Penguin huddle 🐧🐧🐧 TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 35 - time for some sticky BFP's

Thanks @Mumlili9 💗

@AliceinBunnyland I'm sorry about the bfn. They sting don't they. You never know you might not be out yet, fx xx

@KerryW87 Thank you 💗 Did you manage to get in touch with your bereavement midwife? I had two kind of because one was based in the city I gave birth and one on the city I live in and one was lovely and one was no use at all and couldn't wait to stop calling me! x

@AliceinBunnyland Ah, sorry to hear that. It's always so disappointing :( Although, as they say...you're not out until you're out so I'll keep my fingers crossed for you! 🤞❤️ x

I tested today with a First Response Rapid Result (I accidentally bought these instead of FRERs) and got a BFN.

I'm 12 DPO and AF is due tomorrow so I think I am probably out even though these tests might not be as sensitive as FRERs... sigh

That's disappointing your boss isn't supportive. It's not like you're pulling a sickie because you drank too much at the weekend. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you x

@Kiki275 thanks, the test is very uncomfortable but I bet no where near as uncomfortable as having covid would be. Fx for Thursday and praying I get this job. I've got to get out of the one I'm in. My boss has not been very supportive during my last 3 mc's . I can see her point having to go on the sick every 6 months does cause inconvenience to her and my colleagues.

@Mumlili9 not nice having to have the test but the very best of luck for your interview x

Well ladies that's my Corona test done. Had to do it before my interview for a new possible job at a mental health hospital

@Hlump1980 eat whatever you like if it helps even just a little bit. That's an awfully long time to be waiting,

@KerryW87 my bereavement team were brilliant. As soon as you leave the hospital, you seem to fall through many cracks. No postnatal GP or MW checks etc. The bereavement team did all the final things for me as soon as I asked. Ie. I needed a follow up consultant meeting which they set in motion. This then in turn got a smear request authorised and they reassured me so much. My hospital offer a photography service for stillborn babies so the bereavement team tracked these photos down for me. Even now, 4 months later, I could ring them and feel confident they'll help. I do realise from being on other threads that this seems to be a lucky draw depending on your location & trust.x

@Hlump1980 I wonder if I'd be allowed to phone since I'm no longer under antenatal care. The bereavement midwives were so lovely whilst I was in the labour ward so maybe they'd be able to quickly answer the question.

I feel guilty for how I feel but both my partner and I feel such a need to try again so I do hope this is normal and my cycles will return to normal soon 🤞 x

@KerryW87
What about the Early Pregnancy Unit at your hospital. They might be able to help you ?

@Hlump1980 Aww not at all, I've really found comfort in this group and you're all so kind.

So sorry to hear about what you're going through :( Absolutely, have whatever you bloody well want at a time like this! ❤️

@Kiki275 Thanks so much, ah I wonder if this might be something similar then. I'm not sure, I didn't know if I'd still be under their care, so to speak? My partner did suggest phoning the bereavement team but wasn't sure that was allowed once you'd left hospital etc. Maybe I'll phone - we're both so anxious to be able to try again so would be nice to know what to expect re. recovery times. Thanks ❤️ Hope you're well!

It seems like we are having a crappy time at the moment . Sending everyone that needs it a big hug. Sorry I can’t be any help about the bleeding . I am finally going through my miscarriage after waiting 3 weeks from the scan. Just eating crappy food because why an earth not ! X

@KerryW87 after my boys, I had 6 weeks of lochia, however it did stop a couple of times for a day or two. It was a bit later on for me, so after 4 weeks I thought Yay! it's stopped and then I started what I thought would be my period, only for that to stop & start again. My periods have been completely different in flow & length since then to pre-twins but they are happening. Just keep a note of anything and if you have any concerns, can you speak to your bereavement midwife or GP?x

Hi, wondering if anyone can help?

I gave birth to my wee boy 8 days ago, at 18 weeks. I lost a litre of blood during labour (they think possible placental abruption) but a couple of days after labour, the bleeding had entirely stopped which was good.

Two days ago, bleeding started again but seems more consistent with what a period would be like. However, I'm thinking that isn't possible as there would be no womb lining left and it's only been a week since giving birth?

I've been really anxious to know that I still "work" and wanted to see when my cycles would resume normally, and so this bleeding is confusing me.

Can anyone who had a loss and had to labour remember their situation re. bleeding? Can't find any info on it online to see if it's quite normal or a bit odd.

Thanks so much, hope you're all doing well ❤️ xx

@Mumlili9 I'm sorry you've been here for so long. Thank you for your kind offer 🥰 x

@Mumlili9 yes I remember you. Saw your username yesterday when I posted and thought it was you with a NC. I'll PM you as got 1 book still available. So sorry about the ectopic and that you're still here. That must have been so scary.

@VenusStarr I was having technical issues but basically tested today and got a BFN at 10DPO. I was a bit hopeful as I've had some (tmi) constipation and sore boobs but then I kid myself so often... It can be disheartening so I felt a bit shit for about half an hour then forced myself to be positive and actually got up in a much better mood. I hope you're ok. It's good you have IVF on the horizon.
Hope you're ok @Mumlili9 and everyone else x

@venusstarr yeah very strange cycle. A temp spike before a peak opk then funky temps all two and a stupid light AF. Not sure what to make of it all. I'm about really to give up 😢. I just can't trust my body, bbt or opks any more.

@InDreamland hello lovely nice to hear from you. What a wonderful idea. If you still have then I'm up for a read. I've been on this support group forever and any help is welcomed, you may remember me as lilimum7 or 8 . Its been I hard struggle since November 2019 with more losses and an exploding ectopic with tube removal. But alas I'm still here.
@venusstarr yeah I'm cd 5 now , it was a pathetic period after all lasted just 36 hours of very light bleeding and 3 days of brown spotting. I think we might be in the same boat emotionally. I'm really starting to lose hope. Also not eligible for IVF or IUI on NHS due to Age. I can't afford private so I'll keep struggling on. Great news about the speed of your treatment and truly hoping this is your happy ending in sight.
@AliceinBunnyland sorry I went quiet licking my wounds. I totally understand wear you are in terms of disappointment every cycle, it's just do bloody unfair.

@Kiki275 @KerryW87 welcome and so very sorry for your losses. Hope you gain the support you need. As a very long standing member of this huddle please feel free to pm me if you like I'm always around for a chat or rant which ever is most appropriate. Goodness knows I'm not going anywhere anytime soon x

Hi everyone, I didn't see your message earlier @AliceinBunnyland but hope everything is OK as they're gone now? ❤️ I think booking in for the fertility tests is a good idea, I definitely feel better when I'm doing things, rather than just ttc on our own and hoping.

@Kiki275 how are you?

@Mumlili9 how are you getting on, did af arrive, you said your luteal phase was long this cycle.

My temps are still high, but I stopped the cyclogest on Friday as had a bfn and have been cramping today and started spotting at 14dpo. I'm feeling OK, surprisingly. I think deep down I knew, so all my emotions came out earlier in the week.

I can't remember if I updated, but I chased the fertility clinic this week and things hopefully will be moving forward - I'm being prioritised due to my age... I had a message to say that I'll be booked in for my baseline scan and consultation on my next cycle!! And there's no waiting list, so due to my short cycles I'll be hopefully starting towards the end of August. Crazy. So, I'm seeing this af as a means to an end. I'm not sure we'll ttc this cycle, but not prevent, but then I don't want to miss taking the progesterone in case I am pregnant... But I feel like I could do with a break from it and focus on the ivf. I've got a few days to decide anyway. Sorry, rambling now, but feeling happy that we are able to try ivf with our nhs funding. Hoping it brings us our rainbow 🌈 xx

@AliceinBunnyland that's a positive step and will give something to focus on, I hope they have something that will help you.
I'm okay, just questioning whether my DH actually wants another DC or whether he's going along with it to keep me happy. He's a farmer so he doesn't have much input/time for our toddler as it is and there are increasingly more times when I'm struggling to cope. Our house is about to be totally refurbished too, so we'll be moving into a static at some point. Fun times!

Thanks @Kiki275 💗 I'm actually 10 DPO 😩 Im a bit fed up. I lost my first baby at 40 weeks in Feb last year and then had the miscarriage in July. It's nearly a year that we've been TTC again and I worry it isn't happening. I think I'm going to book us in for fertility testing as at least I'm doing something. I hope you're ok xx