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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!

986 replies

Laney79 · 24/03/2019 10:09

Hey ladies, we were nearing the limit on thread 28 so here's a new one.

Roll Call...

Name: Laney79
Age: 39
TTC: #1 since autumn 2017.
2 losses - MMC discovered March 2018, MMC discovered Sept 2018 both at what should've been 9 weeks, bean and bow measured 6 weeks.

@Lilimum6 @Russkispy @Catconfusion @Boboelephant @fnej01 please tag and pass on!

OP posts:
Thread gallery
51
Catconfusion · 01/04/2019 08:39

Good luck @ale2992 for when you do!

ale2992 · 01/04/2019 08:30

Still not tested! 13dpo and I haven't yet

AliceRR · 31/03/2019 22:59

@InDreamland

Hope your DH takes things a bit more seriously now. Hopefully now you have some answers you can work towards something that will work for you🤞

Hope Mothers’ Day has been gentle to you all

Catconfusion · 31/03/2019 20:51

Hi @MrsLBear I'm sorry for your loss.

I had an ERPC for mmc at 12 weeks, baby was 6/7 weeks on 4th Feb. I ovulated 4 weeks after the surgery (I normally ovulate 3/4 weeks after cd1) this was just over a week after my negative pregnancy test. I found out ten days later I was pregnant again on FRER. Unfortunately I started bleeding on 19th March so a chemical pregnancy. My cycle was therefore 43 days if day of surgery cd 1. My cycles are normally 5/6 weeks long so seemed normal length. AF was horrendous when it came. It was a mixture of the another loss and first bleed since surgery.

If you know when you got a negative test after surgery might give a clue to when you ovulated as usually about a week later. Maybe give it a few days and test again. Good luck and I hope that helps! Xx

MrsLBear · 31/03/2019 20:11

Also, thinking of everyone today who have had losses.
Really hits home ❤️

MrsLBear · 31/03/2019 20:10

Hi ladies 👋🏼

I've been off Mumsnet a while.
Had a MMC late January/early Feb and had EPRC on 21/2. Still waiting for af to come. Done 2 pg tests now and both have been negative. Wish I'd tracked ovulation now just so I had an idea when I should expect to come on. Not been using any protection so just letting nature take its course.
How long did it take you all to get back into a cycle?
Mine were normally around 33-36 days anyway but I'm not on cd38.

strawberrye · 31/03/2019 14:02

@moonpeace thanks for asking and sorry its taken so long to reply. I am finding things more difficult as time goes on, and whilst I continue to read the thread I've not posted as I don't really feel I have anything positive to contribute than self-pity! Having said that in answer to your question about acupuncture, I started having it about 6 weeks ago and am on my second cycle with acupuncture treatment. Don't know if it will help fertility wise but I figured it was worth a shot. I am finding it quite relaxing and my acupuncturist has also had recurrent miscarriage so I find some therapeutic benefit from that too as I really feel she "gets" what I am going through.

MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue · 31/03/2019 12:58

Sorry I've been crap at keeping up.

Just wanted to say I'm thinking of you all today. The mothers who didn't get to hold their babies and those whose babies were take too soon. Much love to you all xxx

Mistymeow · 31/03/2019 12:57

Happy Mother’s Day to you all! I’ve just bumped into my neighbours and met their 3 week baby, managed it surprisingly well. Basically adopted the manner in which I dote on my cat which seemed to work!

@moonpeace I’m going to try acupuncture once I’ve got some money together. I’m dubious it will do anything for fertility but I’m in it for the relaxation. I’m sure it was stress that messed up my cycles after the last miscarriage, and I don’t want that happening this time.
@laney79 sounds sensible in that cast to hold off on the pill. I feel like you need to have a consultation with a specialist to go through all your results. You need to know in clear terms because your GP is being unhelpful and it’s not good for your anxiety.

TinyPaws · 31/03/2019 12:43

@moonpeace I'm going to an initial acupuncture consultation on Wednesday!

moonpeace · 31/03/2019 11:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

InDreamland · 31/03/2019 10:48

@Frillyfarmer that's lovely. Enjoy your day with your LO.

Happy Mother's day to all of us!

I may not have my babies at home but they are in my heart.

Love to you all xxx

Frillyfarmer · 31/03/2019 08:35

I'm sending all of my love to every single one of you on this thread today. To all of us beautiful mothers without our babies. I'm incredibly lucky to have my yoghurt covered 18month old, and I'm just hoping that these next nine months of this year bring us all some good fortune xxxx

InDreamland · 30/03/2019 23:40

@ale2992 fx for this cycle. Hope the witch stays away.

@moonpeace AF after mc is such a head fuck. I'm wondering how many of us on here actually have normal periods now. 2 days is very short. Would it be crazy to hope that it's a bleed during pregnancy? DH I think is feeling bad now. I've been upset with him all day. He has his appointments booked so fx he can get treatment fast. I agree it's always put on the woman when often it is actually the men and their sperm.

@Laney79 I just want to give you lots of hugs. Your GP should refer you, mine did after my first mc, although I was under gynae fertility clinic before pregnancy due to not having conceived for 5 years. Could you go back and push for a referral? I'm hoping you will be a mum one day xxx

@Lilimum6 sorry I'm clueless with temping as i don't do it myself. Hope this month you still catch it though.

@Mistymeow thank you. He may have booked something for next weekend. He had so much making up to me to do. Fx for this cycle for you!

Felt so tearful today buying my mum's mother's day card. Saw one that said "First Mothers Day" on it and thought that should be me. I should have a 2 month old now or be 24 weeks pregnant. Life sucks.

Original poster
Laney79 · 30/03/2019 19:48

@moonpeace thanks, the FSH does help a little but I need to get my ovulation sorted. I'm also worried that this hormone imbalance could be the reason for my miscarriages - no one has ever even considered that in my case but a friend suggested it's worth looking at. I'll look into agnus castus but I'm so tempted to go back to basics to see if that helps.

@Lilimum6 my fella is not keen on the pill at all, but also not keen on spending lots of money on a specialist if we are likely to get fobbed off. I'm hoping the open eve at the fertility centre might help us come to a decision.

@TinyPaws I'm truly petrified but I'll try it. Fingers crossed it works for us both.

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Original poster
Laney79 · 30/03/2019 19:40

Thanks @Mistymeow - I'm more worried about the oestradiol prolactin and SHGB levels being so high and ovulating early, it really should be settling by now. My fear with the pill is that it will just make it worse, and stop me from ovulating, especially if my oestradiol levels are because I'm heading to early menopause like my sister. When I did stop the pill my periods were all over the shop so I don't feel confident it will help, and could just exacerbate.

I think I may go back to basics. The first time I caught I was only taking folic acid and vitamin D...so I think I'm may just ditch everything and go back to that. Taking coq10, pregnacare, not drinking at all has got me no where, so I tempted to pack it in and try and recreate my situation from 18 months ago.

OP posts:
Mistymeow · 30/03/2019 17:19

@lilimum6 agree with Tinypaws, looks like the 27th is the right one. Fingers crossed!
@indreamland so glad dh is finally taking it seriously with the appointments, you need him to be proactive. I hope you get your second birthday dinner soon, you deserve it! But very positive he’s taking these steps.
@laney79 I can understand your frustration. It does seem that your test results are normal from what your doctor has said and it is very positive news that your egg reserve is good. I guess from their perspective you are ovulating regularly and you have conceived twice, and they probably have put your miscarriages down to age (which is awful, I’ve been told that myself twice). I wonder if it might be an idea to try the pill to regulate your cycles as lilimum6 has said, before going down more invasive and expensive testing that might cause you more stress? I know it’s counterintuitive when you are approaching 40 but I worry you are causing yourself a lot of stress searching for answers (when it looks like everything is normal) and this is in turn upsetting your cycles? I hope this suggestion doesn’t upset you x

It’s 17 days since my erpc and I think eggy is on her way! And so is dh, on a plane back home. I hope she doesn’t make an appearance right now but I can feel it and have ewcm.

TinyPaws · 30/03/2019 14:19

@Lilimum6 The chart placing ovulation on 27th looks right to me

Lilimum6 · 30/03/2019 13:14

Well I'm having a strange day too. After I put in my temp this morning fertility friend app changed my ovulation day now I'm more confused than ever and wondering if I ovulated at all. Arhhh why it this never easy!!! Does any one else use this app and has this happened to you? My temps are all over the place. Should I just go on my monitor and opks and hope for the best? I've included both screen shots so hopefully one of you ladies can make sense of it. If it's right I've gone back 2dpo 😭 so will have to wait even longer to know anything happened

TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!
TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!
Lilimum6 · 30/03/2019 13:08

@Laney79 oh I'm really sorry that your having these problems. Wish I could do something to help you. I hope that maybe this cycle will just be a blip and things improve for you. I had some problems 2 years ago with humpty dumpty cycles and I went on the pill for just 2 months and it did sort me out. I've also found that pregnacare conceptions vits through mine all over the place but seven seas trying for a baby doesn't. That's just my experience hun. How does DH feel about the results

TinyPaws · 30/03/2019 11:30

@Laney79 I'm going for my first acupuncture next week too! Fingers crossed it's helpful for both of us and sorry you're feeling so low.

moonpeace · 30/03/2019 08:34

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Laney79 · 30/03/2019 08:23

@InDreamland sorry about your D.H. results but I'm so glad that you got him to have the test. I really hope he takes some responsibility now, it's not fair for you to shoulder it all.

@ale2992 fingers crossed for you.

@Frillyfarmer memories like that are awful. I'd be angry with the world too-perfectly normal.

@moonpeace thanks for the Agnus cactus suggestion, I'll give it a try. I've been loathed to try any more vitamins etc as I conceived so quickly the second time so thought my body could do it with the same protocol but obviously not. Frankly the way things are I'm thinking anything is worth a try-I've tried the medics "it takes time" way-and it's got me no where.

@Bluebelltulip I think anything from cd9 onwards is prob ok...the problem from what I've read with earlier is two fold, one the egg isn't likely to have had time to mature enough and it's also unlikely the lining is thick enough for implantation. I looked up my hormone levels and it seems if I was an ivf patient they wouldn't even attempt treatment with my results as it wouldn't work, and high oestradiol is probably what's caused my early ovulation.

@Mistymeow I really don't like the idea of acupuncture but I've got so upset and stressed I've bitten the bulletin and booked in for a session next week. I'm petrified but I have to do something. I'm still doing opks to see if I do get another peak but I don't think so-body signs are that the peak earlier in the week was it. Ive not done by either as I thought it would add to anxiety but I'm going to start as frankly I can't get much more anxious.

@Lilimum6 deffo in with a chance.

Sorry not to reply to all. Xxx

OP posts:
Original poster
Laney79 · 30/03/2019 08:10

@Lilimum6 thanks, but we didn't. GP said it would be "ideal" and if we conceived would likely lead to another miscarriage. Not that I've been in any fit state to anyway. Basically sobbed my way through the past 48 hours. Been incredibly low.
I feel really let down. Basically if I'd never fallen pregnant the nhs would help me, but because I have, despite the fact they both died, I'm no longer eligible for help. I'm not even asking for fertility treatment-just some help to understand what's happening with my cycles/hormones from someone who specialises in the field. To just help me feel better and have a chance at having a healthy baby. But the GP said go on the pill, which we don't want to do as we both feel that that could make it even worse and is counter productive when we want a baby, or pay to see a fertility dr £240 for 30 mins.
I've been researching and reading a lot. My GP dismissed my day three hormone results but now I've looked into it more deeply I can see there's definitely a problem. My prolactin and oestradiol are too high for day three, my SHBG is out of range so is probably causing my low testosterone/FAI. I just don't know what to do about it.
I've lost all hope. You all know I struggle with my body and having any faith in it. Well what shred of belief I had that my body was capable of doing this has gone. I'm utterly and completely broken.
My chance of a baby in 2019 is gone. I should either have a five month old or be 36 weeks pregnant. Instead I have no hope, or faith that I'll ever be a mom, and no one that can help me will.
Sorry to be so down but I just don't know what to do.

TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!
OP posts:
moonpeace · 30/03/2019 08:08

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