TTC 35+ Thread 4 Cougar and Silver Fox Club

@Highlandmama - Thanks for replying :) Yeah, same here... we absolutely would like a second child... if it was straightforward. I'm now remembering what our feelings were before we started trying (at the start of this year) - and it was very much "if it works out, then great". But as soon as we were threatened with the lack of choice, my feelings became more complex! I worry about the alone thing too. But I'd still worry about that if we had two kids! Or three! I hope by the time our daughter is an adult, she'll have support in the form of good friends and perhaps a loving partner too.

@CurlyNo2 - That's totally understandable (sorry to hear you were unhappy growing up). I had a sibling and so did my husband, which is partly why I'd like our daughter to have a similar experience... but there was only a 2-year difference with my brother, so it wouldn't be quite the same for our daughter anyway. Also, as the 'last resort' of IVF only has a 10% chance of success, it's most likely we'll have no choice in the matter... so we have to make peace with it and look at the positives.

@Qwom - That's understandable, too. I think it's a bit different for me, as we had our daughter together three years ago. I really hope it works out for you.

@Highlandmama fingers crossed for a smooth process!
@CC81 I have an 11 yo ds from a previous relationship that was abusive. I seem actually pretty desperate to experience a pregnancy within a loving relationship. I will be pretty gutted if it doesn't work out for us

I'm not that comfortable with my son being an only child. Both me and my husband are only children and because of our upbringing we definitely don't want this for our child. If we can't conceive number 2 naturally, we will probably look to other assistance.

Hi @NaughtyNiffler 👋 I’m 37 and trying for number two as well. Here’s hoping it’s not a long slog.
@CC81 I have one DS and have mixed feelings about staying a single child family. I wouldn’t be on here if I were 100% content with it!! Main worry is that he would be on his own if anything happened to us. But we have a lovely supportive family and I hope he can spend plenty of time with his cousins who are around the same age. We were told it could take “many years” for us to conceive naturally and although it’s happened twice in 5 years, I think there’s a real possibility we might not have more. I love my wee rainbow miracle and am so thankful just for him. But keeping hopeful/prayerful for another 😊

Hello everyone! Sorry I've been quiet lately - I took a step back to have a think about everything. I had a session with a fertility counsellor yesterday, which was super-helpful, but churned up all my feelings!

Do you mind me asking how many of you currently have a single-child family? And how you feel about it, if a second one doesn't happen?

While we're still trying (and will continue for now), we're probably about 80% ready to accept our family of three. In some ways it's quite exciting, looking forward to the future, and especially all the things we can do with our daughter in the next few years.

Of course, there's still the 20% of 'what if'... which is what I find really tough. The option of IVF is there, but the statistical chance of it working (with low egg supply) is less than 10%. It COULD still happen naturally, but equally unlikely within the next 12 months (and we don't want to drag it out longer than that).

I think my feelings are confused by social pressures and the assumption that we 'should' give our daughter a sibling. But it's probably not possible, so it may be better to accept that and focus on her, rather than sink our attention into a year of IVF. But there's that 'what if'...

Hello all!
My partner and I have decided to start TTC. I am 37 and can't help feeling like it's going to be a slog. I have an 11 yo from a previous relationship. I am also being treated for severe depression but the last few months have been nice and stable, I'm going to have to change from my current antidepressant ,paroxetine, and on to sertraline. So not actually TTC until my meds have switched and we've had a meeting with my psychiatrist.
Anyway, just here for reassurance and support :-) xx

Sorry @Sleeeeeepy @LT103 and @Keepeas It feels so disappointing. But yes - onwards and upwards. hopefully this is the month for you all! You are all in sync!

I'm definitely out too. CD1 today. Even after 4 negative tests I was still holding out hope! 😔🤦‍♀️ I know the chances of eventually getting pregnant don't reduce each month that we ttc without success, but it does feel that way.
Think my OHs disappointment is getting to me too.

No chance to test this month. Af came early 😭. I wasn’t holding out much hope for this month so onwards and upwards. Cd2 here!

@Sleeeeeepy sorry to hear af arrived for you too!

Hi everyone, how are we all doing?

We have decided not to use OPKs this month and just see what happens.

Fingers crossed!

@Highlandmama lol 😂 it’s as if you know he said to me on Thursday so this weekend are we busy I can home if you want me be his currently working away and I said no it’s okay you stay at work sooner you finish sooner you will be home I have no desire neither energy to do it I feel sick 🤢 il try and see if I feel better if I take them at bed time instead

@Trying4mylastmiracle yes suspect it might be coming off the pill to be honest. Doubt it’s folic acid but you could try taking at a different time of day and see if that helps? Maybe after dinner? AF also due on the 22nd for me! This is the pleasant nausea and anxiety free portion of the month for me! Hope you feel better soon and aren’t too queasy for the BD!

@Highlandmama thank you for your response my period is not due till the 22nd I’ve skip one today zero folic acid I can’t god backache , I’m not cramping just got this dull feeling , nausea it’s driving me Crazy I feel right off so whether it’s still the side effects of coming off the pill or folic acid it’s making me feel right off and miserable at the minute

@trying4mylastmiracle I’m having terrible nausea in the run up to my period. Not sure if it’s the TTC vitamins tbh, wondering if it’s just hormonal. Periods have changed a fair bit since having my DS. Seem to remember having bad nausea in my teens too before periods, to the point of being sick...doesn’t answer your question but I can sympathise!

Hi everyone is anyone getting nausea from folic acid ?dont wanna stop taking it because of my age wanna try and take it till who knows not sure if it’s folic acid or the side effect off coming off the since my last dodgey period well what I thaught was a period gonna test Wednesday morning just put my mind at rest so I can wait for my period in peace this symptom spotting going on in the back of head ain’t good at the moment

Morning everyone, hope we are all doing ok.
1dpo for me here. From my back pains I'm pretty sure I ovulated yesterday.

Bought myself red raspberry leaf extract pills yesterday. Anyone use them?

I’ve had a break from thinking about ttc last week or so. Just not feeling it this cycle. Fairly sure we didn’t time things right so I’ve kind of not even been thinking about it. Just realised I’m 8dpo and not been symptom spotting at all. Expecting af to show in a few days and then will start afresh

Hope everyone is doing ok. Sorry about the bfns @Sleeeeeepy and @Keepeas

I would also recommend reflexology. I've had a few sessions now once a month and my periods are no longer painful and my cycle has regulated to 28 days. I've heard accupunture is great too so I would like to try it. What suppliments can people recommend? I'm on conceive plus but iv been reading about folic acid and apparently we should really be having the natural form of folate. Does any one have any recommendations?

@Sleeeeeepy I tested this morning, but BFN...dont feel like my period is due yet so still holding out that I'm not out. But hopefully I won't keep waking up at 5am to test for the next few days 🙈

@CurlyNo2 really? That’s interesting. I’ve booked my acupuncture up now but il certainly look into reflexology. Anything’s worth a shot isn’t it, just trying all natural ways now before we embark upon IVF.