Preconception planning - anyone want to join?

@Nate1 we'll have to be TTC buddies :) What are your plans. We live just inside greater london and looking to move to the london/herts border. Trying to find something near by dad and sister. I was very happy with the budget yetsterday. Where abouts do you live?

@Bells3032 I wish you all the best especially for your husbands treatment! Maybe we will (non) actively ttc at the same time then.
Love that you're looking for a house :)! I've visited a friend a few times just outside of London and love the english countryside.

@Nate1 The plan is to stop "not trying" in October with the intention to actively try in January (in theory). This all depends on a few things like my husband passing his new job's probation in September, selling my flat and finding a new house to at least have in progress.

Plus my husband is a cancer survivor and is currently undergoing hormone treatments which we should know the outcome of late September but doctors are hopeful. So a lot of what ifs.

@wrensandrobins I'm taking folic acid, vit. D, vit. B12 and iodine. It's all in one pill though :) It's a prenatal. The iodine is recommended mostly in the area I live because of a sufficiency in many continental european areas.

@Bells3032 I know if we would wait we maybe would be waiting at least a year and even if covid would be "over" other illnesses may appear. So I think we should just live our life as good as possible :) . There are alway risks we can't eliminate. Sorry if you've wrote it before but when do you plan on ttc at the moment?

btw. I just downloaded the "glow" app and like it so far. :)

@Nate1 we've been going through a similar thought pattern ie do we wait for covid to be over. But we said we may be waiting years, I am about to turn 32 and my husband has fertility issues so it may take us a long time so don't want to wait much longer.

I have just realised that the multivitamins I have been taking have only half the folic acid I need in them, fortunately I have 4 months before I start TTC going to get some new ones today, what else is important vitamin wise preconception?

@MsQueenInTheNorth I do have to leave work 6 weeks before.
But because of the COVID situation I don‘t know if I can work regulary anyway when/if I‘m pregnant. I hope there won‘t be a second wave in fall or winter or spring :( I work with (small and not so small) children. We decided to go for a baby anyway because we don‘t want to wait another year and nobody seems to know if it‘ll be better then.

Has COVID played a roll in anyones family planning?

Thanks for talking about your apps I think I need one now :D

May I join? "Trying" for number 2 but my periods haven't returned and DD is 19 months but breastfeeding like a newborn

I think if CV hadn't happened and she was still going to childcare I might have been in a better position but we are where we are and my preferred small age gap is growing and I didn't want a summer baby but that my be the case. She'll start nursery in September so that will cut down feeds again and there's supposed to be a way to convince your body that you it support 3 of you, need to do some more reading but I know I need to put weight on (sorry! I weigh less than before I had her and I was slim) and take vitamins (keep forgetting).

I am using Ovia too. it said my fertile day was CD 14 which is when I did my OPK which was pretty dark so I think it was then or the day before. so it seems like that is pretty accurate. Good to have somewhere to log it all. just over a week till I am due on.

Must remember to get my vitamins later.

I never thought to look up what I would get paid so I looked up the mat pay for my work and its 6 weeks full pay, 12 @50% topped up with SMP and 21 weeks on SMP, then 13 weeks on nothing. Not sure if that is a good deal or not. It doesn't sound like a lot to live off of. Has made me realise I need to get saving and have a bit put away!

@queenatom I love having the data too- it was one of my favourite things about using Natural Cycles! I have Flo and Ovia at the moment and they don’t quite agree, although I have been using Flo for a lot longer.

Would you recommend Fertility Friend @CookieMonster3001? I probably don’t need another app () but I am quite enjoying using them. I can’t work out whether it’s a paid for one or not though?

@butterfly5291 that's a really good website! Thank you!

@queenatom I have been temping for 2 months now, and I have cracked down on the time I take my temp, but my sleep is a bit rough now and then so have quite a spikey graph, however I have to admit it is still giving me a vague idea of period/ovulation (I think). Once I start doing OPKs I think it will really help me to drill down ovulation. I found using fertility friend has been a really good app to use as it plots the graphs for you and you can put in a whole heap of information.

I'm a data geek so I was the same and like to have multiple graphs and all sorts on the go to see whats going on with the body. It probably is a bit over kill, but I kinda enjoy it!

Having said that, my app put my ovulation date down on CD 14 based on just temps, and when I put in CM info, it changed it to CD 16. I removed the info of CM because to be honest I was just guessing and it moved it back to CD 14 and period due Monday. So now I am kinda confused as to when I am due! I can imagine this can cause so many issues when it comes to actually TTC!

Thanks @MsQueenInTheNorth - I think I am in a similar boat, even when I'm not an insomniac it's not unusual for me to wake up a couple of times in the night. Perhaps I just need to stick with the OPKs and symptom awareness for now and save temping for down further down the line. I just love the idea of having all this extra data to look at!

@queenatom Yes, I think so. A colleague of mine went on maternity leave back in the spring, and I’m fairly certain that she said she was only getting SMP. I don’t know whether people who are more senior than me will get something better, but we do the same job so I assume I’ll get the same as her!

Sorry to hear you’re struggling with the temping, I found it hard when I used natural cycles as I wake up quite a lot in the night so the number isn’t valid. I think I’m going to stick with using the cheap LH test strips from amazon for now and see how that affects the data on my apps.

@MsQueenInTheNorth I have some friends who work for charities, most have been SMP only but one or two had enhanced packages (albeit they were at slightly larger charities). I suppose you have to work on the basis of SMP only and then it'll be a pleasant surprise if there's anything more?

Having a nightmare trying to get started on temping accurately - have had two shocking nights sleep in a row (awake from 1am to 4 - 4.30am) so I doubt my readings are worth anything. Thinking I might just sack it off until I get my first bleed and then try again. Hopefully I'll get a decent kip tonight as I'm seriously flagging!

12 weeks full salary would be lovely @Nate1! Do you have to start your maternity leave 6 weeks before the baby is due, or can you hold on for a bit longer?

I’m the same @wrensandrobins! I haven’t specifically asked, but I think it’s just the basic. I think that’s the norm for most registered charities?

Statutory Maternity Pay ( SMP ) is paid for up to 39 weeks. You get: 90% of your average weekly earnings (before tax) for the first 6 weeks. £151.20 or 90% of your average weekly earnings (whichever is lower) for the next 33 weeks.

So for the next 7 or so months you have to live on £600 a month

I wish I had a job with even a little maternity pay, but I work for a small charity!

Statutory Maternity Pay ( SMP ) is paid for up to 39 weeks. You get: 90% of your average weekly earnings (before tax) for the first 6 weeks. £151.20 or 90% of your average weekly earnings (whichever is lower) for the next 33 weeks.

So for the next 7 or so months you have to live on £600 a month

I wish I had a job with even a little maternity pay, but I work for a small charity!

@JamesZebra I‘m taking folic acid and vit d too :) my prenatal also includes iodine and my doctor said it‘s important but I can‘t really remember why. Sorry
Does anyone of you take it?

@MsQueenInTheNorth I get the basic plan too which for me is 2-3 month full salary around the birth (6 weeks before due Date and 6 after birth) and then I‘ll get 60% of my last salary for up to 10 month (paid from tax money not the companies) but they take the average out of my last year so I must have had my job for at leasteone year to get that.
How about you?

That’s really helpful @butterfly5291, thank you!

As far as I’m aware I will only get the basic maternity pay, which isn’t great. How do things work for you @Nate1?

Based on what you guys have said I am going to grab some folic acid and vit d tomorrow. Is there anything else I should get?

Hi :) interesting to read about your mat pay and leave. It‘s quite different than here. Hope it‘ll work out perfectly for all of you. :)

I can totally relate to the thinking/worrying about finances. I tend to overthink that too (as well as getting pregnant apparently :D) Although I do think that it‘s very important to know what‘s what moneywise. :) Thumbs up for us.

@butterfly5291 that looks really good, thanks

I've just found this website maternity.money/
You put in your salary, due date, date your mat leave starts and then what mat pay you get, so i get 16 weeks full pay then 23 weeks SMP.
It calculated my current take home pay pretty accurately (deducts pension and student loan but nothing else yet)
Really helps give you a month by month picture.

Thanks for recommendations, I will definitely add it to my shopping list.

No I haven’t been on the pill for ages as it affected my moods so much. Used condoms for a while and then had the copper coil which I’ve just had taken out.

My diet is ok, very rarely drink & my BMI is fine. Although I’ve started exercising as I didn’t really do any!

Completely relate to people’s comments about finances; I created a spreadsheet last week and I don’t know how we’ll survive on my maternity pay We’ve started saving now!

@sunflowersaremyfav93 I'm so sorry that you are so stressed at the moment. Big hugs to you. I got my vit D pills in the post today and they are tiny, so no chance of splitting them!! 4000IU apparently is the highest safe dosage so hopefully should be fine until I get to the Dr's for my smear and I might just ask about it then.

I do worry about money sometimes. Me and hubby both earn a decent amount, and I get 4 and half months full pay and 12 months leave but I think with the whole coronavirus situation, does leave me feeling more worried about things than I normally would. One thing that helps is the amount of family that have just recently had a baby and have said they have put a tonne of stuff to the side for when its my time so hoping that will help cut costs a lot!

@OneStepOneStumble I really hope you get your house stuff sorted and your TTC journey doesn't get delayed any more than you want it to be.

@butterfly5291 I'm glad your feeling a bit better about the situation and sounds like you and OH are on the same page about a baby being priority

@JamesZebra you are so right with trying to keep a positive attitude. My hubbies best friend send a pic late last night to let us know she just had a baby girl, and although I so wanted to be happy for her, I was kinda gutted, even though we haven't even started trying!