The Hut of Gl/Doom Part V- for the unapologetically despondent

no such thing as normal i'm afraid, but it is understandable!

Hello ladies, please help me as I think I am losing the plot. AF turned up and there was a part of me that was relieved. Is this normal after a mc?

not at all ronshar. i prefer the hut too!

I feel really scared that if I ever do get pregnant again I will have to leave this thread and I really like it here. Am I nuts?

Excellent idea to write to the health minister. Sometimes I feel as if we are battery hens and when our eggs fail they are discarded and we are sent back to try again. I wonder if animals mourne their young if they m/c. Probably. Maybe not hens though

Message withdrawn

F*ERS. Excuse my french but really it is too much.

It's even within hospitals. At homerton, MC no 3, the sonographers, EPAU nurses, nursey over in surgery were all fantastic. Lovely and caring and just great. Then, when I came round from the surgery, somewhere else where I'd never been, I was just turfed out into the cold. No-one followed up, spoke to me, anything.

I am not insane I'll have you know. I am crazy mind you! Its all this baby crap.

Herbaceaous, I am trying to draft a letter to Health minister to find out why we all get such bad treatment and also why each hospital has different protocols. Is it postcode lottery or real incompetance?
If anyone has any ideas send them my way and I shall crack on with a strongly worded letter.

Oh popsy. You're great. I too am going to stick my fingers up, in single and double formation, at being nice, tolerant and understanding about other people's farking pregnancies. Not our responsibility!

I reckon if we combined all our horror stories, we could start a campaign for better treatment of miscarrying women. It seems that while your baby is alive, the medical profession hardly leave you alone, but once it's died they couldn't give a toss. We're just the vessel, and they want us to keep quiet and not make too much mess.

p.s. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ladylush
and sorry for my festive emoticon crapness - things are still festive in popsyland

Hi everyone
herby great idea - desperate to meet you!! Feel like I know you already . Have met Ronny twice now and she's totally insane...JOKE ronny you know I love ya - we started at chapagne bar but moved to tea and cakes this time cos she is on the wagon oooh can see a mini ronny in my tea leaves and am coming over all wobbly I on the otherhand have resorted to a devil may care attitude - whereby anything in my body would be well and truly pickled - a year of ttc and being careful is just too much and I have to do something to try to take the edge off feeling CRAP all the time and and I suppose

To add to the EPU stories mine was so bad am still angry - they walked me through maternity to sign the "don't investigate it papers", then a few days later when I went back Dh wasn't allowed to sit with me (4 hours waiting for procedure on own in cold), I was given a male nurse, he spent time at bottom of my bed gossiping with other nurses about a pregnant colleague and her huge boobs, i was freezing cos not told to bring dressing gown, an anaesthatist gave me the pessary (I had to ask for it) and was excruciating and humiliating - guessing she had never done it before ("well you're bleeding now"..NO SHIT SHERLOCK), they forgot to weigh me, tag me or take any notes (I have a heart condition), I could hear everything that was going on in cubicle next to me (poor woman) and she could of course hear mine, i was just outside theatre so could hear eveything going on in there...the list goes on - was a F*cking farce - i was going to say men not treated like that but after DHs time at hozzy this week am not so sure - they just lump everything gyno together with no thought of us as people

popsy starts breathing into a paperbag and reminds herself to move on ha bloody ha
After a week with four announcements from close friends I am cancelling weekend with friend with 2 little'uns and spending weekend wit DH in various states of relaxation ...anyone for a TFI Friday G&T...clink fiz....squeeze of lemon...ahhhhhhh

Soosy that is terrible

Ronshar, it was a nice relaxing day thanks Agree - we would make an interesting bunch

Happy Birthday for yesterday Ladylush.
I met popsy for Champagne a little while back and yes I completely agree we should all gather there for more Champagne and teeth gnashing. We would all make a very interesting bunch!!!

After my ERPC, in the recovery room, the nurse told me to shut up, because started crying. Luckily they discovered my mc in the ACU and I didn't need to go to maternity. The EPU is now with the ACU, which can sometimes cause it's own problems....

Thanks for all the birthday wishes and virtual champagne - I virtually glugged it I would defo be up for meeting up at that St P champagne bar as I haven't been yet and have been wanting to go.

happy birthday ladylush!!!!

You really do feel that it can't be beyond the wit of man to separate out the two, don't you? I mean, if a GYN and an OB really need to talk to each other, they have legs to walk to a different section of the hospital.
Confession: when I was heavily pregnant I was trying to find the maternity suite and it was very badly signposted. To my shame I ended up wandering into the nasty-gynaecological investigation ward by mistake. A lovely nurse ushered me out quickly and she was obviously very concerned about her patients and the fact that they really wouldn't want to see me. I couldn't help thinking though that every time they left the ward to get a drink or a paper they would have to see the maternity section on the same corridor and go past all the excited relatives come for visiting.

Was just thinking that at my local hospital the EPU is in gynae which is completely separate to the maternity unit so presumably easier not to cause the same insensitve mistakes. However, I have just remembered that when I was in hospital before having dd (I was admitted about 5 days before having her as we were having issues) and about to be induced I was sharing a room with a lady who had, I think, lost all her waters at quite a late stage, although such that the baby wouldn't survive. SHe was going to have to deliver the baby and was sharing a room with me. OK, I wasn't in a great position as my baby's life was at risk but I was 37 weeks and about to be induced.

She did demand to be moved to a private room which she got -thank god.

Oh, and happy birthday ladylush. Oh, and popsy! I love the St P champagne bar, if you can get a seat. And if someone else is paying! Maybe we should all meet up there for a mass wailing and knashing of teeth...

Some people are lovely and kind and considerate, and you want to cry into their ample bosom. Some are crass, insensitive jobsworths who treat you like an inconvenience. I suppose it's like that in real life, too, but you'd hope that the latter type wouldn't see the health service as their vocation.

Happy Birthday ladylush, champers for your birthday here.

I have to say that I'm like Wheely, I had good treatment, both here and in Germany where the mc was confirmed (although the doc didn't speak english she was kind). I honestly thought things had progressed enough that medical staff had sensitivity to those going through a mc or difficulty conceiving now but obviously not.

It's extraodinary, isn't it. Despite the 'pregnancy going wrong' area being right next to the 'happy pregnancies and sweet tots' bit, they still haven't sorted out a system of stopping your 'congratulations on being pregnant' ante-natal literature being sent out after you've had a miscarrriage. In the 'going wrong' area. Right next to the 'happy mums...' bit. I've had it happen twice now. Both times I've kicked up a right stink.

Happy Birthday Ladylush ! Have some champagne on me.

These stories are terrible. I was so lucky to have sensitive treatment although I only went into the EPU for a scan and no follow up so there wasn't much chance of them being insensitive. Its terrible though that i have to class myself as 'lucky' to have good treatment.