Preconception planning - anyone want to join?

@sunflowersaremyfav93 with the twin thing you are correct. It also depends on if identical or non identical. Identical is not hereditary (although there is some evidence that tendency towards it may be). If fraternal twins then him having it in the family will have no impact on your likelihood of having twins as it depends on how many eggs the woman releases on each cycle. However, if you have a daughter together it will increase her chances of having twins.

@MsQueenInTheNorth thank you :) this is why I need to track as I have no real idea of when I ovulate I was sure it would be fine then after DTD had sheer panic haha! don’t even know why I panicked so much when I want a baby so much lol! I’m a mess haha!

@KittyT30 congratulations!! I think gin and tonic without the gin is a good idea, if that’s something that you’d normally drink? Or if you were feeling really committed you could decant a bottle of non alcoholic wine in to an empty wine bottle and then it wouldn’t matter if your in laws saw the bottle?

@mackjm20 I’m fairly certain you’ll be fine You’d have to have ovulated exceptionally late in your cycle (day 24ish) for an egg to still be viable? I have fairly regular 26/27 cycles and nearly always ovulated on day 14 or 15 when I used Natural Cycles for tracking. I think the latest I ever ovulated was day 18, so still a long time before my period.

My grandma was a twin, I don’t know if there are any more sets though and I don’t think once counts as running in families!
My ex boyfriend did say once when we were talking about babies that we would be very likely to have twins because they ran in his family too... I did very gently explain to him that it didn’t make any difference to us whether they ran in his family or not!

@olderthanyouthink haha cocky! Pardon the pun! Thanks just needed talking down from my panic lol!

@Bells3032 absolutely you know when you just have a panic! It would still be amazing if it accidentally happened before nov just not the plan so going to be much more careful :)

I’ve been so desperate to start ttc and this morning there’s me having a full mini breakdown! I’m losing the plot lol. DH thinks I’m mad- self confessed x

@olderthanyouthink yes twins can run in your family - they run in mine. Everyones first question when someone is my family is pregnant is "how many?". But apparently it's only non-identical twins that are hereditary as it depends on how many eggs a woman releases in her cycle. Identical are a fluke - although we have two sets of those as well (and i know of at least 4 sets of non-identical in my direct family line too). My DH is dying for twins to get it all done in one go (his treatments are painful and expensive) but having looked after twins I really don't want that.

@KittyT30 how are you feeling? I agree with PP about picking a mixer drink and then just not adding it. I always joke no one will ever realise I am pregnant - I don't drink much anyway and my fridge is always filled with pickles and cheese!

@mackjm20 to be fair even when done perfectly conception chances are still only about 1 in 3 so i think the chances are very low. Would it be that awful if it was a few months early?

@mackjm20 you got cocky?! Hahaha🤣 I think your chances are pretty low

"The likelihood of getting pregnant right before your period is extremely low. For women with a typical 28- to 30-day cycle or longer and their cycles are regular, it is fairly safe to say your ovulation occurred between Day 11 and Day 21. The egg is only available for 12 to 24 hours for conception."

americanpregnancy.org/getting-pregnant/can-you-get-pregnant-on-your-period-9163

just asking for a friend... it’s such a low chance to get pregnant if you do the deed 4 days before AF right? Right?

Oh gosh morning freak out! DH and I just DTD AF due Monday and seem to be On a pretty regular cycle now. I don’t know why we did it unprotected it seemed fine in the moment and the app and everything I know says VERY low chance of getting pregnant.

But now I’m stressing like what if all the research is wrong. I’ve spent all my life preventing and now the research has got me all cocky in the moment lol! It’s meant to be November ahhh! Needless to say I don’t think I can cope with the stress of tracking low fertile days! Condoms it is from now!

Someone please tell me it would be like a near miracle conception (less than 1%) chance for this to happen?!

@mackjm20 & @Lollipop87 technically I reduced hours at the start of the year ago but only actually worked like that for a really short time

I don't know of any twins in the family, would just be our luck (DP just got his first grown up type job and thought he'd actually have money, then I got pregnant like 2 weeks later)

@sunflowersaremyfav93 it will be confirmed in about a week but no one is optimistic.

I think it's the woman that can have twins run in the family, something like some women are more likely to put out more than one egg and then fraternal twins happen. Identical twins are a fluke.

I got a call from the GP about my blood test, my prolactin level is high and they want to redo the test to rule out stress making it high. I said you are never going to get a needle in me and not have me incredibly stressed. She suggested various time frames ranging from next week to a few months to see if it changes and I replied that it wouldn't make a difference to my stress level, the only possible difference is the frequency of DD breastfeeding because she'll be at nursery for a bit or the week. I only realised this evening that there was no mention of my weight loss, a quick bit of research says that prolactin can prevent weight loss?! I need to go back to them and try and clear some of that up but I just shut down when people start talking about more needles

@KittyT30 my friend has always been really into having prosecco on a night out, we were our for dinner for her birthday and she was sharing a bottle with her sister (or so I thought!) - her sister just kept sipping from her glass every so often and I never noticed!! You could do that when out, but at your house I reckon just pour from a different bottle while standing at the fridge and no one will even notice. Good luck!

@KittyT30 congratulations!! My manager at my old job was secretly pregnant on our Christmas do and she was drinking gin and lemonades all night... or so we thought! She was just having lemonade but we never for a second thought there wasn't gin in there as it looks the same - we only knew afterwards when she told us about the pregnancy. I reckon gin is a good way to go, and as it's your house you can make the drinksso they'll never know!

@KittyT30 I would defo go for an non alcoholic one and just pop that in your glass instead so many good non-alcoholic alternatives :) also way easier at your house as you will be topping your own glass up :)

That way you can reserve the ‘headache’ or ‘working early’ excuses for at their house! Haha I’ve put a lot of thought into this as my in-laws would clock me not drinking immediately if not x

@KittyT30 If you think you can get away with it I would just pour yourself a small glass of whatever everyone else is drinking and leave it untouched? Or arrange things in such a way that your OH can drink some of your glass as well? (Glasses next to each other on the table so he can pick up either without anyone noticing.)

Alternatively a wine-looking drink or another alternative (a ‘G’&T? A non-alcoholic beer?) might be a good shout.

@KittyT30 what wine would you normally drink?
There is non alcoholic prosecco these days...not sure how it tastes though.
Get some of that schloer...think it looks quite wine like?
Is your MIL nosey?

Guys enjoy your glasses of wine now, before u know it you'll be off it for 9 months and then breast feeding on top of it🤣...

I have my in laws over tomorrow evening for dinner. We made the decision not to tell them until first scan. Now I'm trying to think of ways to hide I'm not drinking, especially when I'm hosting and would normally have wine. Any tips or tricks??

@sunflowersaremyfav93 I am right here with you, eating like it’s my job at the moment!

I am trying to watch the booze but the odd glass here and there surely isn’t a problem? @wrensandrobins, that wine sounds amazing!

I have been convinced for years and years that I’ll end up with twins, can’t decide if that’d be a good thing or not! No reason to believe I will, though, just a sense...

@olderthanyouthink that sucks with regards to how they calculate the pay, seems unfair if you’ve only been part time a short while?!

@sunflowersaremyfav93 I definitely don’t think you can damage your eggs by having the odd drink, I will stop in my two week waits just in case but if and when my period comes I will still have a glass of wine at the weekends. I think we’d all end up getting more stressed if we cut it out completely, and I agree with @mackjm20 that you have to give it up for long enough when pregnant and breastfeeding so might as well enjoy it while we can 😂

@wrensandrobins well done on the weight loss that’s amazing!!!

Omgosh maybe you and @sunflowersaremyfav93 might both end up having twins!

Your home made wine sounds amazing! I don’t drink at all in the week but if I go out on a weekend it would probably class as ‘binge’ drinking oops... will defo stop it before ttc but going to keep enjoying the small pleasures in life until then :)

@KittyT30 congratulations!!! Very exciting news!

I'm still drinking, I make wine and I just bottled a beautiful rhubarb and red currant, zero chance of me not enjoying that while I can 👍 it's really just an occasional glass at the weekend, I'm not a binge drinker 🤣

@sunflowersaremyfav93 if you have non identical twins in your maternal line you are more likely to have twins- your genetically more likely to release multiple eggs- my mum is a non identical twin- other factors that increase your chances of twins include being over 30, being obese and being tall. I'm over 30, but hopefully by next week I will no longer be obese!!! I'm 1lb away from being 'overweight' also I'm only 5 ft 2 🤣

@sunflowersaremyfav93 exactly! Everything in moderation :) you are so good! I have still been drinking if I’m totally honest and will continue to do so until I am actually ttc... not sure if that’s wrong but I’m not ready to go t-total in prep lol! I love wine and cheese to much to give it up for longer than needed :)