TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 27 - BFPs are coming!

Hi everyone, sorry I've been a bit quiet the last week. Sending lots of love to those going through losses at the moment, and keeping everything crossed for those ttc or in early pregnancy. I also can't wait for 2018 to be over with after two losses.

I had my medical management last Friday after retained products from an erpc on 6th December, it was painful but bearable. I didn't think it would have removed everything but it only reduced the rp from 2cm to 1.9cm! So I am having an MVA tomorrow as was told this was more gentle. The Dr said they will know when they start if they can remove it all and they will use ultrasound. Have been told I probably have a bicornuate uterus so that might make it more tricky, maybe that's why they didn't get it all 3 weeks ago (although the one I had in July was fine). If they can't may have to be another erpc with a camera in a week or two. Really hoping it's going to be over after tomorrow though. I think all the worrying about the physical side of it over the last few weeks has stopped me grieving properly. Really just want to move on now xx

Welcome @Mammyofasuperbaby sorry for your loss and such a difficult time of year to manage loss and trying to be happy for your DS. How many weeks were you? I hope you’re being well supported.

Handhold right here @Wearytree - what is the FSH test for and what is the normal range? When do you see someone to review?

@Lilimum5 I’m pleased to hear your Christmas hasn’t been too bad. Same here, the worrying about how bad it was going to be was worse than the reality. I’ve still got three days at my in-laws to get through though 😄

Thank you so much for that link @MakeLemonade I'll try it when home from the in-laws.
I'll need it I think. Second bloods for FSH have come back even higher at 9.7 and a day earlier, so I would have thought they'd be lower.
Feel sick and hand hold needed so much ladies.

Can I join please.
I'm 25 and miscarried my dc2 11 days ago.
Been ttc for a year and didn't ovulate for 7 months and got pregnant as soon as I ovulated.
Ds was a difficult pregnancy with severe morning sickness, SPD, severe sudden onset pre eclampsia which lead to ds being born at 33 weeks with severe iugr.
We are looking to try again after my next AF as I have pcos and ttc has been difficult at best

Hello ladies have you all had as good a Christmas as possible. It wasn't as miserable as I thought it would be so that's a bonus

Hi ladies. I haven't been around for a while but just wanted to wish you all a Merry Christmas and wishing you all a happy new year filled with baby dust. 🎅 🎄 🍾

Hey all, I hope you've all got a fab christmas planned. If anyone deserves a good party it's the ladies on this thread🐧 Definitely make a point of enjoying a guilt free glass of tipple if you are recovering from a lost pregnancy 🍷

Thought I'd feed back from my antenatal follow up for thrombophillia (a biggie from the RMC tests). One of my clotting factors is very low so I'm being started on heparin injections as well as the asprin. My trust is now using 150mg of asprin to prevent miscarriage as a standard dose - I thought this was probably particularly helpful to know for others, I'd never have known to take asprin if it wasn't for this thread. From the sounds if it I'd never have made it beyond 5wks without it

@MeghanV07 that is so amazing. I'm relieved for you. Fingers crossed it's a healthy sticky bean.

@Lilimum5 I'm so so sorry you're having such a tough time. I just want to give you a massive hug! It's just awful isn't it and this is the worst time of year when you're grieving. Sorry I know nothing about temping, I only use OPKs.

@makelemonade I hear of so many who are ill then fall pregnant. So you might still be ok. Keeping fingers crossed for you.

I'm now starting TWW. Not confident we'll actually get pregnant this month as it's first cycle since second mc. I just can't feel the Christmas spirit feel like I'm just going through the motions and trying not to cry all the time.

@Random2468 I remember every time that I heard that news. First time she said I'm not finding the heartbeat today we need to wait two weeks and try again I was 7 + 4 but bean was only 6 weeks and no heartbeat. This time was at the 12 week scan, measurements fine but no heartbeat. I remember because she was really quiet but I could see the overhead monitor and I could see my baby had passed and the sound that sticks in my head was DH saying "no your wrong" and then sobbing. So far this loss has been the worst out of all 5 mc's. I'm just finding it difficult to deal with at the moment as this week I should 20 weeks and we would know the sex. I think what makes it all worse is that the day of the scan when we found out about this loss it was also our anniversary and the due date of the baby we lost before this last one. So yeah not feeling Christmas at all, really wish I didn't have to do it at all.

Also now I've had AF I think I'm going to take a break from charting for a while and just see what happens... I found myself becoming obsessive over it and it's not helping my anxiety levels... Trying to not think too hard about it all over the Xmas period, however my mind keeps going back to that moment where we found out our baby had died and it's so hard to get into festive high spirits. Thinking of everyone around this hard time

@Lilimum5 I totally get how upset and frustrated you must feel... it took me 9.5 weeks after my ERPC to get AF - i charted the whole time and all my bbt's were low.. each day was a new level of depressing. i finally ovulated 7 weeks later and am just finishing AF now but it felt like the longest wait where you can do absolutely nothing to hurry it on. You just desperately want it to come so you can at least try and look forward and the mc to fully be over... There's nothing we can say to change it or make you feel different but it can be totally normally to have an anovulatory cycle or not ovulate for ages... When it finally happens which it will you will feel some relief..
I'm worried now my cycles are all going to be 9 weeks long which is the frustrating thing about it - the waiting to TTC again! Also my AF was weird it was so heavy day 1, then stopped after day 2 but now 6 days later I'm getting some spotting! I presume this is my body just getting back into the swing of things but it's just miserable

Thanks both. I did another one and now it’s not as dark, strange. Unless I caught it on the downward surge? I’ll see what tomorrow brings and try and pull all my best moves on DH so I’ve got it covered either way

Good luck for your blood test @Wearytree - I find meditation very relaxing and good for when I am stressing. In particular this one: www.thehormonaltherapist.co.uk/product/deep-relaxation-audio-recording/ - might be worth a try? It always gets me to sleep really quickly!

@MakeLemonade I think that's almost almost there. This cycle I tested using OPKS every few hours after they started to get darker... I had one like yours nearly there and then a definite positive two hours later. I definitely ovulated as I got a good day 21 progesterone result from blood test.

I am actually getting ridiculous about making the best chance... I'm so jumpy about everything ☹️ if I sneeze after 7DPO I'm worried I've displaced anything there. So stupid. Also, poor DH isn't allowed to put his heated seat on in the car and I'm stressing about him drinking too much at the PILs over Christmas. I've got a repeat blood test for FSH tomorrow and I'm now stressing about that being high again and stressing that the stressing will make it worse. Also, day 3 of AF and no more blood so stressing that will encourage the FSH to kick in. I'm actually a right mess.

Any tips for being calm and relaxed anyone?

Just realised I wrote 'stressing' five times in this post.

Hello everyone,

Can I join you all?

I'm 34
TTC #2
Miscarried last Oct at 6+4
AF due January 4th
Xxx

@MakeLemonade - almost positive I would say

@MeghanV07 yay! We saw our little bean at 7+4 and it was lovely!

Great news @Meghan07! So pleased for you.

I know nothing about charts I’m afraid @Lilimum5 but I’m sorry that you’re so frustrated and feeling lost. I felt the same post TFMR and reflexology/acupuncture/time did manage to get me back on track fairly quickly but I was lucky enough not to have any complications. You’ve had a rough ride, hopefully in the next week or so it’ll all be a bit clearer.

@Wearytree I’m also worrying a bit about drinking whilst ovulating but had a glass of wine and champagne today. I don’t want to make the festive period any more miserable that it already is by being sober!

I’m new to using opks - would you consider this positive? I’m CD13 and usually have a 27 day cycle.

@Lilimum5 My first cycle after medical management was anovulatory, I still had low levels of pregnancy hormones present, but after an atypical light “period” my next cycle was normal, hopefully the same will be true for you. At any rate I’d don’t think what you’re experiencing is abnormal after everything your body’s been through.

Honestly ladies have you ever seen such a sorry chart. The 5 first days aren't af they are medical management for the 2nd time because of retained products. I know I've missed a few days but even so it looks like no ovulation at all. What do you ladies think

I have no Christmas spirt, thought it might have arrived by now but no .

As for me still no ovulation or proper AF I'm lost and don't know what to do. Is there anything I can do to make AF arrive so I can reset. Hpt - ve so that's not the problem, think I might be broken 😕. But I am super emotional and just cry a lot, especially when I have a shower. After the mc in October I took to crying in the shower so other people wouldn't see me. I've found that when people see a weakness they fall on you like vultures telling you their opinions which usually consist of "maybe you should stop putting yourself and everyone else through this all the time" or" maybe you should take the hint it's not working and just abopt". So crying in the shower has become an awful habit.

Plus side I decided to take that one day bleed as af for the purpose of starting the cycle on my clearblue fertility monitor. And today was the first test day but at least I'm in control of something even if it is only peeing on a stick as the temping is not going well as all.

@MeghanV07 that's wonderful news hun sending you lots and lots of positive thoughts and super sticky baby glue xxx

I am so pleased for you @MeghanV07 that must be such a relief. Enjoy Christmas!

Really sorry to hear of the recent bfns and losses. Hard also to see all the families and pregnant ladies, especially this time of year. No Christmas miracle for me but I’m feeling optimistic. I’ve sent off the ivf paperwork so in three months I should be good to go. DH says if it doesn’t work we will go private. So I have hope for 2019. But I’m also glad that I was pregnant this year, even for just 9 weeks, because it means we can conceive. That means a lot.

I hope everyone manages to have a nice Christmas and new year, even though it is hard. I will probably move to the infertility board shortly but will pop in on you all. Now I’m off to stuff my face with cheese and watch Christmas films :)

That's the best news @MeghanV07 so happy for you, you must be so relieved.

@Dimblebimble that's good advice, I'm trying. Had a nice long lie in today and a glass of wine last night. Am so obsessed with preserving the best chances that I worry about drinking which ttc, but at least I'll have a glass on Christmas Day now xx

We saw a heartbeat and saw the baby almost as soon as she put it on the screen. I've never cried so much in my life.

I know I'm not in the clear yet & still have a few weeks to go but I feel like I can relax a little. Thank you for your well wishes ladies xxxx