TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 27 - BFPs are coming!

@OctoberGirl91 congratulations and everything crossed for you!

@OctoberGirl91 congratulations hun xx fingers crossed 🤞 for a healthy and happy pregnancy. Sending you strength and sticky bean glue xx

Thank you I’ll speak to GP I’m only 27 but little bit over weight so that might help. I’ve got rid of photo of DD and this is the test. So anxious guys trying to take it Day by day xx

@OctoberGirl91 am sure no one will be offended.

My understanding of aspirin is it can do no harm. I was advised after first MC to take it as I was nearly 38, and it might help. If you do take it, just make sure you let midwife etc know as I think it might affect your blood results. No one batted an eyelid about it for me, although only got to early stage unfortunately since then, so didn't work for me! X

Thank you @fnej01 I hope it doesn't offend anyone I will try remove it, don't want to be insensitive I know how tough miscarriages are.

Anyone know if I should try baby aspirin 75mg? Only ever had one MC but would do anything to stop it happening again x

@OctoberGirl91 congrats a lovely strong line. Fx for a happy healthy pregnancy. DD looks a real cutie

Aww @Justincase87 I am so sorry to hear about bleeding fx it's just a bump in the road.

The anxiety is so bad I've only just got my positive test and after crying I have trying be realistic and want to try get past 7+4 which when lost my last baby. Sending you lots of love

@Laney79 definitely seek some counselling I was very angry for a while then felt hopeless and really hated myself and it was so consuming. Thinking of you be kind to yourself 💖xxx

Sorry don’t know why it posted a picture of DD sorry if that offends anyone I’ll try delete it x

Well ladies I think I'm out, I woke up this morning and wiped to find a clot and some pink blood - this is exactly what happened last time before we found out our baby had died. I'm gutted but deep down I know I won't ever be a mum. They won't scan here over the weekend, and I found seeing the OOH GP really traumatic last time so I'm going to hold out until Monday when the EPU opens.

@laney79 - please consider counselling, how you are feeling is led by your emotions at the moment which is perfectly understandable, you are not out of luck, just out of hope, you need to get that hope back somehow. Look after yourself, maybe take a deliberate break that you can have some control over, then get back when your head is in the right place. I know you feel you have the pressure of your age also, but despite what you read, many many ladies go on to have healthy happy babies in their 40s. Thinking of you X

@Laney79 I definitely echo Yukka's advice below about seeing a counsellor. So sorry you are feeling like this. I know it is a cliche but time also does help. I regret not having a break earlier this year now that I am on a break. The grief comes in waves but I am managing everything so much better. And the ability to look forward to catching up with friends etc is so much easier. If not your OH do you have some close friends who's ear you can bend, over several gallons of wine about how shit and awful it's been.
I have also found great comfort in yoga and meditation just to calm and focus myself.

Thanks @Yukka I think I'm just feeling hopeless right now. I know all the stats but sadly my body has defied them pretty much at every stage. And nothing has materially changed to make me feel as though I have made any kind of difference so the outcome will just be the same.

I'm just finding it very hard at the moment. There's no chance for me this month either so I think I need to step away and seriously think if this is something I can continue to do. I'm thinking more and more about going back on the pill. I want to be a mom so desperately but this is breaking me.

I have just bought one @Lilimum5 but still waiting for first AF to use it. Was just going au naturel before the mc but now feel like need to step up our game if not necessarily going to have successful pg. Took 6 months to get this one that didn't work out and am abt to turn 35.

@Yukka and @Dimblebimble it seems to strange to be happy about a bfn test. But at least it's one less thing for me to obsess over now, just everything else to deal with. Now just to get first AF out of the way now. I've had cramps for two days but no spotting or bleeding. It's taking it sweet time. I also started temping again but I'm struggling to remember to do it when I wake up. I did it like clock work from May to August but then didn't do it for 9 weeks after my bfp and now I can't seem to remember. The alarm goes off and I don't remember until its to late I'm already up and half way across the landing before I remember.
As soon as AF arrives I can start using my
Clear blue fertility monitor. I got it really cheap on ebay only cost me £10.00 for the touch screen device and 20 sticks + 6 hpt sticks. Has anyone else used this type of monitor?

We are back on first cycle ttc. Ovulating on Monday apparently, so fingers crossed 🤞cycle seems to have gone straight back to normal which I'm taking as a good sign.

I felt very strong after the miscarriage, didn't take a single day off work and after a couple of days of mourning with dh we've only talked about ttc in a positive light. Have felt the cracks starting to show a little as Christmas approaches, it always feels like such a family time. I was looking forward to having a little one next Xmas, but that's likely not going to be the case anymore 

There's also talk of redundancies at work and I'm now paranoid that I'll be let go and will have to work a year somewhere else before ttc in order to get a maternity leave package 😖 it's not guaranteed, and if it happens it's unlikely to be my department, but my mind seems to be catastrophising at the moment 

Glad you got your bfn @Lilimum5, at least you can move forward and focus on the future now 

@Chilliandlime they said that to me too but I got a bit upset and demanded a scan. Lucky I did really too. You make sure you get the care you deserve hun xx

@Lilimum5 that's great, so pleased for you.
EPU called me back today, the midwife was a bit dismissive and said she spoke to a Dr who thought retained products were unlikely but they've offered me a scan on Wednesday, so guess I'll wait it out until then and also take a test then, really hoping for a bfn then too as it'll be 2 weeks post erpc but I know it can take longer.

Well I finally have soon good news (things are backwards) it's a bfn yay I've feel like I've waited for ever for this

Hi all,

Really sorry to hear so many of us are having such a crappy time, it's awful isn't it. I had a complete meltdown on Wednesday night, due to having to catch up with a very good friend who is pregnant and very close in date to one of my miscarriages. It was made worse by her having had a crap TTC journey herself over the years. Very emotional. Anyway getting myself back in the chrimbo mood today.

@Laney79 please look after yourself

@awakeatnight so very sorry to see you back here, and for your loss I got myself referred to Tommy's research and local RMC at same time. Tests seem similar for both a vaginal ultrasound, a suite of bloods, hormones, clotting, thyroid, rubella, lupus etc, and then the local RMC wanted a vaginal swab as well I assume to check from infection like @SerenaOverjoyed said.

As I mentioned in my previous post had first acupuncture last weekend, have had loads of creamy cm this week, which I am not sure related, but I haven't had in months. Am not TTC at the moment so AF due Monday, hoping is a sign body rebalancing. Blood test milestone for me next week.

@chilli very interesting article thanks!
@tinypaws have you tried with psychiatry self referral? In my case they were a lot more helpful than the psychological one.