Dr refusing fertility assistance as I'm still BF

I breastfed my DC's for over two and a half years each and even though my periods returned after 15 months I would say my periods didn't go back to normal until a couple of months after I stopped breastfeeding completely. The bleeding was different when I was breastfeeding even though the regularity of my periods was the same.

If you really want to fall pregnant I would stop breastfeeding if you are ready to or make peace with waiting until your DC has stopped.

1940s I am TTC and have unexplained secondary infertility. My gp was also not very supportive - perfectly nice, and gave me the blood tests, but said “this is probably a waste of time”. I’m now looking into seeing a private fertility doctor, but - in my area - it’s incredibly expensive so it’s a tough decision whether or not to keep (pointlessly) trying, or spend money and be proactive.

You have my sympathy!

I also bought “It Starts With The Egg” on kindle today. Might be worth a read? It’s a bit scaremongery, but people swear by it!

(Have also done the other easy fixes like supplements, using preseed and conceive plus etc, but didn’t work for me.)

[quote 1940s]@NailsNeedDoing I've been tracking my cycles, using OPKs and tracking temperatures every month. All signal that I'm ovulating. I've already researched and since I've been having monthly cycles for 20ish months all research from google indicates I am in fact ovulating. It's very rare for someone to have had so many monthly periods to not be ovulating at all.

I'm assuming anyone here accusing me of being self indulgent or should have done my research have never felt the pain and anguish of months of trying for a baby.

I'm breastfeeding my 26 month old currently as they have issues with their diet and me breastfeeding has been a source of nutrition that's been really important.

At no stage have I been rude or entitled. I simply sought advice from anyone who has had similar feedback.

If I came on here and said 'I'm using breastfeeding as a sole contraception despite having monthly cycles that are fairly regular for 20 months' then I'd be accused of being crazy. Many many women get pregnant despite breastfeeding[/quote]
Hey op, the first step is actually checking your DHs sperm count so a sympathetic go Def could have referred you now on the understanding that you would give up bf IF NECESSARY.
My GP referred me early because of my age and how long it takes so there are understanding ones out there. And yes that was with my second.

Can you get a 2nd opinion altho I THINK it's 2 years of trying officially before they'll refer you

I think your GP is right, you shouldn’t have fertility investigation when breastfeeding, you should stop and see how you go. Just like they tell fat people to lose weight. It’s all about helping yourself in the first instance. It’s awful you’re struggling but you have a child already, resources should be for primary infertility IMO.

But it’s no diff to an overweight person complaining of medical issues that could be exasperated my being overweight. You’ve been given advice, try it or don’t but the complaining because you had a google is odd to me. Just stop feeding and see what happens, touch wood that’s the only block.

Many of us have had that pain. And some of us before already having a baby. You're still being unreasonable and now I'm quite miffed with you as well.

I don't know if anyone's mentioned it but... pandemic.

You can get pregnant BFing, but as PPs have mentioned, your chances can be lower even when your periods have returned. Unfortunately although this is understandably important to you, to a GP it's very low priority at the moment.

Breastfeeding produces the hormone prolactin, this means that even though you may be having regular periods, it could be blocking ovulation. You are unlikely to conceive whilst still breastfeeding due to this, even if only once a day as your prolactin levels will be high.

[quote 1940s]@NailsNeedDoing is this from personal experience or you just reasoning that I shouldn't expect a consultative approach from speaking to my NHS GP? [/quote]
I’d expect most of us have experienced the NHS doing enough, but not everything that they could possibly do. It’s well know that GPs have a ridiculously short amount of time in a standard appointment.

It’s like an obese person going to the doctor to complain about snoring. Clearly the most obvious solution is going to be suggested before finding out if anything else needs to be done to rectify the problem. People can and should be expected to help themselves first before going to a GP. Especially when part of what they want could be achieved by the patient doing some of their own research.

Seriously op you are very entitled and deluded. If you want to see if you struggle to conceive naturally, stop breastfeeding. Some women can conceive whilst bf some can’t. If you want additional tests and conversations re: fertility, pay for them.

Jeez - how totally self indulgent.

If you want a full work up on why you’re not getting pregnant despite continuing to do something that has been known for millennia to suppress fertility then I’m sure someone in the private sector will take your money.

If you are serious about getting pregnant then stop breastfeeding and see how you get on. Otherwise go private or google is your friend.

And this is spoken as someone who breastfed both times past one year and got pregnant two months after I stopped breastfeeding after trying for six months previously.

[quote 1940s]@beestrees I do appreciate that perspective and realise that certainly I'm in a super fortunate healthy position.

I think my frustration is that the Dr seemed so dismissive and that ultimately finishing breastfeeding isn't something I wanted to do as a step one. I would have appreciated an in depth conversation about my cycle, my history and how infertility assistance may even be processed as I already have a child. Making the first call to the Dr after waiting over a year was a pretty tough thing to do and she didn't explain why I may be lower priority or what else may come if finishing breastfeeding doesn't result in a pregnancy.

[/quote]
In the kindest way, the pandemic is a clear reason you might be lower priority for a GP referral right now when the backlog of potentially life threatening things is still enormous.

I got pregnant while breastfeeding so your GP is wrong in saying that’s the reason. It could well be affecting things though as every woman is different. As you already have a child then I think the most a GP will do is order some blood tests to see if you’ve ovulated, check thyroid etc. if you want something more detailed you’ll have to contact a fertility clinic privately

I think to be honest at this time given the circumstances the OP is very low on the priority list with GPs hence why she has had the response she has had given that she already has a young child (and wouldn't get IVF) and continues to breastfeed which is a well known inhibitor to falling pregnant again. It's impossible to get a face to face doctor appointment at the moment even for serious illness

Even private IVF clinics where you are paying for a service are likely to have the same advice - stop breastfeeding and then come back if there is no change since no clinic will offer treatment whilst breastfeeding anyway

@1940s are you from the UK? Have you had much experience with GPs in UK? Just that the type of discussion you anticipated doesn't sound realistic. I am sure there are lots of great GPs out there who would take this kind of time and care. But most won't/can't.

You can be ovulating but still not have the right hormone regulation for correct womb lining/implantation. I know 3 women who had the same issue as you and didn't manage to get pregnant till they completely stopped breastfeeding.

Was this an NHS GP?

If so, their answer makes complete sense. They don’t have time to explain what could happen in various different scenarios that might not happen in future, and why would they waste time and resources investigating something when the answer is most likely to be something that the patient has already told them and is easily rectified?

Your expectations are unrealistic on the NHS, a private doctor will give you the time and attention you want.

I fell pregnant within 2 months of stopping breastfeeding of that helps.

@1940s

No you can have the signs of ovulation but unless you are having follicle tracking ultrasounds to confirm an egg is released there is no way of knowing for certain