Over 40 TTC - lots of baby dust for us...2!

Ooh not sure @mellongoose I had cm for about 8 days and can't remember how many of those it was ewcm for.. but jump the hubs just to be on the safe side.. x

Its a little hard to guess but I’m pretty certain this baby was conceived the day before my ewcm stopped

Mellon - my ewcm has usually well and truly dried up by the time I ov, so its definitely well before. Go for it, whats to lose

Here's a question about EWCM.

Sorry TMI! Had mine since about Sunday evening but haven't been able to dtd because of work and illnesses! It still appears to be going strong. I've got a bit of cramping (never usually notice this at ov) also had it yesterday. Does one ov at the beginning or end of EWCM?!

Ie if I hit it tonight can I have an optimistic TWW?!

We don't have a deadline... we're just keeping enjoying the contraceptive free sex..

Yes please to the progesterone @eloisa246

I'll pm you

@BooseysMom it's not over whilst AF still makes an appearance so keep trying!

Hmmm and Rose.. I'm sorry too .it is just so disheartening. I've also extended my deadline more times than I can remember and now here I am at 47 and yes it's so slim a chance it will happen now. If it did I'd be constantly petrified of the worse happening. I just don't know what to do any more

Hellen - sending you love as you process what happened. I can't imagine facing such a decision....you were thinking of your child's future and of their wellbeing. There is no way you are being punished now! I really hope you can get the support you need to forgive yourself.

Hmmm and Rose -sorry your af arrived.

Hobbes - thank you so much for the progesterone. I actually managed to talk my GP into prescribing it! So now I can forward yours to someone else in the group. Hmmm - would you like it? Message me if so!

Lovely flowers Chat.

Yeah they need to be peescribed and they are a bit of a pain the the arse to get hold of (excuse the pun 🤣)

Thanks @Cleozeta where can I get them? Do I need to be prescribed them?

Hmmm - I tried everything to extend my lp, B6, vit C, B complex etc, nothing worked except cyclogest pesseries. Alll worth a try though.

Don't give up @Rose68 and @hellenbackagen 💕💕

It's tough though isn't it? I keep extending my deadline I really thought we were in with a chance this month and I only have one more shot until my extended deadline!

I might extend until the end of summer to make myself feel better. Lots of sunshine might help!

I've also been thinking my LP is too short got smiley face on cd13 which probably mean I ovulate cd15 and then Af arrived on cd25 that's not long enough.

I might try taking B6. Has anyone done this? I take oreganacare conception so I know there is some in there wonder how much I can take on top?

Thank you Chat and Hellen, I think I’m slowly giving up. This just isn’t meant to be. x

hi boosey and everyone

thank you all again. its just hard going at times and i do navel gaze and wonder what if.

hmmm sorry af arrived

rose same for you but on the flip side it means you get to enjoy the skiing! (and the apres ski!)

ive cracked open the opk for a last ditch effort - will start tomorrow since this cycle was shorter than others at 27 days now ive counted.
i think when ive used this one im going to give it up and just let nature take its course. in reality there are very few people who get pg at 47 and i think i need to put the idea to bed. im just not sure how you do it!

love to all.

I'm out! Af just arrived. Timed bd really well this month too .. so am now worried that it won't happen at all..

Thank you Chat for your lovely heart yesterday. Love back at you and to all

Hellen..how are you today? I have just caught up with the thread and can see you're battling with the decision you came to. I'm so sorry Hellen. I think what Chat and others previous have said is exactly right ..there is no crystal ball and you had to take into consideration so much that could go wrong in the future. It doesn't make things any easier i know but you can only do what you think is right with the info given. If it's any consolation I would have come to the same decision. Take all the support and help you are offered now and try to rest and heal. Big hugs

@Rose68 enjoy the skiing guilt free and yummy food and booze.. let your hair down and have a damn good time... on the top of the world xx

Now I'm expected to organise a card collection and present for pregnant colleague. Just what I feel like, trawling Mothercare on my lunch break 😕

AF has arrived here, so I can ski properly yay!
I’m still feeling a bit crappy about it though.. I’m wondering if that’s it for me, I didn’t go to acupuncture last week and I haven’t made an appointment for this week. The beginning of the end?

Lots of love to all of you beautiful ladies

@Hellenbackagen my best friend lost her little boy when he was 5 months old, he had DS but it was an unrelated complication that took him... that they were totally unprepared for.. there is no crystals ball at all in life.. it throws shite at you from any angle.. you made a decision with the information that you had.. I've worked in care home with elderly people with DS.. there many facets to DS.. but you need to care for you and going to you GP is the best place to start, they will be able to refer you to the right area of support or counselling.. you aren't rambling, your thoughts are important.. sending you lots of love today 💕💕💕

ladies thank you for the words of wisdom and kindness - its just hard and i never truly imagined that it would be our last chance at parenthood together. so stupid really because i was 44 then. its hard now, especially when i see kids with T21 who arent so badly affected but there is a huge spectrum and the problem is there is no crystal ball. would she have been one of the lucky ones or one of those who got dementia in her 30s, cancer, heart problems, breathing problems, hearing and sight issues.....it was all such an unknown. the risk was too great at my age because i was already having nightmares about who would be her carer after we were gone. and my midwife told me at the time her friend had just lost her 4 year old dd with T21 due to complicated heart issues. i wish there had been a way of knowing to what extent she would have been affected. but there wasnt and i cant change history - im just so sad at times about it all. i was absolutely elated when i took the test and saw the line, and just had absolutely no reason to think that i wouldnt be holding my baby by the new year. my dreams were shattered with one phone call. and theyve stayed shattered ever since. im not going to get my rainbow and im not finding it easy to come to terms with. but thank you all again - i know that at the time i did extensive research and i rang arc a number of times. its just not something i ever thought id be dealing with. the fact i havent got pg in the 3.5 years since feels like some sort of punishment. and i just often wonder if she was just meant to be and i denied her. i wish those thoughts would go away - but they dont. i rang arc just once more on DS awareness day because i just wanted to hide under the duvet. i was really tearful and i didnt find much comfort in anything that day. i wouldnt even know where to start with the type of counselling id need.
anyway thank you for letting me ramble on here....there isnt anyone in rl i can ramble to! x