulated and hubby is ok will get clomid. Or referral. Mentally/emotionally I’m really struggling. Keep having random cries over silly little things. Feeling a bit defeated.

How are you getting on?

@lucyrp congrats. Shouldn’t give up hope yet then.

@CurbsideProphet thank you' I am really happy but actually probably more anxious. Hoping I have a sticky one 😬 yeah 16 months ttc is draining 😭😴

That's a lovely clear one there, congratulations @lucyrp 💐 you must be so pleased after over 12 months trying 💐

@CurbsideProphet I got my BFP on Friday last week 😁 I didn't want to bombard you all with it. But currently 17dpo

How are you @notyetamumbuttrying @lucyrp @Rosie189 💐
Apologies if I've missed anyone 💐

@BeachPeach I'm so sorry, what a terrible shock for you both. I hope he gets seen by oncology very quickly. Please don't apologise for feeling self pity - struggling to conceive is bad enough, but you've got this on top now.

@Theawkwardblonde have you been for your private appointment?

I have my phone appointment with a Consultant from the fertility clinic just after new year. I was managing my MH reasonably until I got the news that DH's younger sibling is pregnant. I feel like a horrible person but I physically can't manage to see them atm. Thank god for tier 3 restrictions.

@BeachPeach wow no wonder you're in shock hun, that's a lot to take in! Glad he's being referred ASAP! I hope all goes well. Sounds like you'll need to speak to someone irl as well as it's quite major news. So much luck and best wishes to you both xx

Hi all, wondering how everyone’s getting on as I feel like I need to hear from other people who get how shit this process is!
We had OH’s SA results back and the results have kind of knocked us for six. He’s producing no sperm at all. GP has referred him to oncology because based on his previous testicular cancer, that’s a likely culprit 😳. Slight silver lining is that the GP has tracked down his frozen sperm from 15 years ago so that’s a positive, but it’s quite low quality.
I’m kind of still in shock really and feeling totally numb about it, the news that we can’t conceive naturally was a big enough blow but the possibility of OH having cancer again is too much to even contemplate.
Hope everyone else is having a much better time and getting some positive news. Sorry for wallowing in self pity, but I’ve not told anyone in real life. Big love!

@Theawkwardblonde that is awful. 🤞 you get some answers and it all goes well.

@Theawkwardblonde that’s awful they won’t let you book another appointment. Definitely should ask for a repeat day 21 bloods. Especially if your cycle was unusual this time.

My day 21 showed no ovulation but I’ve to get them repeated once I have my next cycle (started today 😢). I had an abnormal bleed at time of day 21 bloods. I think I’ve had the other bloods last year for irregular periods. Although have been almost regular for past 9 months till I had to get investigations.

Waiting till I get my day 21’s done again then hoping I can get a referral. Especially as I’m now spotting for up to a week before my period turns up which doesn’t seem right. Also think I’ve had a 10day luteal phase which is too short too. 😫.

@CurbsideProphet thank you. Hubby works away and away for pretty much a month which doesn’t help as there isn’t even the well it’s a new cycle positivity.

@Theawkwardblonde ooh I'd be raging if they wouldn't let me book another phone apt! You need to discuss with a gp. Sounds to me that your bloods last week were your day 3's. Day 21s determine ovulation so if that was below 30 it's generally low and shows an issue. Demand another apt on the day 21 outcome.