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Advice for Women That Have Come off the Pill - Share your Experience :)

971 replies

MintGreenLife · 16/06/2020 09:51

Hi all,

I came off the pill two months ago, and after having a completely haywire 2nd post-pill cycle, I've been doing a lot of research to try and understand what's going on.

I thought it would be nice to share my research and what I believe is happening to me, in hope it might help others. I also thought you might like to share your experience and how you found/are finding coming off the pill, as being able to read that other people experience similar can be really comforting. So here's me...

I'm 31 and TTC DC1.
I came off the pill early April, had my withdrawal bleed a few days later, then first natural AF came 30 days later, so a 30 day cycle. First AF was very light and started and finished with brown spotting. Only lasted 4 days.

I'm now in cycle2 currently on CD37. I didn't ovulate until CD33! The day after ovulation, my boobs and nipples were agony. I'm now 3DPO and the pain is worse.

I recalled this pain the last cycle too, which I wasn't tracking. I assumed it was a sign AF was coming, as it arrived 5 days later. But from this cycle I now know it's actually a sign I've ovulated, so this would mean an extremely short luteal phase on that first cycle.

My research has included reading 'Taking Charge of your Fertility'.
I also found this article extremely helpful in understanding what goes on in your body when you stop the pill, as well as learning things you can do to take charge of your cycle again: avivaromm.com/post-pill-reset/

My sore boobs and possible short luteal phase points to an oestrogen dominance, which causes low progesterone.

This sums up why this happens:

'While not a symptom in itself, nutritional deficiencies can cause a host of symptoms – including hormonal imbalances. They are also a problem for women who come off the pill hoping to get pregnant right away because low nutrient status has been associated with fertility problems, and low nutrients in mom can also mean low nutrients in baby. The pill has been associated with robbing a number of nutrients including B vitamins and magnesium.

Hormonal birth control pills can deplete the body’s stores of certain nutrients, including vitamins B2, B6, and B12; vitamins C and E; magnesium, selenium, zinc, and folate. Vitamin D levels may also drop after coming off the pill.'

Understanding what is going on with my body right now has made me feel so much better. If I were to have a normal luteal phase this cycle, I'd be on track to have a 48 day cycle! The sore boobs tell me I'm probably going to have a short luteal phase though.

I've also learnt how hormones control the whole cycle. With oestrogen being the important hormone during the first half. It builds up and when it reaches a certain threshold it triggers the LH surge. Once you've ovulated, then progesterone kicks in. This cycle I had three LH surges in total spaced 12 days apart until I finally ovulated. Oestrogen and Progesterone have to be perfectly balanced, and so I think the three LH surges could indicate that my oestrogen kept building up over and over until my body finally managed to ovulate, causing an oestrogen dominance. I finally confirmed ovulation after three high temps.

As of a few days ago, I'm following some of the steps in the article I linked, by taking a prenatal multivitamin to replace depleted nutrients. I already take probiotics, vitamin D and folic acid, so will continue with those and will add in vitamin C too. I've cut out low fat dairy instead choosing full fat, and am trying to focus on eating at least 2 pieces of fruit a day and extra veg with my lunch and dinner. I may also look into including a b6 supplement for my luteal phase next cycle if it does turn out to be short again this cycle, as this helps with progesterone and during the luteal phase progesterone spikes to dry up cervical fluid, change the cervix position, stop anymore eggs from being released and build up the lining, so is really crucial.

Hopefully this will help someone :) would love to hear how others are finding coming off the pill x

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Flowerkm · 28/07/2020 13:10

@MintGreenLife Haha, I’m so with you about the ‘going with the flow’ I like to be in control of things and I love a ‘to do list’ I’ve had my OH laugh at my ‘to do lists’ before as I write the most obvious things on there. DTD often is all you can do and I think a call to the GP would be a good idea and see what they say, it can’t hurt to get advice and you might have a really good GP who might run some tests which will put your mind at ease.
I’m good today thank you, I have to admit though, I feel really emotional today, I was painting my nails and it went wrong and I honestly nearly cried…on the pill I never had that as I guess I had fake hormones rather than the real PMS. Just felt really worked up for some reason and things are getting to me and that's the only thing i can put it down to is AF is coming? Or I'm just really ratty today...
Aww, bless you, it hasn’t, don’t worry, and I know if I do have long cycles I have lots of support here and plenty of advice to help us all through it. So far so good but I really just want AF over the weekend and to see how that goes whether its light/heavy and then start a new cycle and see if I ovulate around CD13 again xx

MintGreenLife · 28/07/2020 10:21

@lawandgin thanks, I started out so optimistic ha. I've surprised myself in that I'm not feeling entirely deflated or too worried, although it probably seems like I'm worrying a lot! This is certainly my focus at the moment, but I'm still holding out hope that it will sort itself out in the next month or two and that it might just fit in with our postponed wedding...probably wishful thinking ha.

I know, to be honest I think it's awful that it's not explained that you could essentially end up 'infertile' for up to a year after coming off the pill. I even made an appointment to discus it and was told it wouldn't be an issue and I could start ovulating right after stopping, yet here I am almost 4 months later!

Hopefully now you've had AF you will be back on track :) ahh that is unique, but everyone's path to parenthood is different. Do you have any guidelines from the IVF clinic in terms of getting your body ready? I'm sure you've probably already looked into all this, but I would highly recommend 'It Starts With the Egg.' It focuses on how to improve egg quality and looks at things you can do to improve your chances with IVF. I've even implemented some of the advice as figured improving my egg quality can surely only help with my cycles x

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lawandgin · 28/07/2020 10:08

Hi and thanks for the welcome!

@Flowerkm I did have pain, but it seemed very random throughout my cycle so I'm not reading too much into it! I did have some EWCM but again, not a lot and random timing! I'm just writing that cycle off and hoping things will improve from now on...

@MintGreenLife I've been reading your ups and downs and I really feel for you. It's so frustrating isn't it - especially as women aren't warned about the potential long term effects... well our TTC story is an odd one to say the least! DH is a lot older than me (32 and 53) and previously married. He had a vasectomy as his previous partner didn't want children. I made it very clear when we met 12 years ago that I do want children and about 3 years later he had a reversal. He had a SA a few months later which showed no sperm. Advised to have a repeat SA but for various reasons we didn't get round to it. I've not been sure about TTC for a couple of years, but this year I'm sure someone just flipped a switch inside me and BAM! I'm ready to go! So we know we will have to have IVF, but I want my body to be in the right place to hopefully avoid any other complicating factors (especially as I am hoping to use ABC's mild IVF for cost and preferring to use low dose stimms...) So yeah - not straightforward!

MintGreenLife · 28/07/2020 09:51

@Juno231 message above for you. Thought I would attach my chart also. Today's is still above the coverline, but I think that also with the two dips doesn't look hopeful, but you never know ☺️

Advice for Women That Have Come off the Pill - Share your Experience :)
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MintGreenLife · 28/07/2020 09:49

@lawandgin hey :) your experience sounds somewhat similar to mine. I stopped the pill in April and my first cycle was actually 30 days, and second 37 days, however I think I'm possibly not ovulating since stopping either. From what I've read a very light period could be an anovulatory cycle, and mine was like yours - light and more brown than red. I thought things had gone back to normal for me with my first cycle, but after tracking my second cycle like you I had three LH surges. First two were high and my final one was a positive, but then AF came 4/5 days later, so not entirely sure as to whether I ovulated and had an extremely short luteal phase, or didn't ovulate. Now I'm on CD42 and haven't had any positive OPKs, maybe one surge but my levels seemed to get higher and higher for about 2 weeks before I got an almost positive, which doesn't seem good. I thought I might have ovulated and would now be 6DPO as I has some high temps, but now they seem to be dropping back off again. Abolustely no clue what's going on! Have you started TTC already? Or waiting for your cycles to get back to normal? xx

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MintGreenLife · 28/07/2020 09:45

@Flowerkm thanks :) It's so hard not to feel like it will never sort itself out. I think I'll try to go with the flow a bit more and just keep DTD every other day up until our wedding and on our honeymoon, but then 'going with the flow' doesn't come all that naturally to me ha. Think if it's not sorted itself out by then I will call the GP as it'll be almost six months off the pill. How are you today? Hope me stressing isn't making you worry about your cycles or anything! It sounds like you've had a much more positive start and that you did actually ovulate really soon after stopping :) xx

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MintGreenLife · 28/07/2020 09:42

@Juno231 you could be right, maybe for whatever reason I'm just experiencing lower temps after my initial rise. A lot of things don't add up though, like still having EWCM, but then also I know I'm not in my fertile week or anything because my cervix is low and hard. It's so funny, you learn absolutely everything you can to try and understand what your body is doing, and even then you still can't make sense of it, I don't have a clue what's going on right now! Sorry to hear your temp hasn't gone up as expected, has your app pinpointed your ovulation day yet? I guess as with me a rise is a rise, so maybe I should stop fussing so much. I think I don't want to get my hopes up in case in a day or two it's obvious I didn't ovulate after all, but then my temp went from my average of 36.3 to 36.55, 36.6 and 36.7. So confusing! x

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MintGreenLife · 28/07/2020 09:36

@TheDaydreamBelievers oh god it's so painful isn't it! Because I usually get up once or twice in the night I set an alarm for 5.30 to take my temp, but if I wake up earlier, like last night was 4am, then I take it then before I get up to pee or settle the dog etc. Wanting to see a high temp so badly and getting a low one isn't great in the middle of the night! I then plot it on my app and stare at the chart feeling frustrated and disappointed. Probably not ideal mid-sleep! Everything since I came off the pill just feels like endless ups and downs... mostly downs. I thought I was back on track with my first 30 day cycle, yet here I am now CD42 and absolutely no clue what on earth is going on. Really hope things pick up for both of us soon x

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Flowerkm · 28/07/2020 09:34

Morning @MintGreenLife don’t apologise for the rant! Sorry to hear you’re feeling frustrated but totally understand you ☹ Try not to think of next cycle as this cycle goes to show they’re all different so maybe you’ll have a clearer cycle next one.

Hey @lawandgin join right in 😃 Glad AF showed up for you, I’m due my first AF on Sunday and like you said I've never wanted it so much. Really hope it’s on time.
You never know you may have missed it? Did you get any other signs like pain or EWCM? I had a high reading on CD12 evening and a peak CD13 morning but by the evening it had gone back to high so it’s so easy to miss if your body peaks quickly, mine did not keep me waiting with the highs, happened so quick so you never know. Keep us posted how your next cycle goes xx

TheDaydreamBelievers · 28/07/2020 09:26

@Juno231 - sorry I'm not sure what the cover line is? Is that the kind of rolling average? In which case mine seems higher than most.

Advice for Women That Have Come off the Pill - Share your Experience :)
Juno231 · 28/07/2020 09:20

@TheDaydreamBelievers 36.4 still sounds like it's above the cover line though and if it's potentially 2-3 DPO it could be a fallback rise?

@MintGreenLife I hear your frustration - I still think you may have ovulated though! Looking forward to see the temp tomorrow for some more reassurance.

I'm getting frustrated with my BBTs as well if it helps :) In theory I'm 2 DPO but my temps are pretty low, albeit still higher than pre-ovulation. Could just be a slow rise in progesterone, could be that I haven't actually ovulated. Just like you @mintgreenlife I'm hoping for a stronger rise tomorrow. For reference - last cycle my temp shot up from 36.2 to 36.6 the day after OD, this time round it's hovering just above 36.4...

TheDaydreamBelievers · 28/07/2020 09:02

Hey @MintGreenLife - I'm at the same point as you. A promising 2 day temp rise with OPKs that were getting there, then today 36.4 Hmm. Sighhh. Will this cycle ever return? Who knows

lawandgin · 28/07/2020 08:59

Hi all - hope you don't mind me joining! I'm a serial lurker but wanted to share my experience so far...
I took my last pill on 30 May and had a 5 day withdrawal bleed from 4 June. Then.....NOTHING! I did OPKs virtually every day, sometimes twice. I saw 'highs' on two consecutive days but never a peak. I assume I didn't ovulate, but I'm not temping at the moment.

I was starting to get so frustrated, I've never wished for AF before in my life, but AF finally started on sunday night, CD 53! Seems much lighter and brown, but we'll see what happens for the rest of this cycle...

MintGreenLife · 28/07/2020 08:39

Morning @Juno231 @Flowerkm had to pop on as feeling very frustrated this morn. My temp was 36.41, which is slightly higher then average for me and still above the coverline on FF and just on the coverline on Premom. Not what I expected though. I think with the two dips and today's slightly above average temp I guess I didn't ovulate. We didn't DTD for about 4 days until last night as thought I had ovulated, but I was getting lots of EWCM some of those days so worried we missed an opportunity now, however I guess if I had ovulated during that time I would have seen it on my temps by now.

Am CD42 I think so feeling pretty crap 😕 Can't get my head around how my first two cycles were so much shorter, although propobably anovulatory. Can't see how I will ovulate this cycle - at this point I think I've had 4/5 separate occasions of EWCM so my body is reallly trying, no idea why it's not quite managing. Just feel pretty deflated as when will this cycle end, and if this one has been so rubbish how will the next one be any better. Sorry, massive rant this morn! Xx

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MintGreenLife · 27/07/2020 16:16

Thanks @crabette :) I'm fine really, it's just a little disappointing when you're expecting a high temp and then it's low! Can you remind me if you've had a cycle off the pill already? if you've guessed your cycle length then your app would assume ovulation would happen 14 days before the end of your cycle.

@Flowerkm Kind of want to go to sleep and it be tomorrow now to see what my temp is doing! Must learn not to put too much emphasis on these things as I'm just setting myself up for disappointment really. Aww well at leas you're trying these things and listening to your body. It's good to just go with the flow and just see what's possible, think it's the right call to head home rather than just pushing on unnecessarily! xx

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Flowerkm · 27/07/2020 16:04

@MintGreenLife Exactly, glad you’re feeling better. See what tomorrow brings 😊 I’m all ok today thank you, been feeling a little off with headaches etc but I think my body is just adjusting to not being on the pill so just taking it easy. I tried a run today on my lunch and my body wasn’t having any of it so came back home after 20 mins lol probably gearing up to AF over the weekend or it’s going to come before then.

@crabette you’re welcome. I ovulated on CD13 this month and it’s my first off the pill and after looking on here that is quite early, I was really expecting a later ovulation. I’ve just read your other messages and it I think it’s just assuming those dates as it probably doesn’t have enough information in. How do you feel about testing daily just to get an idea while your cycles are still settling down?

crabette · 27/07/2020 14:23

@juno yeah it's all made up at the moment - I've only had withdrawal bleed and then one light period, so they're assuming a 31 day cycle because of the dates involved there? Where I genuinely have no idea what my cycle is doing.

Juno231 · 27/07/2020 14:16

@crabette how long have your cycles been? My guess would be that if eg 33 days long then natural cycles would just lop off 14 days and assume you've previously ovulated on CD19 and that's what they're basing the current estimate on. It's pure guesswork though if they don't have actual previous ovulation data to base it on.

crabette · 27/07/2020 14:06

@Flowerkm amazing! Thank you!!

I've just done my first LH test... negative. Today is CD12, and Natural Cycles is telling me to test on CD12, CD14, CD16, CD17, and CD18, as my predicted ovulation is CD19? I thought it would have been earlier than this. I haven't put any temperatures in yet though, starting that tomorrow - only my last 'period' dates.

Hope you're ok @MintGreenLife

MintGreenLife · 27/07/2020 13:41

@Flowerkm I'm feeling OK now and am hopeful it's a dip that @Juno231 mentioned. Think initially I felt a bit gutted as wasn't what I was expecting, but there's every chance it'll go back up again tomorrow, here's hoping anyway! How are you today? Xx

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Flowerkm · 27/07/2020 13:21

@MintGreenLife Oh I’m sorry to hear that, totally ok to feel rubbish, is there anything you can do to try and pick yourself up a little bit? Keep testing until AF as you never know you can still get that rise tomorrow 😊

@crabette Ooh I’ve not heard of that one, but sounds good how that works. Femometer doesn’t have colours on days it just says low ferility or high fertility. I’ve just had a look and I used this www.mumsnet.com/info/acronyms (hope that works) xx

crabette · 27/07/2020 11:35

@TheDaydreamBelievers I'm so sorry you're going through that with limited help from gynaecology - it's crazy they bounce things til 6 months. Hopefully you get some more good signs coming out of today's developments.

It's really weird adjusting from a 15 year mindset of 'must not get pregnant, one missed pill means I'm probably pregnant' to... actually, this might take a bit of work to achieve, and all your efforts to not get pregnant all those years now have side effects that we didn't really tell you about. Wish there was a bit more honesty / clarity.

TheDaydreamBelievers · 27/07/2020 11:24

Yeap @crabette - none at all!

The (abbreviated) history of me post pill:

Came off pill in March. Had the withdrawal bleed then ... nadda! GP did bloods -all hormones and androgens fine except prolactin a bit high (at pregnancy levels). They've referred to gynaecology but said it may get bounced as it hasn't been 6 months.

crabette · 27/07/2020 11:01

@MintGreenLife It's all just so hard to predict! Impossible to know when you'd show, and also how you'd feel? I initially said I'd be fine being pregnant on the day, but then spoke to a friend who said she wanted to hibernate with nausea at 8 weeks pregnant and couldn't think of anything worse than that getting married at that stage lol. But then other folk are fine and don't show at all til after 3 months! It's just an added complication with trying to second guess what your body is going to do. I want a baby badly enough that I'd deal with the nausea - I just also would feel awful not being able to wear my dress! And I'm similar to you in that I think hopefully as it's a first baby, I wouldn't show til around 12 weeks. So I'm being careful for the next couple of weeks (though we're useless with barrier contraceptives, so it's a bit of a farce!) and then I think I'll relax into properly TTC. I just don't want to be taking the pill any longer without knowing how it's affecting me. Just wish I knew if it was going to be super easy to conceive and I should be trying to prevent it still, or if it's going to be an uphill battle and I should be going for it right now. Uncertainty is the killer! You still have a good few months to conceive before you need to think about your September date in terms of whether or not you want to put a short pause on things - and hopefully it works itself out before then!!

@TheDaydreamBelievers I can't believe your CD131?! Have you not had a period at all since stopping? I had short withdrawal and then a very short, light (albeit very crampy) period - so I'm not sure if it really signified anything happening or not, or it was just an illusion! Your temperature looks really promising - let us know the OPK?! Everything crossed for you x

MintGreenLife · 27/07/2020 10:02

@Juno231 ah interesting! This is my first cycle using FF. I just used Premom last cycle and wanted something else to compare and see if things looked different. Well for me looking at it my temps are clearly higher, but then I've had a few dips. Really hoping AF doesn't show and it goes back up tomorrow!

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