TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!

I am feeling really low about it all too so big hugs to all of you having a hard time. 3 baby bombs recently has really hit me hard. It's not even like I can avoid these people either.

Wow this thread moves fast.

@Lilimum6 sorry you're feeling so rubbish about all this. Given what you've been through it's totally normal to feel like this. Hope you can get to see your GP quickly. Get every test going.

Jumping in on the exercise discussion, when pregnant both times I didn't stop and carried on with weights etc. but I did find I needed to drop down to a slightly lower weight and also just didn't have the energy to go for it full pelt like I normally do. I think it is healthy to continue what you do exercise wise as much as you can if you're already exercising. That said I lost both babies so maybe next time if it happens I'll take it much more easy but I hate not exercising.

Should be having first acupuncture session tomorrow. Decided to give it a try as so many here have recommended it. I've gotta try something new. Half way through antibiotics today too.

Yes I would be inclined to take the 7am time. Definitely book the doctor today. If it is low progesterone this is very treatable. You clearly do ovulate because of your pregnancies. I’m sure your GP will be happy to do a day 21 test- perhaps you could even do it during this cycle. You will be ok. I’ve had problems with ovulation last year and it was fixable- all down to hormone imbalance because of the miscarriage. Now go and ring the doctor’s and get some reassurance :)

@strawberrye I did enter the first on on to the app before going back to sleep does that count as moving to much. I've since changed it to the second temp.

@lilimum6 if you didn't get up or move around much I'd probably enter the 7am one

@moonpeace @Mistymeow and anyone else that temps.
I'm still waiting for the stupid temp rise but I need advice I woke up randomly at 5.30am and my temp was 36.91 so went back to sleep and took it again at the proper time of 7am and it was 36.66 which temp should I use neither will be the big temp rise I was hoping for but don't know what to enter on FF today

@Lilimum6 definitely go and see a doctor. I feel so much better that I'm now speaking to the doctors and getting the necessary tests. Even it reveals there is nothing particularly wrong and we just need to keep trying at least I will know I've looked into stuff. Just being able to take some form of action when we feel so out of control with everything that is going on helps in my opinion. This journey really sucks.

@moonpeace Thanks hun I'll get in with a doc if I can.

I'm so fed of all this now, I'm so upset I just don't know what to do with myself. Ttc is stressing me out but the idea of not ttc is worst. I just need nature to cut me a break. I've tried to talk to DH but he just doesn't get why I'm so upset he just keeps telling me to stop worrying about it which really isn't helpful. Literally all I seem to do these days is worry or cry.

@moonpeace I haven't yet I thought that because I've had 3 mmc's in a row that did not end naturally even after waiting that my progesterone was OK but I'm wondering now. I've put last month's chart up do you think it says low progesterone?

Thanks @Lillimum6 @Bluebelltip @Catconfudion @fnej01

It’s difficult to strike a balance. I could easily give it all up but love the steam room / sauna. Having said that I hadn’t been in from last June when I found out I was pregnant until this month so it’s not like I can’t live without it

I have dtd twice but think it was too early anyway so not even 2ww but I know I can be OTT too

I’ll avoid things like ibuprofen for sure

Totally agree about taking a break from social media if it’s causing upset. I’ve snoozed several baby bores for my own sanity. My dh who is usually so sensitive asked if I’d congratulated our friend yet on her pregnancy. I glared and said “well she hasn’t reached out to me and said sorry for my loss. It works both ways.” Silly dh. We are going to the US all of June mainly to get away from our pregnant friends but also to recover from the stress of it all.
@lilimum6 you are at exactly the same point as me (positive opk yesterday and cramping today). Don’t worry about the temp rise, it can take a few days. Sometimes you get a drop on O day and it shoots back up. I’m pretty certain you are not broken! I would bd today if you can.
@laney79 sorry to hear it’s Bow’s due date (cute nickname) and I’m glad you have a nice lunch planned. It’s ok to feel sad- do whatever you want to help you through. Lots of positive vibes for this cycle x

I don’t cut out anything whilst ttc because I’ve been doing this almost 3 years now and I think I would go mad! Instead I do everything in moderation- cut back caffeine and alcohol and generally lead a healthy life. I struggle a bit with my weight (lose weight easily) so that’s my big issue (as it affects ovulation). I also do steam room but don’t overdo it.

As I said absolutely fine @Bluebelltulip I know it wasn't your intention. It's a useful point though for anyone wondering about exercise for when they get their bfp.

This is such a strange kind of grief and so unique to the individual circumstances. It's so nuanced and I've also found it unpredictable.

Above all it's really made me question who I want in my life. Also whether I want social media to be part of it. The only triggers then are the real life ones. Mumsnet is such a great source of strength and support though, I definitely wouldn't be without it! Xx

I find that I'm surprised by what triggers me and sometimes the things that I think will doesn't upset me at all. I really didn't intend to make you feel like you had to justify it x

That's ok @Bluebelltulip and @strawberrye I completely understand the point you were making. As I think I made clear though there is a lot more to this than just the marathon training. I was just really surprised by how much it upset me and was looking at it with interest really. Certainly wasn't shaming anyone.

I see Mumsnet as a safe space to talk about the things that trigger me. As it's a forum about pregnancy loss, the things that trigger us can maybe seem irrational to others. I just wasn't expecting to feel I had to justify myself. That said sometimes a discussion about these issues can bring up salient ideas that might be helpful to other people. Xx

@Lilimum6 I'm sorry there is so much uncertainty with your cycle at the moment and that it's contributing to you feeling so low. I truly hope this is your body settling down after your most recent loss and I believe a successful pregnancy is possible for you. Sending hugs fellow old cheese.

@catconfusion I am sorry you feel that my posts made you feel your reaction was not valid, that was not my intention at all. I just wanted to add that exercise including weights in pregnancy isn't automatically bad, and that women shouldn't be judged or shamed for this. I know you weren't doing this but after loss I think we are all prone to self-blame and being very sensitive to what might and might not harm a pregnancy, and didn't want there to be possible interpretations or undercurrent of blaming women who exercise in pregnancy

@Beaglemum93 and @Catconfusion thanks ladies but the way I'm feeling at the moment is that I might have to except it will never happen. 6 mc's and now ovulation issues plus my age is making me think I'm passed it and need to learn how to live with out a baby in my future

Thanks @Beaglemum93 I was going to say @Lilimum6 it looks as if you're likely to get another rise tomorrow. If so you dtd on the day of ovulation and early in the day so that's good. My temp goes up over several days when I ovulate. Here's my chart! Try not to worry or think the worse. I'm one to talk but I'll say it anyway! Xx

@Catconfusion even if I did ovulate the bd was all at the wrong time because I usually ovulate around cd10

Sometimes it can take a couple of days for temp to rise after ovulation so don't give up hope @Lilimum6

@Lilimum6 sorry your having such a hard time. Take care of yourself x x

@Catconfusion here is my totally messed up chart