Ttc at 40 something!

Hello. Bad news from me, sadly. No heartbeat at 8 weeks. Sad but was expecting it. Planning a quick d&c as I don’t love the thought of waiting for things to happen....

I agree with you , it is a numbers game , it’s just exhausting though isn’t it ? I was so anxious during this pregnancy fearing another mmc , goodness knows how I’ll feel if pg again . I hope your scan is better news next week x

I am so sorry. It sucks. At our age I think it becomes a numbers game, we need to try and try and try and hope that we find one that is ok...

I expected it with the hcg not doubling right a couple of weeks ago but it’s still devastating. My egg quality is obviously not good and it’s likely chromosomal, probably last two were as well . Guess it’s an age thing 😞
Off to hospital alone today ( as don’t allow partners due to covid) to discuss options . The fertility clinic I’m at want an operation and testing of what they get out to know what happened for sure .
Not sure what to do next . I should probably give up with my own eggs . Thought about pgs testing but the reviews are so mixed .

Oh no! I am so so sorry. How are you?

Unfortunately, no heartbeat at 9 weeks , just had scan . Third mmc in a year

It is! I am feeling ok though, sort of prepared for it to go either way. And you? Any news from your end?

Wish they could put us in a coma til 12 weeks is past . The waiting is like torture eh x

Next week. Either Wednesday or Friday.

Yes that sounds about right . I know your dates aren’t incorrect because of ivf . Hopefully , it will catch up at next scan , when’s your next one? X

Yes. Am meant to be 7 weeks and measuring 6mm which is apparently 6+3?

The heartbeat is weak if it just started normally , I’m glad it started . I hope it gets stronger over the next few days 🤞 what does he mean it’s a bit small , he means the crl? X

Had my secondo scan. Weak heartbeat and a bit small so doctor not optimistic but hanging in there!

@Anxiousbuthopeful hope you’re ok? X

Yeah I know the costs and stats are hard to stomach but I still think it’s money I’d spend on a car / holidays etc and if it gave a baby , well that’s worth so So much more . I’m going to do ivf if this pregnancy fails but I’m also considering doner eggs as I think eggs are reason for constant mmc ( low amh ) is look at all factors and ask for the clinics honest opinion as chances may be lower or higher depending on your unique results . Also consider immune testing ( argc do this) as sometimes that or sticky blood can be reason for infertility or mc x

@Sunshinelove8 thank you I've been in touch with my clinic and they said overall after 3 rounds about a 35% live birth rate with pregnancy rate about 50% It's so hard to know what to do as it will cost us not far off £15k for those 3 rounds and the chances are not that high but it's still a relatively decent 1 in 3 chance.

Hi luciloos , I know it’s lowish in 40s but I think my clinic (argc) was about 30 percent which was one of higher success rates . Check around the clinics should have stats on websites or call them to check . I was going to do it whatever the stats as a chance is a chance I guess.
I think if you got to 7 weeks and it’s over a certain size ( can’t remember what this is but sure will be on google) also I think when hcg is over 10,000 heartbeat is expected . I’m sure there are exceptions but I’m a bit of a realist and so when I didn’t see one at 6 weeks 5 and no pole - I still hoped but knew it was not a good sign . You were only 6 weeks 2 though so anything can happen within the sixth week x

Thank you. Do you know whether there are many instances where there is no heartbeat (and no possibility of dating error - IVF!) and then it turns out ok? Or is it largely a foregone conclusion?

What's the chances of ivf success over say 3 rounds at 41 but with low amh so only 1-2 blasts max per cycle? I just don't know if it's worth the expense?

I’m leaving my next scan til 9 weeks for a similar reason , I’d rather wait longer and viability more certain . I think after my 6 week 5 scan where no heartbeat I waited a week and by that stage it was obvious what was happening x

Thank you! Will keep you all posted. Debating waiting until tomorrow to scan as I reckon the longer I wait the more definite tue answer. But at the same time I just want to know.

Hi awbaby , I’m with a fertility clinic ( was about to start ivf when fell pg) so they monitored every two days via blood tests . It’s supposed to double every 3 days minimum but mine ended up being like 8 days which is not good . Will just have to wait and see unfortunately.
Good luck today @Anxiousbuthopeful x

@sunshinelove8 how are you measuring your hcg levels? Fingers crossed everything is OK for you.
@anxiousbuthopeful I never had any symptoms with my first so don't worry. Good luck with your scan.

And you xxx

Dear @Sunshinelove8 - so stressful. I have booked another scan for tomorrow afternoon. Fingers crossed for you.