TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 34 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's

@Mumlili9 Thank you so much, I'm in awe of your strength and compassion. I hope your recovery is going well.

@Ripple2020 Thank you, you're completely right and I think I do need to give myself some time. It's just difficult to because nobody else really understands and it's taking much longer to stop than the doctors seemed to think it would. I'm so sorry for your loss and fingers crossed that this is your month.

@Hayleylou89 oh ya that def sounds like a weak cervix maybe, possibly should have been given a stitch. I’ve researched a lot too and as awful as it is, it sounds like it should be an easy fix for next time! If u do get pregnant before your results they will prob put a push on things anyway! I had a meeting with a consultant just on Tue(exactly 3 months to the date of delivering my boy, such a long wait🙄) but I had a bleed behind my placenta, I had no symptoms that there was anything wrong. I’ve been given a plan for going forward which is very reassuring, weekly scans etc, but u know yourself there’s a long road ahead of us but hopefully it’s all worth it in the end! Even the doctors were like oh it’s gonna be an extremely stressful time etc but in my head I’m just trying to get that positive test and then I’ll tackle the next hurdle. My due date is April 10th so reaaaally hoping to be pregnant by then! Hope ur managing okay and going easy, it’s extremely difficult 3 months on but I just remember those initial weeks I couldn’t lift my head off the pillow, I was just crying all the time and although it’s still indescribable pain, it’s familiar and you can carry it a bit lighter is that makes sense!

@ravenwheeler so sorry for your loss. You’ve went through a very traumatic thing so just be easy on yourself, it’s so understanding to want to try again right away but just make sure u allow yourself to heal aswell - be gentle on yourself, I hope you get your rainbow baby soon x

@MissSparkles81 are your surges always that quick hun. Don't forget lots of drinks can make a difference. If I test am and pm over a couple of days my am ones are always negative and pale but by the evening they are blazing again so my cbfm sometimes misses my peak but I catch it on the easy@home tests. Just kept testing and of course dtd (coz it fun anyway) and fingers crossed 🤞

@ravenwheeler hello, welcome and sorry for your loss x this is a wonderful group so much friendship and support. Hope your recovery goes smoothly x

Okay if I join? MMC at 10 weeks, treatment a week later on 11 Feb (medical management but then manual extraction of the gestational sac the next day) but still waiting for the bleeding to stop and to get a negative test so that I can start TTC again.

@ripple2020

Hi Lovely,

My bleeding only lasted just under 2 weeks which i was so surprised about but i did have to have surgery for manual removal of the placenta following the birth so maybe they got alot of the messy bits out at the same time sorry tmi :( ..i was told it could be 6 weeks and iv been having all ovulation symptoms for the past week or so... we are waiting for the results from hosp but that wont be until April but my waters broke and im convinced i should have been given the stitch after having lots of cervical treatment but i was never put under a consultant and now in hindsight after researching i think i should of been monitored more closely but wasnt :( next time i will be high risk so monitored more closely but doesn't make it any easier :( x

@Hayleylou89 I’m so sorry for the loss of your little girl. Can I ask could they find a reason why this happened? I was the same when I had my little boy, I wanted to try again straight away but I bled for about 7 weeks after delivery so I waited. I stocked up on OPKs this month and booked a weekend away for during my fertile window so full steam ahead🤞🏼I’m more than ready now x

@Mumlili9 how are you doing physically? Did ur doctor have any reason for asking you to wait 3 months? I prob would wait until you’re feeling a bit better, as hard as it is when you just want to start again straight away I think it’s important to be gentle with yourself. You’ve went through a very traumatic experience and your body needs to be strong and ready for your next go because this will be the one!🤞🏼👊🏼 I don’t take anything for eggs etc, doctor in the PLU gave me prescription folic acid and baby aspirin and I’m taking iron supplements the last 3 months to try to keep my system strong - it’s prob in my head but I feel like this is helping my periods because I got my first one as soon as I started taking them!

@MissSparkles81 I’m not sure why the CB is negative but I wouldn’t take any chances and lock him into the bedroom now!! :) I used them last month n found them good but bought the boots brand to go alongside them this month too coz I’d like to see the progression and dip once I get my static! Don’t like that I can’t test once I get that!

Writing this has just made me realise I’m going into my 4th month since losing my little boy and thinkin that I’m not pregnant yet is very disheartening. Everyone kept telling me how fertile I would be straight after him so I thought I’d sneeze and get pregnant. Here’s hoping March is our month ladies and we all have beautiful Xmas babies.❤️

Im feeling very confused guys. I normally hit my peak around day 16/17 but this month it looks like day 14 (yesterday) which is fine but clearblue digital is showing as negative?

Any ideas?

I am going to keep testing and see what happens just wondered if anyone else had had similar?

@Hayleylou89 you never know you might just be blessed with your rainbow already fingers 🤞 xx

@Mumlili9

Ah really, ur still suffering, see im amazon how iv
Kind of returned to normal in the sense of not
Bleeding and feeling like iv ovulated or im getting those sort of symptoms this past week or so. And then im wondering why the tests earlier on in the week are clearly Negative but sure i can see a faint line on the more recent ones ... suppose test in a day or so and see if it gets any darker x

@Hayleylou89 that's OK hun. I had an ectopic pregnancy with surgery on the 18th and I'm still getting pregnancy symptoms. I was only 7 weeks so I imagine that at 22 weeks your hcg was much higher. It's so cruel that we still have to feel pregnant for weeks after our loss. Be gentle with your self xx

@Mumlili9

Yeah thats what im thinking it could be too.

that top test iv only just done this afternoon so ill do one with fmu and see what happens iv had a few mild symptoms but its hard to know if there pregnancy loss symptoms and everything going back to normal or new pregnancy symptoms. Thanks for replying 😘 x

@Hayleylou89 it could left over hcg. I would say wait 48 and test again hun. I so sorry for your loss. Welcome to this group of lovely ladies.

@Whiffle77i know what you mean about wanting to do something.

This waiting to heal thing is driving me mad. Hpt is practically negative now so I thought I would do an opk and got a line but I can't work out if the opk is picking up hcg or lh. I hate this limbo. Doctor said we should wait 3 months to ttc and midwife said one full cycle so I don't know what to believe.
I'm far to sore for dtd but I really miss the closeness. He keeps saying he doesn't want to hurt me but I feel so lonely if that makes sense.

How are you ladies getting along?

Hi all - we recently lost our baby girl at 22 wks at the start of the month and decided to ttc as soon as possible as its what we want more than anything in the world and its a time when ur most fertile, i know its possible to conceive again before ur first period arrives which is due in the next week or 2 (as i dnt know how my cycles will actually return to normal) but do these top two cheap pg test show a v v faint second line to any of you? Dont know what to make of them as i dont know if iv ovulated etc although iv had the ovulation pains etc im thinking this could just be my body getting back to normal after our loss x 😒

Hope you are doing ok @mumlili9
Since my MC I have been taking ridiculously expensive zita west vitamins, and her dha. I've also made my husband take her vitamins! No idea if it's doing any good as only had my MC a month ago but it makes me feel like I'm doing something. Also doing acupuncture but that is more for my general health

What do you ladies take / do for egg quality? My age is really starting to worry me now, I haven't got long left.

@Ripple2020 @avocadoincident thank you x

@Debingirlies I’m sorry, I’ve been thinking about my words in my post above and I think they have come across as harsher than I meant them to. I don’t mean that there is no moving forward or no good days to come, just that maybe getting over isn’t a helpful way of thinking about our losses x

@JuniperAndRose
Well done for going for the job AND getting it. But also well done for not being scared to turn it down. It's not now or never. Xxx

@Mumlili9 it’s cruel. Do you become pregnant easily? The unknown must be torture, I’m racking my brain trying to think of why this could be happening to you, I can only imagine the places you’ve visited in your mind while on this journey. You sound like you are keeping a positive mindset though, in terms of remaining hopeful and I think there’s a lot to be said for that. Once you have hope you have a fight in you and as awful as this must be I think you must not give up, you will have your baby someday, hopefully soon, but by the looks of things there are a lot of people rooting for you and I hope you keep this strength x

@JuniperAndRose so sorry for your little girl, I share in your pain. Again I’m new to this so sorry if I ask you to repeat shared information but can I ask how you’re healing physically? I know the heartache is endless. Have you thought about or started TTC again? x

Hi ladies
@Debingirlies i'm so sorry for your loss. I completely agree with @avocadoincident and @Ripples2020. there isn't really a getting over it, there is just gathering up all your courage with both hands, and trying to be as kind to yourself as you can. The people who really count won't judge you. You and your partner can focus on looking after yourselves, your girls and your beautiful angel baby. Nobody else's opinion really matters.

@VenusStarr and @avocadoincident I'm glad to hear of your positive appointments.

waves @BunnytheBee no need to apologise for taking time out! I hope that you are having a gentle weekend and being well looked after.

I am currently having a very long cycle, with no sign of ovulation. I am wondering if it is just my body taking some time to get back to normal.

I also managed to give myself a very stressful week this week. I saw a job advertised that was an incredibly interesting role, that doesn't really come up very often. I applied thinking that I should go for it as the role was so interesting, but didn't really think it would get anywhere. I went to the interview and got offered the job! Today I have declined the role as I think I just won't be able to cope with it. I know that you shouldn't put your life on hold when TTC, but really it's difficult not to. I also went back to work three months after DD1 was stillborn and looking back it was a mistake to push myself to do that. So, pushing myself to take a new job, no matter how interesting the role sounds, is probably the wrong decision at this point.

I hope everyone has gentle weekends xx

@Ripple2020 hi hun yeah the ectopic is unrelated in so much that the baby was actually alive. I've had 8 uterine mc's and one ectopic with a second pregnancy inter uterine blighted ovum. My uterus is normal shape and as far as tests go I'm as normal as it gets. Everything about me is plain old average I'm a tad overweight at size 16 and older at 38 though. I have regular 26 - 28 day cycles with out fail although extremely light, I had a scan to measure my lining but it was 9mm so again average (i do wonder where the blood goes each month though) Text book nothing wrong. It's unexplained. I just have to hope that one day we get lucky.

@avocadoincident I’m so sorry for your little girl. Did you find a reason why it might have happened? 100%, my mind is still totally consumed with it all and I feel like everybody else’s lives have went back to normal!OH is very good for talking though. How are you physically? I still have some spotting before AF which makes me uneasy, I guess we will always think the worst of everything now. Where do ye stand with TTC again?

@Mumlili9 reading that my first thought is, it doesn’t get tougher than that - I’d imagine you thought the same though and have been proven wrong. How the hell have they not been able to find something! How many MCs in total? Hate to ask Qs if you’ve prev provided the info but have they checked the shape of your uterus etc? I would have thought ectopic was one of those bad luck events -not necessarily associated with fertility issues. It must be so frustrating that you can get pregnant but this keeps happening. It’s awful, when your body is screaming at you to protect your baby. We have no control over any of the process. I do naively thought I’d have a baby when I’m ready and labouring will be the difficult part, it’s actually gettin there is the difficult part. I have a friend due the day after my due date and another due 3 days after and I feel like I can’t even go to the shops for fear of bumping into them!