TTC after MC - July 2020 (Thread 6)

@MrsK21 excellent news about the referral. It’s such a relief isn’t it when you know something is being done. It’s an instant lift I think.

@chloedancer897 no need to thank me, we have all been through or are going through tough times. You’ve all been wonderful to me and I want to always try and do the same.
Definitely get some things booked for the next few weeks, and I think maybe speaking to your doctor will help and understand if there’s anything they can do for you. We are always here though xx

@VP91x new hair sounds fabulous! And lovely you booked a lunch - always nice to go somewhere with a new do!
And yes to the wine - enjoy while you can, as soon you’ll be dry for a long while 🤞🏼

Thank you everyone. You're all being so kind and helpful. And even just vocalising my feelings helps because I do feel quite alienated with my problems. My parents are both gone and I don't have any sisters so I find it hard to chat to people about it.

I think I will try to contact someone about acupuncture. I had contacted someone pre-Covid so I'll follow that up.

Thanks again everyone. I have had several cries today and even a desperate moment of prying open the tests in the hope that I saw a hint of a line but no such luck. Fx to everyone else trying this cycle. I really hope to see some BFPs or at least peaks on the OPKs to keep me going x

@VP91x I'm so glad your hair has stopped falling too and you've managed to treat yourself at the salon. Amazing what a bit of pampering can do!

@Northernsoul90 I'm lucky I managed to get this referral, normally they're so reluctant to do anything but I'm fortunate to have private cover so hopefully can get seen soon-ish. I'm feeling so anxious because I have no control over anything my body is doing/not doing. I'm a classic Type A personality and the not knowing and lack of control is killing me.
How are you getting on with the OPKs? I waited the 10 mins to read the One Step ones as the colour continued developing over the 10 mins. I never got a peak on them though but the instructions did say a peak will show within a couple of minutes xx

@chloedancer897 I'm so sorry you're having such a rough time of it. I won't pretend to know what you are going through after trying for so long, I can only imagine the frustration you must be feeling. My OH keeps trying to remind me of all the other good things we have in our life and I'm trying to focus on the positives which has been helping me get through some of my sadder times. I really hope you get some update from the IVF clinic soon and you can start that journey xxx

@chloedancer897 so sorry for how you’re feeling at the moment. Have you thought about acupuncture / reflexology? I have looked into this and think will give it a go once it is safe to do so post ERPC. People have said it helps with the body finding its balance again. Apologies I’ve got nothing else but thought perhaps this is something that you might want to look into xxx

@chloedancer897 I'm sorry that you are having such a tough time with things. It really does take its toll after a while and is physically and emotionally draining. I think getting away for a while and refocusing does sound like a good idea and maybe not doing opks for a cycle or two as they become so consuming. I'm not going to give you the 'relax and it will happen' because I would feel like screaming if somebody said that to me (which they have before now 😐) but if you are feeling really stressed over ttc maybe you could look for some relaxation type things to alleviate a bit of stress? I know my cycles are always affected when I'm stressed as well. I really hope you are feeling a bit better soon, sending virtual hugs 💕

@MrsK21 Fantastic GP has agreed! At least you know you've set the ball rolling now. I know it's been so long winded 😫 hopefully our bodies will go back to normal soon.

Ladies when do you read your opks? The one step ones say sometimes it takes 10 mins for an accurate result to show - the line starts off fainter but then get stronger closer to the 10 minute mark. Is this what others find or do you read them after a couple of mins?

@chloedancer897 aw that's rotten they haven't been very helpful. Xx

@HE88 I have contacted them several times and they're less than unhelpful! I just have to hold on I think x

@MichT4 thank you so much and I know you are grieving at the minute so thank you for being so thoughtful. I think you are right. Booking things and making plans is a good idea because I'm just living day to day and wishing my life away waiting for the right time to test. It's not healthy. I might ring my consultant again and also book in for some counselling although this thread has been so amazingly helpful and you have all been amazing at giving me support xo

@MichT4 success! My GP agreed to do the referral for the gynaecologist. I think the GPs must all be in a good mood this week, I was so shocked when she said she'll write the referral today - was speechless!
And yeah, I bet in the time it takes me to get an appt with a gynae I reckon AF will have come and gone lol

@VP91x
Yes, you are right, when you're waiting for it, it seems like a much longer wait. What did you get done to your hair in the end? I bet it looks and feels fab. My hair fall has slowed down now thankfully but I can tell its lost so much volume, hopefully all grows back....

Been really tired today guys, I did a lot yesterday though, I mean considering I only passed the baby on Monday I’m doing well really. Really want to go food shop with the husband tonight so I can pick some healthier options. Had a nap on sofa till now and dog needs to go out so lunch then so that I think. Doing another preg test later see if that second lines anymore faded. Putting together a box of baby bits today so that all my things are stored in one special memory box and I will put it safely away incase I ever want to look. Just got my pregnancy tests out from when I first found out, they are in there. It’s all so sad. I didn’t cry looking at them though so hopefully I’m getting a bit stronger xx

@VP91x what did you have done in the end? Any OPKs today?

@chloedancer897 I'm sorry you are feeling low. I don't know the solution but it definitely isn't good for you or OH to be feeling like this about it. It's so hard once you've suffered a loss, but ultimately we shouldn't look at TTC as though it's a chore or a miserable time. It's definitely already helped my mindset this month to book things to do - it's the thing that made the first MC hardest was being in lockdown. So now I've decided we will do things again and keep busy, with TTC as a sideline.
Sorry, I know that is so easy to say and you have had a long journey, but the countdown of days isn't how life should be, and I'm sure we have all been guilty of that. It's sad to look back and think each day was just waiting for the next. I hope you are feeling better and can find a suitable distraction to keep you going. Is it worth asking for more tests?

@MrsK21 that's great that you've got the ball rolling. It'll probably trigger AF now, just the way of the world!

xx

@Pugprincess thats my worry that I'm no longer in their list but I've never had a discharge letter from them. It's just the lack of teaching jobs here that's the worry! Xx

@HE88 yes still under clinic. They don’t even know I fell pregnant. One of my jobs will be to call them and explain what’s happened. I think I want to say I need some healing time so to please keep me on the list ready to start if possible as I don’t want to be discharged and chucked right back to the start. But rather than healing time I’m actually meaning some more trying naturally time. Ah Scotland sound like they have it together with so many things! Schools being able to use TAS to cover has really messed up my job. I was doing it years and had pension set up and everything. But it’s just drying up x

@chloedancer897 hopefully you can get the ivf ball rolling soon have you contacted them? Xx

@Pugprincess ah I thought you were England when you said about teaching assistants being able to teach you can't do that here in Scotland. Fingers crossed the changes help you fall naturally then, I'm guessing you are still a patient with the fertility clinic then? Xx

@Northernsoul90 thank you for the company. Really hope you get a negative soon, it's been so dragged out for both of us.
I've got private medical through my work, just spoke to them and they were so lovely and helpful and have authorised a gynaecologist to do some investigations. Just need my GP to do the referral now so hopefully she agrees rather than keep me hanging!

@vp91x thank you for sharing your experience too. 8 weeks is such a long time! I'm only 2 away from that now, maybe it'll turn up soon but I'll get the process going with doctors just in case it doesn't.
Hope you're having a lovely day, trip to the hairdressers sounds like a dream! X

@HE88 yes I’m in Leicestershire England, I’m like you and hopeful it will happen naturally for me again. Especially with this extra fertile thing if that’s true. For me personally I know what I was doing wrong pre lockdown so I feel I need to try naturally under less work stress and better health but if I don’t after a few cycles and start getting frustrated I will definitely go back for IUI. My school know about my pregnancy and mc so hopefully they would be supportive with me needing to nip back and forth to hospital during work hours for treatments. X

@HE88 yes I've had all the tests. Nothing wrong. Everything in working order. I'm on the list for IVF but my appointment was cancelled because of coronavirus. God knows where I am on the list now. It's taken over my life. I'm wishing months away waiting to test and I'm not enjoying anything

@chloedancer897 we have been the same when we began our ttc journey we weren't actively trying then we did start properly trying. After a year I went to my doctor got bloods taken and the 21 day ovulation bloods all came back normal, gave it another 3 cycles still nothing went back to the doctor who referred me to a fertility clinic. I'm not sure if you have mentioned about being tested or not? It's just so frustrating that your body has fallen pregnant before so why can't it do it again! Xx

@2020wish it's due on Friday. I know I'm out. It's too late for implantation and I bet she'll come bang on time like she always does

@HE88 I'm so sorry you've been on such a long journey. We have taken little breaks where I'm not doing ovulation sticks or checking timing and it's never worked. I'd say a period of 6-9 months where we weren't trying actively but not preventing to take the stress off. And nothing. I just don't think it's meant to happen.