TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 27 - BFPs are coming!

Thanks for replying @Laney79 - I'm completely freaked out by it and DH is our at a meeting so I don't know what to do! I might have some CB in the glove box I'll have to look once DS is down.

It's definitely positive isn't it? The gap has been too short since MC to ovulate, conceive and show on a cheapy but they did an internal and confirmed they couldn't see anything and I came back BFN from the test so they'd ruled out ectopic. I don't know, honestly what a complete and utter mind fuck.

@frillyfarmer i have no idea, but that test is clearly positive!! Do you have another test you could try?

I'd ring your early pregnancy unit and discuss with them-maybe the original nurse got it wrong and it was just too early to tell? Did they do an internal scan when you went?

I've just made a new thread but I should have posted this in here really!

Evening ladies,

Hopefully someone can shed some logic on this because I'm so confused right now.

Big bleed on 16th Jan, scanned on 18th and nurse confirmed I had miscarried, nothing retained in uterus, did a pregnancy test that day which was negative, I followed it up two days later with a FRER because I'm neurotic and I love pissing away money (literally). I worked out my own dates at just under 6 weeks.

Started OPKs because see above 😬 and have had four days of consecutive positives on OPKs so decided to do a cheapy PG test- it has come back positive straight away - attached pic.

I'm on cycle day 11 taking my bleed as day 1, so too early to have ovulated and got a positive on a cheap PG test?

I don't want to waste nurse/GP time but I'm trying to understand what has happened and how likely it is that I've got a false negative on this test?

Thanks in advance xx

@InDreamland sorry to hear you've got a cold. How many days dpo are you now?

@MummyG82 I had lots of on off spotting after losing my first. I also had a negative test but I think I had a bit of tissue left over as I lost something grey and unusual during my first period. Hope your body sorts itself soon.

Glad to hear the spotting has stopped @Mistymeow x

@Chilliandlime No advice but know you're not alone, it's so frustrating when your body doesn't play ball.

@Topsey83 Welcome, sorry to hear of your losses. These ladies are amazing, a huge support.

@Lilimum6 Thinking of you ahead of tomorrow.

As for me -another odd AF. Very heavy fri and sat, light to medium flow sun, today barely even brown spotting. So basically just three days!! I hope that doesn't mean more issues, what do you guys think?

I'm waiting on a quote for private tests at the moment. I've got a list of the tests they do as standard at Tommy's in cov, I've had some of them, but not all so going to pay for the others. Would never forgive myself if I miscarry again and then they do the tests and find something treatable that could've saved my bub.

Hi everyone, I’m new here. I’m 35 with two children already, TTC conceive 3rd but going through my 2nd CP in 4 months 😢

@Dimblebimble thanks, unfortunately I now have full on cold. Feeling very sorry for myself. Think it's doing the rounds at work, so many have either got it or just recovering.

@Mistymeow and @Chilliandlime thank you.

@InDreamland hope this year brings better things for you.
@Lilimum6 hope tomorrow is as bearable as it can be and the staff are sensitive.
@MummyG82 have you had any signs of ovulation? It can be pretty delayed or not happen at all the first cycle. I'm also having a very confusing first cycle, had an MVA on 28th Dec after erpc and medical management earlier in Dec. Definitely o'd between 13th and 15th Jan as was confirmed by a scan on 15th, had the smallest amount of spotting at 6dpo and strong af cramps on 11 and 12dpo and now nothing, 15dpo and no sign of af. bfn, low enough temps so not sure what's happening, really want it to hurry up.

@mummyg82 it can stop and start a bit (very annoying I know). Perhaps for reassurance you could take a more sensitive test? I know the digital ones aren’t that sensitive (just in case there is a small amount of hcg left). So sorry for your loss.
@knitkitty thanks lovely. I’ve downloaded a mindfulness app and it did calm me down.
@InDreamland your cuddly monkey sounds adorable, and glad you saw a rainbow too.
@dimblebimble that must have been alarming but relieved it’s stopped. Could well be implantation still as you are so early.

I’ll probably have an early scan. I think it’s a matter of personal preference. Possible it will only alleviate the nerves a short while but as I had an anembryonic pregnancy discovered at 9w4, I would like to see my baby (even if no heartbeat is found). I would probably avoid going before 7 weeks in case it’s too early to see a heartbeat (then you are in limbo with even more anxiety) so I’m hoping to go at 8/9 weeks (if I get that far). My brown spotting has eased off now. Hope everyone is doing ok in this cold weather!

Hi again,.so I had a surgical erpc on 28th December, I had very light bleeding for a week after, then nothing for a week, then every other week ive been having very dark spotting, not enough to fill a pantyliner, anyone else had something similar? I keep thinking it's the start of af but then it stops for a week n then it's back again? Any ideas n should I be concerned? I've had a negative digi test a week n a half ago as well.

@InDreamland both times I conceived I felt totally wiped out the week before af was due. The first time I'd been out drinking the weekend before my bfp so I thought I was having a mega week long hangover (i rarely drink so not used to it). So you never know...

@Yukka @InDreamland @Frillyfarmer I agree that the scans only give temporary reassurance. I found that last time. My plan is to hold out until 12 weeks unless I have significant spotting like last time. I feel like even if everything's okay at 12 weeks I won't be able to relax.

Actually, I'm about to teach an 8 week course so if it is bad news I'd rather know at 12 weeks than before. I don't know how I'd cope if I had bad news while the course is running as no one can cover for me. Last time when I had my mmc I wasn't teaching so I was able to manage, mainly worked from home.

I'm also simultaneously hoping for morning sickness (didn't have any symptoms last time except occasional cramping) and dreading feeling sick whilst teaching 🤢

Ooops hit post too soon. Also don't know when AF is due. Before second mc cycle was 27 or 28 days but my first proper cycle since second mc in November was only 26 days.

@Dimblebimble I hope that the distraction at work does help. Pregnancy after mc is so tough and that anxiety takes the shine off it sadly. Fx for a healthy sticky bean!

@Laney79 thank you. I totally get what you're saying. I also want to avoid internal scans now and think I'd try hold out until at least 9 weeks (whether I have the will power though). Last internal scan I had ended with my second mc with bleeding starting pretty much within a minute of the scan finishing.

@Frillyfarmer you shouldn't feel guilty for your feelings or how you see your mc -
however you feel is totally natural and normal for you.

I'm either 8 or 9 dpo and think I'm out already this month. Think I'm coming diem with something. Just feel so tired, and just weird, like this strange dull headache but rest of body feels odd too. not describing very well. Being ill TTC is never good.

Personally I don't really understand the reassurance scans - I take the view that the NHS start scanning around 12 weeks for a reason, and with both my DS and my MC, my "plan" was to hold my breath from BFP to 12 week scan and pray for a sticky bean.

I think if you're anxious, the early scans are only a very short break before the anxiety kicks in again. It's a shitty shitty time in the first trimester and I'd forgotten just how long and lonely it was until my second BFP.

But actually early miscarriage is a fucking lonely road as well. My husband doesn't really talk about it and my mum and friends seem to want to avoid the subject. I haven't quite found how I feel yet. I think because it's so early, I have been grieving what the pregnancy meant for us, rather than the baby. And I feel really guilty for feeling like that.

@InDreamland I hope your rainbow is a sign of better things to come. Hugs x

@Dimblebimble I think if I catch again I will go for an early scan-but not until 9 weeks+

I've had early scans with both of my pregnancies, both strangely at 8+6 and I know it sounds silly but I want to avoid that particular day again, feels like tempting fate. I don't want any internal scans if I can avoid them so by 9 weeks+ baby should be visible on a tummy scan and if there's a heartbeat the miscarriage chances drop dramatically. And if I do have another mmc at the same point (around 6 weeks) hopefully by 9 weeks my body will start to realise.

Does that make sense at all? I do feel for you. They offered me a scan at 6 weeks with my second but I said no as it could be inconclusive. At least by 9 weeks you get a much more concrete answer xxx

@InDreamland yes, I'm in two minds. Part of me thinks I should carry on as normal and not think about the pregnancy until the 12 week scan. If I don't get my hopes up I won't be as disappointed if something goes wrong...

It's going to be a very busy 2 months at work, so I'm hoping the time will pass quickly.

Thanks @Dimblebimble. That's all I really want this year, a baby that is healthy and happy. Guess we could all say that on here.

Would an early scan help with any worries right now? I guess given your last experience you'll be more cautious of the planning etc. Really hope everything is ok x

@Laney79 I've been thinking about this. I had one last time at 6 weeks because of the bleeding and another privately at 7.5 weeks so my dh could see. Both times the baby was measuring fine with a heartbeat visible on an external scan. And yet it stopped developing the next week, according to the measurements taken when my mmc was diagnosed.

I was quite cautious not to get too excited last time as I knew the miscarriage risks, but after I had the early scans I started to think ahead (when would I go on maternity leave, how would we tell family, etc). So I think it got my hopes up a bit.

So I don't know whether an early scan would help. What do you think?

@Dimblebimble fingers crossed it was just your little bean bedding in a bit better into your womb. Pleased to hear it hasn't happened again. Will you have an early scan this time? Xxx

@Laney79 it hasn't happened since, so it's been about 24 hours now. I had the exact same type of one off spotting in my last pregnancy but it was around 5 and a half weeks (I'm just over 4 weeks now) and then stopped until 9.5 weeks when I had more severe brown then red spotting. So hopefully it's not a sign of history repeating itself.

I had a severe pain the night before as I was trying to go to sleep, so I wondered if it was related. I would have put it down to implantation pains and spotting but I'd already been having positive tests for a week by the time this happened.

@Dimblebimble how's the spotting today? Has it stopped? Xxx

@InDreamland maybe the rainbow was a sign not to lose hope, and that this will be your year. Fingers crossed for you x

Glad to hear you are doing ok @KnitKitty sounds like the time you've taken is helping you. Really pleased. I'm envious of your mental strength to take a break-I'm just obsessed! But I guess that's because I'm an old bird!

I think there's a few of us getting to our year anniversary. It's about this time last year I fell pregnant for the first time, got my first ever bfp in feb. Feels like a lifetime ago. And here I am a year on, 2 pregnancies, 2 miscarriages and on CD3. It was all so easy back then. "If it happens it happens" was my attitude then I saw those two lines and I turned into a crazy woman.