Over 40 TTC - lots of baby dust for us...3!

Congrats karryk

Kimm - what was your AMH number? What did they say to you?

@Karryk congratulations that’s fab news!

@Kimm123 what was your result? My understanding is that amh shows quantity of eggs left and not quality. You can have a good amh, but still not be able to get pregnant. And its definitely still possible to get pregnant on a low amh. Please remind me if you have any children? And how old you are?

As for me, my baby was due yesterday, so feeling quite sorry for myself, especially as we haven’t even had a sniff of a bfp since. 😢

Hi ladies...I've just had amh result back...and its very low ovarian reserve. .im sooo upset...i think ive got no chance now....and advice as in were to go from here.....definitely not DE....

Hello ladies....just wanted to share some tentative good news....passed the first big milestone - had my 12 week scan this morning and there's definitely a baby in there and it was having a little wiggle. I'm going to allow myself a few hours of peace before descending back into paranoia

If all goes well I'll be a jolly 42.5 when bub arrives xx

The pregnant young mums

There seem to be so many bumps around but yes the young mums smoking outside school 😡

Catconfusion - seems so unfair doesn't it. Why do they get this opportunity and we don't? There's no logic, but it riles me

@Cleozeta no you are definitely not alone. Sometimes people just rub us up the wrong way. I can definitely see how her being pregnant would trigger you.

A friend of a friend had a similar affect on me. She always used to say such horrible negative things about her partner and how she'll leave him one day. Also just very abrupt and difficult to get on with. She's now pregnant and due next month, the same day our baby we had the mmc with was due. Annoying she's run a marathon which she took up weight training while pregnant to do. Also did one of those muddier challenges while pregnant. It really wound me up because we were so careful and lost our baby. Also we have a very good relationship so a much stabler home to bring a baby into.

I guess baby loss and infertility doesn't pick people based on being careful or ready. xx

Happy birthday catconfusion, and good luck to you. Loving the optimism

Hmmm - great stamina! Good work

Does anyone else find themselves getting unfairly angry at random people? (Behind closed doors obvs)
There is this woman in our village who I'm not too keen on, she's just arrived and she only talks about work, and walks like a bloke. Irrational dislike from the beginning (unlike me as I normally like everyone!) And now I find out she's sodding pregnant with her 3rd child. 1st 2 same age as mine, and she's no spring chicken. Maybe slightly younger than me, but not massively. I'm fuming, and I'd love nothing more than to slap her.
This is so unlike me! I think all this failed ttc is finally tipping me over the edge!!! 🤣
Please tell me I'm not alone in this!!!

Hi everyone, it was my 40th birthday on Sunday so I officially come under the umbrella of this thread. I have to say it didn’t feel as bad as I thought it did after my mmc in Feb and mc in March. The meltdown didn’t come and instead I had a lovely day with plenty of optimism we will conceive our first child. My last cycle was anovulatory and 43 days long but I feel like my body needed that and is still recovering somewhat. I’m currently cd 12 and using Ovusense to track temps. I look at my chart every Sunday to avoid stress. We’re awaiting a fertility appointment to hopefully try Clomid if my cycles are still irregular. I have mild pcos but usually ovulate on my own just late.

Anyway I’m looking forward to being part of this thread! Xx

Checking in

Going for it this month and dtd every day during FW. CD15 today and still no smiley but have been dtd last 4 days. Hope dh still has energy when smiley appears 😂

How's everyone doing? Is it only Wednesday 😱😱😱😱

Hey @karryk...how far u gone

@Naturebelle I haven't had a private consultation but I follow her on Instagram and I get the email info... she is lovely

@Naturebelle yes, the positive stories really help - I try to seek them out and hope we're on the good side of statistics

@cleozeta - thank you for your kind words! I'm sorry you are having a tough time at the moment yourself. Even though my situation is different, that feeling of helplessness just consumes. I bought some rescue remedy to help my low mood, it did help. My period finally decided to show itself (& the obligatory tummy pain!) so I feel a bit better, never thought I'd say that about period pain. Re:donor sperm, I'm not sure if this is the route yet. I'd ideally like to share having a baby with someone else, but don't want to let that stop me if it doesn't happen in the next year or so.

@chatbash72 thank you! I'm not sure if I'll go down the donor route, I'd ideally like to meet someone, but who knows what the future holds on that front, it's not easy to meet someone who's on the same page as you!

@BooseysMom thank you! So many women these days are having children in their early 40's, I just hear so much negativity of how difficult it can be after 40, that it psychologically makes you feel anxious and defeated. It's like a biological switch is flipped as the clock turns midnight on your 40th birthday. I have no illusions it's all positivity, and I understand it's not easy, but hearing positive stories keeps me feeling that way.

I'm thinking of booking a consultation with Emma Cannon, as I like the sound of her approach. Has anyone booked with her at all? If so, any feedback?

Chat... no judgement here! Both my boys are at private school. If you have a great state school near you then that’s wonderful, but not all of us are lucky enough to have that. x

@Naturebelle.. Welcome and thank you for your lovely msg. I had DS at 40, just three months off 41. You have every chance..good luck & baby dust x

@MaryShelley1818..We went to a summer fete yesterday and it was so hot we couldn't sit out for long. What shade there was was taken by cars! Hope you have a lovely weekend. Cooler today thank goodness!

Chat.. sorry AF got you. Lol to men's group! I can't imagine it either 😁

Well after a few odd days af hit with vengeance in the early hours... had an odd day talking to dh and we were talking about sending the kids to private school ( no judgement please) it's our old school where we met.. but it means a good few years of hard graft for starters... but I think that as it's not happened yet dh hasn't factored it into his thoughts.. more babies. I do think that's a man thing.. they just have to dtd and produce sperm don't think they are that much fussed about anything else that or think about it or obsess about it like we do... really can't imagine them on a dads group talking about spermatozoon strength, or supplements to improve its quality 🤣🤣🤣🤣
However he still enjoys the benefits of contraceptive free dtd so hard graft preggers it is... 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞 not giving up hope... first day of the next cycle !!!

lots of love to you all 💕💕
@Naturebelle so you have a particular person in mind for the next step on your path it will you be looking at sperm donation ? My youngest I had at 40 my sis had hers a 41.. xxx

Welcome to the new ladies 👋🏻

Seems like everyone is feeling a bit down in the dumps and defeated! I’ve stopped bleeding since my CP so trying to dust myself down and be positive for the start of a new cycle, I’m under no illusions that time is running out but I’m not ready to give up hope yet.

What’s everyone up to this sunny weekend? DH has gone on a very rare day/evening out with his friends for a nice meal and some drinks. Ive taken the tiny terror for a look around a Pet Shop, bought him some new summer clothes, and treated him to a Happy Meal! Just chilling out tonight as we’re off to York tomorrow for a night and going to the Wildlife Park on Monday.

Rose - house move is looking to happen in the next few months so will be a good distraction for a short while, but same as you, we will now have a spare room - with no one to fill it

Welcome naturebelle.
My periods started to change at 39, although now, in hindsight I do think it was down to stress. Things have stabalised since, but I do have high FSH and low AMH with only 8 follicles. Over 2 years ttc (since around my 40th birthday) nothing to show but a mmc and a cp.
My advice is, if you want to do this on your own, don't wait around. Were you thinking of doner sperm IUI?
Once you get to 40 things do get harder and your chances get lower, egg quality declines massively, so chances of misscariages if you are lucky enough to get a bfp, are very high. As you may have read, a few of us here are starting to accept it's too late and time is up, I certainly am, at 42.
Best of luck to you, at this stage - you still have time

Hello ladies, I've been lurking and feel a bit of a fraud as I'm not TTC, yet anyway, or over 40 (again, yet). I'm 39, 40 next year and not in a relationship. I've been anxious about whether I'll be able to conceive, so I went to fertility clinic last Feb (when I was 1 month off 38) and my egg count was ok, 16 follicles AMH of 17.4 (I believe these aren't anything to majorly worry about). Fast forward to now, I'm still not in a relationship, the big 4-0 is looming, my work has been v stressful the last few weeks, and I'm also anxious over other life changes (potential redundancy, buying a house), suffice to say I'm not in a great place. And my period was due this week, it came 3 days earlier and hasn't really been anything, very light. This is unusual as normally it gets v heavy, yet not this time, so of course I panic that I'm going through early menopause. I am a bit depressed, given all what's currently going on, which doesn't help.
I know this is only 1 period, but I am a worrier and so wondered if any of you had experienced this and it was down to stress? I also think that as I'm not currently in a relationship, time is flying by and I wonder if having a baby will ever happen. I've not really had much luck in the relationship dept, and didn't want to have a child on my own, but that might be the option. Also, what are your thoughts on surrogacy?
Sorry for the v long post! I love reading your posts and want to thank you ladies for the care and support you give each other, it helps me see reason at a time when I'm struggling with it. :-)

Thank you all for your kind understanding comments, it's so nice to have somewhere I can let off steam, where people get it.
It can be so all consuming and disheartening.

Love the Alanis Morisette link, I used to love her music, good to see she's had success at 44. I wonder how she did it, as she states in her interview that she had to 'look at other avenues'. Doner egg perhaps?

Ooh ladies..... keep positive whilst we are all still ovulating we are still in the game.... it just might take a while... but we'll get there.. lisa Faulkner on Chris Evans breakfast show was just emotional. I know she has adopted but listening to her ivf story and the whole consuming focus we put on ourselves and our bodies was Interesting to listen to.. dip in on emma cannon on Instagram... everyday she posts very encouraging words and advice... highly recommended it for positivity
Sending lots of love and positive vibes 💕💕💕💕