TTC First Baby - Thread 16!!

@tropicana1 the AF symptoms are totally normal. I felt like I was having the biggest period of my life in the first few days after BFP and distinctly remember the cramping as it kept me up at night! And I'm still lurking on here at 25 weeks, I must be the biggest fartiest smell ever! Just like to see how everyone is doing 😁 this board pretty much kept me sane during ttc.
@mrsEG hey! Aw thank you, it's just one of those things, aparently it's the most common thing to have to go in with and get checked out - but much rather be safe than sorry. I think I was more daunted about DH being away! I can't believe I'll be 26 weeks tomorrow, I am due on the 9th August. Its just flown through the 2nd trimester I'll be in the 3rd soon! Argh!
@fivebyfive2 WOW that looks amazing!!! Enjoy!! I would say, do whatever you feel ok doing. If you want to hold off on getting things then do, it's totally understandable after the MC. If you want to get excited, then let yourself! Im sure there's no right or wrong, and if you aren't superstitious then there's no reason to hold off from being excited about what is wonderful news. The future will be whatever it will be. Enjoy the now!

@Fivebyfive2 Hotel looks lovely! I was the same so know exactly how you feel - I didn’t want to buy anything, kept thinking I’d be tempting fate. This time around (🤞🏻) I’m going to hang on to 8 weeks as I’ll be entitled to an early scan, before buying anything. As and when it happens, it’ll probably be the longest few weeks of my life!!

@Tropicana1 Yep sounds about right, I remember my uterus felt like it was pulling / twisting! Mint tea is really good for the bloat :)

@MrsEG thanks 😊 I've had some really intense AF style cramping on and off all day which had me worried and running to the toilet every 5 minutes to see if I was just getting AF, but Dr google seems to say it's fairly normal? Quite surprised by the intensity of it though and i think it's adding to the whole not feeling real thing because I just keep expecting AF to arrive. It's turned into like a dull throbbing ache now in my lower back and uterus. Other than that just super bloated!

@Fivebyfive2 wow that looks amazing!! Enjoy your weekend!

@Crossfitgirl Hello again lovely! Sorry to read you had a scare but delighted to hear all is going well! When are you due now? The names are lovely! Kept to the secret confines of Mumsnet!! My best friends little girl is Jessica, you don’t hear it as much these days it’s lovely! And Olivia is beautiful too.

@Marleym28 I was very very gassy, burping for me! And bloated, from around 12DPO. Only real tell tale any earlier than that for me was really sore nipples!

@Tropicana1 Please do stick around! The rest of us need some of your guys good luck :) How are you feeling?

@Bettythecat I don’t know much about short luteal phases but mine are between 12-14DPO, so not enormously long either and I’ve fallen pg twice. Sadly MC both but it goes to show I can definitely get pg! As others have said, I am sure you’ll be fine :) (Although I hated it when I was younger - no sooner was one AF done and I was on to the next one!!)

How is everyone doing today, looking forward to the bank hols I hope? I feel wretched today, full of a cold and a little light headed. Just had a bag of Percy Pigs for dinner!!

@Tropicana1 thanks lovely that's good to know too. Seems it's more common than you think.

@Crossfitgirl @FlapJackered thanks so much that's actually really reassured me. I had obviously diagnosed myself with a luteal phase defect and already ordered a bumper tub of vitamin C supplements which apparently help 🤦‍♀️. Sends you half mad this lark. @Crossfitgirl it must have been so scary when she stopped moving about but so glad all was well- I suppose it's one anxiety after the next isn't it! @FlapJackered I know what you mean about thinking it's a fluke. I've done the same thinking my BFP was just a one off and I'll be one of those women who never manages to stay pregnant. I'm sure that won't be the case for either of us though- got to keep plodding and those babies will never know how much hard work and stress it took to get them here!!

@Marleym28 I am the most bloated I've ever been in my life and very gassy (farty) if that helps you in any way 😂

@Bettythecat I also have a short LP - 10 days usually and got my BFP yesterday on 11dpo the day af was due so although I had worried myself reading about it it didn't actually cause me an issue.

Sorry for hanging around like a bad smell! I don't quite feel "ready" for the pregnancy board yet as it's not quite hit me!

Hello - quick q for those of you clever ladies that take / know a lot about supplements - does anyone know much about ubiquinol / CoQ10? Is this one of the main things that people take in addition to the usual pregnacare style multi vit? I see it recommended a lot for slightly older women, or those who have unexplained infertility, as it improves egg quality apparently, but don't see it a lot in the general list of extra supplements people take when ttc. Could it be beneficial (or at very least not harmful) for anyone TTC? Or do you think it's one of those things that there's not much point bothering with unless you know you have an egg issue?

@bettythecat my luteal phase was never longer than 11 days and some cycles was 9 or 10. There's no evidence to say its a problem, I was convinced when ttc that it was though - I always ovulated really late in the cycle and had 3 days of spotting prior to my period so thought I must have low progesterone. But actually I conceived and have read loads of threads on here of people conceiving with short LPs. In theory, there is less time for the egg to implant, but it seems to just be in theory as there's no evidence saying it would stop you hence why the NHS don't deem it an issue. It's a very speculative topic, I read loads on it when ttc and nothing seemed concrete. I wouldnt let it worry you too much xxx

PG ladies...

Gross question- when you felt gassy, was that more Burpy or farty?

@Bettythecat I think 10 is still considered normal but I do know short luteal phases and spotting can often mean low progesterone. I am sure your body is just taking a while to get back to normal. My cycles are still not back to normal and I have got terrible skin. I think it just takes a bit of time.
You might be right re ovulating late. I just thought that the eggs are older and not as fresh, but that is me speculating really, as it's the only thing that doesn't seem right with me. 🙈

Thanks @Crossfitgirl Fingers crossed! It just seemed like the bfp was a massive fluke and I can't imagine it happening again but perhaps it is normal to feel like that. It feels good to have an appointment booked! I think DH could do with having his swimmers checked again as it was a while ago now!
Sorry to hear about your hospital visit, that must have been really scary. It's just one worry after another from ttc to pregnancy and I am sure for the 18 years after! 😂

@starkid gosh no idea...I guess it's 8 including the months I was actually pg so let's go with that?!

Another general questions ladies- anyone know anything about short luteal phases? Mine is generally 11 or 12 days which is on the short side but this latest cycle seems to be 10 since I've started spotting today when was due on Saturday. I hear it's a bad sign but thinking the mc maybe messed me up.

@fivebyfive2 I'm doing good thanks, feel like I'm having far less pregnancy related problems that lots of others so I'm v grateful. Had a scare the other night with no movements for half a day, had to go to maternity Assessment at 10pm on my own as DH is away! Luckily all was fine, and they said naughty little madam was laid completely sideways, hip to hip, prob why I couldnt feel her legs kicking!

@validuser it's a secret but mumsnet doesn't count. We love Olivia, so top names is Olivia Anne (Anne is both our mums middle names), but got an agreement with DH that if baby comes on his late father's birthday her middle name will be Ronnie after him, so it would be Jessica Ronnie. (but I prefer Olivia but it doesn't go as well with Ronnie!) I'm gonna try shortlist a few more, and a boys one just in case!!

@flapjackered @bettythecat those therapists sound positively terrible!!! Imagine comparing to people worse off. Who gives a fuck. Your problems are your own and it makes it no less painful hearing that some other poor sod is worse off.
@flapjackered sorry the doc said its back to square one, that must have been hard to hear. Think positive though, if a BFP means no fertility clinic then I'm sure it must be a positive sign that successful pregnancy is possible for you naturally, maybe it was just very bad luck that it took a while and this time wasnt meant to be. Good on you for booking privately though, it must feel great to have some control back and have some experts look into everything for you, hopefully they can give you the absolute best chance possible and give you the best advice, even if it's to support the pregnancy once you've got there yourself! I think I'd be doing the same in your situation.
@rose555 I loved complimentary therapies when ttc, it was so nice to just have some you time. I had fertility reflexology and it was lovely and relaxing. Xxx

@FlapJackered that's such a bullshit response from your doctor!! Seems so unnecessarily harsh to make you wait 2 years from your MC and ignore all the time and heartache it took to get to that pregnancy!

@Bettythecat - Glad to see you back, but not in the circumstances of course. What cycle would you like me to put you down as on the list?

@FlapJackered - good idea going private if it really is a 2 year wait! Good luck xx

@sophwolf @mrsH497 @fivebyfive2 @mrspandigital huge congrats to you all I’m so happy for you what a day!x

@dahlia123 @cupcakesandglitter thank you both I’m nervous for lap but need answers. Hope you both doing ok x

@hannah192 thank you I’m so glad to have someone in similar situation will be good to chat through our journey good luck x

@keyboard91 sorry you got a bfn x

@MrsEG me too! Forgot to mention that one - I’ve been on the pineapple core and Brazil nuts too.... fingers crossed for us!

@Bettythecat @FlapJackered what dreadful therapists!! I think I must have gotten lucky with mine as she just lets me sit and ramble - she also told me she had a MC herself a few years ago and I think this helps enormously as she knows how it feels. I also hate when people ask if you’re trying - especially given that we have actually been quite open about our MCs. So people who know what we’ve been through still think it’s okay to say ‘So are you trying again?’ Like It’s not a sprained ankle!! @FlapJackered I’m 3DPO today, usually have a 28 day cycle so just playing the waiting game! Won’t be getting my hopes up, just trying to while the time away and see what happens.

@rose555 The acupuncture sounds great - I tried to book some but the waiting lists near me for a fertility specialty were crazy! If this cycle is unsuccessful though I’ll be looking in to it again. I have tried the pineapple core and Brazil nut theory this month though!! Like you say - i’ll Try anything at this stage!!

@FlapJackered p.s. that counsellor sounds hopeless- comparing different levels of mc is seriously not helpful 🙄. It's mad all the things people say when you are TTC with no awareness of how it feels. It's like the classic "when are you thinking of trying" when you're like "well actually we have been desperately trying for months and I've just had a miscarriage" and actually you say "oh I don't know, sometime 😬".

@FlapJackered I've actually just got off the phone to my mum and she said exactly the same thing about trying not to stress! I told her very politely that actually it's an old wives tale and there have been zero studies linking the two things 🤦‍♀️. I ovulated quite late this month too (CD 23)...I didn't realise that was an issue. What's the story there? 👀 Pre-MC I have tended to ovulate more like CD 13-20 though but had sort of thought later was better since the egg has more time to mature?! That's probably rubbish though.

@Bettythecat I can't believe your therapist said that! I went to one counselling session after my mc and while it was helpful in some ways, but she told me did I know that stress can affect fertility and I went onto argue with her that there are no significant studies which show stress affects it at all 😂 She also said I only mc'd at 8 weeks and some people mc at 20+ and that putting into perspective would help 🤦🏼‍♀️
My sister has had some treatments at Zita west apparently they are amazing, just a bit pricier than others apparently.
I have had day 3 and day 21 tests and DH has had a SA too. Nothing major showed up but I ovulate quite late in my cycle so I think there may be an issue there. Hopefully they will find it at the private clinic.

@MrsEG it it so unfair isn't it, it just feels like a kick while you're already on the floor. 😢
I burst into tears at the doctor so she threw some routine bloods at me to stop me crying! 😂 so I have another thyroid etc test next week, which is something I suppose as I feel my hypothyroid symptoms creeping back. What cd are you on now?

@bettythecat I’m the same... I’ve thrown so much more money at it this month and my DH looks at me funny 😂 this month I have upped the ante and bought Ava, Pre-Seed, Acupuncture, Massage and Wild Nutrition Food Grown Fertility supplements. A fortune all in all!!!!! But worth it if it works. The acupuncture was interesting. She put needles in lots of different places - hands, arms, feet, legs, forehead and three across my uterus area with a warm lamp on it. She asked me lots about diet, cycles etc too and suggested I might want to have some tests done due to my periods having become much more painful over past 5 or 6 months. The process itself was odd. Some needles and some areas of my body didn’t hurt at all, or feel anything. Others (my left arm in particulate) felt really pulled / tight and mildly painful while the needles were in. She left me for 20 mins or so to relax once the needles were all in. I felt like I could feel something in the right side of my pelvis but honestly I couldn’t tell if that was placebo / or just because I was given the time and peace and quiet to listen so hard to my body that I was hearing things that happen all the time and that I normally just ignore. I did feel very relaxed by the end of it and kind of floated home 😂 my next session is the Monday after next, and she said I should come weekly for a couple of cycles at first. So all in all, I think it’s probably too early to tell anything right now, but the more I read about it the more acupuncture seems to be recommended by so many sources... so I’m going to stick with it for a while.

@MrsEG yes it really was the worst thing. A couple of days after the news I just couldn't get out of bed I was so upset and the D&C itself was also completely traumatic. I was seeing a therapist for general anxiety before but when I told her about my anxiety over TTC she basically said I just needed to chill out and relax and it would happen which as you know is not a helpful thing to say to someone TTC so I have kind of given up on her!

@Fivebyfive2 hello lovely one I wondered if it was you but with a slightly different name?? I was secretly hoping your BFP might be a good omen for me too since we tracked each other last time but sadly not. Huge congratulations to you I hope it all goes perfectly for you this time. How have your symptoms been?

@FlapJackered that sounds useful and agree you need someone who is a bit of an all rounder. I've had a look at Zita West before who kind of takes a holistic approach with diet, accupuncture, therapy etc which sounds intriguing. Have you had any tests already? Sorry I'm sure you've said this lots before.

@rose555 thanks lovely 💜. How did you find your acupuncturist if you don't mind me asking? Can you tell I'm willing to throw a load of money at the issue at this point 😂. I told DH I was thinking of trying it last night and he looked at me like I'd gone mad. I know a lot of people who have used it for TTC and other things and loved it so worth a try I reckon.

@rose555 I’ve been using Ava for the first time this month too! I am only 3DPO today but my chart seems as I’d hope at the mo, with the drops for ovulation and now climbing back up. I have heard you can get an ‘implantation dip’ in temp, so as you say it doesn’t necessarily mean bad news!

@Bettythecat It’s horrible, the most awful thing I’ve ever experienced, I have actually been in counselling since which has really helped. Hope you are feeling better soon x

@flapjackered How awful they put you back to square one - I was told similar that as I had 2MCs they won’t do fertility tests on the NHS. It’s bloody ridiculous. If we get to June we’re going to go private too.