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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Fuck you TTC

483 replies

painintheholeSIL · 31/01/2020 07:45

Today should be day one of my period. No sign. We've been ttc dc2 since summer 2018. I don't have any tests in the house. I'm trying not to symptom spot, I haven't told anyone in real life that we're trying.
Our son is almost 4. I'm desperate to give him a sibling. I adore him. He's amazing.

But I am aching to have another baby. People keep asking when we're going to and we just laugh off the questions. They hurt. Every one of them hurts. I suppose I'm just looking for people who understand.

Every single thread I look at in relation to this ends up full of BFPs and I'm just not in the space where I can read those and not feel devastated.

So Fuck you to TTC.
Fuck you to months off slightly delayed periods
Fuck you to every fucker that asks me every time they see me if I have any news
Fuck you to the whole fucking lot of it.

Anyone care to add theirs?

OP posts:
Waiting2BAMummy · 15/05/2020 21:41

Thank you @Icouldstillbejoseph @painintheholeSIL you guys rock

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 15/05/2020 21:21

@Waiting2BAMummy what @Icouldstillbejoseph said with bells on!

OP posts:
Icouldstillbejoseph · 15/05/2020 19:18

@Waiting2BAMummy you have found your people here :)
Welcome Smile

Waiting2BAMummy · 15/05/2020 18:47

I think I actually love you ladies!! Please can I join?

Fuck you to the fact that I don’t have a partner so am using a known donor to go it alone
Fuck to to TTC for 19 months
Fuck you to getting a BFP after 17 months only to start bleeding 7 days later
Fuck you to having to keep those pregnancy tests and look at them everyday to remind myself I really did get a BFP
Fuck you to the fact that I stupidly bought loads of baby stuff before I started trying because I knew once I got pregnant I would need to save to support us during maternity leave
Fuck you that my flat is now full of baby stuff that I can’t use
Fuck you to those women that post the darkest lines on pregnancy tests asking for line eyes.... REALLY?! Fuck you and fuck your positive pregnancy test
Fuck you to not being able to talk to anyone in RL about this
Fuck you that my donor walked away after my chemical pregnancy so had to find a new one
Fuck you that I can’t try as much as women who have they goods’ on tap so have reduced odds each month
Fuck you to wanting to be pregnant before I turned 38 and now I’m 39
Fuck you to there being pregnant women everywhere.... seriously aren’t you supposed to be shielding??.... go home where I can’t see you!
Fuck you to trying to hold onto the belief this will ever happen
Fuck you to having given up caffeine and chocolate and I’m still not pregnant
Fuck you to soy isoflavones
Fuck you to being fed up and wanting to order pizza for dinner but being scared it will prevent me getting pregnant

So many more fuck you’d but I’ve made a start!

It’s so nice to be around people who don’t just paint a rosy picture of the TTC journey

Icouldstillbejoseph · 15/05/2020 14:17

Me too @PurpleDaisies Thanks part of the reason why I don't have FB anymore. I can't bear all that shite

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 15/05/2020 14:12

@PurpleDaisies Thanks I hate that shit too.

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 15/05/2020 14:02

Fuck you Facebook mum challenge. All my Facebook is full of photos of children. Sad

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 15/05/2020 13:53

@Icouldstillbejoseph you're probably right!!! I'm trying so hard to not let it take over my thoughts but it's impossible. On the bright side though DH has realised that it takes a lot more effort than he though to make a baby!

OP posts:
Icouldstillbejoseph · 15/05/2020 13:50

@PainintheholeSIL don't want to sound like a raging, bra-burning feminist but that's probably 'normal' defined by a man.

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 15/05/2020 13:48

@Icouldstillbejoseph yep, on day 36. I feel like my cycle is all over the place but apparently it's normal, whatever that is!

OP posts:
Icouldstillbejoseph · 15/05/2020 12:59

@PainintheholeSIL did AF finally arrive for you?

Icouldstillbejoseph · 15/05/2020 12:59

Thanks @PainintheholeSIL I think the joy was nice for a few days. I can go back to hating TTC now. I'm used to that!

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 15/05/2020 11:24

@Icouldstillbejoseph of course you are. I don't really know what to say to you except that I'm sorry. It's so shit. And to get a bfp and have it taken away. That's just awful.

OP posts:
Icouldstillbejoseph · 15/05/2020 09:35

I wonder if I am still welcome here as I got a BFP 5 days ago. After a year of TTC.

Anyway I'm here to say more fuck yous to it all as I'm sat here cramping, sulking and spotting.
I knew it was too good to be true. Part of me is just happy enough to have finally seen 2 fucking stupid lines. But I knew it wouldn't bloody last. Fucking stupid ttc. Fucking stupid hope. Fuck off.

Thank you - feel better now.

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 09/05/2020 14:41

Fuck you day 34. No sign of af.
Sore boobs all week. fuck them too. Gave in this morning and went to town at 8am to buy a pregnancy test. BFN. Fuck that too. I feel sick. My boobs are killing me, no sign of a period and the test clearly said not pregnant.
I give up.

OP posts:
Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 07/05/2020 23:53

Hi @CatApostrophe I know how you feel, it drives you crazy. My period was due yesterday. No sign yet. Boobs are a little sore. They'd usually be killing me a week before but not this month. Just tender since yesterday. I'm praying it won't come but I just know it will.
This is shit. You have my absolute sympathy . We all understand.

OP posts:
CatApostrophe · 07/05/2020 16:14

Hi, can I join, please? We have not been trying (and failing) for long (6 months) but the craziness has already kicked in. I spent the last week or so feeling my boobs every 10 min and they did feel sore (or that might have been the result of my throbbing Hmm). Also had some pink spotting on Monday/Tuesday.
Now, I had cramps and brown spotting today (first time) and I took an early test (period due in two days): negative.

So fuck you symptom spotting, turned me into a crazy person all for nothing. Sad

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 03/05/2020 16:09

@Icouldstillbejoseph Thank you. I appreciate the support here more than I can say. It's so hard. I don't really have anyone apart from DH to talk to about it in real life.

OP posts:
Icouldstillbejoseph · 03/05/2020 13:56

@PainintheholeSIL much love and understanding from me too
It's the shittiest feeling

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 03/05/2020 13:54

@Hannahb26 Thank you.

OP posts:
Hannahb26 · 03/05/2020 13:51

@painintheholeSIL sending love to you ❤️

Original poster
PainintheholeSIL · 03/05/2020 12:34

Fuck my fucking SIL who just rang to tell DH that she's pregnant again.
I'm so sad. I had to lock myself in the bathroom to cry.
Fuck this shit. I'm so fucking sick of it.

OP posts:
Yutes · 02/05/2020 09:53

Fuck this irregular period crap!

Alady1 · 19/04/2020 16:22

Yup, everybody is getting pregnant and every time it seems I have a weird cycle, I keep thinking that's it, it's me now, it's gonna happen to me... Nope, it's not, so fuck you TTC (for the last 3 years ) My cycles are so regular, I swear could tell the exact hour the witch is showing.... Again fuck you ttc
Sending loads of love to all of you

Hannahb26 · 19/04/2020 14:24

Hi everyone - sending love to you all. Is it me or are there SO MANY people getting pregnant/announcing it at the moment? I'm so happy for them but it's eating me up inside ☹️☹️☹️

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