TTC after loss penguins get fit & healthy in 2020

Leon is amazing! Every time we head down to London we always go. I wish they would open a branch in Scotland. I am coeliac and they are fab with their gluten free options.

@EssJayyCee it's definitely hard work staying motivated. I've had a bad week with food, if I start off the week badly i find it hard to get back into the groove but i try to make up for it by doing some exercise. Not easy most of the time but don't be too hard on yourself, tomorrow is a new day.

@Avocuddles I love Leon, their halloumi wraps are delish and they some very nice waffle chips which aren't massively healthy but taste amazing.

I had wine last night with my friend which was a bad idea as I've felt rubbish today. I'm thinking of giving up the booze for a while, it's not helping me. Healthy dinner tonight with tofu and PT tomorrow. Trying to get back on track this weekend if I can.

@EssJayyCee its so blummin hard isn't it? In terms of motivation I am just taking one day at a time rather than looking at the bigger picture.

I am struggling to keep up with any threads at the moment.
I don't know if it's been my subconscious telling me not to go on mumsnet or what but I've just not had any urge to come on here.

I have given up with WW it was so confusing and restrictive!

I feel like I'm getting fatter and fatter and I have no willpower to not eat the bad foods.

How are you all staying motivated?

@Seahawk80 Pregnant after loss and dreaming of rainbows.... www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/3801729-pregnant-after-loss-and-dreaming-of-rainbows

Thanks @Avocuddles and congratulations!! Sorry I've had no time for a proper catch up yet! It's such a nervous old time isn't it. Yesterday's euphoria has worn off now and I'm stressing about my 12 week results. Did you mean the grads thread or another one? If you send a link I'd be happy to share. I've decided to at least have my 5 a day as an easy goal at the moment!

Ladies.

I've given some thought to certain things that were said on this thread and concluded I don't feel comfortable with them.

Grief shouldn't be compared, rated, and no assumptions should be made about it. In my view, it is not a contest of who's most hard done by either.

Mothers following a MC get absolutely nothing and that is wrong. A choice to use a two week parental bereavement leave should be provided to them because they lost a baby. Whether they use it, or how much of it they'll decide to use, should be up to them depending on how they feel.

I hoped this place would be safe and supportive and that it would help all of us pick each other up after tragic events that should bring us together, not cause division, and that we'd all move forward.

At no point had I ever trivialised anyone's experience and always tried to treat everyone equally, as I think all bereaved should be approached. However, I have been accused of trivialising stillbirth by comparing it to miscarriage, in my view, incorrectly, as I've not compared the two events, but stated that people's reactions to them vary and may be very profound after MC, as well as stillbirth. Whereas grieving mothers after stillbirth are rightly entitled to maternity leave, mothers following a miscarriage are not acknowledged by law at all. They shouldn't have to use sick leave. They are bereaved and the mere 2 weeks of parental bereavement leave is the very least that should be available if they need it.

I also feel that by way of certain comments, my own experience have been trivialised. A miscarriage isn't, in my view, remotely comparable to losing a job or a pet and bringing this kind of examples up on here knowing our histories and difficulties most of us have been through post baby loss is not appropriate to me.

Both, miscarriage and stillbirth mean losing a human baby. Both in most cases lead to grief that only the grieving mother can imagine.

Whilst opinions may vary and I have tried to approach this with understanding and compassion, I have to say hand on heart that I find a number of comments that have been made unacceptable.

And in view of the fact they come from Bunny who runs this thread, I'll just remove myself from it going forward.

Sorry about the long post, I wanted to make clear how I feel and say the very best of luck to you on your TTC journeys, to those of you in early pregnancy post-loss now and on the health kick. I shall continue with the latter privately, please wish me luck too. Thank you for all your support to date, to all of you. Xxx

@Seahawk80 just been catching up on the friend and was so happy to see your very encouraging news, I'm glad things are looking positive. I really hope they continue along the same trajectory.
It would be brilliant if you could also share your story on the Pregnant after loss board - there are a lot of very nervous ladies there who would definitely benefit from hearing a good news story to boost their spirits at a scary time. I'm 5+2 today and very much in 'bricking it' territory at the moment.

Mmmm @Shefliesonherownwings you've inspired me to cook a Thai curry tonight! I'm another super spicy fan....I always have an emergency pot of dried birds eye chillis to hand to spice up my own portion as DH's tolerance isn't quite as high!

@MrsMGE great shout re writing to your MP. It's a very emotive subject and one that is woefully ignored a lot of the time, though i feel encouraged to have seen what feel like quite a few national press stories around miscarriage and stillbirth recently.

@MissSparkles81 well done with the healthy eating and long may the BDing continue!

@BunnytheBlueWhale hope you enjoyed your pizza express. Don't know if you've seen but I'm excited that a branch of Leon has opened up at the train station - great for hearty and healthy lunches....

@tortiecat you've reminded me that I have some hotel chocolat goodies hidden away in the cupboard - I was working on the out of sight out of mind theory but think I might be digging them this evening 😉

Hope you are all ok, I'm very much following everything that is going on and although my healthy habits have slipped somewhat over the past week or so i do need to get back on it and find some great inspiration here x

@Seahawk80 Delighted for you 🌺 Keeping everything crossed everything goes well for you ❤️ xxx

Thanks @BunnytheBlueWhale still in a bit of shock here! My bleeding all stopped so as soon as this cough is gone I'm getting back to couch 2 5k! I'm also going to get back on the healthy bandwagon when nausea allows, mind you just ate crisps with my lunch to make it go away 🤦‍♀️

@Shefliesonherownwings I love a spicy currry and chilli flakes are great for adding extra spice after cooking

Hey everyone, sorry I've been away, I have been feeling really low and also pretty crap physically. I'd been feeling so sick on and off, more than in other pregnancies and assumed it was a cruel trick of nature and my body still think it was pregnant. I also caught a horrible cough from DS which kept me awake at night and made my nausea worse as I would cough so hard I would retch. As you can imagine being healthy has been the last thing on my mind. I was planning to come back once I was better and was assuming I'd have surgical management after my rescan yesterday. However I got the shock of my life when they told me everything was ok and showed me the heartbeat!! They can't explain what happened but 2 weeks ago I was 6+6 and they said I was measuring 4-5 weeks. So yesterday I should have been 8+6 and measuring 8+1 so something is out somewhere. Feel happy but hard to take it in and I'm still worried about why I was so behind and suddenly caught up. I also know I've still got the 12 week tests to get through but getting a second chance is amazing. Just wanted to update you all as you've been so lovely xx

@Shefliesonherownwings You may try using different curry paste/powder too, I got a mild one at home but pretty sure DH bought a different one before which had more spice in it. Glad you enjoyed your spin! Did you use to go regularly before your pg? I haven't been for years, not sure I'd keep up now 🤦🏼‍♀️

Good morning everyone. I did my first spinning class for yonks last night and I have to say it was really good. My PT took the class and it was just nice to get back into something I used to really enjoy. He played good music too which helped. I'm aching today though!

I have a friend coming over this evening, I'm making a healthy thai green chicken curry and WW rocky road bites. My friend likes her curry super spicy so I'm doing hers separately as DH and I don't like it too spicy but not sure how best to really spice it up. Just put loads of chillis in hers? Any ideas?

Hey tortiecat 😊 AF arrived today! I'm kind of happy it's here actually, it's bringing me closer to restarting TTC. How are you feeling? I love kefir. Have you tried mango & turmeric or honey & coconut from The Collective? I have a rather boring ham & veg sandwich for lunch today and then a lovely Italian chicken dish from italianfoodforever.com website. I very much recommend this website btw!!

Morning all. Back to healthy lifestyles...what are we all eating today? Today I had a chopped up nectarine and some blueberries with Yeo Valley kefir yoghurt, it was lovely (and I didn't spill it!) but I've had it three days in a row and I am bored. I have a large roll with hummus and roast veg for lunch, and a tiny bar of Hotel Chocolat dark chocolate (leftover from a Christmas gift box!) for after spin class. As AF is here, I am going to have a large glass of rosé when out with the team this evening

And yes, @BunnytheBlueWhale, you did say I was offended and then you've removed the post. Really? Are we in primary school here?

I'm not even getting into this any further as you're clearly on edge but I'll tell you two things straight: 1. You've misunderstood the point and you're barking at a wrong tree. But I understand this isn't an easy time for anyone on here, so I'm not going to get upset over this. 2. Every loss suffered on this thread, no matter when and how, is the most important to the mother. And for that reason, any comparisons or the types of arguments that you've posted recently are out of order.

That is the end to me and I'm not getting into further discussions on this.

@BunnytheBlueWhale I think you're misinterpreting my posts big time and thrn jumping on me, which I do not appreciate at all and I'm not planning to explain my point again because you seem to be taking it all personally when it clearly isn't. Hope you have a good day.

@BunnytheBlueWhale I've never said I was offended though. The point I'm making is that the availability should be there for everyone because it is not for the legislator to decide on people's personal feelings.

I'd never tell you how you'd supposed to feel after stillbirth vs miscarriage. Whether you'd supposed to feel better after an early loss or late loss or loss in childhood. You may have in reality but that's how it worked for you. It doesn't mean everyone is the same. This is the situation we're facing now, the legislator is making assumptions and it is happening because they simply want to save money. Let's underinvest in research into reducing the number of miscarriages. Let's not give parents losing a child to mc any paid leave because there are so many of them, it would cost us too much. The Government can't have it both ways.