TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!

@moonpeace Thanks. I look into that app. I’ve been using Ovia

Fingers crossed 🤞 for you too

@Squiff70 Sorry to hear you are struggling. I don’t think there is a “right” way to vent. Just listen to your body, your mind and your heart and do what feels right for you at that moment (as far as possible).

@frillyfarmer Thank you. We are still waiting for PM results but our baby girl was born wrapped up in her chord so we think that was the issue. She died before delivery though. I know what your colleague means. I’ve read of other people losing babies earlier on and then going on to have another baby and they obviously loved the baby they lost but also love their living child and know they wouldn’t have been here if not for the loss.

@Catconfusion It’s not immature at all. Facebook is not my friend at the moment. So many updates of babies and pregnancy. Today someone I went to uni with posting about the safe arrival of her baby boy. I “snoozed”. I don’t speak to her anymore anyway and last time I saw her at a friend’s wedding and she wasn’t very nice. I’m thinking of cutting down my friends to people I actually see and talk to and that way can avoid baby updates from people I don’t even really know any more!

It also annoys me when people don’t look after themselves when pregnant as I was super careful and then others who are. It careful or who don’t want their babies (seen so many mumsnet posts like that recently).

Sorry to see your update @Bluebelltulip seems you’ve had a confusing few days

Hugs to everyone else

@moonpeace I can really identify with what you said about seeing people you know are pregnant. An acquaintance of mine has announced her pregnancy and it made me so mad. She does weightlifting and is running a marathon while pregnant. It upset me so much as I know she's in a bad relationship and I'd have never done anything too strenuous while pregnant. It's probably immature but I unfriended her on FB. Her baby will be due not long after when mine would have been and I can't cope with baby updates. Xx

@InDreamland I think people try and say something positive but then just fail miserably because actually you just want someone to acknowledge how rubbish it is and be there for you. Xx

@Bluebelltulip sorry it was a case of false hope but fx this cycle you still catch Ov.

Thanks @Catconfusion, yep it really has upset me, so many people have said at least I can get pregnant to me and I feel like screaming no point if I can't keep them.

Sorry you find yourself here @Avf88. You'll find the ladies here really supportive.

How confusing @Bluebelltulip and I'm sorry it's more waiting. I've never heard of hpt picking up LH surge. Good you caught it and hopefully dtd at the right time if you're hoping to catch it. Good luck! Xx

I'm so sorry @Avf88 I was similar. I was ten weeks and had a tiny bleed so organised a scan to see baby early. We were excited. Never thought they'd be no heartbeat. It's horrible!

I think see how you go over the next couple of months. You can always start tracking your temperatures to see how your body is recovering. It's been traumatic for your OH too but with time he'll want to try again. Just focus on getting well for now! Xx

Sorry you are joining us Avf88 but welcome.

My feint bfp was a false hope at the weekend, been negative since. CM indicates ovulation instead which is consistent with my CD. I've heard of ovulation sticks detecting pregnancy but not the other way around. Now into another tww x

@Catconfusion I would have been 10 weeks, I had a little bit of bleeding but I had convinced myself I was overreacting when the dr organised me a scan, was so excited that I’d get to see baby earlier than 12week scan because it was all going to be ok...
They said to wait ideally till after first period and I do think waiting is the right thing to do because of the mental impact too. I think for me it’s just that not knowing from OH, when will he think it’s ok?! What if it’s months from now?!

It does seem very supportive, I hope I can add to that too xx

I'm so sorry @Avf88 How far along we're you? It's such a shock to lose a pregnancy and horrible this is your first experience of being pregnant. I would definitely do the test tomorrow and then give your body some time to heal. The doctors often say fine to try straight away but I have to say I needed more time than I realised. I had two miscarriages back to back and had I waited I might not have had the second.

This thread is lovely and I'm sure you'll get plenty of support during your recovery here. Xx

Hi everyone, can I join you? I’m 30 and had a miscarriage 3 weeks ago, my first pregnancy. The doctors said to take a pregnancy test tomorrow to check everything’s gone and it’s making me very emotional, I thought I was ok but think I’ve been fooling myself!

For TTC, I just want to wait till my first period is out of the way but OH wants to wait longer but no set time frame which is making me feel really out of control.

I’ve lurked on this thread recently but want to be involved

@InDreamland I know it's sometimes hard to believe healthcare professionals when they say things are normal after miscarriages. My periods are barely there so was pleased the lining wasn't an issue with my mmc. It probably was with the chemical I had straight after although I bled a lot. I think an ERPC can make the lining not conducive to implantation straight after.

I really hope you get a natural conception! It annoys me when people say at least you know you can get pregnant. It does however bode well you have had pregnancies. I'm so sorry they didn't work out though! Xx

@Catconfusion that's good that your lining is good. Scans I've had all say it's fine too. I guess though that every little change makes me worry lots, especially with my age.

@Laney79 fx all tests results come back positive and great you're on the list. It's progress. I saw something like that on the news yesterday about IVF, the stats are really scary. DH is trying to stay positive about our chances of another natural conception given we got pregnant twice last year but I'm petrified of another MC.

@Lilimum6 that's a good positive. Fx for this cycle!

@fnej01 we are looking into acupuncture now. DH is trying to get an appointment for us asap but think we won't get one in time for this cycle.

@Mistymeow so glad it sounds like it's nothing to worry about but also good now you're getting it seen to if it doesn't go. Fx it just disappears.

Another baby bomb at work! I can't take this! Why? Just why?

@Mistymeow I know I can't quite believe it looking back. It gave me so many fertility hang ups. That's why I was so shocked when we conceived first try because on some level I still felt something was wrong with me.

When I faced IVF with my ex I realised I was with the wrong person. I think in a strong relationship with support for each other it can be really positive despite how tough it is. I'd do anything for a family with my DH, even a donor egg if it came to it. It just feels so right. If his results come back low I'm prepared for IVF if we need it.

I really hope it doesn't come to it but it sounds like you're ready. Just think in a year all this worry could be over and we could be Mums already or heavily pregnant. I really want that for all the lovely ladies on this thread.

It's so funny how the nesting kicks in. I don't even realise I'm doing it. I get a low mood just before then on the day of O I get a bit high from the hormone surge and just want new configurations of furniture and everything tidy. It drives DH crazy! Xx

@Mistymeow I know I can't quite believe it looking back. It gave me so many fertility hang ups. That's why I was so shocked when we conceived first try because on some level I still felt something was wrong with me.

When I faced IVF with my ex I realised I was with the wrong person. I think in a strong relationship with support for each other it can be really positive despite how tough it is. I'd do anything for a family with my DH, even a donor egg if it came to it. It just feels so right. If his results come back low I'm prepared for IVF if we need it.

I really hope it doesn't come to it but it sounds like you're ready. Just think in a year all this worry could be over and we could be Mums already or heavily pregnant. I really want that for all the lovely ladies on this thread.

It's so funny how the nesting kicks in. I don't even realise I'm doing it. I get a low mood just before then on the day of O I get a bit high from the hormone surge and just want new configurations of furniture and everything tidy. It drives DH crazy! Xx

@lilimum6 great work, ovaries! Looks like your body is doing the right thing. I know it's hard but try to relax because my GP told me that stress can delay ovulation.
@catconfusion can't believe your ex lied and made you feel like it was you with the fertility issues, all because of embarrassment. So glad you've moved on and have a lovely DH. Yes they say 15million is considered normal, so my DH is on the low end of normal (and his other results are lowish- normal forms, morphology etc). I'm absolutely fine with IVF because I've known for years that we will probably need it. I know it's a tough journey but after going through the trauma of two MMC I feel like I've got the coping mechanisms in place to handle it. I'm also moving stuff around (ovulation time!) and redecorating, it's quite therapeutic.
@laney79 sorry your phobia came back in full force but it's always difficult when you're waiting for test results. I have heard of a fair few ladies being successful with IVF who are older, there may even be a thread on the infertility section. The fact you have successfully conceived twice is very encouraging (this is what I was told, despite not having a live birth).

Thanks ladies for your advice, I did see the GP today. He can feel a very small cyst in my breast which he is fairly certain is benign as it's tiny and movable. It may well be connected to my hormones and he said if it's not gone in a few weeks after my period (whenever that decides to show up!) he will refer me to the royal marsden just to be on the safe side. He was very reassuring but not exactly what I need right now!

Thanks @fnej01 sadly it's a case of money. We've just had a wedding, honeymoon and bought a house so can't afford it. I think if no success by the time I turn 40 in June we'll find the money! Xx

@Lilimum6 that's a lovely positive - woohoo jks time!

@Laney79 sounds like plans progressing quickly for you - great news! I have been diagnosed with APS/sticky blood and high NK cells, so meds are day 21 cyclogest twice a day, bfp aspirin + heparin + steroids (prednisolone). I don't want to risk miscarrying on holiday again, hence not trying until June. I had miscarriages hanging over my head on holidays twice last year, and so will delay. Helpfully fw is while we are away though, so will try then fingers crossed.

@InDreamland @Catconfusion other thing that has helped me I think is acupuncture if you aren't already going down that route.

X

Hey @Laney79 I think I'd be exactly the same at an ivf appointment. At least you have some information but hopefully you'll have success naturally.

Yes I've had some very sad days this cycle due to two failed ovulations. Since I started temping with Ovusense last August I've never had this happen. I do have pcos but I've always ovulated and had 4/5/6 week cycles. One was 8 weeks but my body didn't even try until it happened. It's been distressing to get all the symptoms and then they fade with a temp drop. It's been really triggering. Luckily I think yesterday was finally it on day 36. Now hopefully the wait for bfp or AF. I have a 17 day LP so some way to go yet! Xx

@Lilimum6 that's really good news. I hope that's a rise coming for you too as it's horrible being in limbo! Xx

@Laney79 thanks hun x I'm going well prepared.

As for old cheese I think I might be the oldest cheese I've been here since thread 14 lol

@Mistymeow it would seem you were 100% correct my poor little ovaries are trying again only it's a definite positive this time - fingers crossed 🤞