Preconception planning - anyone want to join?

We are waiting till December and it feels like so far away! I only started my job in January though and they are amazing so it doesn't seem fair to immediately get pregnant, I'm glad to have found this because i also had nobody but my mum/ partner to talk to and I swear I'm boring them to death 🤣 the chatter and getting healthy is giving a focus for the excited energy I have right now

@queenatom I’m the same, I’ve been ready to go since January!! In a way I’m kind of glad we didn’t start back then as it would have been sad not to be able to both be at the scans, but I am soooo ready to have a baby! I don’t think the same biological need is there for men, or at least it doesn’t shout and scream at them so loudly! My mum doesn’t understand why we don’t just start now, she’s like “but you know you both want children so why wait”, but then she’s from the era when you would just stop using contraception as soon as you got married. The only reason I’m quite happy to wait now is I feel like I understand my DH’s thoughts about it a lot more since chatting last night, and I also read that it’s best to take folic acid for 2-3 months before TTC if you can and I only started taking it on 1st July.

@queenatom it's so hard waiting. One of the main reasons we're waiting a few months is because I'm on a hen party with work friends in September and the moment I say I'm not drinking they'll all guess. My poker face is terrible so I might as well just declare it there and then. If we start trying straight away and get pregnant straight off then I might have only just found out myself so don't feel like having to explain myself to them all. Besides being sober on am overnight hen party is not much fun. Sometimes it does seem a silly reason to wait but I'm sure I'll survive. Having this group with lots of others to chat to who are waiting until Sept/Oct to TTC should help 🤞

@lollipop87 I definitely agree that we're so lucky to have groups like this to be able to chat to others in the same situation about it. Other than my best friend no one else knows that we're potentially TTC again soon and I don't want to bore her to tears with always going on about it.

@Lollipop87 the hot tub sounds like bliss!!!

I am certainly glad we have one another to talk to. I thought I was going a bit nuts before finding this thread

@mackjm20 @Pebbleinthesand I’m definitely in a similar place. To be honest, I’d be happy to crack on now but my husband wants to wait a little longer, and objectively it makes sense to let my cycle stabilise etc. Occasionally I just want to tell him to get straight to it and get the party started! Trying to resist the urge as I don’t want to push too hard and ultimately it’s only a few months longer - it’s hard sometimes though!

@CharWils hi! Yes we love that book on here, we now call it the bible 😂 I still haven’t read more as I’m almost scared to read the next chapter which is about miscarriage.

@Pebbleinthesand my sister had her Mirena coil taken out straight after her wedding and got pregnant on her first cycle the following month. She said she had one monster period a couple of weeks after and that was luckily her only one 😂 I totally know what you mean, I’m just so excited!

I was telling my mum about this thread and she was like “oh we never had that in my day, you had to wait until you were actually pregnant and could go to nct classes to finally talk to other women about it”, so I do think we’re lucky to have more technology these days!

@sunflowersaremyfav93 yeah, small bump (I measured a bit small toward the end but not worryingly so) and small 6lb baby. I'm no where near getting pregnant I think but I'm still like how do I tell them, when do I tell them, will they be annoyed, what will the others think (huge staff turn over, I barely know anyone)????

"The chapter about ovulation and timing sex blew my mind! I never realised how short a window there actually is for the egg to get fertilised!"

... DD was an accident, 2 condom slips and 2 morning after pills (taken very soon after) within a few days of each other #2 is already more of a challenge

My low BMI (16/17) almost cost me more while sorting out life insurance the other day you lot just reminded me to take my vitamins though!

@Pebbleinthesand Omgosh I’m exactly the same! Like I know the sensible thing to do is wait until September but at the same time I have moments when I’m SO IMPATIENT! Haha so nice to be speaking to others who feel the same :)

Thanks @mackjm20. Hopefully it won't be too long before my cycle starts up again then.

It's so weird how we can be waiting for a specific date/event/time to TTC and yet still be impatient to get going 😂

Half the time I feel like yelling 'impregnate me now!' to DH and the other half of the time I'm discussing the pros of waiting a few months 😜

@Pebbleinthesand well done you on the weight loss. I had my mirena coil out in Jan and periods returned in feb - my cycle still varies slightly but getting there :)

@CharWils the impatient woman’s guide is fab I downloaded it after the recommendations on here and have been reading a little bit everyday :)

Hi all,
Do you mind if I join? Have been reading through and looks like a great thread to be on whilst TTC for the first time!
I am 33 and have just come off the cerelle pill Tuesday this week after being on either that or the Implant since I was 18 so I can't even remember a normal cycle!
I am taking well woman gummies which have the folic acid and vitamin D in them, only started yesterday. I had a chat with my doctor today who said they were fine and to avoid vitamin E but from reading I am sure they meant vitamin A?
I have been looking at the good impatient woman guide to getting pregnant which from looking at all your posts seems like it comes highly recommended?

My BMI is just over 25 having lost 3st with slimming world since my last preganacy. I had gestational diabetes when I was pregnant with DD so I'm desperate to not repeat that. Daily insulin, diet, blood tests and being induced was not my idea of a good time.

I'm technically at my target weight with slimming world now and clothes wise I'm happy but thi k ill try and lose another half a stone before TTC just to put my BMI right and give me the best chance of not putting on too much and developing gestational diabetes again.

Not read the 'bible' but the approach to actually trying seems similar to what we did with DD and I got pregnant within the first month. I've never actually checked when I ovulate. I need to wait for my first period after my coil out to even begin to work that out.

Has anyone had a mirena coil out before and know how long it's taken for periods to come back?

@Lollipop87 it’s so nice that your DH is now excited too :) also so cute for your anniversary! Laughed about him not wanting to call it BD’ing! When I tell my DH about parts of the book he looks at me like I’m mad haha!

My DH like yours only has to look at a carrot to drop the lbs so unfair!

@Nate1 totally agree about a lot of it being irrelevant initially ! Also feel like you said exercise can’t be bad unless excessive :) However like you said passes the time :)

@wrensandrobins huge well done on the weight loss! Especially in lock down!

@queenatom @JamesZebra sounds like you are both doing all the right things :) I’m trying to lose weight too and have yoyo’d for years but I feel like every lb counts and all that so even if over the healthier the better :)

@sunflowersaremyfav93 sounds like you are doing all the right things. Totally makes sense and sounds like you are being so supportive by encouraging what’s best for him :) x

@sunflowersaremyfav93 that’s what made me put on weight 3 years ago, losing my dad. Funny how grief affects people in different ways, would have been better to be one of those people who can’t eat and goes super skinny but you can’t pick how you deal with it sadly and I’m definitely an emotional eater. My husband only has to eat the tiniest bit better and do tiniest bit more exercise for weight to drop off him, it’s so unfair! I think he’ll always be one of these lean types.

@JamesZebra I’m so glad the vitamins are helping, my mood is definitely better too! I’m off to my mum’s now to go in her hot tub and have a glass of prosecco, need to make the most of it before I have to go a few months without either!

@sunflowersaremyfav93 yes I think i could definitely encourage my boyfriend to lose some weight. He's really tall but carries it all on his tummy. It worries me sometimes however I looked on the BMI chart and he would only need to lose about 2 stone which is not a lot......he works nights and insists on taking absolute rubbish in with him. I think he needs to want to lose weight for it to happen, but it wouldn't take much.
My first job is to get him taking some vitamins which he is interested in now I said it might help with his hair growth

@JamesZebra vitamins are great aren't they :D I was surprised too. My mood is way better haha.

@sunflowersaremyfav93 My grandma used to say "Let them (men) think they are in control - that's the key :D"

just wanted to say that this thread gave me a massive kick up the bum to take some vitamins (I have been meaning to for ages)
A couple of days in and I have so much more energy - I think my iron levels must have been really low and going by google its looks like low Iron can cause issues with fertility!
I feel like I am finally taking charge of things and taking proper care of myself which is quite liberating!

@queenatom I have quite a way to go just to get out of the obese category (about 3 stone) I think i will have a party when I am just classed as overweight and even then it says I should lose another 2 stone to be in the healthy range.......it feels very daunting but I am going to keep trying to chip away at it each week and see what the future holds.
I think if you are taking care of yourself and getting exercise, then sometimes that has the desired effect with weight loss. Stress is your worst enemy. Stay positive

@queenatom yes I feel a lot better now we’ve talked about it. Ooh exciting, will be great if it is! Yeah I keep trying to work out if mine will change, so far my cycle seems to be around 27 days but my period tracker doesn’t change it until you’ve had more than 3 cycles and I think I’m in my 3rd now, so keep having to deduct a day each month! Would be so lovely if all of us Sept/Oct TTC-ers fall around the same time, very unlikely but it could happen! 🤞🏼

I am not even close to a 'normal' BMI and I'm trying not to stress too much about it. I've spent pretty much my entire adult life trying to lose weight with varying degrees of success at different points and I've found it can be disastrous for my mental health if I get too fixated on it. Realistically unless it takes us a very long time to conceive, I'm going to be overweight when it happens, so I'm just focusing on getting plenty of exercise, cutting down on booze and trying to be mindful around snacking and what I'm eating.

@Lollipop87 good news on the conversation - I think it really helps to have a firm date in mind as the starting point. Ours is my husband's birthday in late September - all being well we are staying in the hotel we were supposed to be in for our first anniversary. If my predicted ovulation tracker is correct (which - probably not, given how recently I'm off contraception!) it should also be my fertile week...

@Nate1 yeah it’s like he suddenly got excited, I think maybe because he had an exam to do for work he could only really focus on that (typical bloke!) but now he’s passed it he’s ready for the next thing 😊

My BMI is right on 25, I’m at the max weight I should be for my height before going into overweight. I lost weight at the start of lockdown but then got fed up and started eating more unhealthily and drinking more alcohol (really need to curb that habit once my birthday is out of the way!) So I’ve got maybe 10lbs to lose, which I’m confident I can do before TTC.

@Lollipop87 exciting!! Sounds perfect for ttc your baby :):) And how amazing that your OH is invested (hope that’s the correct term) and talks about it :)

@butterfly5291 Yeah I can relate .. being close to normal weight makes it hard on either side buuuut I can cheer you on :) And we can always ignore all the advice and just find comfort in being close to normal :D

@wrensandrobins that’s fantastic, I’m so amazed you’ve been able to do that during lockdown when eating more out of boredom is what most people have been doing! Go you!! 💪🏼

Morning ladies 😊

@Nate1 yes I think exercise can only be a good thing, it’s not like any of us are professional athletes (or are we..?! 😂) Maybe just take the opportunity to eat more of the good fats and carbs at the same time! And yes I know what you mean, I feel like reading up and getting prepared is a nice thing to focus on rather than impatiently waiting with nothing else to think about.

@butterfly5291 thanks! Well I’m not sure when I ovulate but according to my period tracker app my first fertile day would fall the day before our anniversary, so the perfect opportunity for lots of anniversary BD’ing 🙈 I told him last night that’s what people vamp it and looked at me in horror and said “well we’re not going to call it that” 😂 It was lovely actually, he suddenly seemed really interested in the whole science of it all (I forget he did biology at uni) - he suddenly started talking about follicle stimulating hormone, progesterone etc. and I was like wow, you probably know more than me!

It is lovely having others to talk to who are in the same boat, thanks ladies ❤️

My Bmi is 31! I have lost 24 pounds during lockdown and I have just 5lb to go until I'm not obese! That's giving me a bit of focus and also helping stop me being tempted to TTC earlier! I am so excited about getting to be 'overweight' 🤣 I want to get my bmi as close to healthy as possible before December.