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Conception

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Original poster

Are others still delaying TTC because of covid?

36 replies

Lagirl20 · 25/06/2020 14:51

Hello,
We were due to start TTC this month. We decided to put it on hold when the pandemic started (general worries about being pregnant right now, contracting the virus, receiving less care, and I am asthmatic). Initially we thought we might be able to TTC in September, but we are worried about a second wave and are considering waiting until January 2021. I am 31.

I am wondering what others are doing? I'd like there to be no judgement either way on this thread please! It's a personal decision for sure but I'm curious how others feel. A big second winter wave is our main worry - we know covid will likely be around in some shape or form for a long time to come potentially.

I am tempted to TTC anyway, as I know it could take a while and we might be wasting precious months of trying. It's so difficult to know what to do!

OP posts:
newphoneswhodis · 25/06/2020 16:19

I would try now, and am. You never know what's around the corner. Or how long it will take. It took me over 18months to conceive my first.

Original poster
Lagirl20 · 25/06/2020 16:11

@Greyhoundgirly I know what you mean. I've been in my job for aaaaaaaaaages so I wouldn't feel too bad about it ;)

But the guidance is SO unclear. And I wouldn't want to add stress to a pregnancy - like if rates of covid increased but lockdown took a while longer to kick in, and I had to go to work and was stressing.

OP posts:
Greyhoundgirly · 25/06/2020 16:09

@JoeExoticsTiger not pathetic at all! I feel like I'm seeing pregnant women everywhere. Have had to 'snooze' a few people on social media because I was getting a bit upset. If I see an announcement I just send very genuine warm wishes and then hide them for my own mental wellbeing! X

Original poster
Lagirl20 · 25/06/2020 16:09

@JoeExoticsTiger

I was meant to be starting TTC for number 1 right now, as we were meant to be getting married this month. Wedding has been postponed and both our jobs are looking iffy (I’m furloughed) so not a good time financially. We’re going to look to try after our new wedding date (this time next year). Totally gutted is an understatement, as I’m feeling incredibly broody and have been for a while. I’m only 28, but have a family history of gynae issues and infertility, plus I have PCOS so not predicting an easy ride - plus a number of people I know have just announced pregnancies. Feels like salt in the wound I actually cried today at the latest pregnancy announcement.. (pathetic I know!).
Don't feel bad for crying! Three of my friends are had babies within weeks of each other in April and May and I'm finding it very difficult to deal with! Jealousy and disappointment are difficult emotions to cope with. Just have to hold on to the belief that our time will come too! X
OP posts:
Greyhoundgirly · 25/06/2020 16:07

I'm concerned about a second wave too, and I have not been long in my job (which is currently a wfh job but I don't know how long that will continue to be the case). I'm so new I feel like it'd be a bit cheeky to say, I'm not coming into the office, I'm pregnant! I actually don't totally understand what the guidance is for pregnant women if I'm honest. I know that pregnant women with underlying health conditions will be in a high risk group but whether or not otherwise-healthy pregnant women are? It's nice to share these thoughts with other people, I don't have anyone irl to talk to about it (or maybe I'm just scared they'll tell me not to so I don't ask...!) x

JoeExoticsTiger · 25/06/2020 16:02

I was meant to be starting TTC for number 1 right now, as we were meant to be getting married this month. Wedding has been postponed and both our jobs are looking iffy (I’m furloughed) so not a good time financially. We’re going to look to try after our new wedding date (this time next year). Totally gutted is an understatement, as I’m feeling incredibly broody and have been for a while. I’m only 28, but have a family history of gynae issues and infertility, plus I have PCOS so not predicting an easy ride - plus a number of people I know have just announced pregnancies. Feels like salt in the wound I actually cried today at the latest pregnancy announcement.. (pathetic I know!).

Original poster
Lagirl20 · 25/06/2020 15:58

@Greyhoundgirly

Hi *@Lagirl20*, I've been in the same boat as you (in fact I started a thread on this a week or 2 ago!). I had searched for covid+conception threads on mum'snet and there are a few about. What's interesting is the difference between people's discussions in the early days of the outbreak (march/April) vs now where some people were initially quite hostile towards people continuing to try for a baby, whereas now I think the mood has changed a bit. DH and I had decided to postpone ttc due to covid related reasons but I think I may put aside my worries and start ttc again. But that said, I flip back and forward in my mind. Some days I'm like what the hell let's do it! Other days I'm thinking about 2nd waves, whether I'll have to hibernate for 9 months if I did conceive (?) and I get really upset. One lady in another thread called these brain circles, I think that's a great expression for it! We are in a bit of a better position now in the sense that we have a better understanding of the effects of covid on pregnant women but it's a difficult decision. The thought I keep trying to remind myself of is that we are likely to be living with covid for a long long time so it's maybe a question of how long are you prepared to put it off? Xx
Thanks for your reply! It is very difficult, isn't it. Covid will definitely be around for a long time and I am not willing to put it off any longer than 6 months. I'm just wary of a winter second wave, that's my main concern right now.

With all the restrictions lifting, for now at least, are pregnant women still being advised to self isolate? I am working from home and could continue to do so, so that's less of a concern for me. I too flip-flop between being so wary, this virus is so new and there will be a second winter wave, to OH FFS just get on with it!

OP posts:
Greyhoundgirly · 25/06/2020 15:56

Let us know how you get on @LuckyFlash!! X

Original poster
Lagirl20 · 25/06/2020 15:55

@LuckyFlash

We put it off in March and April but started in June. We have been discussing it since Sept 2019. At that time I got a new job so wanted to wait until I at least passed my probation. Then once I passed it DH’s mum got ill. Then we put it off because of COVID. So I feel like we’ve been waiting absolutely ages. I’m on furlough and am by far the main earner so I wouldn’t say this is the perfect time. Also I am not great with hospitals/needles so I know I will struggle with solo tests. However, I just don’t think there will be a perfect time given COVID is likely to be around for a long time to come so we’re throwing caution to the wind. I’m just turned 32 so the longer we leave it the harder it will get. I’m not 7dpo so if it’s happened it’s happened!
Interesting to know, thank you! I agree, covid will be around for a long time to come. And no time is perfect - there will always be something to potentially delay for. Fingers crossed for you! :)
OP posts:
Greyhoundgirly · 25/06/2020 15:55

Hi @Lagirl20, I've been in the same boat as you (in fact I started a thread on this a week or 2 ago!). I had searched for covid+conception threads on mum'snet and there are a few about. What's interesting is the difference between people's discussions in the early days of the outbreak (march/April) vs now where some people were initially quite hostile towards people continuing to try for a baby, whereas now I think the mood has changed a bit. DH and I had decided to postpone ttc due to covid related reasons but I think I may put aside my worries and start ttc again. But that said, I flip back and forward in my mind. Some days I'm like what the hell let's do it! Other days I'm thinking about 2nd waves, whether I'll have to hibernate for 9 months if I did conceive (?) and I get really upset. One lady in another thread called these brain circles, I think that's a great expression for it! We are in a bit of a better position now in the sense that we have a better understanding of the effects of covid on pregnant women but it's a difficult decision. The thought I keep trying to remind myself of is that we are likely to be living with covid for a long long time so it's maybe a question of how long are you prepared to put it off? Xx

LuckyFlash · 25/06/2020 14:57

We put it off in March and April but started in June. We have been discussing it since Sept 2019. At that time I got a new job so wanted to wait until I at least passed my probation. Then once I passed it DH’s mum got ill. Then we put it off because of COVID. So I feel like we’ve been waiting absolutely ages. I’m on furlough and am by far the main earner so I wouldn’t say this is the perfect time. Also I am not great with hospitals/needles so I know I will struggle with solo tests. However, I just don’t think there will be a perfect time given COVID is likely to be around for a long time to come so we’re throwing caution to the wind. I’m just turned 32 so the longer we leave it the harder it will get. I’m not 7dpo so if it’s happened it’s happened!