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Conception

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The July '19ers - knocked down, but never beaten

961 replies

Frazzlerock · 03/12/2018 09:41

Hey @TinselBee, @Rose68, @BettySwoll0cks

Here is the thread I promised us.

Somewhere for us to help eachother, pick one another up, cry, scream, laugh..

Some of us may be looking to try again, some may be putting things on hold. Whatever our plans, lets get through this together.

(I don't know whether conception was the right choice of topic, I can always have this moved to a more suitable topic if anyone would like me to)

I will look through our threads again and see if I can @mention anyone else who might like to join us

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Frazzlerock · 06/01/2019 13:10

@Rose68 I will hold out until AF is due. I tested at 14dpo last time and even then I was reluctant. The problem is my 2nd loss I started MCing on the day we got our BFP so I like to leave it as long as possible. As Ovu says I ov'd 2 days later than FF, I will go with that and test maybe 14 days after that. But I probably won't get that far as I'm sure AF will show up. But I'd rather than then see a BFN
How about you?

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TwittleBee · 06/01/2019 13:09

I can't help but look at that thread every now and then. Also can't help but keep comparing myself to my friends that are also due in june/July

Regarding the growth thing, growth stopped for me at time of the car crash, never saw any more growth. Keep thinking how I could have gone blissfully unaware for a further 4 weeks as that's when my body finally started bleeding.

When are those in TWW planning on testing? I don't know whether to hold out for when AF would be due judging by FF or test before

Kinsters · 06/01/2019 12:52

Rose I haven't looked at that thread. Couldn't bear to. I did hold a 7 month old baby at NYE though and last night had a really vivd dream about holding my own lovely chubby baby girl and it felt so nice and then I woke up. Really hope I get to feel that for real soon!

Rachyrach83 · 06/01/2019 12:47

I wouldn’t have one prior to 7 as it’s all too easy for them to say ‘we might not see it yet’ and ‘that’s normal’
At 8 it’s clear what we should be seeing and that’s why I’ll -try to- wait until then x

BettySwoll0cks · 06/01/2019 12:42

It's all so variable. Mine didn't start growing at all until 7wks (my scan showed gest sac & yolk but no fetal pole) then it grew 4mm and showed a hb, and then it died. Too little too late I guess. I think I would have an early scan at 8 weeks maybe, but even if it was good news, it wouldn't put my mind at rest for long.

Rose68 · 06/01/2019 12:40

@Kinsters yes indeed we should. I had a quick look at the July thread this morning which was incredibly stupid of me. I have mostly come to terms with what happened now, but sometimes I really don’t help myself.

Kinsters · 06/01/2019 12:32

Same with me Prosecco, once it dies I think it starts to shrink really quickly, in some cases at least. From one scan to another (one week) mine lost its hb and didn't grow at all and then a couple of days later it was gone completely (the Dr may have been able to see it if she looked but to me all I saw was an empty sac). My belief is that it died very shortly before the second scan, maybe a day or two.

The same could definitely have happened to you.

Rose I wish we weren't still TTC either. Should be chatting about our growing babies 😔

Rose68 · 06/01/2019 12:31

@Frazzlerock hello dpo sister! Do you think you will test before AF is due to come? x

Rachyrach83 · 06/01/2019 12:22

@prosecco
I doubt it was that long, your baby may have grown slowly
As I said my baby hb stopped between 8+6 and 9+4 days ..... but it measured 5+6. It grew slowly, it didn’t die at 5+6... it was still very much beating at 8+5 but was too small. I don’t know if that’s any comfort to you but I really doubt your baby had died so early xx

ProseccoBee · 06/01/2019 12:15

@rachey killing my self laugh at the scrambled egg/ fanny juice! And @rose aww I know I wish we were all on here for another reason aswell. In regards to the scan I thought they were a waste of money last time but I would have to have one next time. I just can’t understand how I could be 12 weeks but they told me the baby had stopped at7/8 weeks. I kept and still do keep asking myself how could I not have known for that long? So next time will be doing one at about nine weeks I think

Rachyrach83 · 06/01/2019 11:55

I wish I was trying to be funny... feeling egg shell goop has become my life!!
I remember when new shoes got me this excited!!

I've got another high day on CBFM too (day 15!)
IC's are supposed to test for LH surge... I have one step ones now and the control line is much lighter than the other ones I had... still no surge tho

Did a HPT as getting impatient to wait for dr results of blood work (I know it's been 2 days!) and I don't think it could BE more negative (in the style of Chandler Bing!) so FX Ov will turn up at some point!! (Ring tip to focus works a treat btw!!)

Frazzle I have read that grapefruit juice pre Ov helps with FJ.... I hate it but going to get some!!

The July '19ers - knocked down, but never beaten
Rose68 · 06/01/2019 11:36

Rachy you are so funny, I can’t stop giggling 😂

If I was ever to get preggers again I would have a scan as soon as possible from 6 weeks. And then probably lots more scans after that. If I hadn’t had my scan, goodness knows when I would have finally found out. I am pretty sure the foetus shrinks after it stops growing, so if at 12 weeks they tell you it’s measuring at 6 weeks, it probably didn’t stop growing at 6 weeks, if that makes sense. My fetal pole had shrunk to nothing by my last scan 😞

I wish we weren’t all ttc and we were on here for some other reason, it’s so pants, I hate it taking over my life. I am seriously considering not carrying on. x

smerlin · 06/01/2019 11:23

If anyone wants to go caffeine free, Clipper tea and Decadent coffee co both use natural processes for decaffeination. Most mainstream brands use chemical stripping (I have just found out due to obsessive internet browsing!)

Another CBFM high day for me. Flo app thinks I will ov on 23rd (has 8 months of cycle history) and Glow (new app) thinks 13th Confused

Really should get some internet cheapie OPKs. Do they measure LH surge?

smerlin · 06/01/2019 11:19

Or FJ for short...

Frazzlerock · 06/01/2019 10:49

And I can't even tell DP why I'm laughing so much as he would think I'd lost the plot if he knew about CM obsession
Can we all now call it Foof Juice instead?

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Frazzlerock · 06/01/2019 10:47

Oh my god!
FOOF JUICE!

Dying 🤣🤣🤣

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Rachyrach83 · 06/01/2019 10:07

On a seperate note can I just tell you all I really rate Sainsbury’s HPTs
They are + ones which I know aren’t as easy to read, but I have found them very clear. They are only £3.50 for 2 and measure at ‘15’ which is quite low I believe 👍🏼

Rachyrach83 · 06/01/2019 10:03

@Frazzlerock hi there!!
We sure have a LOT of similarities!!
I can honestly say I've never seen any ewcm... because I've never looked at my foof juice before!! 😂
I was making scrambled eggs the other day and found myself studying the egg white ... my DH asked me what the hell i was doing feeling the inside of the egg shell... I didn't want to put him off his breakfast by telling him I was comparing my fanny juice to it!! 😂😂 I said the shell was a funny colour. He said I was strange!! 😂😂

Kindara is basically the same as FF from what I can see just a bit 'prettier'... not sure really!! I'm not sure if it will add those lines etc and the dpo yours adds?? If my purchase arrives I'm going to chart FF too with the temp to see if it correlates.

HAPPY SUNDAY EVERYONE

Frazzlerock · 06/01/2019 09:35

Oh wow, that might be my longest post EVER!

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Frazzlerock · 06/01/2019 09:35

Morning,

I've missed a whole day after my wobble yesterday morning! Thank you all for having my back Smile This is likely to be long so brace yourselves!

@Kinsters Your temp is looking great! You might still be in your fertile window too so keep BDing!

@BettySwoll0cks I don't know how charting works if you keep getting woken up. I know Ovu needs 4 hours consecutive sleep to get the temp accurate. But, as Kinsters says, try a cycle and see?

@ratherbeshowjumping I'm impressed by your turkey baster attempts! I think DP would lose his shit with me if I suggested that! I love that your DH is so willing to try at least. He is clearly 100% on board with this TTC malarky. Re vitamins, I haven't dared ask DP to take anything, though I have told him that Vitamin D spray and Feroglobin is good for him (not on a TTC level, just generally) so I often give him spray of my Vit D and a spoonful of Feroglobin.

@TwittleBee I'm sorry you're feeling so crap. I don't know much about allergies. Weird you're not usual allergic to anything though, maybe second opinion with the GP on Monday might confirm whether this is true or not?
Re your chart yesterday morning, I also put in EWCM (got it after having a poo but now I think that was just random 'poo function' EWCM - god this is so gross) and got the dotted lines. SOo I removed the EWCM and put back to 'creamy' which is what I'd entered for that day originally, and solid lines are back. BTW, 'm so pleased you don't have shingles, I've heard it is awful. Though DS1 had it just after our first MC and he all he had was the tell tale rash line around his middle, no other symptoms. His GP was really excited to see shingles in a child Hmm I think it is quite unusual.
Wow, look at that temp this morning! I am not sure that allergies affect temp, do they?

@smerlin re risks of caffeine, I've not yet read the articles you've found (will do in a bit) but I have avoided it in all my pregnancies (actually went off the taste of it anyway, but would have stopped regardless) and, as of this cycle, I have stuck to de-caff on @Rose's recommendation, given I have PCOS and I am old Grin I doubt I could get DP to part with caffeine.

@Rachyrach83 Our DP/DHs really do sound very similar "But his comes out in temper and flying off the handle...." - this is very much my DP too. I have also been on ADs in the couple of years we weren't TTC after losing our second. I was in a terrible way, suicidal at times. After seeing the GP, I slowly weaned myself off ADs when DP agreed to try again in June. I've not touched them since and don't miss them either, but my depression was 100% entirely down to DP refusing to try again. So it was easy for me to snap out of it once he agreed. It was pretty much instant.
My DP was also angry at me after I had our second scan. I knew something wasn't right but, because we'd seen a heartbeat, he refused to trust my instinct and trusted the sonographer that my dates were out and I didn't ovulate when I thought. Funny I turned out to be right... Though wish I hadn't been. At that time I was an emotional wreck as I knew our baby wouldn't survive and he just couldn't get on my level.
"Re CM I swear Its like someone chucked sand on it" - sorry but this made me laugh, I have this same feeling when everyone is talking about EWCM and I'm over here like this Confused Grin
I've never heard of Kindara, how does that compare to the FF?
BTW, I just remembered we were due the same day (28th June) and both had our dates pushed back.
I don't know about that device but I checked reviews last night and all seems good! I hope it arrives and I'd be interested to hear your experience with it. Too bad for the seller if they can't put a reasonable starting bid in. That's their own fault!

@princessbala I'm so sorry you're struggling so much and you have to wait until tests have been done. I would be struggling too if I had to wait. TTC is keeping me afloat! We are also due to go to the RMC in February but no one has told us not to TTC in the meantime. We started trying again as soon as I stopped bleeding.

@Rose68 Funny you should say that about being well up for it around ov. I was exactly like that this time around, but then I am always up for it, just that the need was even more increased! I think I need to check into a sex clinic (like Russell Brand) for my addiction Grin
How are you today, DPO Sister? Grin

@Kinsters I don't know about FF tampering, I only started using it this cycle after seeing so many of you using it (and it was free of course). I can't tamper with Ovu as it syncs automatically. But it literally only goes on core temp and no other symptoms.

@edidxb agree with the others, 30 day cycle is perfect so soon after MC. Go you! Grin Fx for a fresh new cycle x

Thank you for all the support re my melodrama yesterday morning. The thing is it depended on either FF or Ovusense whether I was still in my fertile window or not. FF has said I had Ov'd two days before Ovusense predicted. Ovu was saying I was still very much in my fertile window so I wanted to get BDing as much as poss in that time just in case. DP said it can wait until tomorrow (Saturday) so I think I should probably explain about the 24 hour window.
Still after feeling all weepy early Saturday morning, I went upstairs to DP who had finally woken up and we had a little chat. I explained regardless of TTC I have a high sex drive so it really wasn't all about that. He said he knew that and that he thinks he has a low sex drive. I didn't want to rock the boat by explaining the 24 window so, now we are back on form (and finally out of my ov window!) I might have a little chat about our chances and PCOS/age etc.

Betty he seems on board with trying and knows it keeps me out of that black hole I was in, he knows it makes me happy and that is ultimately what he wants. I do think that he wants a baby too (especially after seeing a heart beat for the first tie ever of something he created) but he has real paranoia about the way of the world and if we are irresponsible bring a child into this world. He's even more hyper aware since the stabbing on the train in the news yesterday.
Kinster He could see I was in my fertile window on Ovusense, but he doesn't know that FF had predicted ovulation a coupe of days before.
Anyway, we BDd yesterday and we Bd'd on both predictions of ovulation so hopefully we are covered...

I've had terrible back ache for ten days now, I've no idea what brought it on, it started so gradually. Got GP appointment on Monday so hopefully I can get some physio. It's lower right side, no clue what it could be. I only ever get mild back ache around ovulation or AF but not like this! It's a real stabbing pain.

Re other people's comments, I've certainly had my share and it sucks massively. Especially if it is from someone who you wouldn't expect.

Re scans, I honestly don't know. If I avoid them I don't think I can allow myself to be blissfully unaware but, at the same time, what is the point? They only show if baby is okay in that moment. I don't know.

Good news, our internet is back and I have another even higher temp at 36.89 which is the highest it got in my preg cycle

OP posts:
ProseccoBee · 06/01/2019 09:24

Morning all, just checking in. I’m currently on a weekend escape to the country, it’s been lovely and once last chance to get away from it all before heading back to work tommorow. I am absolutely dreading going back as I only told my boss I was pregnant and one other person but it would seem everyone now knows about the pregnancy and the miscarriage. I am fuming as I know il be an emotional wreck if everyone gives me cuddles or asks about it, if have much preferred to just be able to go in and do my job as normal. Supposed it’s to be expected seeing as how I was off sick and literally since the day we got married all anyone’s asked is are you pregnant when are you going to have a baby etc.
@ratherbe I’m kind of cheating with the caffeine at the moment. I promised myself I would give it up once my current coffee collection has gone and then I’ll go cold turkey. Tbh I think I will be alright I managed the 12 weeks of pregnancy alright so just got to keep reminding myself of that.
@rachyrach seems we had the same due date. I was due June 28th and every time I think about it I just keep thinking I would have only had six months left and in five months I’d be in maternity(had everything planned) but now there’s nothing. I can’t believe I am back here trying to conceive.
@princessbala I also get stupid remarks of “well at least you can pregnant” which is infuriating and so stupid of people to say!

Another stupid thing I finally got round to cancelling all my maternity/midwife appointments. Which was a right faff. I honestly can’t see why the NHS couldn’t be linked and in situations like this everyone involved in your care be alerted. But at least I didn’t cry my eyes out when explaining to the midwife team why I wouldn’t be making the appointment this week so I guess that’s progress.

@twittle so sorry about the negative test and the feeling awful! It’s all you need on top of everything else! Onwards and upwards for us all though aye!

Hope everyone else is doing well and enjoying the weekend x

Rose68 · 06/01/2019 09:06

@princessbala I am so sorry for what you have been through, it definitely seems the right thing to do for you to wait for now. I’m sure they will be able to help you.

@Twittlebee sorry you have been so ill, I hope you are okay.

@Rachy I think it’s more likely they will send it to you, if they don’t surely you can complain about them big time.

@edidxb I think the first cycle following a mc is always a bit strange, so it’s good AF has come and hopefully your next cycle will be back to normal.

I have worked out that my lack of pmt is due to the dhea I’m taking, so that’s the end of that line of hope.

BettySwoll0cks · 06/01/2019 08:06

I'm getting some EWCM this morning, CD18. It feels really weird not to be trying this month (and there's a little bit of me that's tempted!) but I would rather wait a month and be in better shape than have a 4th mc and be back in exactly this same position in 4 months time ☹️

TwittleBee · 06/01/2019 07:37

That makes sense with the little dip too and you DTD day before too Kin

Well as I'm ill with this allergic reaction I'm wondering if that's making my temp high?

Kinsters · 06/01/2019 07:25

Yeah if I put in the next two days at 36.5 it predicts I ovulated on Saturday but with dashed lines due to missing earlier temperatures.

Your charts looking good! If it stays high for the next couple of days it could be triphasic! Do you have some frers left over?