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Original poster

The Hut of Gl/Doom Part V- for the unapologetically despondent

986 replies

duchesse · 01/08/2007 08:56

The new hut. Ta-da!

This one is a snug little basement World War 2 type nightclub, with dim lighting, snug velvet sofas, red walls and certainly no politically correct smoking bans. Occasionally certain selected men may be admitted at our convenience.

Sit down, make yourselves at home, and never, ever apologise for feeling like shit. That's about it.

OP posts:
thetryingistrying · 11/10/2007 13:56

slinks into hut, refused to look anyone in the eye adn sulks. (is that ok?)

Original poster
duchesse · 11/10/2007 13:31

Absolutely. We are here whenever you need us. What you are going through is crap, there's no three ways to look at it. You're caught in a catch 22 and have every reason to be sad. I really hope that things start to improve for you soon...

OP posts:
lissiethevampireslayer · 11/10/2007 13:20

oh nelli, youre in the right place.

Nelli32 · 11/10/2007 13:19

Hi there - I haven't posted on here for ages, but I think it the only place for me so I hope noone minds me popping in.

I am miserable. I feel so very sad all the time. I could cry at any second throughout my whole day! I obviously keep it together at work but at home I just feel so very sad. My husband is great but after 4 yrs of it he not sure how to handle it any more and I don't blame hime cause neither do I.

we've been ttc for 4 yrs , been through IVF once, going again in Jan and I know I am lucky and have alot to be thankful for but I just feel so terribly sad and pissed off because it seems so easy for everyone else and i hate to sound like a child but its not bloody fair.

All my friends have children and my relationship with them has changed which I completely understand but because I am in the situation I am in, I feel like I'm loosing my support network, I'm losing my friends and no one understands, no one. I feel very lonely.
Thanks for being here

lissiethevampireslayer · 09/10/2007 12:03

yes, i explained to the secretary that we've had another mc quite recently which meant putting off ttc and has affected dh's thoughts on it, just spoken to him and he's promised to make more of an effort. the prob is that the last mc has really messed up my body/cycles and dh is getting a bit scared now, plus it's less likely to be a prob with him tbh

Original poster
duchesse · 09/10/2007 11:59

That's fab! It's a shame your husband is still burying his face in the sand a bit. Will he come with to the the consultant's? Maybe he needs to hear the problems in detail from someone else's mouth, so he can understand it's ain't going to happen by itself.

OP posts:
lissiethevampireslayer · 09/10/2007 11:57

lol, thats so true. still, just spoken to consultants secretary and and she's got us in for a fortnight yesterday.

Original poster
duchesse · 09/10/2007 11:49

The plural of anecdote is data, in many people's minds...

OP posts:
lissiethevampireslayer · 09/10/2007 11:45

phew thank you. wow, you have been working hard! 6.20? thats when i get up!

my stepmum (when i said that dh and i were looking at 2 bed houses for when we've graduated) told me that i just need to relax, thats how i got pg with ds. adoption social worker came round, 6w later i got a bfp. oh theres this woman who tried for 17y then had 4 lots of triplets naturally in the space of 2y (exagerrated a bit) she doesnt understand that lightening doesnt strike twice. to top things off, i have to decide whether to take things further with the hospital complaint and missed my cons appt for yesterday coz dh has fannied around with his tests and not done ANY of them. i have dye injected into my fanjo, Vats of blood taken, prodded, poked by the coldest hands in england and he cant have a w*nk.
nobhead

Original poster
duchesse · 09/10/2007 11:29

God lissie, you are the last person who could ever offend me about this!! I've just been really busy since Sunday- my daughter's school has been in in the news a fair bit (in a good way, I'm pleased to report), and I've been spending my time either there or finishing work at ridiculous times of the night (got to bed at 6:20am this morning- work luckily now finished). No, with all you've been through, you could never say anything insensitive.

That's essentially what I meant when I said I felt hopeful for you- you've got years on me, and even though I suppose that in an ideal world you wouldn't want a very large gap between your children, what I meant was that you had a lot more time to try to get something sorted out. You must get sick of people saying "Oh, you'll be fine, you've got years yet!" because actually age has very little to do with your ftc problems. It's just that if anything can be done for you, it's more likely to work because you do have age on your side.

OP posts:
lissiethevampireslayer · 09/10/2007 09:00

sorry, just reread that last post and saw how insensitive of me it was. what i was trying to say is that we have been ftc for 2y now and im v aware that it gets harder as you get older. so i apologise to anyone i may have offended x

lissiethevampireslayer · 08/10/2007 08:21

less hopeful i suppose. im v aware that these are my "fertile years" and if i cant stay knocked up now then perhaps i never will. i know that in the scheme of things im vv lucky. i have ds and im 30 in jan, so not old, but if anything that makes it harder. people my age are popping out babies left, right and centre.

am i making sense?

Original poster
duchesse · 08/10/2007 07:21

Or one of those really lethal enamelled paraffin things like my granny had. The smell of paraffin always reminds me of her kitchen somehow.

How am I? Fine really I sppose. A friend has just announced her first pregnancy; she's pretty much the same age as me, had a really nasty health scare a few years ago, and only had a bit of one ovary left, so I am DELIGHTED for her, if a teensy weensy bit wistful as well.

How're you my dear? I am very hopeful for you.

OP posts:
lissiethevampireslayer · 07/10/2007 22:25

i think a little woodburner in the corner could work, or one of those portable gas heater that weigh 7000 tonnes.

how are you duchesse?

Original poster
duchesse · 07/10/2007 18:58

bounces from Dartmoor in windswept and smelling of wood smoke

Hello all! Of course, being rebels is what the hut is about partly. Although ordinarily I couldn't possibly condone santa grottos in October, if it is an ironic grotto designed to highlight the whole sorry phenomenon, then let's go for it. This hut, btw, is a kind of dingy 1940s cabaret club, pre PCness of any kind, with velvet settles, plenty of alcohol and Woodbine smoke. We could certainly add heating of some description.

OP posts:
lissiethevampireslayer · 06/10/2007 18:28

LNO, dont blame you for feeling despondant.

latenightowl · 06/10/2007 18:20

HI folks - (pops head round door)

Hi Lissie - glad to hear that you are okayish - must admit I have been lurking outside for a while but couldnt work out if I was bad enough for the hut or not......

No TTC for me this month as just had mega row with DP and no chance of making up as Im a TV sporting widow this weekend and even Jordan or some other pg 3 girl will not be able to tear him away from the tv this wkend - anyone else in a similar boat?

Must admit that Ive been over on another net as the MN threads were all too positive and too much BFP or optimism about TTC. So been wallowing in pity on the IVF world net and making myself feel better (sadly) that others are having just as bad a time of it as us! something about solidarity there I feel....

Anyway I noticed that the hut has been more "active" in the last week or so. Do you think this is to do with summer leaving us. If so then I think next year we should have an open air hut - maybe some sort of picnic for all us FTCs to encourage more participation. BTW does this hut have a woodburner or something to keep it warm for the next few months?? or we could be part of those gastly people who create santa grottos in late Oct/nov!! what do you reckon duchess?
LNO

lissiethevampireslayer · 06/10/2007 17:23

thanks, but hut graduates have special dispensation(sp). just dont go overboard.

it was tough, esp since my friend had her baby ON my edd.

sideways · 06/10/2007 17:21

I'm not too bad thanks.

I certainly wouldn't ever complain on this thread anyway, as I realise how lucky I am to have "graduated".

I'm glad you managed to get through your due date. I was thinking of you.

lissiethevampireslayer · 06/10/2007 17:14

dont worry about it im ok-ish, how are you?

sideways · 06/10/2007 17:08

Hi lissie. I have to apologise for not sending the stuff out to you. It is ready packaged up now and will be in the post next week, I promise. Sorry!

How are you doing?

lissiethevampireslayer · 06/10/2007 17:04

anyone around? that big, fat, overdue & p*ssed off thread keeps popping up in active convo's

lissiethevampireslayer · 06/10/2007 09:40

i back, if you fancy some of this in your coffee?

Original poster
duchesse · 06/10/2007 08:20

I am now. But you're probably not here any more now... We seem to be getting sloshed with a 12 hour time delay.

OP posts:
lissiethevampireslayer · 05/10/2007 21:39

oh duchesse, i rarely say this (because i wont always mean it, but in this case i do i so so badly wanted you to have a happy ending. are you around for some absinthe? think we both need it x

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