TTC after miscarriage - January 2020

Hello. Hope it's ok for me to join. I found out I was pregnant last July, really struggled in the early stages. I was exhausted, barely had the energy to stand. Went for an early scan but was told it was too soon and to come back the following week. We went back 3 weeks later as we went on holiday, to be told the sonographer thought she could see 2 heartbeats but to come back again the following week. The following week we were confirmed as having MCMA twins, so they were sharing a sac and a placenta. This meant they were super high risk. I did lots of reading and found that only 50% of MCMA twins make it to 24 weeks, so I struggled to get excited about the pregnancy and felt pretty depressed about it all.

High risk meant more scans. We turned up to our 16 week scan expecting to see 2 bouncing babies, to be told they'd both passed away. We started medical management the following day and I gave birth to my baby girls on 27th September. I was devastated and felt guilty as I could o ly think of trying again ASAP. We decided we would try after xmas. I've had 3 periods since MMC, my last cycle was 28 days so I'm hoping I'm back to normal. According to Ovia I'm in the fertile window as of yesterday. I've had a faint line on OPK this morning, but not a positive so we'll keep DTD for a few more days.

With my 2yo and twins I only DTD once in the cycle I got pregnant, so there is hope even if you're not at it like rabbits!

@Peach7744 sorry for your loss
I bought a clear blue advanced digital fertility monitor which shows if you ovulate each month and also indicates when so sex can be timed xXx

I am so sorry for all of your losses.
I had a miscarriage in August (at 6 weeks ) and the holidays have been Really difficult . I think knowing I should be around 6 months pregnant now, and spending time with various friends including one couple who we were due only 4 weeks after .
Not made easier by the fact that I’m now inadvertently making my husband feel like he doesn’t make me happy / isn’t enough as I’m so sad
I hope we all have a better 2020! xxx

Hi, I'm hoping to be ttc later this month.
Was feeling funny with a bit of spotting December 19th, had my bloods taken and returned 48 hours later for repeat test, which confirmed hcg had dropped by a third, so miscarriage was going to happen.
The day between my blood tests I had painful cramps but minimal bleeding.
Anyway... Spent the last 10 days with minimal spotting and feeling worried as to why there had been not much bleeding, rang EPU who said that was probably it and I could start to move on.... Only for painful cramps and heavy bleeding to start late on 30th....11 days after I was told it was "happening". This was my first pregnancy and we got pregnant on our first cycle ttc, was only around 5 weeks 5 days when went for the first bloods.

Does anyone have any advice on how long the bleeding will take to stop? Most things online say it will start and finish within 2 weeks of been told... Really hoping it's not going to be another 2 weeks from now!

@MilsCookie think we all know how you feel. But if she is a good friend you don’t need to put on a brave face. She will know you are happy for her but also that you’re hurting. Just remember that there is no right or wrong way to go through this and grieve x

Ahh that’s a lovely end to a rubbish year then @Anny27. congrats

Nope didn’t have a clue until I went for my scan so was all a lot of info to take in at the time.

@MilsCookie I’m so sorry for your loss and thank you for sharing your scan. It’s so important to remember that our little ones existed ✨My step-sister and I were due at the same time and my niece was born in November. It took me a while to go and see her as it felt so raw. I don’t think anything makes the initial bit any easier so if you need to cry just let it out, I’m sure your friend will understand.

@GoldenBauble Thanks for sharing your advice on my OPKs- I’ll keep everyone in the loop! The nhs ovulation calculator says it should be this weekend so fingers crossed 🤞

@MilsCookie I totally understand how you feel and you are not a horrible person for feeling this way. In fact I think it’s totally normal! My two best friends are currently pregnant now and I too feel exactly the same as you. Maybe tell her what’s happened if you haven’t already I am sure she will understand. And in the meantime, be kind to yourself and just go with the emotions! I’ve found trying to bottle them up and power on not helpful!!
Also, remember, I am sure that you will be pregnant too and joining her. 💖

@Anny27 congratulations! That's lovely news. I always think NYE is a great day to have a birthday 🍾

@disneymummysince2010 I used to use opks and mine never showed as being blatantly positive either. I could see the progression with the like getting dark but it was never as dark as the control line despite me testing 2-3 times a day 😳 and I fell pregnant so was definitely ovulating! So I would say don't waste anytime as that looks like it's heading towards positive 😉

@milscookie I know how you feel. I'm convinced that two of our friends are due to announce a pregnancy soon and as happy as I would be for them, the thought already makes me want to cry. As much as I wouldn't want to feel any resentment I think I wouldn't be able to help but feel a little bit of 'that should have been me'. I actually thought some of our other friends were going to tell us they were pregnant over Christmas and I actually felt a sense of relief when they kept ordering alcoholic drinks at the bar and no announcement came. Then I felt guilty too for feeling this way! Strange emotions. I'm sure they will pass in time it's just right now it feels raw, especially if they are due around the time we would have been having our babies.

@MilsCookie I have another nephew so this is 2nd time aunty duties 😊

Awwwh thats tricky! Does she know about your miscarriage?

Atleast you are kinda preparing yourself for the news. I think If you do cry you could kind of pass it off as being happy tears for her? I am a happy crier so it would be believable for me.

Hope it goes well xxx

Thank you @ChampooPapi I'll certainly be giving him lots of cuddles hoping that it sends a message to my womb to make a little cousin for him 🤪😂

@Anny27 congratulations on the birth of your nephew, a good omen for our thread for this new year I'd say 💜👣

Mmm not sure @disneymummysince2010 but looks like its gearing up to ovulate 🤞not positive yet though and mine usually progress quite quickly from almost blank to very positive

Here are my OPKs so far (top is 30th, then 31st and then two from today).

I’m not sure when my fertile window is? I started spotting from 19th last month for five days and then had a semi-heavy bleed for only two days 24th and 25th. So I’m not sure when day 1 of my cycle was?! So thought it best to start OPKs earlier this month. The first is slightly lighter than today’s but not by much!

Does anyone else have any ideas?

Hope you all had a fab NYE :D I was happy to say goodbye to 2019 and even though it was a rubbish year it ended with my gorgeous nephew being born on NYE so even the bad year had a silver lining :)

@mlax definitley looks nearly positive! And actually, the month I fell pregnant i actually didn't get a positive positive only a nearly positive :D

@ELM7 that would be amazing wouldn't it haha! Did you know about your double womb before the pregnancy?

@StephyRose welcome lovely:D glad to see you on the conception boards too 😘

Everyone else saying they felt like a virgin again and I certainly did and got the first "dtd" over with after not DTD during pregnancy.....kinda embarrassed to say that haha but I was very nervous about miscarriage so didn't dtd.....it didn't make a different as miscarried anyway 🙈

It’s definitely on its way to a positive opk @mlax

🤞

@StephyRose that's what I thought, it's almost like borderline isn't it! We DTD yesterday morning and it was negative but this is a lot darker today. I guess we'll just DTD and hope for the best! Thank you xx

Hi @mlax

I always thought in order for a positive result on an ovulation strip, it needs to be as dark or darker than the test line. However yours is very close so I would say BD like mad anyway! 🤣 My partner and I BD a few days before I ovulated when I concieved last time - and that day only that month - so I know you can defo get pregnant a few days before. :)

Happy New Year lovelies.

Could anybody help me out and let me know what they think to this ovulation stick? Is this a positive... I feel like it is but not sure... thank you xx

@MilsCookie thank you. Yes so sad to walk into that room full of excitement and leave totally shocked - traumatic doesn’t even cover it.
I hope everyone got through New Years - it all hit me again at a family party, very emotional night but today is a new year and a new start and we will all get our little rainbows in 2020 xxxx

Happy New Year Ladies. Very glad to be rid of 2019 and hopeful that 2020 will be a better year for us all.

Sorry haven’t replied earlier @Anny27 -
Both babies were in the same side. That’s my Husbands plan this year for us to try and get pregnant in both uteruses at once for a trip to see Phil and Holly on This Morning 😂 Just joking.

I have found the post on here about the double uteruses but lots of different experiences so need to medically understand my case first.

So glad we all have each other who actually understand how we are all feeling. 🤞🏻 For lots of BFP very soon. x