Over 40 TTC - lots of baby dust for us...3!

I'm feeling a bit nervous joining in as I feel like a fraud.
My coil is being taken out today.
It's taken me until 40 to find someone that is willing to try with me. I've no idea what I'm doing, I just know my age is an issue. I've been taking folic acid and iron. Cut down on coffee, given up alcohol and I'm trying to lose weight.
I'm 40. No DC.
Feels like my last chance at being a Mum.
It's all about the support for each other isnt it?
Nice to meet you!

EvelineUK, thank you for your response. I use the ava bracelet for tracking temps so it's quite reliable as don't have awkwardness of sticking to take same times or sleeping consistantly with mouth open / closed etc, I found that way too stressful! Temps always sustain too, so it's definitely ovulation, could LH be wrong? Does LH set up change in old age?

waves

Hello, I lost you all for a while, the old thread wasn't showing in my threads I'm on. I'm still here, still trying, last month was a bit hopeless though. AF last week so counting down to fertile week, not sure whether to try OPKs or temping again, found it a bit confusing really and adds to the pressure to DTD at the "right time".

Anyway stats:
Lexilooo age 40, DC 0, ttc since Oct 2018.

That's six months so I guess it is time to think about going to the GP and getting checked out 😔

Mimosa - glad to hear af has finally appeared. You are certainly not alone, I have had my struggles with my cycles. I've started taking progesterone in the 2ww but without it my LP is now only 9 days. That's not good. Clomid didn't really do much for me but I suspect it's given me cysts as I've had twinges in my right overy since taking it. Just really hoping it doesn't screw up this next cycle (currently cd4)
Also just found out my sister is currently menopausing, she's just turned 44, so that's not a good sign for me genetically. She is weirdly happy about it as she never wanted kids, and it takes away the inconvenience of monthly periods and contraception. I'm the total opposite. I am so not ready for this

Is no-one else struggling with irregular cycles by the way? Not that I hope anyone is....I just feel a bit alone in all this.

Hi all, thanks Sparrow for the new thread.
Russ - I was so sad to read about your loss. That is so so cruel. I hope you’re getting chance to rest and grieve. Hugs.

Mellon - you’ve been through a huge trauma, it’s no wonder you’re getting flashbacks. I agree with Chat that some counseling would be good for you. Hugs to you too.

AFM - AF finally showed up after a stupidly long cycle of 90+ days. AF has been pain free and normal but I suspect the hot flashes are on their way back. It’s a pattern now. Get AF then they start towards the end of bleeding. My poor old ovary is struggling to produce oestrogen:( low oestrogen = no ovulation. Just lost with it all low. My specialist just said it’s stress related but it’s got to be waning hormones. Get my blood results this week and scan in three weeks. Not that I expect any of that to shed any light on my issues.
I’ve ordered progesterone cream in a vain attempt to balance things out but I can’t start it until after ovulation if it decides to happen. Apparently progesterone wanes faster than oestrogen in our 40s with the effect that oestrogen then dominates for part of your cycle then comes crashing down at other points. My hormones are definitely crashing up and down so I’m hoping the progesterone will help to balance things out. Sigh. Deep sigh.

Keep the faith ladies. I conceived with one cycle for both girls at 43 and 45.

@KristieP2018..lol thanks, I appreciate it 😁

@booseysmom I’ll definitely call you boosey from now on

@KristieP2018.. I love that you call me Boosey! That's what I always called my DS when he was a baby and it stuck! Yes it seems that way (that they're useless) .they just hope you'll get fed up of waiting and being fobbed off and just go away. The thing is we can't all afford to go private but that's the only way to guarantee quicker appointments. I don't see any point in going to them about my issues as I already know what they'll say but I'm actually terrified of feeling like this every month now .there's just no solution to any of it

They just don’t want to listen boosey. We have a letter from the fertility clinic saying they’ll give us an appointment is August. August?! FFS they did his sperm analysis in February and we had to wait 2 months for those results. Now you want us to wait another 3! They are useless!

I hope they listen to you boosey xx

@Constance1234 & @KristieP2018... thank you both. I might have to get an appointment tomorrow to see if i can find out what's going on. The problem is I know they'll say to have the coil fitted and/or hrt but last time I refused saying we were ttc. How much longer can i go on saying this though really?!

CD 1 again here. @Booseysmom, that sounds like my cycle a couple of months ago. It’s was so heavy and painful I wondered but never tested.

Hope everyone is enjoying bank holiday today.

Is anyone currently in the process or about to do IVF? Seriously considering it now as last chance saloon. Those that have done it did you do multicycle?

Will check in properly tomorrow, we're away in signal is a little pants... hope all is ok, af over just and hubs and I trying to dtd on a sofa bed was a funny and uncomfortable sight... sending loads of baby dust to all xx

BooseysMom sorry you are having such an awful time - do you think it'd be worth taking a test now, as I know from having a miscarriage that HCG stays in your body for a while? I guess at least you would know either way. Hope things start to feel better soon, I know what you mean about the emotional side being worse x

SomnolentSekhmet I had a miscarriage at 9 weeks last year too, it's a horrible thing to happen, and I'm sorry it has happened to you. I'm sure there is a good egg hiding in there somewhere! It's hard when you are older, as you don't have much time to grieve, you just feel you need to start trying straightaway!

Welcome @SomnolentSekhmet.. good to have you on board...You can stop lurking now! Sorry to hear about your mc. Remember you are even more fertile now..there's def a good egg in there for you! Good luck & baby dust x

Ladies, you are not gonna believe this and part of me wishes I'd tested and part of me is glad I didn't..but I think I'm having a v early mc. I felt really strange a couple weeks ago, nauseas and weak and very emotional and broody when I held a new baby of the family..everyone thought I was preg! Then i started AF 1 day over due date and it's vile with alot of pain and clots (sorry tmi). So could it be a mc I wonder??

Hello ladies. I thought I'd finally stop lurking and actually join you now. I've just found out I've had a MMC at 9 weeks although the baby was measuring small all along so I wasn't super hopeful of a good outcome and hoping to start trying again asap. I'm 42 (as of a couple of weeks ago) and took 6 cycles to get pregnant so hoping there's a good egg hiding in there somewhere. I've got 2 daughters, 15 and 3. Wishing everybody in the 2ww good luck :)

@Constance1234.. Ah, thank you! It's evil this time so currently laid up at home. I can't even talk to anyone when i get this..the emotional side of it can often be worse than the physical.
How's your weekend going?
Hope everyone has a lovely bank hol x

BooseysMom Thank you.
Sorry to hear AF has arrived. I think we all know the crushing feeling of disappointment that that brings :(
Hope you’ve managed to have an ok weekend nonetheless x

Welcome and baby dust to @Constance1234

AF has landed ladies..very painful so far. I'm out

Hope everyone ok. How are you Russ? x

Great, thanks constance

That’s interesting I did not know that it could fluctuate. I was told that AMH should be compared with FSH and LH to give a good picture of what’s going on. I’ll send you a message with his details. It cost £400 for the initial appointment including a scan, and follow ups are £150. So not cheap, but way less expensive than IVF :)

I don't think FSH is that reliable to be honest, I had mine checked when I was 40 with the GP, it was 10.4, checked it again 6 months later and it was 18.4, then about 10 months later (after 2 mc) it was 10.2, so not very consistant.

At the clinic the scans showed I had ovulated but no details on weather it looked any good or not. The first scan showed small cysts which were gone by the second scan (the next cycle) I had 8 follicles both times.

Your consultant sounds great, I'd love to see someone who specialises in the older person. Where is he based?