ttc after mc July/August 2007 - shiny new thread as the other was full

Jules - that sounds like a lovely idea. It was the due date of my first LO today and I spent it out in the sunshine with DP and DSD, and was actually a really good day, tinged with sad, but full of laughter and cuddles all round. Made me feel lucky for what I have as well as sad for what I lost.
I started seeing my therapist again after my MC, and that (with MN) really helps me, I still see her and is so good to have someone there for me to howl at about the unfairness or whatever I want to do, grieve, be scared whatever. I hope you find something useful too. Will be thinking of you tomorrow x

Thats a lovely message gillydaffodil

Flossie F - good choice on movie - I think watching knocked up would throw me over the edge at the moment!

Munz - really sorry to read about your situation. This on top of the mc is just too much. I'm sure things will work out for you eventually, but in the meantime, all strength to you.

Justjules - I don't know what to say. You sound so low, and after what you have been through, that is entirely understandable. Seeking help in dealing with your losses sounds like a very good idea. I hope your dp will support you in this. You've already been through so much together that your relationship must be under significant strain. Hang on in there - given time, I'm sure you'll come out the other side.

Hope everyone else is OK, and had a good weekend BDing, peeing on sticks, avoiding babies, decluttering or whatever. I went to see Run Fat Boy Run - quite good - no babies involved, just one small child, so a better bet than Knocked Up.

Munz - we are all thinking of you. Please post when you feel like it so we can keep up with how you are doing xxx

Just Jules - i will be thinking of you tommorow. Have you thought of speaking to a counsellor? Maybe the MiscarriageAssociation could recommend someone. Unfortunately we all deal with things differently - but it doesnt mean you are not dealing with it correctly.It is going to take time and the anniversarys are always going to be difficult. Big hugs to you. I'm sure you and your DH will find the path back to each other soon xxx

yes it's me girls (pipsqueeke/shagsalot/munz)- might as well go back to my very very first name! lol.

thanks for all your well wishes - but obv i'll be leving you all now - def no chance of me having a BFP any time soon!

good luck with it all - will hopefully see some BFP announcments soon - not that's i'll be stalking any of you! - just the girls for the march 2008 thread! lol.

poor poor shagsalot.

mccheser and triggles - sorry you are here, hope you are doing as okay as you can be and here's to the future with bfp etc.

i am moving later this month (found a lovely flat across from a park and museum, so yay,won't have to live about a nightclub anymore), so I spent the whole day yesterday bring down stuff from the attic and sorting it. then sold loads and loads of stuff at a flea market today. its was such a cleansing experience - quite galling to see all these vintage and designer clothes and shoes and bags, being sold for pennies but i feel like i turned a corner somehow.
anyway, i made a couple hundred quid and don't have to move all that crap now!

hope you ladies are doing okay and had great weekends whereever you are.

Mcchesers - probably nothing to worry about but worth checking with the doctor. TTC after a mc is a totally personal decision - i was just highlighting there is no physical risk. I'm scared about my next AF as well. I have just ovulated so i am expecting it in 2 weeks time.I didnt experience any pain with D&C but think my AF will probably remind me of mc .

LissieLou - good luck with the move

Triggles - sorry about your mc but welcome to the thread. We are TTC straight away D&C 3 weeks ago (i was 11 weeks). Good luck xx

Hello to everyone else

lcy - my medical evac was on the 21st of aug and then I bled for two weeks after. I'm going to phone my gp tomorrow as I'm still a little sore around my uterus if I sit up or walk around a lot. Anyone else have this? Is this normal. I'm dead scared about my next AF.

I'm certainly not trying to discourage anyone, only passing on what the hospital suggested to me about waiting to TTC. I was so out of my head that I went with what I thought was right at the time based on the consultant's advice. I now know lots of people that have conceived straight after a MC but I was just trying to explain how I came to my decision at the time. I'm so sad to see you and so many other familiar names here. Here's to BFPs in 2007.

triggles, sorry for your loss. the docs do like you to wait 1 cycle before ttc again, mainly for dating purposes but also because a mc is pysically very traumatic as well as emotionally and you will need to grieve for your baby.

well ladies, this is me saying bye bye for a few days. we move on tues so i need to get everything else packed and sorted. will think of you all and hopefully i'll come back to a few bfps.x

Hi. I'm new, just had miscarriage starting 11 days ago, at 10 weeks. DH & I are hoping to start ttc again right away. We haven't been told that we can't (although technically we haven't been told that we can either! ) But I'd like to think if they thought it was a BIG concern, it would have been mentioned, right? We had a loss in May and were told then we could try again right away. Anyone else ttc again immediately afterwards? DH is 42 and I'm 41, so we're definitely feeling that clock ticking and don't want to wait if we don't have to.

Mcchesers - what do you mean 'still kind of sore' - how long has it been since your mc? It may be worth checking with your doctor.

By the way there is no scientific evidence that trying again straight after miscarriage (ERPC, MM, or natural) increases the risk of future mc. Alot of us on here are trying again straight after mc - I started having sex 8 days after D&C and have just ovulated - so now on 2 week wait

liketosleep - I wasn't brave so much as out of my mind. Very smart move cleaning the house! You won't be doing much tomorrow once the pill kicks in and definitely on Tues week you'll be tired out. If you have ANY questions at all I'll be around and here for you sweets!
At the hospital bring something the drink, eat, and squeeze hospital food was blech. Even the dinner lady apologised to me. DH ended up eating it and I had a sandwich.

Sweetkitty- I'm on the October board for TTC.

A funny thing.. you know after weeks of all this knicker checking I told my gf that I was sick to death of seeing my fanny. She said, if you eat enough cake doll you never will see it again!

hi sweetkitty im feeling fine today thanks xx

mcchesters hopw you are ok and bravo for jumping straight onto a plane afterwards! I guarentee i will be lying in bed feeling sorry for myself getting all the housework done today just incase the tablet tomorrow starts anything off. Arent sundays BORING!!!

here it is I only found it as i was there and noticed the name at the bottom poor shagalot

Morning all

iliketosleep - how you feeling this morning? I felt like you do just wanted to get it all over and done with and when it was in ome ways it was worse as I felt fine but there was such a sense of loss. I think thats the way I am dealing with it first the physical side then the emotional side takes over. My body was actually ovulating whilst I was bleeding which I think is utterly mad but shows you how fast your body deals with it. I'm on CD3 now and ready to ttc again now.

mcchesers - thanks for all your kind words and being really frank about things, I think you are right it is better to knowwhats going on. Sorry about what you have been through too it's so bloddy hard isn't it? So are you feeling ready to begin this ttc madness all over again? Come and join us on the ttc Sept thread although for some of us it will be at least October before we get our BFP.

Lcy - yes it was terrible more so when DP wasn't there and I was on my own with the DDs but in some ways it probably helped as I was so tied up with them that I didn't have time to dwell on what was happening and you have to quickly dry your tears and get on with a discussion about Peppa Pig or something like that IYSWIM.

big good mornign to everyone else

shagsalot - thinking about you too ((((hugs))))

I thought, if its ok with you all, to give my 2p just in case someone like me was in my position and frantically googling for answers.

I really wanted to mc at home naturally. I got the scan about my mmc (no fetus tiny sac and yolk only) on the 30th of July with no better news the next monday's scan (no growth) and a bit of spotting shortly thereafter. For the next three weeks I set on the couch waiting and nothing happened but a bit more spotting. I went back to the EPA and asked to go forward with the medical mgmt. Bare in mind that I have nightmare periods so figured would be ok with pain and blood.

Sunday I went to hosp to get the pills it was just cramps and a some red blood w/ medium sized clots. I went back to hosp on Tuesday at 8:30am, had another scan at 10 am and went ahead with the pessiaries to start the labour and suppositories (the nurse let me do that myself to let me have what was left of my diginity). She set up a cardboard bedpan in the toilet that I had my own room.

One hour later it was pretty hard and heavy cramping with heavy bleeding like I've never had before until about 6:30pm when I finally passed the sac and tissue. They kept me in until 8:00pm to make sure that the heavy clots and contractions were over. Otherwise the gyn would have checked me out to make sure there weren't any products of conception still stuck in the womb.

I went home limp and managed to dope myself up and get on a plane to the states to see my mom and family. I bled on and off for two more weeks and finally stopped completely on sept 1st.

I chose this option as it gave me the max time to allow for travel, otherwise it would have been a ERPC the day before the flight. I was freaking out and wanted to see my mom so I did what I had to do. The hospital nurses were really good to me. I had my own room and my DH to keep me sane and make sure I was getting the drugs in a timely fashion. You must have a partner or close friend, bring comforting things, lots of water, and snacks and things to read. I was also told this method would allow for us to TTC after the next cycle. The ERPC recommended 3 cycles wait. The med evac is humbling and you will need the support.

I didn't dare say a word about any of this before but now I know that sadly many will have to make this decision. It messed me up really badly for a while, but I feel myself thawing out. I cried thinking about chucking out my maternity clothes. I'm still in this game damnit. Roll on October

Anyone know if I have to go back to the hospital to get an "All Clear" ? I'm just kind of sore still. Thanks so much for listening and letting me share ladies. I hope I didn't go on too much.

SK- I hear you about being hit hard and people can say the most insensitive things. I'm in Glasgow if you need anything or want to chat. We don't have any kids yet so can help at any time

night all and thanks for your help xx

Me too, Night Night